When It Don't Come Easy
by HandsThatHeal
Summary: After watching Arizona struggle both physically and emotionally to come to terms with the injuries she sustained in the plane crash, Callie decides to take matters into her own hands by embarking on a cross country adventure with Arizona and Sofia in hopes of reaffirming their love and deciding if they have what it takes to carry on as a family. COMPLETE!
1. Chapter 1

**Title:** When It Don't Come Easy

**Author:** HandsThatHeal

**Pairing:** Callie/Arizona

**Rating:** NC-17 (Eventually)

**Summary:** After watching Arizona turn away from the people who love her most as she struggles both physically and emotionally to come to terms with the injuries she sustained in the plane crash, Callie decides to take matters into her own hands by embarking on a cross country adventure with Arizona and Sofia in hopes of reaffirming their love for each other and deciding if they have what it takes to carry on as a family.

**Disclaimer:** All television shows, books, movies, songs, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work and the characters, events, and settings thereof are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.

**Chapter One:**

"Come on, Arizona...you can do this," Dr. Calliope Torres quietly muttered to herself, knees bouncing nervously as she sat alone in the back row of the observation deck of OR 2. "Come on, come on, come on..." Callie sighed. Leaning forward with her elbows resting on her knees, she pressed her palms together, placing them firmly against her lips and nose, unconsciously sending a silent prayer to anyone who was listening.

Callie knew she shouldn't be watching. She knew she should be finishing the last of her discharge summaries so she could pick up Sofia from day care and make her way home. Deep down, she knew she was being more than a little overprotective of her wife.

Callie also knew that if Arizona caught her keeping this solitary vigil over a simple laparoscopic surgical repair for pyloric stenosis, she may regret the volatile chain reaction that could only describe her wife's recently acquired temper.

And yet, she couldn't seem to find the fortitude to physically remove herself from the room. Arizona was struggling, and Callie knew it. Staring down at the back of her wife's pink butterfly scrub cap, Callie noted that Arizona's posture no longer portrayed the confidence of an accomplished pediatric surgeon, and her gloved hands no longer confidently embraced the cold steel of the surgical devices necessary to free this tiny one-month-old baby boy of the constant hunger he had been experiencing since birth.

In all likelihood, to any other onlooker, Dr. Arizona Robbins appeared perfectly self-assured in her surgical skills. Callie, however, had been observing Arizona's surgeries for close to four years now and was keenly aware of the fact that the Head of Pediatric Surgery at Seattle Grace Mercy West Hospital was no longer the same clear and rational surgeon she once was.

Standing from her seated position as she once again noticed Arizona shift uncomfortably from one leg to the other, Callie rushed from the observation deck toward the nearest telephone. Quickly paging Dr. Alex Karev to OR 2, Callie hurried the short distance to await his arrival outside the scrub room of the surgical suite. Learning back against the institutional white wall, Callie crossed her arms over her chest and squeezed her eyes shut as she puffed her cheeks to blow out an unsteady breath. Thinking back on the events of the last five months, she harshly struck the back of her head against the wall she was leaning against.

How could she have been so deluded? How could she have been so insanely, over the moon happy about the state of her life just five months ago when now...well now...she was once again nothing short of miserable? She still stood by the passionate monologue she had delivered to Drs. Alex Karev, April Kepner, and Jackson Avery all those months ago, because...

Life really did change in an instant. It really did turn on a dime. She really had met the most amazing woman, and she really was in love. Why then the misery? Why the uncertainty? And, why the uncompromising indecision surrounding every aspect of her life with this amazing woman?

Callie knew the answers to these questions. The answers were actually quite simple. The answers to each individual one of these nagging question were all the same...

Because a plane fell out of the sky.

Because a plane fell out of the sky and landed brutally on the cold hard ground in the middle of the mountains near Boise, Idaho.

Ironically, the same fucking plane that fell out of the sky and took the life of Sofia's father.

And quite contemptuously, the same fucking plane that fell out of the mother fucking sky and damaged Arizona. . .her wife. . .this amazing woman. Damaged and crippled her so tremendously. . .so scathingly both physically and emotionally that Callie feared there could never be a reprieve.

Heavy footsteps down the hall pulled Callie from the incessant thoughts that had been plaguing her since that fateful day. "What the Hell, Torres? Again?" Alex Karev shouted as he edged closer to her. "What's wrong? You paged 911!"

"It's Arizona. She's been in there for hours," Callie stated as she quickly followed him into the scrub room. "She's just not. . ."

"She's just not what, Calliope?" Callie's gaze shot up at the sound of the unexpected but familiar voice, just as she ungracefully ran into the back of Alex who had stopped abruptly in the middle of the scrub room.

"She's. . ._I'm_. . .just not what, Calliope?" Arizona asked again as she dried her hands on a blue surgical towel, her tone icily cold, the look in her clear blue eyes even more glacial.

At that moment, Callie felt strangely relieved that Alex was still standing between herself and the increasingly irate blonde. Callie's relief was short lived however as Alex quickly stepped to the side to allow Arizona two unsteady steps toward her.

"Arizona, you're. . .I'm. . ." She trailed off, lowering her eyes from Arizona's piercing glare, unsure of how to continue. She knew that anything she had to say would most likely be ill received, just like everything else she had tried to do lately for her wife, and she certainly wasn't going to have this same discussion with her wife - in front of Alex Karev - again.

Ever since Arizona had returned to the surgical schedule two weeks prior, a very similar series of events had begun, and then continued to occur. All of which included being "visited" in the middle of each and every procedure by either Callie or Alex, and even once by Miranda Bailey.

Each visit was accompanied by their incessant questions and concerns. Each visit making her feel more incompetent that the last, carving away at what little tolerance she had left for Callie's overprotection, Alex's guilt, and Bailey's. . . Arizona wasn't sure where that had come from, but could almost bet that Callie and Alex had probably been otherwise detained, sending Bailey, by proxy.

Today, however, the Peds Surgeon thought she had been able to escape their unwanted scrutiny when no one had barged into her OR with what she felt was ridiculous apprehension. Now, here she stood in the middle of the scrub room, the ache in her left leg unwavering, as she irritably awaited her wife, or her new fellow, to make words.

Looking down at his watch, Alex was the first to speak. "Everything go ok in there? Did you run into complications?" He asked, looking from his watch to his boss. Choosing to continue, even though Arizona's glare dared him to, he said, "The board said your surgery started at 1:30. It's almost 4:00, now. That surgery should only take 30 minutes...an hour at most."

Arizona eyes darted between Alex and Callie, who remained dejectedly quiet, staring at the floor. "Mind your own business, Karev," the blonde huffed. "I don't need you to tell me how long my surgeries should last, and I certainly do not need you," she glared at him pointedly, "or you," she stared at Callie until she reluctantly returned her gaze, "or Miranda freakin' Bailey, checking up on me every time I set foot in an OR. I'm not a child, and I'm tired of both of you treating me as one!"

"Arizona, I. . .I'm not treating you like a child, I just. . ." Callie began.

"You are!" Arizona's yelled, her voice wavering slightly as she tried to hold back the emotion threatening to spill forth. "Why can't you just believe me when I tell you that I. Am. Fine."

"Because you aren't FINE, Arizona!" Callie shot back, throwing her hands into the air, and then harshly smacking her palms against the sides of her hips. "I'm going to get Sofia. I'll be back to get you when your shift ends." With that, Callie tore open the scrub room door and was gone.

Arizona gripped the edge of the stainless steel sink, closed her eyes and inhaled deeply. Shaking her head, she moved toward the door, debating whether or not she should try to stop her wife or let her go.

"When the Hell are you going to cut the crap, Robbins?" Alex's words invaded her mind, halting the uncertainty she felt toward her next move. "You've been treating Torres like shit ever since that damn plane crashed, and I don't have the slightest idea why she continues to put up with you."

"Karev, I don't need this right now," Arizona said sternly, reaching for the handle of the scrub room door.

"You know what? I think you _do_ need this. Right now!" His anger was rising as he grabbed her hand from the door and spun her to face him.

Alex had been silently watching his mentor self-destruct since the moment she was transferred back to SGMW from Boise Memorial. He had uncharacteristically kept his mouth shut, trying to respect her emotions, but this was getting ridiculous. It had gone on long enough.

"This is all your fault, you know," he began more gently, trying to curtail his earlier animosity. "If you would have just pulled your stubborn head out of your ass long enough to let me go to Boise like I was supposed to, you wouldn't be dealing with this gigantic shit storm right now!"

"Karev. . ."

"No! Just shut the hell up for once and listen to me," he immediately interrupted her. "Because I've been listening to you spew the same self-righteous bullshit for the past five months, and I'm over it. Torres is right, Robbins! You aren't fine," he paused, wondering if he should continue. Realizing he had gone too far to stop now, he spat, "So you've got a fucked up leg! Get over it. At least you're still alive!"

"You think I don't realize that, Karev?" Came her haughty retort. "Trust me, I am very aware of the fact that I am alive, and...others...aren't!"

"So get over yourself, then! Suck it up and realize that you got a free pass from God - or whoever - and for some reason are still here!"

"I know that I am still here, but why?" She yelled, tears welling in her bright blue eyes. "Why am I still here. . .and. . .and. . .and. . .Mark is not."

Alex considered her last statement momentarily before realizing the significance of her words. "You think you don't deserve to be here, and he does? You think Torres and Sofia need him more than they need you?" He asked, already knowing the answers. "You think Callie resents you for. . .living?"

"How could she not?"

"Are you fucking serious?"

Arizona remained silent, not wanting to admit to the thoughts and fears that had been plaguing her mind ever since she sat in the middle of the mountain wilderness stroking Mark's hair and begging him to stay with her so they could go home together to Sofia and Callie. At that point, he had held on, and they had gone home together. Mark, however, had been unable to hang on for the duration and had succumbed to complications of the cardiac tamponade her suffered.

"I'm scared, Alex," Arizona finally voiced with barely a whisper. She searched his face, expecting him to respond. When he didn't, she realized he was waiting for her to elaborate.

Squeezing her eyes shut, in an attempt to hold back the tears that threatened to fall, she said, "Mark was always there. From the very beginning of my relationship with Callie. . .he was always there. Even when I didn't want him to be - which was most of the time - he was still there. And. . .and now he's not. He's gone," Arizona chuckled caustically through her tears. "I wanted him to be gone for so long, and now that he is. . .I'm scared. All the time. I'm scared that I'm not enough for them, and I'm scared that I don't know how to be Sofia's mom and Callie's wife without him here."

Arizona searched Alex's face for a reaction to her words. Watching his brow furrow, she was sure he was staring at her like she had a penis growing from her forehead.

"Are you crazy, Robbins? Did you fuck up your head along with your leg when you fell out of that plane?" Alex smirked as Arizona's lips twitched slightly into a small smile. "You don't need Mark Sloan around to determine your place as Sofia's mother and Callie's wife. Yeah, he was your daughter's father, but that's it. You are that little girl's whole world. I've seen how happy she is with you. And you are dumb as Hell if you believe for one minute that Torres doesn't think you are the best thing that has ever happened to her," Alex paused, adding, "or some other butterfly and rainbow crap like that."

Through her tears, Arizona let out a sharp laugh at Alex's memory, causing him to smile compassionately. Taking her hands in his, in an uncharacteristically caring way, he continued, "Look, Robbins. I was here when Torres found out your plane was missing. For a while I couldn't tell if she was going to punch Hunt, scream and cry, or puke on my shoes. But once it all sank in, once she was able to focus, you were her only concern. It wasn't until Avery mentioned something about Mark that he even entered her mind."

Arizona hated to admit it, but Alex's words made her feel better, even if it was at Mark's expense. She started to respond, but Alex once again continued, still holding her hands. "You need to talk to her, Robbins. She's hurting, too. You know she blames herself for that fucked up leg of yours. And you need to stop trying to pretend that you're fine, because no matter what you think, we all know that you're still struggling. And, we all. . .love you. . .too much to watch you suffer like this."

Alex's words momentarily caught her of guard. She was sure he cared for her, or he would have gone ahead to Johns Hopkins instead of staying behind to fill the void she created at SGMW during her time off following the crash. But, love? That was a completely unexpected emotion from him and an even more astonishing revelation from the usually sardonic doctor. "When did you become so human?" She asked, a truly genuine smile gracing her face.

Alex chuckled, "Well, everyone knows we have you to thank for that."

Continuing to smile, Arizona leaned forward to quickly embrace him. "Thank you, Alex," she said into his shoulder, before pulling away.

"Whatever," he shrugged. "Just don't tell anyone. You'll ruin my image."

Arizona smiled at his swift return to character. "So, now that I've gotten you to admit that perhaps, you're still a little bat shit crazy. . ." He began, following her out of the scrub room.

"Don't push it, Karev," she scoffed, a little exasperation creeping back into her voice.

"I'm just curious how the Hell you got Dr. Wyatt to clear you for surgery?" He asked, holding his hands up in front of him to halt an impending tirade. "It's a legitimate question."

Arizona looked at him sheepishly before nervously averting his questioning gaze. "She didn't. She wouldn't. . .because I stopped seeing her after only a couple visits," she explained.

"Then how..."

Rolling her eyes, she stretched her neck from side to side. "I may or may not have bullied Owen into getting me cleared," she huffed.

At the questioning raise of Alex's eyebrows, she continued. "I told him that if he didn't have me cleared, I was going to resign," she said, trying to keep the actual details of her conversation with Owen to a minimum.

"Not that you aren't a great surgeon, but that's all it took?"

Rolling her eyes once more, she conceded, "I may or may not have also threatened to take you and Callie with me. I gave him all three of our resignation letters."

"What?" He spat. "I didn't give you a resignation letter."

"So I forged both of your signatures. Big deal!" She confessed with a flourish of her hands. "It doesn't really matter, does it? I got cleared, and we're all still here. End of story."

"Does Torres know you did that?"

"Of course she doesn't," Arizona admonished. "She thinks I'm still seeing Dr. Wyatt."

"Okay, you can stop right there. I don't want to hear any more," he warned. "I'm not going to be an accessory to your manipulation of Hunt and deception of Torres."

Arizona chuckled. "Oh, don't be a wuss, Karev."

"You make a habit of purposely not talking to your wife and then when you do, completely lying to her?" Alex asked, his tone lacking the humor the blonde apparently saw in the situation.

Arizona was taken aback when she realized the unrelenting truth in his words. "No," she replied, the smug smile immediately leaving her face. "At least. . .not until recently."

Alex sighed. "You need to talk to someone, boss. And not me. . .preferably your wife. Or Dr. Wyatt."

"You really think. . ." Arizona paused wondering if she should continue her question. Deciding that right now, Alex Karev was the only person in the world who had the courage to speak candidly to her, she continued, "You really think Callie will listen to me if I do talk to her?"

"I think you already know the answer to that, but there's only one way to find out."

With that, Alex continued down the hallway, leaving her standing alone. She hated to admit it, but Alex Karev was right. Thinking back to a similar humbling conversation she had had with Mark Sloan not so many years ago, Arizona sighed.

She had done it again.

She had bailed.

Not in the physical sense, because she was in fact, still here. Still here with Callie. Still here with Sofia. Not that she had been of much use to either of them for some time, she realized. Callie had kept her heartfelt promise, though. She hadn't gone anywhere, even though Arizona had withdrawn from her and their daughter out of fear of their rejection. Emotionally, however, she had bailed, leaving Callie with the responsibility of doing everything she could not.

At that moment, Arizona Robbins became acutely aware of what she needed to do to reclaim her life – aware of what she needed to do to pull herself up out of the pit of Hell she had been living in for the past five months.

She needed to talk to Callie.

**XXXXXX**

"I was hoping for a month or two," Callie said, looking up from her hands resting in her lap and into the concerned eyes of the Chief of Surgery.

"I don't know, Torres. Arizona was already off work for close to four months," Owen sighed. "I doubt the board will approve a leave of absence of that length right now."

Callie shook her head, frustration evident in her voice. "It's not like she chose to be off work, Hunt. She wasn't just screwing around and neglecting her responsibilities," Callie exclaimed, rising from her seat. "She nearly died. . ." Callie trailed off. The thought of losing Arizona caused knots to twist in her stomach. "She nearly died because of her loyalty to this hospital, and I think the least this place can do is allow her an extended leave of absence until she is truly ready to return to work."

"I agree, Torres, but I'm not sure the board will see it that way," Owen replied. "How am I supposed to explain to them that not only are we losing our Head of Pediatric Surgery for the next couple of months, but the best damn Orthopedic Surgeon in the hospital, as well?"

Callie covered her face with her hands, shaking her head. Bringing her fingers to her temples, she rubbed them roughly, trying to ward off the ever present ache. "I wish that were true," Callie scoffed.

Owen was confused by her response, searching her face for an explanation. When he saw the glistening of tears in her eyes, his expression softened. "It's not your fault, Torres. No one blames you."

"Well, I blame myself," Callie huffed matter-of-factly before turning quickly and heading toward his office door. "Look, Owen," she said, turning to face him. "I don't care what you say to them. Hell, I don't care if I'm out of a job when I get back, but they should be more than willing to allow Arizona this time. She deserves it. She needs it. . .more than she knows. "

Standing from his seat behind the desk, Owen briefly considered the ramifications of his next words. "Go," his voice broke the silence. "I'll take care of the board."

Callie's lips twitched into a slight smile. "Thank you, Owen," she replied before rushing out his office door.

**XXXXXX**

"I know I didn't have to tell you, daddy, but I just didn't want you to be surprised," Callie said, leaning her elbows on the bar in the kitchen of the apartment, smiling as she watched Sofia stack a mountain of blocks.

"**The money is yours, Mija**," Carlos replied on the other end of the phone. "**Use it as you wish.**"

"Thank you, daddy," Callie sighed. "I just hope this helps, because I don't know what else to do. I've never felt so useless in my entire life."

"**Oh, Mija**," Carlos sighed. He hated hearing his daughter sound so dejected. **"I'm sure you are doing just fine, even if you don't realize it. I have never known a more loving and caring person in my life. Arizona is very lucky to have you."**

"I'm very lucky to have her, daddy," Callie admitted through the tears that lately never seemed to be absent from her eyes. "I just can't tell anymore if she actually cares if_ I_ live or die."

"**Calliope. . ."**

Hearing a beep through the phone, Callie glanced at the screen before interrupting him, "Daddy, that's Arizona on the other line. I have to go."

"**Alright. I love you, Mija**," Carlos began before adding, "**Please try not to lose hope**."

"I love you, too, daddy. I'll call you soon."

Switching to the other line with a quick press on the touch screen of her phone, Callie haphazardly wiped her eyes and cleared her throat. "Hey, sweetie. You ready for me to come get you?" She asked, the tone of her voice, sounding overly sweet.

"**I'll be ready in about an hour. I just wanted to give you a heads up**," Arizona answered, not fooled by the saccharine of her wife's voice. "**You ok, Calliope**?"

Callie didn't immediately respond, shocked by the question. It had been months since Arizona had shown any real concern for her. "Uhh. . .yeah. I'm. . .I'm good," she started, glancing toward the digital numbers on the microwave. "I need to run a couple errands before I get you. I should have time, but I may be a few minutes late. That ok?"

"**That's fine. Or I could just walk. . .so you don't have to rush**," Arizona offered.

"**You're not walking, Arizona. .** ." Callie scolded, irritation seeping into her voice. They had had this argument several times since Arizona's return to work the month prior. The blonde had initially been enraged by Callie's insistence to drive the short distance between the hospital and their apartment, but exhausted by their constant disagreements and realizing this was not a battle she was going to win, she had reluctantly conceded.

"**It was just a suggestion, Callie**," Arizona huffed. "**I wasn't trying to start an argument. In fact, I'm **_**really, really**_** tired of arguing with you**."

Callie closed her eyes and pushed a breath from her nose. "Me, too," Callie admitted softly. Quickly changing the subject, Callie continued, the false harmony returning to her voice, "Ok. . .so I'll be there in about an hour."

"**Ok**," Arizona replied. After a brief pause, she added, "**I love you**."

Callie smiled despite her trepidation. "Me too, Arizona."

**XXXXXX**

Limping out the front doors of Seattle Grace Mercy West Hospital, Arizona breathed deeply, appreciating the brisk fall air, before settling onto a nearby bench. Taking this quiet moment to gather her thoughts, she pondered the best way to express her feelings to Callie.

When had things gotten so out of hand?

The constant unease she now felt around her wife was something she had never experienced in the nearly four years they had been together. Eminently aware of the fact that she was the only person who could remedy this discomfort, she sighed.

Looking up into the night sky, Arizona shook her head. She was exhausted – not just physically - but mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. "What am I doing?" She asked of the vast expanse of the universe above her.

"Sounds like you're a crazy person talking to herself, if you ask me," came a sarcastic response, tearing through the silence.

Looking from the sky toward the intruder, Arizona smirked as the shorter surgeon approached her. "I've been doing lots of _crazy_ stuff lately," Arizona admitted as Miranda Bailey took a seat beside her on the bench. "Karev says I fucked up my head along with my leg," she scoffed.

Bailey regarded her former mentor's appearance with softness to her expression. "You waiting for Callie?" She asked matter of factly, looking toward the hospital's parking lot.

Arizona nodded, bracing both hands on either side of her hips, leaning forward in an attempt to find a more comfortable position. Noticing the grimace on the blonde's face, Bailey started to ask if her leg was still bothering her - but thought better of it - the answer to that particular question more than obvious. Considering her words as she studied Arizona's profile, Bailey shook her head. "These kinds of things shouldn't happen to nice people," she stated simply.

Looking toward her co-worker with questioning eyes, Arizona started to speak, but was interrupted. "You and Callie have the biggest hearts. Bigger than anyone I know. But yet, you've had to deal with more crap in the past couple years than any one couple should have to in an entire lifetime," Bailey clarified, closing her eyes and shaking her head. "Car crashes. . .plane crashes. . ." she trailed off from the memories, opening her eyes as she cautiously watched the woman seated beside her.

Arizona smiled ruefully, and then turned her head from Bailey's concerned gaze. "I love them more than anything," Arizona whispered, though she wasn't sure where exactly that statement had come from. "Callie and Sofia, I mean. They are the dream I didn't even know I had. . .but, now. . .I'm. . .I just don't even know where to begin. . .or. . .or what to do."

The general surgeon leaned forward on the bench, gently placing a hand on Arizona's shoulder. The two sat in silence momentarily, both considering their thoughts. Looking toward Bailey, Arizona patted the hand on her shoulder with her own, unsure of what more to say.

The Peds Surgeon's thoughts were immediately cut off by a horn blaring from somewhere in the parking lot. Turning her head toward the offensive noise, fully expecting to see Callie in their SUV, Arizona's eyes continued to search the rows of parked cars when their search for her wife came up empty.

As the horn continued to sound, Bailey stood, grabbing Arizona's hand when she noticed the blonde struggle briefly in her own attempt to stand. Strutting toward the parking lot with Arizona close behind her, Bailey huffed, "What kind of fool honks their horn all the way through a damn hospital parking lot at almost 10 o'clock at night?"

Finally spotting the source of the commotion both halted in shock, staring with their mouths agape at the sleek black RV approaching them. "What the Hell?" Bailey quipped as the giant vehicle rolled to a stop along the curb in front of them.

Almost immediately, the door of the enormous recreation vehicle opened to reveal a stunning Latina bounding down the few steps to land on the sidewalk with a flourish, a megawatt smile gracing her face as she took in the stupefied looks of the two women standing in front of her. "Hey!" She stated cheerfully, joyful eyes locking with the confused ones of her wife.

"Wha. . .what? What the Hell is that?" Arizona asked as Callie stepped closer to her. "Where's Sofia?"

Filling the last bit of space between them, Callie took Arizona's hands in hers. Glancing briefly toward Bailey, Callie was suddenly overcome with the same unease she had felt in her wife's presence for the past several months, her confident smile fading. Considering the reassuring nod of Bailey's head, Callie turned back toward her wife, he fingers nervously spinning the wedding band on Arizona's left hand.

"Arizona. . ." Callie began, looking up from their joined hands and into her eyes. "This is an RV. . .and Sofia is asleep inside," she answered dumbly. When Arizona didn't respond, Callie sighed, closing her eyes to collect her thoughts. Opening them in order to gaze into the blue eyes she adored, Callie continued, "I love you, Arizona. I love you so much, and it kills me to see you. . .in so much pain. I've allowed you to withdraw and. . .and. . .struggle for way too long."

"Callie. . ."

"No, please! Please let me finish," Callie interrupted, squeezing her wife's hands. "We were happy. . .so. . .so happy, sweetie. Then. . .Nick. Then the plane. . .and. . .and Mark. . .and. . .your leg. . ." Callie trailed off, fighting back tears. "It has never been easy for us, Arizona. . .I know that. But. . .but lately, it's just been so. . .so hard."

Upon hearing her wife's honest, yet tentative words, Arizona retracted her hands, stepping back and looking toward the ground, hurt and regret rising in her chest. Callie's eyes immediately widened with frustration and fear upon feeling her wife's withdrawal. Glancing from the blonde's downturned head toward her friend, she hoped to somehow find the strength necessary to continue. Upon receiving a scornful, but supportive glare from Miranda Bailey, Callie cleared her throat, steadying herself to continue.

Obstinately stepping back into her wife's space, she grabbed Arizona's wrists and pulled her closer. Placing a hand under her wife's chin, Callie lifted Arizona's head to meet her gaze. "Look at me, babe," she insisted when Arizona looked everywhere but at her. When tearful blue eyes finally reached her chocolate ones, Callie smiled weakly. "We're going away for a while, Arizona. You. . .me. . .and Sofia. We're taking this _big ass_ bus. . .and we're leaving Seattle," she softly insisted.

Arizona searched Callie's face for further explanation, but when none came, she shrugged. "I have patients, Callie. . .you have patients. . ."

"Nope. . .no patients," Callie replied proudly. "Owen has granted us an extended leave of absence. For at least a month. . .maybe two. . ."

"I didn't ask for time off," the blonde immediately interrupted, the hurt she had been experiencing suddenly turning to annoyance. Her Type A personality, along with the anger she now constantly seemed to harbor immediately took hold of her already fragile emotional state, as she once again pulled away from her wife. "I'm not going anywhere, Callie," she continued hostilely. "I was already off work for almost four months. . .I. . .I have responsibilities here. I can't just leave. . ."

"Yes you can, boss," Alex Karev stated, walking up behind them to stand next to Bailey.

Arizona turned to face him, feeling completely claustrophobic in the presence of these three surgeons. "Karev. . ."

"What?" He shrugged almost sheepishly, trying to diffuse her anger. "We can handle everything here," he replied, giving her a warning glare.

"Please, Arizona," Callie almost begged. "We need this. We need this time to figure things out. To decide where we go from here."

Arizona shook her head stubbornly, turning awkwardly to walk away. "Why?" She yelled, halting in mid retreat, spinning around to face them instead. Stalking toward Callie, her anger continued to rise. "Why are you doing this to me? Haven't you already done enough?!"

Callie recoiled, looking as though she had just been slapped. Taking in the guilt and sadness in her wife's eyes, Arizona softened, instantly regretting the presence of such unwarranted anger – instantly regretting her harsh words. "No, Calliope. . .I'm sorry. . .I didn't mean. . ."

A tear trickled down Callie's cheek as she nodded her head ruefully. Quickly brushing it away in an attempt to steady herself, Callie persisted. "Look, Arizona. We need to get away from here for a while," she paused, but then her face took on a look of sheer determination and strength. "I'm going. . .I'm taking Sofia. . .and I'm going. With or without you. I just can't. . .I can't be here. Not anymore. . .not right now."

Arizona flinched, her mouth falling open in shock. "Wha. . .what?" She asked, clearly stunned. "You. . .you're leaving? You. . .you. . .promised me, Callie. . ."

Karev and Bailey looked between the two, confused.

Callie, however, knew exactly the promise Arizona was referring to. Letting out a bark of sarcastic laughter, she glared at her wife, shaking her head. "No!" She quickly shouted, seemingly unconscious of her surroundings. "You do NOT get to throw that up in my face," she spewed, the unwavering patience she had maintained with her wife no longer present. "I'm not trying to leave you, Arizona! I just asked you to come with me, damn it! But you. . .you. . .you're always fighting me. You won't let me help you! Fuck!" Callie yelled in frustration, hurt, anger. . .all of the above. "I HAVE been here for you! Every single day. . .I've been here. But, I can't. . .I can't do it anymore. . .I can't be here for you. . .I can't do what you need me to do! Not if you won't let me!" She concluded, immediately rushing away from the three stunned surgeons before she gave into the urge to hit something. . .anything.

Pressing the heels of her hands into her eyes, in an attempt to reign in her emotions, Callie fought the oppressive urge to climb back into the vehicle and leave. Deciding against it, she turned back toward her wife one final time, looking directly into her wide, startled eyes. "I'm going to ask you one more time to come with me, Arizona," Callie offered, her voice lowering, her face softening. "I. . .did all of this for you, and I don't want to go without you. But I will. . .I will if I have to."

Karev and Bailey looked between their colleagues, both shocked at hearing the flood of emotions that had just come spilling from the Latina's lips. Callie had purposely staged their presence here tonight, but neither was sure of how to assist her in convincing Arizona to go along with her plan. If what she had just said. . .if the intensity behind her sheer honesty wasn't enough to convince Arizona, they weren't sure what was. Karev reluctantly stepped forward to speak, but Bailey grabbed his arm to stop him when she saw Arizona raise her head to gaze between Callie and the shiny RV. "Shhhh. . ." she warned.

"Please. . ." Callie begged softly, reaching her hand out for Arizona. "Please come with me. . ."

Arizona shifted from one leg to the other, fiddling with the strap of the bag on her shoulder. Her gaze darted from the door of the RV to the strained face of her wife as she mentally scrutinized every word Callie had just uttered.

Why was she still fighting Callie so hard? Why was she being such a petulant. . .bitch, when all Callie was guilty of was loving her? She had already admitted to Karev that her own fears and insecurities were creating the chasm between herself and Callie, so why was she still pushing her away?

Letting out a ragged breath, Arizona turned away from her love and stepped toward where Bailey and Karev stood a few feet away.

"Arizona. . ." Callie breathed out, her mouth falling open in shock as more tears sprung to her eyes. Regarding Arizona's retreat as her decision to stay in Seattle, she slowly lowered her proffered hand, internally berating herself for losing her temper so ruthlessly in such a public setting. Her heart broke as she turned toward the RV in an attempt to escape this Hell she had been living in.

"Don't disappoint me, Karev. . ."

Callie stopped suddenly upon hearing Arizona's words.

"I'm entrusting you with the lives of the tiny humans. . ." she continued.

Callie turned slowly, shocked by what she had just heard, a small smile tugging at her lips.

"That's not something I take lightly," Arizona reiterated. "When I get back. . .and I will be back. . ." she scoffed. "I better be able to pick up as if I never left. You understand?"

Karev regarded her with confusion, pondering how Callie had been able to tolerate such emotional instability from his mentor for so long. "I got it, Robbins," he finally smirked. "I learned from the best."

Arizona nodded, pressing her lips tightly together in consternation. Turning slowly, she staggered tiredly toward the RV, irritably brushing past Callie without a word. Reaching for the door handle, she tugged on it, but in vain. Relentlessly yanking the handle to no avail, she kicked the front tire like a spoiled 6-year-old. "Well, let's go, Calliope!" She huffed, rolling her eyes. "How the Hell do I get into this damn thing, anyway?" She yelled impatiently, jerking once again on the door handle.

"Easy. . .easy. Be gentle with her!" Callie scolded with an amused grin, opening the door with one smooth motion.

Callie couldn't help the slight chuckle that fell from her mouth as she watched Arizona pout her way up the steps. Before ascending the steps to follow her wife, Callie disbelievingly turned toward her friends. Alex shook his head, smirking at his mentor's antics and Miranda winked with a small smile and a thumbs up. "Thank you," Callie mouthed appreciatively before disappearing behind the door.

"Dude. . .I thought one of them was gonna go all cage fighter on the other," Alex admitted, watching the RV door closely, anticipating one of the women to be thrown out of it onto her ass.

"Those two are _the_ most headstrong. . .stubborn. . .pig-headed. . .women I've ever met," Miranda added.

"You think they're gonna be okay?" Alex asked as they watched the mammoth RV pull away from the hospital lot.

Sighing, Miranda answered with complete honesty. "I think they have to be. They were made for each other. . ."

**XXXXXX**

Entering the cabin of the RV, Callie immediately took her seat behind the wheel, purposely averting her gaze and paying little attention to her wife. She was hesitant to engage Arizona, unsure of the blonde's motive for boarding the vehicle. Deciding that she had done so simply to put an end to their public dispute, Callie sighed, discouraged. "Arizona. . .I. . ."

"Holy shit, Callie!" Arizona called, causing the Latina to literally jump upon hearing her stunned exclamation. Wandering around the extensive cabin of their new home on wheels, Arizona spotted Sofia sleeping in her crib set up in the smaller of the two bedrooms at the back of the RV. Lowering her voice, she whispered, "This thing is bigger than our apartment."

Shocked by the merriment present in her wife's tone, when she fully expected it to be dripping with disdain, Callie laughed as she navigated the RV out of the parking lot of SGMW and onto the main road. "Well, we're going to be spending a lot of time in here, so I want you to be as comfortable as possible," she shrugged.

Arizona stared at the back of her wife's head momentarily before stepping forward to take the seat beside her. Looking out the window she sighed before staring down at her hands nervously fidgeting in her lap. "Thank you, Calliope," she said after a moment, finally looking toward her wife with unshed tears gathering in her eyes.

Glancing toward the blonde, Callie smiled, simply nodding her head before directing her attention back to the road.

They remained silent for some time, Callie concentrating on driving as Arizona perused one of the many site seeing maps her wife had brought along for their trip. "So, where to, captain?" Arizona asked, breaking the strangely comfortable silence.

"Wherever you want, babe," Callie answered honestly.

"You mean you don't know where we're going?" Arizona asked, incredulously.

"I made a plan," Callie defended, worried her wife's cheerful demeanor was about to take a nose dive. "But it's not set in stone," she continued. "I just thought we could. . . Drive. Explore. Talk. Listen to some tunes. . ."

Arizona regarded her wife curiously. Conceding that it was finally time to start granting Callie the love, respect, and commitment she deserved, Arizona settled more comfortable into her seat. Pressing the power button for Callie's IPod that was nestled in the dock on the dashboard, she reclined her seat as the sound of a guitar filled the speakers.

_Red lights are flashing on the highway  
I wonder if we're gonna ever get home  
I wonder if we're gonna ever get home tonight  
Everywhere the water's getting rough  
Your best intentions may not be enough  
I wonder if we're gonna ever get home tonight_

_But if you break down  
I'll drive out and find you  
If you forget my love  
I'll try to remind you  
And stay by you  
When it don't come easy_

Sneaking a quick peak in Arizona's direction, Callie smiled as her wife mouthed some of the familiar words. Her eyes were closed, and Callie couldn't help but notice that she appeared more relaxed and if possible, more beautiful than she had in months.

Callie knew this was only the beginning. They certainly had more to say, more insecurities to bear, more tears to cry, and most definitely more wounds to heal. But right now – in this moment – she was content to be present with her wife. Happier than she had been in a very long time, Callie returned her attention to the road, as she softly sang. . .

_I don't know nothing except change will come  
Year after year what we do is undone  
Time keeps moving from a crawl to a run  
I wonder if we're gonna ever get home  
You're out there walking down a highway  
And all of the signs got blown away  
Sometimes you wonder if you're walking in the wrong direction_

_But if you break down_  
_I'll drive out and find you_  
_If you forget my love_  
_I'll try to remind you_  
_And stay by you_  
_When it don't come easy_

_So many things that I had before  
That don't matter to me now  
Tonight I cry for the love that I've lost  
And the love I've never found  
When the last bird falls  
And the last siren sounds  
Someone will say what's been said before  
Some love we were looking for_

_When you break down_  
_I'll drive out and find you_  
_When you forget my love_  
_I'll try to remind you_  
_And stay by you_  
_When it don't come easy_  
_When it don't come easy_

**AN:** The Title of this fic, as well as the song mentioned in this chapter is _When It Don't Come Easy _by Patty Griffin. Check it out!

**AN2:** This is my first Grey's Anatomy fanfiction, so be kind! Please let me know if you think it is good enough to continue as a multi-chapter fanfiction or if I should just give it a rest. Your reviews are greatly appreciated!


	2. Chapter 2

**Title:** When It Don't Come Easy

**Author:** HandsThatHeal

**Pairing:** Callie/Arizona

**Rating:** NC-17 (Eventually)

**Summary:** After watching Arizona turn away from the people who love her most as she struggles both physically and emotionally to come to terms with the injuries she sustained in the plane crash, Callie decides to take matters into her own hands by embarking on a cross country adventure with Arizona and Sofia in hopes of reaffirming their love for each other and deciding if they have what it takes to carry on as a family.

**Disclaimer:** All television shows, books, movies, songs, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work and the characters, events, and settings thereof are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.

**AN: **Special thanks to funkyshaz57 for her constructive, yet extremely helpful criticism!

**Chapter 2:**

"You really don't have to stay up with me, Arizona," Callie said softly after seeing her wife nod off for the third time in about twenty minutes. It was after one in the morning, and they had been driving for over three hours.

Arizona unsuccessfully stifled a yawn, stretching her arms overhead. "You sure?" She asked sleepily.

Callie nodded.

"Promise me you won't fall asleep at the wheel," the blonde continued with a tired smile.

Callie was momentarily struck by the familiarity of Arizona's simple request.

_Don't ever leave, promise me right now. _

_Promise me you won't let them take my leg. _

Flinching slightly, Callie shook her head reflectively, trying to rid her mind of the memories of Arizona's terrified pleas from not so long ago.

"I promise," she finally replied, her voice barely above a whisper.

Arizona carefully studied Callie's profile as the Latina concentrated on the highway in front of her. She had pushed and pushed - berated, accused, and blamed – but yet, Callie was still here.

Reaching forward with a tentative hand, Arizona brushed a strand of brunette hair from her wife's cheek, winding it behind her ear. "Okay," she finally replied, allowing her hand to linger for a brief moment before standing from the passenger's seat of the state of the art recreation vehicle Callie had purchased for this excursion. Stepping toward the driver's seat, Arizona bent down and placed the gentlest of kisses at her wife's temple. "Goodnight, Calliope," she said softly before retreating toward the back of the RV.

Upon hearing the door to the bedroom click shut, a silly grin instantly broke out onto Callie's face as she reveled in the warm fondness her wife had just shown. As quickly as her smile appeared, however, it relaxed as she immediately forced herself to reign in her optimism.

Arizona's actions and emotions had been nothing short of unstable ever since the crash, ranging at times from explosive anger and absolute denial to tormenting depression and implausible guilt. And who could really fault her? How could she possibly come to terms with such a devastating loss happening to her seemingly the hands of the person who she loved most?

Her actions were volatile, her mindset was unwavering, and it often scared Callie how quickly the blonde's psyche could change from one moment to the next. This left Callie in a constant state of uncertainty, leading her to always proceed with caution and never get her hopes up when signs of the "old" Arizona emerged.

All things considered, however, Callie was aware that their situation had improved. Arizona was no longer the uncompromising woman with bleak lifeless eyes staring daggers into her soul. She was no longer the woman so debilitated by depression that she could not physically remove herself from their bed - her words no longer dripping with accusation and condemnation.

It had taken time, but Arizona had eventually been able to partially come to terms with the fact that ultimately her leg _had _to be amputated. It _had _to be amputated in order to save her life. With Callie's continued support and tough love – though it was incessantly unwelcomed – the rational thoughts of the doctor inside her had been able to overcome the unreasonable judgments made at the scathing loss of her limb. Through this, she had reconciled with the fact that, while Callie was ultimately responsible for the amputation, she was not to blame.

Upon the acceptance of this revelation, there had been a clear shift in her behavior as well as in their relationship. While still resentful, Arizona had slowly begun to heal. She forced herself to see light at the end of the darkness. She coerced her body up and out of bed, forcing herself to communicate with Callie about the best prosthesis available. She compelled herself to productively participate with rehabilitation and to take the advice of her physical therapist.

Callie smiled, tears springing to her eyes as she fondly remembered the first time she had seen Arizona up and walking between the parallel bars in the physical therapy gym. It had been a miraculously awe-inspiring sight.

Three weeks later, Arizona insisted upon returning to work on light duty, at the hesitance of her wife and colleagues.

Two weeks after that, she personally placed her name back on the surgical schedule.

Even though her wife seemed to have progressed by leaps and bounds, Callie knew she was still struggling both physically and emotionally, which led them to their very position.

Drumming her thumbs against the steering wheel, Callie pondered her reasoning behind this impromptu road trip. It all boiled down to the fact that Arizona still wasn't the same – wasn't healed. Callie in no way expected her to ever fully return to the exact same person she had been before the crash, but she knew in her heart that Arizona still had a lot of healing and reckoning to do before she could ever truly move on, not only personally, but professionally as well.

At work, her surgeries took longer than necessary, her bedside manner faltered, and occasionally, her once steady hands shook.

At home – even though she had found some peace with Callie – their every interaction remained strained. Their conversations were uncomfortable, they barely touched, rarely kissed, and never made love. They had begun to sleep in the same bed again, but it continued to be awkward, making for less than restful nights.

While she longed to re-establish the flirty companionship they once shared, Callie was also exceedingly aware of the fact that she was lucky. Lucky that she had not lost Arizona all together. It was difficult to admit, but deep down Callie realized her wife may never again be the same cheerfully spirited woman with the super magic smile. However, the Latina was also wholly committed to helping her get back to that place. Their future together depended on it.

So, here they were aboard a 48-foot-long, nearly half of a million dollar recreation vehicle complete with two bedrooms, two baths, stainless steel appliances, posh leather seating, two fireplaces, and three flat screen televisions. When Callie had initially pondered getting away from Seattle for a while with Arizona and Sofia, her mind had immediately ventured toward tropical paradises and private white sand beaches. That notion was quickly squashed, however, when she recognized that there was no way in hell they would be getting on a plane. A trip anywhere by car or bus would be too uncomfortable for Arizona and too confining for Sofia. She had almost dismissed all thoughts of an extended vacation with her family when Derek Shepherd had suggested the use of an RV.

Briefly looking around the vast cabin of the vehicle before returning her eyes to the road, Callie chuckled. Seriously – Callie Torres – behind the wheel of a massive RV – a far cry from her beloved Thunderbird. Glancing toward the clock on the dashboard, she realized she had been lost in her own thoughts for close to an hour, the vehicle eerily quiet beyond the rumble of the motor. Glancing toward the screen of the GPS, she noticed she still had six more hours of driving before they reached their first destination. Deciding she had enough energy to push through, she powered on her IPod, getting lost in the music and the monotony of the passing road signs and glowing lines on the road.

**XXXXXX**

Arizona awoke with a start. Momentarily shaken, she scanned her surroundings as her sleepy mind began to clear, realization setting in. Looking up at the ceiling in the "master bedroom" of the RV, she smiled slightly, remembering the events of the previous night. Callie had looked so happy and excited as she proudly came bounding down the steps of the gleaming black monstrosity of a vehicle. Closing her eyes, she tried to take a snapshot in her head of Callie's smile. She missed that beaming megawatt grin – she missed a lot of things.

Rolling onto her left side, she sighed. Why was she still fighting and distancing herself from her wife? Callie had been there to support her – day in and day out – from the moment they had been rescued from the side of the mountain. She had tried to protect her, but yet Callie – her guardian and the best thing in her life – had also let her down.

Even though she had begun to _forgive_ and was slowly coming to terms with the entire horrific situation, it was, at times, impossible to _forget_ that Callie was ultimately responsible for the amputation of her leg.

The rational part of her mind realized that had their positions been reversed, had Callie been lying in the hospital bed, she would have made the exact same decision. If the unspeakable options presented to her were the choice of living with Callie without a limb versus living without Callie at all, she would have come to the same harrowing conclusion.

And yet, in the beginning, she was infinitely unable to metabolize her wife's choice. Callie had chosen to save her life at a time when her own desperate mind couldn't fathom living without such an integral part of her body.

Consequently, she had then lain in bed for months – obstinately unable to comprehend and accept Callie's unimaginable decision. She had lain in bed when Callie and Sofia needed her most – when Sofia had lost a parent and Callie had lost her best friend.

Arizona sighed, remembering Callie's strangled pleas and infuriated demands to _get up, get out of bed, and snap out of it. _Completely lost in an endless sea of absolute denial, oppressive self-degradation, and tormenting depression, she had barely been able to process breathing, let alone anything else. And on top of all these profound deeply seeded emotions – she was also just flat out pissed. Pissed at herself. Pissed at Alex. Pissed at Callie. Pissed at the world.

Cringing at a sudden sense of discomfort in her left knee, Arizona rolled onto her back in an attempt to rid it of its awkward positioning. Halting suddenly, she squeezed her eyes shut tightly; trying to force her brain to come to terms with what the rest of her was slowly beginning to accept.

There was no awkward positioning of her left knee.

There was no awkward positioning of her left knee – because there was no left knee.

Throwing back the comforter, she quickly swung her right leg over the side of the bed, abruptly forcing her body into a sitting position. Grasping the base of her residual limb, she began to coarsely massage around the now disappearing scar.

"Damn it," she muttered to herself, once again squeezing her eyes shut.

As she continued the vigorous ministrations over her angry limb, she flashed back to a night just three months prior when she had been abruptly ripped from sleep screaming in agony, her face covered in sweat and tears as the most intense pain she had ever experienced burned like a raging inferno from the tip of her left big toe all the way up to her left knee.

A left big toe and a left knee that her confused and horrified mind suddenly realized no longer existed.

Opening her eyes as the sensation began to desist, Arizona recalled the events of that night. To this day, she could still see the fear, yet steadfast protection in Callie's eyes as she came charging through the closed door of the bedroom they used to share from her position on the couch in the living room.

"_Don't touch me," Arizona demanded when Callie pulled back the covers, settling herself onto the edge of the bed in front of her and reaching forward to touch her residual limb. _

"_Arizona. . ."_

"_I said don't fucking touch me, Callie," Arizona screamed, slapping Callie's hands away, the distress still present in the blonde's rigid movements and petrified face. _

_Not deterred, Callie determinedly fought through her wife's flailing arms and reached forward, her strong hands coming in contact with the her battered limb. Without speaking, Callie began to apply pressure to and massage the amputated area trying desperately to relieve her wife's tense muscles in an attempt to lessen the horror of such profound and bewildering torture. _

_Studying Arizona's face, she watched as her body slowly began to relax. "You can't keep doing this, Arizona. . ."_

Taking a deep breath as the pain disappeared as quickly as it presented itself, Arizona stopped her motions on her leg. That night, there had been a clear shift in her behavior as well as in their relationship. While still resentful, she had slowly begun to heal. She forced herself to see light at the end of the darkness. She coerced her body up and out of bed, forcing herself to communicate with Callie about the best prosthesis available. She compelled herself to productively participate with rehabilitation and to take the advice of her physical therapist.

In that time, she had slowly found some peace with Callie, but to this date, their every interaction remained strained. Their conversations were uncomfortable – and Arizona could still barely fathom being touched or kissed, let alone allowing Callie to make love to her. They had begun to sleep in the same bed again, but it continued to be awkward, making for less than restful nights.

Reaching toward the night stand, Arizona grabbed the stump sleeve she had discarded there after removing her prosthesis the night before.

_Stump_ – such a horribly demeaning term, she thought to herself.

She had noticed her wheelchair and crutches tucked away in the closet of the bedroom while changing for bed the previous night. She could have just as easily transferred herself into the wheelchair, but the use of the wheelchair or the crutches made her feel even more debilitated and self-conscious than the prosthesis, even in the privacy of their own home.

After applying the sleeve and assuring her prosthesis was adequately in place, she lowered the leg of her pajama pants over them. Donning the shoe on her right foot, she then slowly stood from the bed.

Gone were the days of jumping up out of bed and rushing toward the front door to gather the newspaper in her bare feet as Callie poured their morning cups of coffee. There was little spontaneity left to what were once thought of as mundane everyday occurrences. Her every move now had to be carefully deliberated and thoughtfully choreographed.

Reaching for the door to exit the bedroom, she realized that the RV was no longer moving. Glancing over her shoulder toward a clock hanging on the wall, she noted the time. 9:00am already?

Exiting the room, she walked toward the bedroom where Sofia had been sleeping the night before. Leaning in the door frame, she glanced toward the crib and smiled. Sofia was already awake, however played contentedly with her favorite baby doll. "Baby sleep," she said in a lovingly sweet toddler voice as she stroked the dolls face.

"Hey, big girl," Arizona murmured as she reached into the bed to gather her daughter. "Is your baby sleeping?" Brushing errant strands of dark hair from the little girl's face, she kissed her tanned forehead.

Arizona had built up a mountain of regrets over the past few months – had behaved shamefully – but was at the time wholly unable to control the volatile emotions that seemed to morph and change without warning inside her accusatory mind and overwhelmed body. Above every spiteful thing she had done and every curse she had spewed toward her wife, friends, and therapists, it was Sofia – the disaffection she had shown the little girl in the aftermath of the crash – that was her biggest regret. Somehow, though, Sofia hadn't judged and still loved her mamma completely and without accusation.

Setting the little girl down onto now remarkably steady year and a half old feet, Arizona followed the toddler into the main cabin of the vehicle. She first looked toward the front where she and Callie had spent the first few hours of their trip. Not finding her wife there, she scanned the rest of the cabin.

To her left, she spotted a mass of unruly dark hair emerging from under blankets haphazardly thrown over the body sprawled out on one of the leather couches. Arizona shook her head as a grin formed on her face.

Callie's sleeping habits – a lot of things had changed and would continue to change in their lives – but clearly that was _not _one of them.

"Mommy sleep," Sofia squealed too loudly as she quickly toddled toward her mother's sleeping form.

"Sofia. . .no," Arizona scolded gently trying to catch her before she reached the sleeping Latina.

She was too late however, and Sofia's chubby hands made contact with her mother's face, continuously patting it not so gently as she chanted, "Mommy sleep, mommy sleep, mommy sleep. . ."

"Well, I was," the Latina groaned without moving her head from where her cheek rested flat against the pillow, her hair covering most of her face. "Morning, baby," she grumbled, reaching a hand from under the blankets, pulling the happy little girl toward her to kiss her pajama clad belly.

Stepping forward, Arizona lifted the child from the floor. "I'm sorry, I couldn't catch her in time," she apologized. Brushing the strands of chaotic hair from her wife's face, Arizona stared down into the one brown eye that opened quickly and curiously upon feeling her tentative touch. Gently continuing to stroke Callie's cheek and hair, Arizona asked, "How long have you been asleep?"

"Only about an hour," came a tired reply.

"You drove all night?" The blonde exclaimed incredulously.

At the slight nod, Arizona's face softened into what Callie thought was appreciation? Gratitude? She wasn't sure. As she started to extract herself from the warmth of her cozy cocoon, she was met with a more firm hand on her shoulder. "Stay there," Arizona began. "Go back to sleep. I've got Sofia."

Callie paused. Arizona rarely offered to care for their daughter by herself. Not because she didn't want to, the Latina surmised, but because she felt too insecure and unconfident to do so. "You sure?" She asked after a moment.

"Yeah, I'm good," Arizona replied confidently.

Nodding, Callie hastily settled back into the warmth of the blankets and pillows. "Look out the door," she slurred, her body quickly returning to its slumber. "It's beautiful out there."


	3. Chapter 3

**Title:** When It Don't Come Easy

**Author:** HandsThatHeal

**Pairing:** Callie/Arizona

**Rating:** NC-17 (Eventually)

**Summary:** After watching Arizona turn away from the people who love her most as she struggles both physically and emotionally to come to terms with the injuries she sustained in the plane crash, Callie decides to take matters into her own hands by embarking on a cross country adventure with Arizona and Sofia in hopes of reaffirming their love for each other and deciding if they have what it takes to carry on as a family.

**Disclaimer:** All television shows, books, movies, songs, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work and the characters, events, and settings thereof are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.

**AN: **Thanks so much for all of the reviews and constructive criticism! A HUGE thank you to funkyshaz57 for helping with some plot movement and dialogue I was struggling with. Without further ado. . .

**Chapter Three:**

"Grizzly Bears, Calliope. Not just one, but three. I mean, seriously. Grizzly Bears? Right there – like 20 feet in front of us. Can you even believe it?" Callie laughed optimistically at her wife's ramblings.

After spending three days enjoying the pristine forests, alpine meadows, rugged mountains, and spectacular lakes of Glacier National Park in West Glacier, Montana, the RV was now re-stocked, refueled, and ready for the next phase of their journey. With Sofia settled into her crib for an afternoon nap, Callie sat comfortably in the passenger's seat contentedly studying a road map as Arizona, who had insisted on driving for a little while, navigated the giant RV along the highway.

"It was pretty great," Callie replied with a smile.

"Are you kidding?" Arizona scoffed. "It was _awesome_."

_Awesome. _Callie momentarily flinched at the word.

_Awesome. _

_Yay! _

_Amazing. _

_Hooray! _

Callie couldn't remember the last time Arizona had used any of those words – and it wasn't until right then, upon hearing the word slip from her wife's beautiful mouth, that she realized how much she missed the blonde's beloved vocabulary.

"You're right, Arizona. It was _awesome_," Callie admitted with a chuckle as she lowered the map onto her lap to study her wife's profile. "I'm so glad you liked it."

"And the lakes were just as blue as the sky," Arizona continued happily. "Oh. . .and the glaciers. . ." She trailed off, the bright smile promptly disappearing from her face.

Instantly aware of her wife's sudden unease, Callie's smile faded. "Arizona?" She questioned, cautiously.

The body of her wife that had been tranquilly relaxed just moments prior now sat rigidly in the seat – posture fully erect, face frozen in terror, eyes fixed more to the side of the road than where they needed to be.

Following Arizona's immoveable gaze to what her wife seemed so transfixed by, Callie briefly caught sight of the green highway sign, seconds before they motored past it.

_Idaho Falls – 114 Miles_

_Twin Falls – 242 Miles_

_Boise – 324 Miles_

_Shit._

Gazing anxiously toward the road, Callie stood slowly, fearing any rapid movement may startle her wife even further. Taking a tentative step toward the blonde, Callie gently began, "Arizona. . ."

Arizona's eyes darted from the side of the road, back toward the highway in front of her. "I. . .I. . ." She stuttered through heavy breaths, her right hand forcefully gripping the steering wheel, knuckles white. Her left hand violently pulled at her shirt as if to relieve herself from its constricting oppression.

Noting her respirations further increase, Callie again looked toward the road. "Arizona," she began softly, her voice steady. "Sweetie, I need you to calm down and pull over to the side of the road."

Arizona's blinked her eyes rapidly, before squeezing them tightly shut.

"No, no. . .keep your eyes open. Keep your eyes on the road," Callie quickly requested, trying to keep her voice calm, though her fear was swiftly escalating. "Our daughter is in here with us, Arizona. And we need to keep her safe, okay?"

Arizona's eyes went wide, her chin trembling. "Sofia," the blonde seemed to recollect, sweat beading on her brow. "Callie. . .I. . .I. . .I can't move," she timidly admitted, her entire being paralyzed by wave upon wave of immeasurable panic and anxiety.

"I'm here, okay?" Callie tried to sooth.

Arizona continued to stare blanking at the road, her nod of affirmation almost imperceptible.

"Okay. . .good," Callie continued, before adding, "We need to pull over and get off the highway."

Arizona didn't speak, her panicked mind unable to process her wife's words.

"Listen to me, Arizona," Callie persisted, reaching out to gently touch her shoulder. "I'm right here with you and we. . .we are going to do this together. I'm going to slide into the seat behind you," she suggested. "All you have to do is let go of the steering wheel and take your foot off the gas pedal. We can do this. Okay?"

"O. . .o. . .okay," the blonde breathlessly agreed, nodding her head frantically up and down.

"Okay, lean forward for me," Callie instructed as she lifted her left leg over the captain's chair, situating herself, Arizona now seated between her legs. "I'm here, Arizona. You're doing great," Callie encouraged.

Arizona could only nod her head, fear still etching her every feature. Callie hesitantly rested her chin on the blonde's shoulder, softly speaking into her ear. "I've got you, Arizona. It's okay."

Reaching her left hand forward, Callie took hold of the steering wheel. "You can let go of the wheel. I'm here."

After a moment's hesitation, Arizona slowly released the wheel.

Wrapping her right arm around her wife's waist, Callie held her tightly. Sensing Arizona relax almost immediately at the deep pressure of her touch, Callie continued her gentle yet insistent instructions. "Almost done, sweetie," she spoke into her wife's ear. "Now, take your foot off the gas pedal, and I'll help you out of the seat. Okay?"

"Okay," Arizona replied.

In one swift movement, Callie forced her wife up and over her leg, Arizona awkwardly scrambling onto her feet. Now able to settle her own foot onto the brake pedal to slow the vehicle, Callie immediately navigated it toward the side of the highway. Grasping the steering wheel tightly, Callie let out a deep breath, trying to calm her more than frazzled nerves.

Looking over her shoulder to where her wife stood visibly shaken, Callie carefully considered her words. "Arizona. . ."

"Take me home, Callie!" Came the blonde's vehement demand. "I don't want to be here!"

"Arizona. . ."

"No! Don't!" She yelled, stalking toward the bedroom. "I'm going to lie down. . .and. . .and. . .and when I come out, we better _not_ be in _fucking Idaho_!"

Jumping as she heard the door slam shut, Callie closed her eyes, shaking her head. "Damn it," she growled, her hands shaking fiercely.

Two steps forward, three steps back, she thought to herself.

"Unbelievable," she muttered as she leaned forward, resting her forehead against the steering wheel.

Arizona had been prone to anxiety attacks since the crash, and Callie mentally berated herself for not anticipating such a reaction. Punching some coordinates into the GPS, Callie pondered her next move.

Maybe she should just wave the white flag and abort her mission.

Maybe she should take Arizona back to Seattle as the blonde had demanded.

Maybe she should just lie down and die – because she couldn't keep doing this alone.

Grabbing the map she had hastily thrown to the floor, she glared at it cruelly. She had no idea where they would end up next, but it certainly wasn't anywhere near _fucking Idaho_.

**XXXXXX **

Tearing off her jacket, Arizona brusquely threw it onto a chair in the corner of the room, before sitting on the side of the bed. Tossing her head back on her shoulders, she let out a sigh.

Who the Hell am I? She thought to herself, lowering her head to gaze at herself in the mirror above the chest of drawers. As she felt the RV begin to move again, she searched the face staring back at her, scrutinizing its every feature.

Once bright blue sparkling eyes now appeared dim and expressionless. Dark circles resided under those emotionless eyes and slight wrinkles gathered at their corners. Once bouncy blonde curls now hung limply around her sullen face and the dimpled grin rarely took up residence on her lips.

Sighing, she realized that progress, though staggering, had been made. Where this had once been her constant affect, it had gradually become less consistent – less unbearable and less consuming.

They had been having such a wonderful time. Over the past few days, while unease and discomfort still persisted, she had begun to feel more normal – more like the _real_ Arizona Robbins – not the confusing version of herself who merely existed simply because her heart continued to beat. Not the terrified woman begging her wife not to give up on her and certainly not the woman bearing her heart and soul to Alex Karev.

She felt more confident, more ambition, and – _happier_ than she had in months. She had taken a more active role in caring for Sofia and had caught herself, on occasion, flirting with her wife. Even while being lost in the clutches of a full-fledged anxiety attack, it had felt so good – so right – to have Callie seated so closely behind her, the Latina's front pressing into her back, a strong, tanned arm wrapped tightly around her middle.

Stupid road sign.

_Boise – 324 Miles_

Two steps forward, three steps back.

Climbing fully onto the bed and wrapping herself in the plush down comforter, she rolled onto her side, her back facing the door. Feeling the RV come to a stop, she wondered where they were and why they weren't hauling ass out of this godforsaken state. Listening intently, she heard footsteps and then the soft voice of her wife through the adjacent bedroom wall.

"Hi, sweet girl," Callie cooed. "Did you have a nice nap?"

"Me eat. . ." came the little girl's response.

Arizona heard no more words, but could hear lively music playing from Sofia's beloved Leap Frog Learn and Groove Musical Table as Callie moved about the cabin of the vehicle. Lost in her own tormented thoughts, she began to doze.

**XXXXXX**

Quietly entering the bedroom, Callie gazed upon her wife lying with her back to her on the king sized bed. The blankets tightly cocooned around her body portrayed a sense of safety and warmth, but Callie knew otherwise. She knew from the grueling experience of the months prior that this was just an illusion. This was anything but safe and warm.

Watching her wife closely, Callie realized that Arizona was probably reliving each and every aspect of the plane crash and most likely allowing herself to suffocate in her own dark and ominous thoughts.

Not wanting to push, but also not willing to allow Arizona take any unnecessary steps backward, Callie chose her words thoughtfully. "Are you okay?" She began. "Would you like to talk about what just happened?"

When Arizona didn't respond, Callie continued simply, yet firmly. "I don't want you hiding out in here. You need to try to talk to me, Arizona."

Still met with silence, she tried again – her final attempt for the evening. "I totally get what happened out there, sweetie. I understand. So, I'm going to let you stay in here a little longer, but I won't let you go back into hiding," Callie stated. "Do what you need to do, but Arizona. . .I won't let you disappear from us again. Even if right now you're angry and. . .and scared. I love you. . .so I'm going to let you do what you need, but then. . .then I want you to get up. . .get out of bed and come have dinner with me please."

With that, Callie turned, pulling the door closed behind her.

Instinctively, Arizona wanted to ignore her wife and crawl back into the tormented abyss she was so close to entering just moments prior, but suddenly from some far reaching unknown place, a new resolve filled her being.

She needed to _get up_.

She needed to figure out how to survive this.

Callie was doing everything she could – everyone was being so supportive – but it was up to her. She needed to figure out how to get right with herself. How to make this hurt go away.

Standing from the bed, she slowly stepped toward the door. Resting her hand on the door knob, she took a deep breath, steeling herself for what lay beyond this closed door.

**XXXXXX**

Hearing movement behind her from where she stood at the stove, Callie was more than a little surprised to see Arizona appear from the barrier of the closed bedroom door – a new determination seeming to emanate from her entire being. She watched silently as the blonde lifted their daughter from playing on the floor in order to resettle the chattering toddler into her high chair. Watching the blonde take a seat at the dining table, Callie's heart swelled with pride and admiration as she watched her wife cheerfully engage with their daughter.

Turning back to her work at the stove, Callie couldn't help the smile that graced her face.

"Okay. . ." Callie barely heard the tentative voice. Placing the spoon in the spoon rest, she turned toward her wife and child, leaning back against the counter top.

"Sometimes I'm going to freak out," Arizona began, her eyes moving from the blocks she was stacking with Sofia to meet her wife's supportive gaze. "Sometimes I might take three steps backward, and I'm not sure when. . .or for how long that's going to happen. What I am sure of is that I lost my leg – my _leg_, Callie. . ." She trailed off, closing her eyes to gather herself before she could continue. "And that is something that is going to take time to heal from. But. . .I love you Calliope, and I want to try. And I want. . .if. . .if you're willing. . .I want your help. But, I need you to understand that sometimes I'm going to be angry and. . .and sad. . .at least for a while."

Callie stood still as a statue, infinitely thankful for the countertop to lean against for fear she may collapse without its support. Trying to mask the surprise clearly evident on her face for fear that its presence may cause her wife to shut down, Callie simply nodded.

This was undoubtedly the most Arizona had ever said to her about the plane crash – about her own emotions. Looking into the glistening eyes of her wife, Callie fought back her own tears. Her wife, the woman who once brought so much _joy_ to her heart – but lately only sorrow – was starting to open up to her.

"Can you understand that for me?" Arizona asked, swiping a lone tear that escaped down her cheek. "And can you understand that I can't start to heal when we are in _Idaho_? So can we please just eat and then go? And maybe when we stop next. . .maybe. . .um. . .if you want. . .we could sit down together. . .and talk?"

Callie wanted to rush toward her wife – to hug her tightly – to kiss away her tears, but she remained in her place, not wanting to damage this moment. "Yeah, Arizona," she replied. "We can do that."

**XXXXXX**

"_When it gets dark,_

_The birds and the flowers_

_Shut their eyes and say good night,_

_And God, who loves them,_

_Counts the hours_

_And keeps them safe till it gets light._

_Dear Father, count the hours tonight,_

_While I'm asleep and cannot see;_

_And in the morning, may the light_

_Shine for the birds, the flowers, and me."_

From her position in the driver's seat, Callie heard Arizona trail off quietly through the baby monitor, as the blonde rocked Sofia to sleep in the smaller of the two bedrooms.

Callie sat silently, listening to Arizona's words through the monitor. "Goodnight big girl," she hears her whisper. "Mamma loves you."

Callie fully expected to hear the door to the master bedroom close once Arizona had Sofia settled in her crib. Briefly glancing over her shoulder, though, she was surprised to see her wife approaching.

Coming to stand to Callie's right, Arizona paused before gently sitting in the passenger's seat. "So, Karev sent me a text today," she offered idly. "He wanted to make sure we hadn't killed each other, yet. . ."

**AN2: **The poem mentioned is by William Hawley Smith. Your reviews continue to be appreciated!


	4. Chapter 4

**Title:** When It Don't Come Easy

**Author:** HandsThatHeal

**Beta: **Funkyshaz57

**Pairing:** Callie/Arizona

**Rating:** NC-17 (Eventually)

**Summary:** After watching Arizona turn away from the people who love her most as she struggles both physically and emotionally to come to terms with the injuries she sustained in the plane crash, Callie decides to take matters into her own hands by embarking on a cross country adventure with Arizona and Sofia in hopes of reaffirming their love for each other and deciding if they have what it takes to carry on as a family.

**Disclaimer:** All television shows, books, movies, songs, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work and the characters, events, and settings thereof are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.

**Chapter 4:**

"Arizona," Callie urged gently, trying to wake her wife, but not wanting to startle her. "Sweetie, wake up."

Arizona struggled to open her tired eyes. "Mmmm. . .no. . .I'm sleeping," came her stubborn response, her weary eyes closing once again.

Callie chuckled at her wife's antics as she knelt down beside the sleepy blonde where she still sat in the passenger's seat of the RV. Tentatively reaching out to push locks of blonde hair out of her wife's eyes, Callie gently stroked her soft cheek. "Come on, sweetie. It's two in the morning. Let's get you to bed."

Arizona's eyes slowly opened. Sitting more erect from her reclined position, she anxiously asked, "Where. . .where are we?"

Dropping the hand that was stroking her wife's cheek to rest on her right thigh, Callie squeezed it briefly in a display of understanding. "Umm. . .Utah. Near Salt Lake City," she replied. Standing from her kneeling position, she reached a hand toward her wife. "Come on. It's late. Sofia will be up before we know it."

Arizona took Callie's hand, allowing her wife to pull her into standing. Gently guiding the still half asleep blonde through the cabin of the vehicle, Callie led Arizona toward the master bedroom. Stopping in the doorway as Arizona continued through the room, Callie nervously wrung her hands. "Goodnight, Arizona," she said quietly before turning to make her bed on the couch she had been occupying since the beginning of their trip.

"Calliope. . ."

"Hmm?" Callie turned back toward her.

Arizona paused, blowing out a breath. Stepping forward, she pushed her hair back from her own face. "I. . .I'd like it if you joined me. . ."

**XXXXXX**

Callie blinked several times, fighting to remain in the comfortable abyss she was slowly being pulled from, morning sunlight seeping through the closed blinds of the RV window. Feeling a surprising, yet familiar warmth against her, she let out a contented sigh. Turning onto her back, she grasped the hand that was haphazardly flung over her waist. Lacing her own tanned fingers through pale ones, Callie lay there for several minutes, content to bask in the warmth provided by the plush down comforter and the body beside her.

Of course she had joined Arizona last night. . .or earlier that morning. Though hesitant, she longed to feel the familiar comfort they used to share and certainly did not want her wife to experience the undeniable insecurities that would have surfaced had she rejected her request.

The fact remained, however that Callie was nervous? Scared? Apprehensive? All of the above? She longed for Arizona to become comfortable with her again – but more importantly for Arizona to become comfortable with herself.

Callie also knew she couldn't push – too hard. She didn't want Arizona to move too fast, only to take three steps backward. They had reached a precipice the evening before – Arizona had finally begun to open up to her – so now, Callie would wait. She would wait because Arizona said they would talk. She would wait because she loved her wife fiercely and would be damned if she lost her. She would do anything for her.

Leaning down, Callie kissed the top of Arizona's head before extracting herself from the bed. Threading her arms through a black zip up hooded sweatshirt and pulling it over the tank top and pajama pants she wore, she exited the bedroom, gently pulling the door shut.

Briefly glancing in on Sofia, she noted that the toddler was still sleeping soundly. Placing the blanket she had kicked off back over her sleeping form, Callie then moved about the cabin of the vehicle starting a pot of coffee and pondering their day.

No more talk of _Idaho _orof _plane crashes. _No more talk of _amputations _or of _freaking out. _Not today. Today was a day to just be themselves. Just Callie Torres and Arizona Robbins spending the day with their beautiful daughter doing anything and everything their hearts desired.

Everything else would be there tomorrow – or the next day – or the next. Sadly, Callie realized, _everything else_ would be there for the rest of their lives. It would get better – it had to – but it would undoubtedly always be present, leaving a lasting impact.

Settling onto the couch, cup of coffee in one hand and her IPhone in the other, she rested her legs along the length of the couch. Scanning through some emails and missed texts, Callie smiled.

"_So excited to see you guys. When do you think you'll be here?" _She read.

Shooting off a quick text in response, Callie hurriedly closed the text screen when she heard the bedroom door open. "Morning," she said cheerfully, eyeing a less than cheerful blonde. Fearing the worst, Callie asked, "You okay?"

"Mmmm, tired," Arizona grumbled, throwing herself onto the other side of the couch.

Relieved, Callie smiled. "Want some coffee?"

"Yes. Definitely need some coffee."

Smiling as she stood, Callie moved to pour a steaming cup for her wife. Handing it to her, she returned to sit beside her wife on the couch. Allowing Arizona to enjoy a few sips, she then said, "I thought we could just have a girls' day today. You. Me. Sofia. Whatever you want to do."

Taking a few more swallows of the heated liquid, she pondered her options. Smiling cheerfully, she asked, "Can we go to the park?"

**XXXXXX**

"Mamma! Mamma!" Sofia squealed happily as she slid down the sliding board and into Arizona's waiting arms.

"Hey! There's my big girl!" Arizona cheered, pulling the toddler from the bottom of the slide.

"More. . ." Sofia yelled cheerfully, moving from Arizona's arms to run back to where Callie stood at the base of the ladder. "More, Mommy!"

"One more time, Sofia," Callie agreed, helping short legs up the steps.

"Mamma! Mamma!" She squealed again sliding down to where Arizona stood at the base of the slide.

Pulling Sofia into her arms, Arizona approached her wife who was situating herself onto the wooden ledge surrounding a giant sand box. Setting Sofia gently onto her feet inside the sand box, Arizona lowered herself to sit next to her wife.

Watching Sofia plop down onto her bottom, they sat in comfortable silence, both content to watch their daughter shovel sand into a bucket.

"I never thought I'd get to do this again," Arizona admitted softly after some time.

Turning toward her, Callie gazed at the side of Arizona's face as the blonde continued to watch Sofia. "I know. . ." Callie replied gently.

Facing her wife, Arizona's eyes glistened with unshed tears. "That was a bad day. . ."

Callie nodded grimly, remembering the day Arizona had cried in her arms after frantically pleading with her to do something – to not give up on her – to not let them take her leg. "Yeah. . .yeah, it was," she agreed sympathetically, her own eyes filling with tears. "But, today. . .today is a good day," she tried to recover, not willing to shatter the fun loving, easy-going mood that had surrounded them for the entire day.

Arizona smiled through her tears. "Yes it is," she replied, her previously care-free demeanor seeming to reemerge. Placing both hands at the sides of Callie's neck, Arizona tenderly rubbed her thumbs over her wife's cheeks as she pulled her toward her. "I love you," Arizona whispered before firmly pressing her lips to her wife's.

Pulling back slightly, she brushed Callie's nose with her own. Smiling shyly, Callie stared into her wife's eyes. "I love you, too."

**AN: **I have been miserable and anxious ever since watching the Season 9 sneak peeks and extended promo, so I decided to post something a little more "fluffy". Thanks for your continued reviews.


	5. Chapter 5

**Title:** When It Don't Come Easy

**Author:** HandsThatHeal

**Beta: **Funkyshaz57

**Pairing:** Callie/Arizona

**Rating:** NC-17 (Eventually)

**Summary:** After watching Arizona turn away from the people who love her most as she struggles both physically and emotionally to come to terms with the injuries she sustained in the plane crash, Callie decides to take matters into her own hands by embarking on a cross country adventure with Arizona and Sofia in hopes of reaffirming their love for each other and deciding if they have what it takes to carry on as a family.

**Disclaimer:** All television shows, books, movies, songs, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work and the characters, events, and settings thereof are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.

**AN: **This chapter contains spoilers for episode 9x02. Just a little warning in case you haven't seen it yet.

**AN2: **People have asked to see a map of Callie and Arizona's road trip, so here is a link to the destinations they have reached so far. maps/ms?msid=206232512902274137664.0004cb63fe36eb2ee9643&msa=0

**AN3: **Continued reviews are certainly welcome. Thanks so much to everyone for continuing to read and review!

**Chapter 5:**

"Ever been to Arizona, Arizona?" Callie joked, chuckling softly at her own absurd attempt at humor as she emerged from the RV, baby monitor in hand having just finished settling down Sofia for an afternoon nap.

Seemingly unaware of her wife's jovial mood, Arizona continued to stare out over the majestic landscape of the Grand Canyon. "Can you talk through this with me?" Arizona asked.

Taking a seat on the bench across from her wife at a picnic table in Grand Canyon National Park, Callie searched the blonde's face for further explanation.

"I need to know everything, Callie," the blonde continued.

"Arizona. . ."

"Please just start from the beginning. I want to hear it," the blonde insisted. "I. . .I think best out loud."

"No you don't," Callie replied quickly. "At least not where your own feelings are concerned. You internalize things and let them eat away at you. . .until you explode," the Latina stated. "The only time you are willing to _talk through _something is when it involves a patient."

Arizona stared at her wife, momentarily surprised by the accuracy of her statement. "Well. . .I was a patient. . ._the _patient. So, talk through this with me," the blonde rationalized.

Callie took a deep breath, looking nervously toward the sky. Arizona had read through her own patient chart time and time again – but if this was what she needed – if hearing the entire harrowing story from her own mouth would help Arizona heal, Callie would oblige.

"Umm. . .Derek's surgery. . .had already begun. . ." Callie trailed off. "Come on, Arizona. I really don't want to do this. . ."

"You told me you would sit down and talk with me about this, Callie. This is what you've wanted from me for months. And. . .now. . .I'm ready. I _need _you to tell me everything," Arizona insisted, reassuringly taking one of Callie's hands between her own. "I _need _you to really make me hear this."

Looking directly into her wife's eyes, Callie hesitated briefly before reluctantly beginning again. "I. . .I looked up to Meredith in the gallery. . .so she would know that things were going well," Callie began weakly. Upon Arizona's nod of understanding, she tentatively continued. "I had the nerve graft in my hands. . .I was beginning to place the harvested nerve between the two. . .severed ends. . ."

"And you were going to use the Epineurial closure like we talked about," Arizona added, recalling the discussions they had had concerning Derek's procedure as well as the pep talks she had granted her apprehensive wife.

Callie nodded, swallowing the lump that had formed in her throat as her eyes brimmed with tears. "Just as I was about to suture the fascicles. . .Karev came through the OR door. He said that. . .that there was a. . .problem."

Pulling her hand from her wife's, Callie brushed the tears from her face as she stood from her seat, purposely distancing herself from her wife in order to continue. "He said that. . .that you were. . .crashing," Callie's voice faltered, just like it had on that fateful day. "I. . .I just couldn't believe it. I mean, I had just left you. And. . .and you were fine. You were great."

Tears now filled Arizona's eyes as well, as she recalled hearing similar words shouted as their friends and colleagues fought for Callie's life after their car accident. "Then what happened?" Arizona insisted.

"Oh, God," Callie cried, her resolve weakening. "Please, Arizona. . .please. . ."

"I _need _you to tell me, Callie. Please. . ."

Callie took a deep breath in an attempt to steady herself. "He told me your temp was 104. . .serum lactate was 6. . ."

"Septic shock. . ." Arizona offered, having read this information in her chart.

"Yeah," Callie confirmed. She paused momentarily before her tearful eyes met those of her wife. "He was looking to me for an answer, but I. . .I just needed to think. Alex needed to shut the Hell up and just let me think for a minute," Callie paused, shaking her head. "So, I asked if he had you on pressors. But. . .he had already thought of everything. Triple antibiotics. . . IV fluids. . .he intubated you. . .started hydrocortisone. . ." Callie's tears were now flowing more freely. "Then I. . .I just couldn't think anymore. Not like a doctor at least. . .you were still deteriorating. . ."

Arizona stood from where she had remained seated on the bench. "Callie. . ."

"Then he yelled at me. . . that you were. . .dying! Dying, Arizona! You were dying! Your leg was literally killing you. You were dying!" Callie shouted.

Callie's nerves were shot, her emotions ragged. She had begged her wife for so many months to talk to her, so she could help her heal, but at no point in time had she anticipated this. At no time had she thought that Arizona would need to hear the entire story uttered from her own mouth. Shaking her head ruefully, she internally scolded herself. She should have known this would happen. She should have known that Arizona would need to hear these words from her. Whenever Arizona was puzzled about a patient or a diagnosis, this is what she needed. This is how she was able to think best. She should have known.

"I'm not sorry, Arizona," Callie huffed defensively. "I'm not sorry that I told him to. . .cut it off. . ."

"Why didn't _you_ try to save it?" Arizona questioned angrily. "Why didn't _you_ leave. . ."

Callie glared at her wife. "You were _dying_! There was no more time, Arizona! I wanted to save it! I made a plan to save it, but at that point. . .had I tried. . .had Dr. Carlson tried. . .had any damn doctor in that hospital tried, you wouldn't be here right now. You were dying!" Callie repeated, pacing further away from her wife. "It was the only way. It was the only way to save your life!"

Neither woman spoke for several long minutes, the tension filling the distance between them, palpable. "I didn't know what to do. Stay with Derek and _attempt _to fix his hand. . .or. . .or leave that OR and totally botch his surgery. . .just to watch. . .to watch Alex. . .cut off your leg," Callie shook her head. She had been arguing with herself over her decision for months. The situation was simply impossible. "I couldn't do that, Arizona. I couldn't watch. . ."

"You were supposed to protect me, Callie! _Me_! Not Derek Shepherd!"

"Well, looks like I failed you both," Callie retorted angrily. "I _abandoned _you to perform a less than _outstanding_ surgery on him. You lost your leg. . .and sometimes his hand still goes numb. I did _really_ _well_ that day," Callie chastised herself sarcastically. Shaking her head, eyes full of tears, Callie pondered her words. "I knew I couldn't live without you. I've done that before, Arizona, and it sucked. So, I took a chance. I took a chance and made the decision to cut off your leg. . .hoping that someday. . .you would be able to forgive me," she explained, her voice lowering. Setting the baby monitor down on a nearby table, Callie slowly backed away. "I guess I was wrong."

**XXXXXX**

Over an hour later, Arizona heard footsteps approaching the RV before seeing the door open to reveal her wife. Callie immediately took her seat behind the wheel of the RV without acknowledging the blonde, grabbing a map from the floor.

"Callie. . ." Arizona began from her seat on the couch where she was reading _The Cat in the Hat_ to Sofia.

"We don't have to do this," Callie cut her off. "It's totally fine. We can just go back to Seattle."

Arizona was surprised by the defeat in Callie's voice and by her actions earlier in the day. Throughout this entire ordeal, Arizona had noted that the normal positions in their relationship had somehow been reversed. Callie had taken on the role of the more supportive one. She had supported not only Arizona and Sofia, but Mark Sloan and Derek Shepherd, as well.

When Arizona was pissed off and scathingly berated Alex for being a selfish, thoughtless, horrible person, Callie hadn't judged.

When Arizona demanded she do something to save her leg, Callie fought Owen to approve a surgical repair over an amputation of the limb, even when the Latina knew deep down that an amputation and eventually a prosthesis would give the blonde a better quality of life.

When Arizona wanted nothing more than to rot away in bed, Callie had forced her up.

Callie had become. . .her rock.

Unfortunately, however, Callie's recent steadfast loyalty and unwavering protection were slowly being replaced by frustration and defeat. Arizona sighed, wondering if she had pushed too far.

"Calliope, I don't want to go home. . . I'm not. . .ready to go home. I want to be with you. . .right here. . .or wherever else you plan on driving this monstrosity," Arizona replied with a flourish of her hands.

Callie looked toward her wife, unable to hide a timid smile.

"Since all of. . ._this_. . .happened," Arizona gestured toward her left leg. "I've had so many conflicting feelings. Feelings I've never really felt before. . .emotions that I'm not used to feeling. . .emotions that feel so foreign to me because this dark, angry, scared version of me seems to always be simmering right below the surface . . . and that's not me, Calliope. It's not. . .but. . .I. . .sometimes I just don't know how to deal with it."

Silence filled the air, each woman lost in their own thoughts. "Sometimes I don't know who you are," Callie finally admitted. "It's like I'm looking at you but you just aren't there, Arizona. . .and. . .I want you back," Callie stated sadly as she stood from the driver's seat, moving through the cabin of the RV to take a seat near her wife on the couch. Scooping Sofia into her arms, Callie settled their daughter onto her lap. "We both want you back. We _need_ you back."

"I'm here, Calliope," Arizona whispered. "I want to learn how to deal with all of this. And. . .and. . .it has gotten better. Being here with you and Sofia has helped me. . .so much. More than you know," she firmly replied. "I want to be able to be your wife again, the wife that you fell in love with. I want to be able to be Sofia's mother again but sometimes I don't know how. . .but, please know that I really, really want to. I _need_ to. . .because I'm so scared that this new version of me is going to take over completely someday and that I'll never find myself again. . .and I'm scared if that happens. . .that I'll lose you Calliope. . .and I don't want to lose you."

Setting Sofia onto the floor to play with a pile of blocks, Callie turned toward her wife, taking both of the blonde's hands in hers. "I'm not going anywhere," Callie replied simply. As tough as things were and as frustrating as the constant shifts in her wife's behavior could be, the fact remained that Callie was here to stay. "I'm not going anywhere," she repeated.

Arizona let out a breath she didn't know she was holding. "I understand. . ." she began. "I understand the. . .decision you made. It's taken me a long time, but I understand, Callie. I really do. . .and. . .just. . .thank you. Thank you for choosing life."

"It was never really a choice, Arizona. I'd make the same decision over and over, again and again," Callie admitted, leaning forward to brush a kiss against her wife's forehead. "I'll always choose you."

Searching her wife's soulful eyes, Arizona hastily leaned forward, cupping her hand under Callie's chin with her fingers resting on her cheek as she pulled the Latina into a deep searing kiss. Caught off guard by her wife's sudden display of affection, Callie grasped both of the blonde's shoulders for support before pulling her closer, completely unable to deny her need to feel her wife's body pressed more firmly against her own. Pressing her body up onto her right knee, Arizona firmly grasped both sides of Callie's face as she continued her assault on the Latina's lips, taking full advantage of her elevated position.

"Mmm, Arizona," Callie murmured, pulling away breathlessly, thoughtfully casting her gaze toward Sofia who continued to play happily on the floor.

Following her wife's gaze, Arizona smiled before briefly kissing the corner of her wife's mouth. "We're going to be okay, Calliope. We're going to make it."

**XXXXXX**

"So, where to next?" Arizona asked excitedly, grabbing a map as she settled herself into the passenger's seat of the RV. "Somewhere beautiful?"

"_Everywhere_ we've been has been beautiful," Callie replied matter of factly, as she started the engine and buckled her seat belt. "And I can't tell you where we're going next," Callie teased.

"_Can't_ tell me? Or _won't_ tell me?" Arizona asked suspiciously.

Callie smiled coyly as she navigated the vehicle away from the camping area and onto the main road. "Well, I _can _tell you that we are going to be driving for a while. We'll make a couple stops to sleep at night, but if it's okay with you, I have a certain destination in mind. . ." Callie offered. ". . .for your birthday."

Biting her bottom lip, Callie nervously glanced out the corner of her eye toward her wife, trying to gauge the blonde's reaction. "Callie. . ." Arizona warned. "You know how I feel about birthdays. . .don't like them. . .don't celebrate them. . ."

Callie shook her head at her wife's ridiculous principles concerning her birthday. "I know, I know," the Latina defended. "But. . .I think you're _really_ going to like this." Arizona eyed her wife doubtfully. "Hey, don't make that face," Callie scolded cheerfully. "I promise. . .it will be fun."


	6. Chapter 6

**Title:** When It Don't Come Easy

**Author:** HandsThatHeal

**Beta: **Funkyshaz57

**Pairing:** Callie/Arizona

**Rating:** NC-17 (Eventually)

**Summary:** After watching Arizona turn away from the people who love her most as she struggles both physically and emotionally to come to terms with the injuries she sustained in the plane crash, Callie decides to take matters into her own hands by embarking on a cross country adventure with Arizona and Sofia in hopes of reaffirming their love for each other and deciding if they have what it takes to carry on as a family.

**Disclaimer:** All television shows, books, movies, songs, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work and the characters, events, and settings thereof are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.

**AN: **Thanks so much for all of your reviews. I'm so glad _most _people seem to like where this story is going. I am definitely enjoying writing this so, without further ado. . .

**Chapter 6:**

_Is she totally freaking out?_

Yeah, and she seems a little pissed.

_Maybe you should just tell her._

Are you kidding? I've driven over 2,000 miles through six states. Not giving in now. Let her sweat.

_LOL! You're mean._

;o) Really? I think I'm sweet.

_Whatever._

She's coming. Gotta go.

_Ok. Goodnight._

Quickly closing the text messaging app on her phone, Callie then set the alarm before placing the phone on the nightstand beside the bed. Rolling onto her side, she looked toward the bathroom door when she heard it slowly open. Burrowing further into the warmth of the covers, she continued to watch the door for the blonde to emerge. After several long moments, the door finally opened fully to reveal Arizona stepping out with the assistance of her crutches, her prosthesis removed prior to her entering the shower.

Leaning up onto one elbow, Callie met her wife's tentative eyes before allowing her gaze to rake over the rest of the blonde's body. After surveying perfect breasts under a light blue tank top, her gaze dropped to the waist band of the pajama shorts she was wearing. Finally allowing her eyes to return to those of her wife, Callie smiled sheepishly, unconsciously licking her lips as Arizona rolled her eyes.

"What?" Callie asked incredulously.

Leaning her crutches against the wall near the headboard, Arizona turned to sit on the edge of the bed. Realizing the blonde's insecurity by her hesitance to fully join her in the bed, Callie reached forward to rub her wife's back. "I'm sorry," she began. "I just. . ."

"No," Arizona interrupted. "Don't apologize," she continued, finally crawling under the covers on the king sized bed. "It's just that _sometimes_ I'm actually able to forget. . ."

Moving closer to her wife, Callie rested her head on her hand, propping herself up on her elbow. Looking down into the blonde's eyes, the Latina began drawing arbitrary patterns over her middle. "Forget what, sweetie?" Callie asked softly.

"My leg," Arizona replied earnestly. "Sometimes – very rare, very fleeting times – I actually _forget_ that it's gone," she admitted with a sigh. "Sometimes I'm actually able to feel like me."

"You are you, Arizona. You are hot, and you are sexy. . .and I love you."

Searching her wife's eyes, Arizona found nothing but love, devotion, and sincerity in the chocolate orbs. Smiling slightly, she grasped the tanned hand that continued to stroke her stomach and laced their fingers together.

Smiling down at her wife's face, Callie was happy to see that most of the apprehension she had noted moments before had begun to dissipate. Leaning forward, she pressed her lips to the blonde's for a chaste goodnight kiss. Surprised by the hand that suddenly wove its way into the hair at the back of her head, Callie could do nothing but accommodate its insistence to hold her closer in order to deepen the kiss.

A slight shiver coursed through the Latina's body as her wife moaned into her mouth, their kiss deepening further. Resting her left hand on top of Arizona's head, she gently clutched the blonde hair as her right hand bunched the front of her wife's tank top.

Rolling onto her side to face her wife, Arizona continued to tug at the back of the Latina's head with her left hand, her right hand squeezing her wife's left shoulder. Pressing her hands into the bed on either side of her wife's body, Callie pushed herself up and over the blonde forcing her onto her back, their lips never losing contact. Encouraged by the hand she felt begin to massage her right breast, Callie lifted her right leg, moving her body to straddle Arizona's right thigh.

Gently settling her lower half onto her wife's body, Callie traced her right hand over Arizona's chest, between her breasts, and then further south to lightly stroke her side. Dragging her lips from the blonde's for the first time since the initiation of their kiss, Callie trailed hot open mouth kisses down the pale skin of her wife's neck before nipping at the sensitive skin over her clavicle. Moving the hand that continued to stroke Arizona's side upward, she cupped her left breast. Breathing a hot breath against an erect right nipple, Callie then nipped it with her teeth as it protruded through the fabric of her wife's tank top.

"Callie. . ." The blonde murmured, pushing the fabric of the Latina's shirt up as she stroked the muscles of her back with both hands.

Pushing herself up on her right arm, Callie massaged her wife's right breast with her left hand as she stared into darkened blue eyes. Taking her wife's sexy smile as a sign to continue her ministrations, Callie quickly leaned down to once again capture the blonde's lips in a heated kiss.

Feeling the blonde urge her shirt upward, Callie reluctantly broke their kiss as she sat back on her knees to pull it over her head. Sitting up along with her wife, Arizona massaged both of Callie's breasts, eliciting a moan from the Latina's bruised lips. Quickly leaning forward, Callie pressed the blonde back into the bed as her lips once again continued their assault on those of her wife.

Pushing long brunette locks back from her wife's cheeks, Arizona settled her hands on either side of Callie's face before trailing them down the Latina's neck to once again grasp both perfectly tanned breasts.

"God, Arizona. . .you feel so good," Callie ground out as she trailed her right hand back down the blonde's side. Squeezing Arizona's left hip, Callie's hand continued its descent down her wife's left leg.

Feeling the blonde quickly tense beneath her, Callie instinctively removed her lips from those of her wife to breathe a hot breath into her ear. "You're beautiful, Arizona," the Latina murmured before once again capturing her wife's lips. Continuing to stroke the outside of Arizona's left thigh, Callie dropped her hand lower to gently cup and caress the base of the blonde's residual limb.

"No. . .Callie. . ." Arizona voiced anxiously after jerking her head to the side to brusquely pull their lips apart. "Please. . .stop. . ." she pleaded, her body now completely rigid.

Hearing the desperation in her wife's voice, Callie immediately removed her right hand from Arizona's left leg. Instantly disgusted by her own actions, the Latina quickly scrambled backward off of her wife. "I. . I'm sorry. . ." she panted breathlessly, the sincerity evident in her tone. Swallowing a lump that had formed in her throat, she faltered, "I'm so. . .so sorry. . ."

Hastily grabbing her shirt from where it had been discarded moments before, Callie hurriedly pulled it over her head to cover her naked torso. Moving to sit with her back leaning against the headboard, she desperately tried to calm her ragged breathing while still keeping a protective eye on her wife. After what seemed like an eternity of uncomfortable silence, Callie cleared her throat. "Arizona. . .sweetie?" She quietly called as she carefully placed her own shaking hand onto her wife's now trembling shoulder. Relieved when Arizona didn't flinch or pull away from her touch, Callie's heart still ached, thought, as she heard soft sobs coming from her wife.

"I'm sorry. . .I. . .I didn't realize that was going to happen," Arizona said, her voice clearly unsteady from the emotions she was now feeling. Grasping the top of the comforter tightly in both hands, she closed her eyes tightly, opening her mouth to exhale a breath of frustration. Desperately trying to gather herself as quickly as possible, she squeezed the bedding more securely in her hands as she pulled it up toward her neck to completely cover her conflicted body. Opening her eyes in search of her wife, she sighed. "Come back here, Calliope. . .please," she vulnerably requested. "Lie down with me."

Seeing her wife so distressed tore at Callie's heart. Pushing her own anxiety and guilt aside for the sake of her wife's comfort and security, the Latina carefully moved forward, delicately placing a hand on Arizona's stomach while lying down next to her. "Arizona, I. . .I didn't mean to pressure you. I just. . ."

"You didn't do anything wrong, Callie," Arizona interrupted, shaking her head regretfully. Wiping her tears, Arizona turned to Callie, embarrassment plus vulnerability clouding her beautiful features. "It's not your fault. I got caught up in the moment. God, I want you so badly. I thought I was ready. I'm sorry."

Studying the blonde's rigid posture and dejected demeanor, Callie inched closer to her wife, gently resting her cheek against the smooth skin of the blonde's bare shoulder. "Please don't be sorry," Callie tried to soothe, her right hand once again tracing patterns over Arizona's middle.

"It's been so long, Calliope. I can't. . .I can't expect you to keep waiting for me," Arizona reluctantly admitted.

Pushing up onto her left elbow, Callie stared down into her wife's dejected eyes. "Yes, you can," Callie stated firmly. "I'll wait until you're ready."

"What if I'm never ready?" Arizona asked petulantly, a pouty grimace on her face.

Callie chuckled softly, lightly stroking her wife's nose with her index finger. "You will be. You've. . .we've come so far, Arizona. With everything. This is just another hurdle we have to tackle. We'll get there," Callie stated proudly. "Besides, waiting's not so bad. . ."

Arizona let out a huff, rolling her eyes. "It's not?" She scoffed.

"Nope," Callie smiled as she leaned forward to kiss the side of her wife's mouth. "Waiting makes the sex grow hotter."

"I thought it was absence makes the heart grow fonder. . ."

"Yeah," Callie chuckled as she nuzzled her nose into the crook of her wife's neck. "That, too."

**XXXXXX**

"You ready to go?" Callie called as she exited Sofia's bedroom the following morning. Upon getting no response, the Latina shifted the toddler from one hip to the other as she again exclaimed, "Arizona?"

"I'm coming!" The blonde huffed as she exited the master bedroom, quickly brushing past her wife and daughter to throw herself down onto the couch, grumpily crossing her arms over her chest.

Callie raised one eyebrow, pressing her lips together to stifle a laugh. "Are you. . .pouting?" She asked playfully, setting Sofia onto her feet.

"I'm glad you're having such a good time with this, Calliope," the blonde retorted irritably. "I don't want to go."

"Arizona, this kind of behavior isn't cute on our 20 month old daughter, so it certainly isn't cute on you," Callie chastised, even though she secretly loved it.

"Can't you just tell me. . ."

"Look," Callie interrupted. "I promise it's not going to be like my last failed attempt at surprising you. It's _not_ a party. . .it's _not_ going to be dark and hostile. . .no one will be jumping out at you. . .it's just a. . .thing."

"A _thing_, Calliope? Seriously?" The blonde rolled her eyes as she lifted Sofia from the floor to settle the toddler onto the couch.

"Yes, Arizona. . .a _thing_," Callie reiterated, completely unwilling to give any further information. "I can't say anything else."

"Are you _sure_ you can't say anything else?" Arizona asked, as she stood and stepped toward her wife, a sexy smile on her face.

"I'm positive," Callie replied firmly, playfully shaking her finger at the approaching blonde.

Reaching forward to grasp her wife's sides, Arizona smirked. "If I tickle you, can I get you to talk. . ."

"Nope," Callie stated firmly. "You'll get me to laugh."

**XXXXXX**

Picking up rental car. Be there is 30.

_How is she?_

Pouting. Totally pissed.

_I hope it's worth it._

It will be.

"Okay. No more secrets, Callie. Tell me where we're going," Arizona demanded as she sat down in the passenger's seat of their rental car, abruptly slamming the door behind her. "And who the Hell are you texting?" She asked, her voice rising as she tried to force the phone from Callie's hand. "You haven't texted someone this much since Mark. . ." The blonde trailed off, immediately giving up her fight for Callie's phone. After a moment's hesitation, she said, "Sorry. . .I'm sorry."

Smiling slightly, Callie shrugged indifferently. "It's okay," she replied honestly, before looking toward the back to make sure Sofia was securely buckled into her car seat. Turning back to face her wife, she continued. "Arizona, if you really _have_ to know right now, I'll tell you. But, you only have like a half hour left to wait, so if you could. . ."

"Okay," Arizona relented with a sigh. "I'll wait."

"Thank you," Callie replied as she turned the key in the ignition to start the car.

Pulling back onto the road from the parking lot of Enterprise Rent-A-Car, Callie spent several minutes glancing toward her wife who silently looked out the window. Sensing a shift in the blonde's mood, Callie reached her right hand toward her wife's left, lacing their fingers together. Pulling their joined hands toward her, she gently kissed the back of the blonde's hand before resting them over her heart. "You thinking about Mark?" The Latina inquired.

Arizona sat silently for a moment before responding. "Yes. . .no. . ." She began, but then shook her head. "Just thinking about the crash, I guess."

Once again squeezing the hand that still rested over her heart, Callie then lowered their joined hands to rest on Arizona's left thigh. "You want to talk about it?"

"Could we talk about it later?" The blonde requested without hesitation. Seeing Callie's slight nod of affirmation, Arizona forced a smile onto her face. "Because my unbelievably amazing wife has a surprise for me for my birthday, even though she's a few days early. . ."

Callie shook her head. "I just can't win with you, can I?" The Latina chuckled. Arizona tilted her head to the side, a genuine smile gracing her face as she coyly deliberated her response. "And as you ponder that. . ." Callie teased, "We are here."

"Where?" Arizona asked, her head darting around as she searched her surroundings for any sign of recognition.

Silently pointing to a large block sign in front of them, Callie navigated the car toward a check point secured by two armed guards in military attire.

_Welcome to Fort Sam Houston._

Stopping the car under the awning of the checkpoint area, Callie watched as Arizona's eyes found her _surprise_ clad in sea foam green scrubs, a look of comprehension and possibly. . .dread reaching her wife's face. "Teddy. . ." the blonde whispered uneasily.

Studying her wife's face, Callie was instantly confused and worried by Arizona's lack of enthusiasm. Mentally berating herself for what appeared to be another failed birthday surprise, Callie sighed.

_Shit_.

**AN2: **So, what do you think? Good surprise? Bad surprise? Let me hear what you think!


	7. Chapter 7

**Title:** When It Don't Come Easy

**Author:** HandsThatHeal

**Beta:** Funkyshaz57

**Pairing:** Callie/Arizona

**Rating:** NC-17 (Eventually)

**Summary:** After watching Arizona turn away from the people who love her most as she struggles both physically and emotionally to come to terms with the injuries she sustained in the plane crash, Callie decides to take matters into her own hands by embarking on a cross country adventure with Arizona and Sofia in hopes of reaffirming their love for each other and deciding if they have what it takes to carry on as a family.

**Disclaimer:** All television shows, books, movies, songs, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work and the characters, events, and settings thereof are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.

**AN: **Special thanks to my Beta Funkshaz57! Also, thank you to everyone else for continuing to read and for all of your reviews and suggestions. I'm so pleased that you are enjoying this story.

**Chapter 7:**

"Sorry I got pulled into surgery earlier," Teddy apologized as she handed Arizona a glass of Chardonnay. "We can finish the tour of the hospital tomorrow if you'd like."

"That would be great," Arizona replied as she settled herself onto the couch in the living room of Teddy's off-base townhome.

"I can't believe how big Sofia has gotten," Teddy mused, as she took a sip from her own glass. "She's so beautiful, Arizona."

A genuine smile graced Arizona's features as she reflected on her little Latina. "She really is wonderful, isn't she?"

Teddy nodded. "I can't believe it's been almost six months since I've seen you guys," she mused before quietly adding, "You look good, Arizona."

Arizona took a sip from her glass of wine before standing from her seat. "You know, maybe I should go help Callie put Sofia to bed," the blonde anxiously replied, looking toward the staircase.

"They were both already asleep when I checked to see if Callie needed anything before I came downstairs," Teddy tried to reassure the blonde. "Bad ass Callie Torres asleep before 9:00pm. . ."

"I'm sure she's exhausted," Arizona instantly defended, hesitantly returning to her seat and taking another sip from her glass. "She's been driving for days. . .and before that. . ." Arizona trailed off.

Giving her a moment to collect herself, Teddy decided to urge her on. "Before that, what?" She asked.

Arizona shook her head. "We don't need to talk about this. This is supposed to be a happy visit, not. . ."

"I can tell there's something going on with you, Arizona. And with all you've been through lately, I'm not surprised. You can talk to me."

Arizona took a deep breath, pausing momentarily. "I was just going to say that Callie has taken a lot under her wing lately."

Teddy remained silent, allowing Arizona the time to continue on her own.

"After the. . .crash. . .Sofia basically went from having three devoted parents to just one. Mark was in a coma. . .my leg was in an external fixator, and I was constantly sick from the infection. Callie worked her ass off and took care of Sofia while running between Mark and me, making sure we had everything we needed," Arizona replied. "And beyond all of that, she had to prepare for her surgery to fix Derek Shepherd's million dollar hand and plan the surgery to fix my leg. . ." Arizona took a gulp from her wine glass. "Anyway. . .I'm sure she's tired."

Uncomfortable silence filled the living room. "How are the two of you?" Teddy asked.

Arizona contemplated the answer to her friend's question. "We. . .we're getting there," the blonde replied honestly. After a moment's silence, she continued. "All I could think about while I was stranded in the woods was Callie and Sofia. How desperately I wanted to get back to them. . .how scared I was that I might never see their beautiful faces again." Arizona looked toward the ceiling as tears began to pool in her eyes. Lowering her gaze back to her friend, she steeled herself to continue. "We were out there for four days, Teddy. Four horrifying days. And for four days, my thoughts of Callie and Sofia were all that kept me going."

Wiping a stray tear that slipped down her cheek, Arizona shook her head. "But. . .but then, I started to get pissed. Pissed at Alex. . .because the only reason I went on that plane was because I was pissed at him for being so thoughtless and so unappreciative of everything I had done for him," Arizona explained as she settled back into the cushions of the couch, holding onto the wine glass that was balanced on her right knee. "Then. . .then I got pissed at Mark. . ." she trailed off.

Teddy searched her friend's face for explanation. "Why Mark?" She asked in confusion.

Taking a sip from her glass, Arizona hesitated before admitting her thoughts out loud. "I. . .I was pissed at him for not fighting harder. I didn't like myself for feeling that way, but I couldn't help it. I begged him to stay alive so we could go home together. . .to Callie and Sofia. But he. . .he just lay there. . .and he just kept dying. Christina kept saving him. . .and he just kept dying."

"You shouldn't be ashamed of how you felt," Teddy tried to comfort.

Arizona shook her head, unable to find any consolation in her friend's words. "I think he kept me alive, though. He and Christina. . ." Arizona quietly replied. "He was so warm, and he was lying on my lap. . .lying next to me. . .and Christina. . .she tried so hard to keep the. . .bugs. . .out of the wound. She covered it with leaves. . .trying to form a barrier. God. . .it was so cold. . .so dark. . .I just wanted to go home. I knew if I made it home, Callie would know what to do to fix me."

Teddy couldn't help the tears that had now formed in her own eyes as she listened to her friend re-tell such a harrowing story. "Have you told Callie all of this?" She asked.

Arizona shook her head. "By the time we were rescued and then transferred back to Seattle from. . ._wherever the fuck, Idaho_. . .there was just so much more to worry about," Arizona explained. Staring down into her wine glass, she took another sip before continuing. "They originally repaired my leg with external fixation. Callie checked it every day, probably ten times a day. . .to make sure it was in proper alignment and that the surgical incisions were healing. But, the infection wasn't improving. . .I was on IV Vanc, but it wasn't helping. Mark was still in a coma. I was. . .hysterical. . ."

"Anyone would be hysterical at the thought of losing their leg. And sure, Callie was dealing with a lot, but she's strong," Teddy replied.

"It wasn't just that," Arizona began. "Callie also converted the external fixator they had used in Idaho to repair Derek's hand to an ORIF. . .and then she was making plans to surgically repair the nerve damage with a nerve graft. She already had all of this on her shoulders. . .she was dealing with all of us as well as trying to be a good mother for Sofia," Arizona paused, shaking her head at the thought of the unbelievable load her wife had been forced to bear. "I. . .I begged her not to let them take my leg. . .so she fought Owen. . .she forced him to approve surgery for intramedullary nailing as the final repair. . .even though she knew. . .Hell, even I knew. . .that amputation would be best. She did that for me. . .I couldn't add any more to her plate. I couldn't talk to her about what happened to me out there. . ."

"She wouldn't have minded. . ."

"I. . .I just couldn't," Arizona repeated.

"Is this the first time you've talked about it?" Teddy asked in disbelief.

Arizona regretfully stared into her wine glass. Reluctantly nodding, she said, "Things started to get better. Mark woke up, my infection was finally improving. The surgery to repair my leg was scheduled for the day after. . .the day after I went into septic shock. . .the day after Callie gave Alex permission to cut off my leg."

"They saved your life. . ."

"I know that," Arizona snapped. "But imagine trying to come to terms with the fact that the person you love most in the world. . .was ultimately responsible for the worst thing that has ever happened to you. Imagine waking up with the last thing you remember being you telling your wife that she was outstanding. . .an amazingly good doctor. . .only to find out that while she was fixing someone else, she sent another doctor to cut you to pieces."

"That's a little dramatic, don't you think?" Teddy warned. "And. . .you would have done the same thing if it was Callie. . .or Sofia. . .you would have chosen to save their lives." Teddy admonished. "And don't tell me you wouldn't have. . ."

Setting her wine glass onto the coffee table in front of the couch, Arizona leaned forward, her elbows resting on her thighs. "I'm able to look at it like that. . .now. . .but in the beginning. . .I was just so pissed at her. . .and so, so depressed. I don't blame her anymore. I really do understand."

"I'm glad," Teddy admitted with a smile. "She loves you, Arizona. That much is obvious."

"I know. . ." the blonde admitted, looking back toward her friend. "It's just been so hard. Mark is dead. . .and I was so paralyzed by my own grief and despair that I wasn't there for my baby when her father died. I wasn't there for my wife when her best friend died. . ."

"I'm sure she understands," Teddy replied.

"She does. . .and we've talked about it," Arizona admitted, taking the final sip from her wine glass. "Things are so much better now. We had started to mend things a little after I got my prosthesis and then finally went back to work, but it wasn't the same. She and Alex were always watching over me. . .and they were right. I wasn't really ready to go back to work when I did. I stopped seeing Dr. Wyatt, which was a huge mistake. . ."

"Maybe you and Callie should consider couple's therapy," Teddy suggested.

Arizona smiled. "Honestly, this idea of hers. . .this cross country road trip in that big ass bus she bought," Arizona chuckled. "It has been more therapeutic than any session with a therapist ever could be."

Teddy smiled at her friend, glad to see some life return to her features. "Just be honest with each other, Arizona. Don't hide from her and don't let her hide from you. Everything else will work itself out."

"Well, there's no hiding on this trip. That RV is big, but not that big," Arizona admitted with a smile.

Teddy stood, gathering their wine glasses, before walking toward the kitchen to place them in the sink. Following behind her, Arizona leaned against the doorway. "Umm. . .I'm sorry I was so weird when we first got here. I. . .I just didn't know how you were going to react. . .or how I was going to feel about you seeing me for the first time since. . ."

"You're still the same person, Arizona. If I didn't actually have the knowledge that something happened to you, I wouldn't be able to tell any difference," Teddy admitted earnestly.

Arizona considered Teddy's statement. Her friend was right - she was fundamentally still the same person she had always been. Callie had been trying to get her to believe that for months, but for some reason it took an outsider's opinion to make her truly realize that fact. "Thank you, Teddy," Arizona replied genuinely. Smiling brightly, she continued, "I'm exhausted. . .if you don't mind. . .I'm going to go join my girls for some sleep."

"I don't mind at all," Teddy replied with a smile. "And you're welcome."

"See you in the morning."

"Goodnight, Arizona."

Reaching the door of the spare bedroom, Arizona silently entered, smiling at the sight of her family sprawled out on the bed. Sofia lay in the middle of the bed, arms and leg completely stretched out, with Callie curled up on her side, one arm protectively draped over the child. Reaching over her wife, Arizona gently lifted the Latina's arm before extracting the sleeping toddler from the bed to settle her in the pack in play in the corner of the room. Slipping out of her clothes, Arizona removed her prosthesis before putting on her pajamas. Crawling into bed next to her wife, she brushed the hair back from Callie's face as she gently placed a kiss on her lips.

"Mmm. . .so tired," Callie mumbled in her half-conscious state.

"It's okay, babe. Go back to sleep," Arizona soothed, scooting closer to her wife.

"What time is it?" The Latina asked, her eyes opening slightly.

"A little before eleven."

Callie's eyes opened more fully. "Oh, God, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to fall asleep."

"It's okay," Arizona replied as she draped an arm over the Latina's waist, nuzzling her nose into her neck. "We managed," she joked.

"Did you have a good time?" Callie asked, placing a kiss on her wife's forehead.

"We. . .talked," Arizona replied honestly. "It was nice."

"I'm glad," the Latina replied quickly losing the battle to stay awake. "Love you, Arizona."

"I love you, too."

**XXXXXX**

"Brooke Army Medical Center is the only Level I Trauma Hospital in the MEDCOM and is part of the Southern Regional Medical Command," Teddy explained as she led her friends through the halls of the 450 bed facility the following morning. "We provide inpatient and outpatient care. . .general medical and surgical care for adults and peds."

"Now you've got my attention," Arizona teased, as she pushed Sofia through the hallways in her stroller.

Teddy rolled her eyes at her friend's seemingly one track mind. "This wing, though, is the Department of Orthopedics and Rehabilitation. . ."

"And now you've got _my_ attention," Callie mocked, earning a swat across her arm from her wife. "Hey!" She jokingly chided, grabbing her arm in mock discomfort.

Continuing down the halls, Teddy paused as two doctors approached. "Good morning, Dr. Altman," the eldest of the two gentleman greeted.

"Hello, Dr. Cole. Dr. McCartney," she replied, acknowledging both men. "I'd like you to meet two on my friends from Seattle Grace Mercy West. This is Dr. Arizona Robbins, Head of Pediatric Surgery and her wife, Dr. Callie Torres, Orthopedic Surgery. Dr. Cole is Head of Orthopedics and Dr. McCartney is head of Neurosurgery here at BAMC."

After the adults exchanged pleasantries, Dr. Cole squatted down in front of the stroller. "And who do we have here?" He asked kindly.

"This is our daughter, Sofia," Arizona replied happily.

"Dr. Torres," Dr. McCartney began. "We've heard a lot about you. You've made quite a name for yourself around our specialties lately," he continued.

Smiling politely, Callie asked, "And how is that, Dr. McCartney? Have you read about my cartilage research?"

"No. . .cartilage may be interesting to you and Cole here, but I'm talking about the surgeries you performed on Derek Shepherd. _The_ Derek Shepherd. Amazing work, Dr. Torres. You should be very proud of yourself."

Callie's smile faltered as she swallowed the lump that had formed in her throat. God. . .what a terrible day that had been. To the outside world, she had singlehandedly saved the career of a world renowned neurosurgeon, but to her. . .well, that may have been the absolute worst day of her life. "I. . .umm. . .well. . ."

"Yes, everyone at Seattle Grace Mercy West is very proud of her," Arizona interrupted, sensing her wife's discomfort. Looking directly into Callie's eyes, she continued. "My wife is an amazingly good surgeon. . .a genius with a scalpel if you will."

Both male doctors chuckled at Arizona's response, neither immune to her dimpled smile. "Well, ladies," Dr. Cole began. "Enjoy the rest of your tour with Dr. Altman, and we hope you enjoy your stay here in San Antonio."

As the two male doctors continued down the hallway, Teddy's pager blared. Stepping toward a nearby nurse's station, she said, "Let me just check this."

Turning back toward Callie, Arizona noticed the continued uneasiness in her wife's every feature. "You okay?" She asked as she watched Callie nervously wring her hands.

"Yeah. . .I think so. . .maybe. . .not really. . ."

"Stop, okay," Arizona gently reprimanded.

Shaking her head, Callie let out a ragged breath. "Sorry, I was just thinking. . ."

"I said stop, Calliope," the blonde reiterated. "I know what you were _just _thinking, and you need to stop."

"Arizona. . ."

"No, Callie. What you did for Derek _was_ amazing. . .and you should be _proud_ of yourself," Arizona admitted honestly. "I know I am. . ."

Callie searched her wife's face, finding nothing by pride, dedication, and love. Stepping closer to the blonde, she gently kissed her cheek. "Thank you, Arizona," she whispered in her ear before laying light kisses along her jaw line. "Thank you."

Rejoining the group, Teddy smiled. Clearing her throat, she said, "I have to check on a patient on the peds unit. . ."

"Sing it!" Arizona interrupted, quickly pulling away from her wife's moist lips. "That's awesome, Teddy. Can we come, too?"

**XXXXXX**

"Children of active or retired military of all service branches are treated here, and the Department of Pediatrics provides care to over 40,000 patients annually," Teddy said as they entered the play room on the pediatric ward.

Taking a seat on a couch in the play room, Callie pulled Sofia from the stroller to stand at a coffee table where several puzzles were strewn about. Pausing to look around the room, Arizona smiled when she saw a young boy navigating his wheelchair toward them.

"Benjamin Joseph Everett, III. It's a pleasure to make your acquaintance, mam," said the boy who was no more than 10 years old.

"Arizona Robbins, M.D." Arizona replied, firmly shaking the boy's proffered hand. "It's a pleasure to make _your _acquaintance, Benjamin."

Callie and Teddy smirked as Benjamin continued to flirt with the blonde. "I haven't seen you at BAMC before. Will you be working here, Dr. Robbins," he asked.

"Oh, no," she responded. "Dr. Altman is an old friend of mine. I'm just here for a visit."

"Dr. Altman has a friend?" Benjamin joked.

"Ha ha, Benjamin. Very funny," Teddy remarked with a smile. "And I don't just have one friend. . .this is Dr. Callie Torres. . .she's my friend, too."

"Nice to meet you," he replied quickly, before immediately returning his attention back to the new object of his affection. "When I was 4 weeks old, I was diagnosed with supravalvular aortic stenosis, pulmonary stenosis, and a genetic disorder called Williams Syndrome," Benjamin explained like the back of his hand. "Do you know what Williams Syndrome is, Dr. Robbins?"

Arizona tilted her head to the side, scrunching her face in mock concentration. "Yes, actually I do," she replied as she took a seat on the couch next to her wife. "Did Dr. Altman perform a surgery on your heart?"

"Balloon valvuloplasty, yesterday," Teddy replied.

"Hey, I was gonna say that," Benjamin whined. "Dr. Altman says I can go home tomorrow if I promise not to run around too much. Right, Dr. Altman?"

"That's right," Teddy replied.

"I don't mind the hospital, though. . ."

"Benjamin! Leave those nice ladies alone," interrupted a male voice from behind them.

"Dad!" Benjamin shouted upon seeing his father being wheeled into the room by a nurse. "Are you done with therapy?" The boy asked when his father got closer.

"Yep, just finished," he began as the nurse parked him near his son. "Had to tweak my new leg a little."

Instantly looking toward the man from where they were preoccupied with assisting Sofia in completing a Mickey Mouse puzzle, both Callie and Arizona surveyed him, noting the presence of a prosthesis on his right leg.

"Sergeant First Class Benjamin Everett, II. 101st Airborne. Afghanistan. IED. You?" He enquired as he extended his hand to Arizona.

Callie exchanged a confused glance with her wife. "How. . .how. . ."

"How did I know?" He asked with a slight smirk on his face.

"Yes, how did you know?" Callie quickly defended as Arizona remained silent.

"I saw you up on the Rehab Unit," he replied matter-of-factly. "You're pretty good, but your stance phase is still a little off. Knee flexion instability can be a real bitch."

Callie instantly stood from her seat, stepping toward him. "Who the Hell do you think. . ."

"Callie. . ." Arizona warned, raising her hand to stop the tirade she was sure was about to spew from her wife's beautiful mouth. Pausing momentarily, the blonde considered her response. "Dr. Arizona Robbins. Peds Surgery. _Dump Truck_, Idaho. Plane crash." She replied, confidently extending her hand to the man.

"Nice to meet you Dr. Robbins," he smiled genuinely, shaking her hand.

"Please, call me Arizona," she replied with a dimpled smile.

"Well, in that case, Arizona, you can call me Ben."

**XXXXXX**

"Is your wife always so defensive?" Ben asked Arizona from where they sat talking in the play room of the pediatrics unit. Teddy had excused herself fifteen minutes prior, requesting Callie join her for a quick "consult".

Handing Benjamin the last piece of the puzzle he was helping Sofia complete, Arizona sighed. "It's a long story," she replied, unwilling to elaborate.

"Okay. . ." Ben said, dropping the subject. After a moment's silence, he continued. "Look, every amputee goes through their own personal struggle. No matter what the circumstances are, the feelings are the same. Anger. . .denial. . .depression. . ."

"Definitely been through all of those," Arizona replied ruefully.

"Eventually, though, there is. . .acceptance. I've been like this for seven years, and after struggling for a long. . .long time, I was finally about to work through my feelings in order to find peace. I have a wonderful wife, and a great son. . ." Ben stated as he reached out to tousle the hair at the top of Benjamin's head. "Looks to me like you have a great support system, too."

"I do. . .I really do," Arizona genuinely replied. "Callie has been amazing. . .and this one. . ." Arizona chuckled as she lifted Sofia onto her lap. ". . .is the dream I never knew I had."

Ben smiled as he turned toward his son. "You ready to get back to your room?" He asked.

"Yep," Benjamin happily affirmed. "They're having lasagna for dinner!"

Standing from his wheelchair, Ben stepped toward the chair his son was sitting in. Grabbing the handles of the chair, he said, "When that nurse comes back for me, tell her I said to take that wheelchair and shove it where the sun don't shine."

Arizona laughed. "Will do," she replied. "It was nice meeting you, Ben."

"You too, Arizona," he said as he pushed Benjamin toward the door. "Thanks for the chat."

Smiling as the two Benjamins left the room, Arizona stood Sofia up on her thighs as she tickled the toddler's belly. "Lasagna does sound pretty good, doesn't it Sof?" Plopping the little girl down onto her lap to sit facing her, Arizona continued. "Maybe we can con mommy into making it for mamma's birthday."

"Excuse me, have you seen Sergeant Everett?"

Arizona turned to see a nurse entering the room. "Umm. . .yeah. He just took his son back to his room. He said to. . .he said he wouldn't be needing the wheelchair any longer.

The nurse rolled her eyes. "I should have known he'd do that," she laughed. Arizona smiled, realizing that she would have behaved identically to Ben. "I'm Victoria," the nurse stated as she leaned on the arm of the couch.

"Arizona," the blonde replied. "And this is my daughter, Sofia."

"Aren't you just a pretty thing," Victoria cooed as she took Sofia's hand, though her eyes were locked on Arizona, who naively continued to stare at her daughter.

"Are you visiting a patient," Victoria asked.

Turning her attention from Sofia, Arizona shook her head. "No. I'm here visiting a friend. We used to work together in Seattle. Do you know Dr. Altman?"

"Oh, Teddy," Victoria replied happily as she scooted closer to Arizona on the couch. "Yeah, some friends and I have gone for drinks with her after work a few times."

Arizona smiled, pleased to hear that Teddy was making new friends and socializing after her relocation and the death of Henry. "That's great. I'm glad to hear that."

"How long are you in San Antonio?"

"Just until tomorrow, I think. I'm not sure where we're stopping next," Arizona mused, setting Sofia back onto the floor to play.

Placing her right hand on Arizona's right thigh, Victoria leaned into the blonde's body, her scrub clad breasts gently rubbing against Arizona's arm as she rested her left arm on the back of the couch. Shifting uncomfortably, Arizona blushed as she cleared her throat. Not deterred, the brunette nurse leaned closer. "Well, maybe Teddy can watch Sofia for you tonight. So I can take you out and show you a really. . ._really_ good time," she husked into Arizona's ear.

Momentarily flattered by the young nurses advances, Arizona froze. Finally able to gather her senses, she gently removed Victoria's hand from her thigh. "Victoria," she began. "Thank you for the offer, but I'm in San Antonio with Callie. . .my wife."

Leaning away from the blonde, Victoria smiled as she stood. Grabbing the vacated wheelchair, she left Arizona with a sultry wink as she exited the play room past a tense looking Latina.

"Arizona. . ."

The blonde immediately stood from her seat, turning toward the quietly distressed voice. "Callie. . .I. . ."

"No. . .I. . .I. . .seriously?"

"Well, in my own defense. . .I had no idea she was flirting with me. . .at least not right away."

"Uh-huh. . ." Callie wasn't convinced.

"Come on, Callie. Don't be so sensitive," Arizona remarked, picking up Sofia to buckle her into her stroller. "It was completely innocent."

Callie watched as her wife nervously fiddled with the straps to Sofia's buckle. Swallowing her own pride, she said, "Well. . .I can't say I'm overly thrilled about the idea of some other woman _groping_ my wife, but I understand why. You're hot Arizona, anyone with eyes would be a fool to not want you."

Pushing the stroller closer to Callie, Arizona looked everywhere but at her wife. Placing her hands on either side of the blondes' face, Callie forced her to look into her eyes. "You're hot, Arizona. Really, _really_ hot," she repeated before sensually kissing the blonde's soft lips.

Pulling away after several long moments, Arizona sighed. Pulling her wife's hands from her face, she squeezed them with her own. "Adjusting to the new me has been so hard, Callie. It's been disappointing. . .and. . .and stressful and unfortunately, I've not reached the point where I'm completely accepting of myself. Especially not intimately."

"I know. . ." Callie replied honestly, as she squeezed her wife's hands.

"But, I'm not going to lie to you, _that_ felt. . .nice. It reminded me. . ."

Callie stepped away, pulling her hands from her wife's. "What?" Callie spat looking as if she had just been slapped. "I'm trying to be empathetic. . .and. . .and understanding of the fact that I just caught you. . ._touching_ and _flirting_ with another woman. . .and you have the nerve to tell me that you. . ._enjoyed_ it? What the Hell, Arizona?"

"Callie. . .will you please just let me finish?" The blonde requested. "Please. . ." Callie stared incredulously at her wife, her stomach churning and her heart racing. After a moment, Arizona continued. "It felt good. And it reminded me that. . . I like sex!" Arizona nervously laughed. "I am very. . .we are very sexual people, Calliope!"

Completely in shock, Callie continued to stare at her wife, unsure if she was more stunned by the blonde's revelation or by the fact that she was basically screaming about their sex life in the middle of the playroom of a military hospital.

"It reminded me that when first getting to know someone, there are butterflies. . .and. . .and nerves, but there is also excitement. . .and romance!"

"Okay?" Callie was clearly confused.

"In the beginning, I couldn't see past the physical," Arizona tried to explain. "Since the. . .amputation, I've been preoccupied with the crippling thoughts that I don't have a shapely leg for you to admire – because let's face it – you've always loved my legs, Callie. And. . .I was worried that I'm not going to be able to wear shorts, or bathing suits, or lingerie. I was worried that my femininity was somehow compromised by the loss of my leg."

"Can I buy a vowel here, babe?" Callie asked, completely confused and caught off guard by her wife's ramblings.

Arizona smiled as she stepped into her wife's space. Taking her hands back into her own, she smiled. "All I'm trying to say is that I think I'm finally able to see the big picture. Re-building my self-esteem is going to be an ongoing process, but with you. . .with your love. . .and your support, there's a way of fighting back."

"I'm here for you, Arizona," Callie replied, still unsure of exactly what to say. "Whatever you need."

"I feel attractive and sexy when I feel confident, Callie. And after today – and I'm not just talking about the _flirting_ – I feel more confident than I have in months," Arizona cheerfully replied as she leaned up to capture Callie's lips. "And it's all thanks to you. You dragged me on this trip. You're the reason I'm here. You're my reason for living."

A megawatt smile consumed Callie's face as Arizona pulled her into a tight embrace. Pulling away, the blonde pecked her wife's lips. Turning to push Sofia out the door, she looked behind her toward her obviously still dumbfounded wife. "Now, come on," she ordered the Latina. "I'm starving. . .and you're making me lasagna."

**XXXXXX**

"Thanks again, Teddy. We'll call you from wherever we end up next," Callie said as she hugged her friend before carrying Sofia up the steps and into the RV early the following morning.

Turning toward Arizona, Teddy smiled brightly. "Try to remember what I told you, okay? Don't hide from her and don't let her hide from you. Fight for her just as much as she's been fighting. Don't lose her, Arizona."

Arizona nodded, moving into her friend's embrace. "Thank you, Teddy. Thank you so much. . .for everything."

"You're great, Arizona," Teddy said as she pulled out of the blonde's embrace, tears in her eyes. "Always remember that," she continued as she squeezed her friend's arms.

"You too," Arizona replied earnestly, wiping a stray tear from her cheek as she ascended the stairs of the RV. "Don't be a stranger. . .come visit us sometime."

Teddy nodded and waved as the she watched the door close behind her friend. Turning back toward her house after the vehicle pulled away, Teddy smiled. Sometimes, there are moments in life where you want to turn back, but those are the moments when you realize you have to go on. AN2: Comments and reviews are always welcome! 


	8. Chapter 8

**Title:** When It Don't Come Easy

**Author:** HandsThatHeal

**Beta:** Funkyshaz57

**Pairing:** Callie/Arizona

**Rating:** NC-17

**Summary:** After watching Arizona turn away from the people who love her most as she struggles both physically and emotionally to come to terms with the injuries she sustained in the plane crash, Callie decides to take matters into her own hands by embarking on a cross country adventure with Arizona and Sofia in hopes of reaffirming their love for each other and deciding if they have what it takes to carry on as a family.

**Disclaimer:** All television shows, books, movies, songs, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work and the characters, events, and settings thereof are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.

**AN: **Note the rating change. I'm not sure if I would open this at work, but it's up to you. Thanks for continuing to read and review!

**Chapter 8:**

"So. . .good surprise?" Callie asked as she glanced questioningly toward her wife who was seated in the passenger's seat of the RV.

Arizona smiled. "Of course it was a good surprise, Callie," the blonde replied without hesitation.

Callie chucked, pleased with herself. "Good because you got to see Teddy? Or. . .good because you got to flirt with a ten year old boy _and_ get felt up by a hot brunette?"

"I don't remember you feeling me up," she immediately countered, a playful smirk on her face. "Did you take advantage of me while I was sleeping?"

Callie returned her wife's cheeky grin, relieved that their visit had ended on a positive note. Turning her attention back toward the road, she said, "I thought maybe we could spend Thanksgiving with your parents. We haven't seen them since. . ." Callie paused, choosing to rephrase her statement. "We haven't seen them in a few months."

When no response came from her wife, the Latina questioned, "Arizona?"

"When are we stopping again?" The blonde asked, the previously playful mood now replaced by an uncomfortable and foreboding atmosphere.

"We can stop whenever you want," Callie answered as she glanced from the road back toward her wife. "You okay?"

Arizona continued to gaze out the window. "The past six months have been the worst of my life," she began. "For a long time, I honestly didn't think. . .we were going to make it, Callie. . ."

Callie remained silent as she continued to stare at the road, desperately wishing she could turn this conversation back around. Fearing the worst, she worried her bottom lip with her teeth as knots twisted at her gut.

Turning her attention to her wife's profile, Arizona continued. "But. . .we _are _going to make it. It's taken a long time. . .but we really are going to be okay."

"Arizona. . ." Callie began, but her voice faltered at a loss for words.

"There's this one thing, though." Arizona interrupted, thoughtfully considering her next statement. "I want. . .no. . .I _need_ to tell you everything, Callie. In order for us to move forward, I need to tell you everything about the plane crash. It's important to me."

Callie let out the breath she didn't realize she was holding. "Of course," she nodded. "Whenever you're ready to tell me, I'm ready to listen."

"I'm ready. . .now," Arizona replied. "Well, not like _right _now. Not while you're driving. Just. . .whenever we stop," she nervously continued.

Callie glanced toward the anxious blonde. "Okay. We aren't far from Dallas. We can stop somewhere near there. We'll have dinner and then get Sofia ready for bed. Then. . .we can talk. Sound good?"

Arizona nodded appreciatively as she turned her attention back toward the highway in front of her.

**XXXXXX**

Sitting across the table from her wife three hours later, Arizona realized she was now more nervous than she anticipated, her earlier determination seeming to slip further and further away.

"I know you want to tell me, Arizona, but. . .if you're not ready. It's okay. I understand," Callie offered, taking her wife's hands into hers before resting them on the table top.

"No. I need to do this. Just give me a minute. . ."

Watching as the blonde closed her eyes, Callie took a deep breath, willing herself not to cry just from watching her wife's struggle. When blue eyes finally opened to meet hers, Callie smiled reassuringly.

"I was sitting on the left side of the plane. . .facing the cockpit. Mark was across the aisle from me, and Christina was in the seat behind me. I think. . .Lexie was behind her and Meredith and Derek were across from Lexie. . ." Arizona paused, pondering the accuracy of her statement. "No. . .Meredith and Derek were across from Christina. . .not across from Lexie. . ."

Callie nodded. Unsure of the importance of their exact seating arrangement, she waited patiently, unwavering to allow her wife to tell the story in her own way. . .at her own pace.

"Looking out the window, I could see us kind of. . .rocking. . .or vibrating, but we weren't falling. It just felt. . .strange. Then it got eerily quiet as it became more and more obvious that something wasn't right. I remember hearing twisting metal, feeling a rush of cold. . .cold air. And I think I felt us hit the ground or maybe it was the trees. . .it was like we. . .bounced. . .and then skidded to a halt," Arizona paused, her eyes glassy with unshed tears. "The next thing I remember was the sound of screaming. . .and it just wouldn't stop. I couldn't think, and I just needed the screaming to stop."

Callie squeezed Arizona's hands in hers. Reaching forward, the Latina wound a stray lock of hair behind her wife's ear. Closing her eyes, Arizona leaned her face into her wife's comforting hand. "Then I heard Christina shout something like, 'shut up! Just shut up!' And that. . .that's when I realized that _I _was the one screaming."

Callie pulled a shaking hand away from her wife's face. Willing herself to be stronger, she clasped her own hands together when she realized that this story could only get worse. Pulling her chair around the side of the table, Callie sat as closely to her wife as possible. Turning toward the blonde, she kissed her temple, once again taking her wife's hands into hers.

"I was just laying on the ground, unable to really move, but Mark, Christina, and Meredith _seemed _to be in fairly decent shape. We didn't know where Derek or Lexie were. So. . .they went to look for them. They just left me there, Callie. . .they left me all alone."

"Arizona. . ."

"No. I get it. Mark loved Lexie. Christina is Meredith's person. . .or whatever. . .and they needed to find her husband. I get it. . ."

"Mark shouldn't have left you. . ."

"He needed to find Lexie, Callie. I get it. . .I understood. So. . .I pulled myself off the ground. . .and sat up against the plane. My left leg hurt so. . .so badly. I knew it was broken. . .and there was a puncture in my scrub pants, so I ripped them apart the rest of the way. I think I started to hyperventilate. God it was just so. . .shocking. . .I mean. . .I think I was in a little bit of shock, because for a while I just couldn't stop laughing."

"Jerry. . .the pilot was paralyzed. . .they found Derek and Lexie, but she was. . .dead. And Mark. . .Meredith had to do a damn pericardiocentesis with the pump of my hairspray bottle. Derek's wound was held together by a safety pin. I splinted my own leg. . ." Arizona paused, shaking her head. ". . .and that was just in the first four hours."

Callie closed her eyes. She knew hearing this was going to be difficult, and she had tried to prepare herself for months for this exact moment, but no amount of planning could have readied her for this.

"Jerry was suffering from autonomic dysreflexia. We ran out of water. There were no more matches. Christina kept trying to keep the bugs out of my leg. I'm pretty sure animals. . .ate. . .Lexie. . ."

Callie covered her mouth with her hand, unsure if she could continue, but knowing she had to. Moving her hand from in front of her face, Callie swallowed the lump that had formed in her throat.

"Four days, Callie. That's all. It doesn't seem so bad. But it was. . .it was horrible. . .and terrifying. . .and for four days, all I could think about was you and Sofia. I begged Mark to stay alive, but he just kept dying. I was pissed because I couldn't understand why he didn't want to go home to you and Sofia as much as I did. All I wanted was to go home to you. . .and I kept telling myself that if I made it home, you would know what to do to fix my leg."

"Arizona, I'm so. . .so sorry," Callie whispered as she wiped a tear from her face. "I failed you. . .I. . ." she trailed off, looking down to where their joined hands rested in her lap.

"Shhh. . ." Arizona tried to sooth, as she placed a hand under Callie's chin, pulling her head up so she could meet her gaze. "You did _everything_ you possibly could."

Callie shook her head as more tears began to pool in her chocolate eyes. "I've built arms out of nothing. . .and legs like. . .God, but for you. . .the most important person in my life, I couldn't do anything. I did _nothing_."

Taking the Latina into her arms, Arizona held her tightly, allowing her wife to cry on her shoulder. "I'm so. . .so sorry," Callie whispered through her tears and she clung to Arizona's body.

The weight of the raw emotions coursing through her mind and body soon broke away the last brick in the walls Arizona had erected since the amputation of her leg, as she too began to cry. Clinging to each other as if their lives depended on the other's embrace, they continued to cry for several moments.

When their tears finally slowed, Callie pulled away from her wife, hastily wiping her eyes. "I'm sorry. I. . .didn't mean to do that," Callie replied as she used her thumbs to cast away the tears from Arizona's face.

Arizona smiled before leaning forward to kiss away the remaining tears from her wife's cheeks. "I love you, Callie. I love you so much."

Callie nuzzled her nose against the blonde's cheek. Gently continuing its soft caress over the side of her wife's face, she caressed her other cheek with the tips of her fingers. "I love you, too," Callie husked into Arizona's ear. Placing her index finger under the blonde's chin, Callie tilted her head up before taking Arizona's lips into a gentle, yet insistent kiss.

Wrapping her left hand around her wife's waist, Arizona clutched the shirt covering Callie's middle as she leaned further into the passionate joining of their lips. Running her right hand from Arizona's cheek, down her neck, and then across her chest, Callie urgently clung to her wife's left shoulder as she pressed her breasts firmly into the front of the blonde.

Pulling back, desperate for oxygen, Arizona pushed long brunette hair back from the Latina's cheek before taking both sides of her face into her hands. Smiling nervously, Arizona stared into Callie's lust filled eyes. Leaning forward, she briefly nipped at Callie's bottom lip, pulling it back between her teeth before releasing it with a pop.

Quickly recapturing the blonde's lips, Callie gently ran her tongue along Arizona's bottom lip, begging for entrance into the warmth of her mouth. Feeling her wife's tongue flick against her own, Callie deepened the kiss even further, allowing their tongues to explore each other.

Lowering her lips down Arizona's neck as her right hand gently cupped the blonde's left breast, Callie heard her wife gasp as she started to nip at the other breast through her shirt and bra. "Callie. . ." Arizona breathed. "Please. . ."

Pulling back to search her wife's face, Callie started to move away from the blonde, but was surprised when Arizona grabbed both of her forearms, pulling her closer to her. Kissing down Callie's neck, Arizona then pulled back so she could stare into her wife's soulful eyes. "Take me to bed, Calliope," she whispered. "Make love to me. . ."

Callie searched the darkened blue eyes staring into her soul. Reveling in the determination and lust she found there, Callie immediately stood, pulling the blonde along with her.

Shutting the bedroom door behind them, Arizona turned back to Callie who stood staring at her from the foot of the bed. Crossing the room, Arizona stood in front of her wife, her left hand trembling as she pushed her fingers through thick brunette hair. Wrapping her arms around her wife, Callie pulled her closer before turning them around so the backs of Arizona's legs hit the mattress at the foot of the bed.

Gently pushing on the blonde's shoulders, Callie urged her to sit down. Kneeling between Arizona's legs, Callie looked up into her eyes as she began to unfasten the buttons at the front of her wife's shirt. After discarding it, Callie lowered her lips down Arizona's neck as her fingers worked to unhook the front latch of the light purple lace bra she was wearing.

Looking down at her wife, Arizona watched as the Latina completely removed her bra and then palmed her left breast as she started to devour the other with her mouth. "Mmm, Callie. . ." the blonde moaned, tossing her head back on her neck as she felt her right nipple go from hot and wet to cold and hard under the ministrations of her wife's tongue and lips. Kissing the valley between her wife's perfect breasts, Callie then rewarded Arizona's left breast with the same loving attention.

Pulling back, Callie's eyes locked with Arizona's as she unhooked the button of her jeans before slowly lowering the zipper. Urging the blond to raise her hips off the bed, Callie curled her fingers into the waist band of her wife's jeans as she slowly started to pull them over her hips and down her thighs. "Callie. . ." Arizona reluctantly stated as the Latina watched the muscles in her midsection tighten.

Stopping for a brief moment to once again gaze into her blue eyes, Callie calmly smiled before leaning up to gently kiss her pink lips. "It's okay, Arizona. Let me love you, baby," she requested simply as she continued to lower the blonde's jeans and panties to the floor.

Consumed by the mixture of lust, love, and undying commitment she recognized in her wife's chocolate eyes, Arizona didn't stop her, but instead leaned back on her elbows biting her bottom lip as she watched Callie remove both of her shoes. Flinching slightly when her now discarded pants revealed the cool metal of her prosthesis, Arizona let out a staggering breath as she once again found Callie's eyes.

Grasping both of her wife's hips in her hands, Callie caressed down the outsides of the smooth thighs before returning her hands upwards to repeat their downward path on the sensitive skin at the inside of the blonde's thighs. Glancing at the prosthesis momentarily, Callie lovingly caressed the socket as if it were an organic part of her wife's body. Lovingly placing a kiss on the knee joint, Callie then gently removed the prosthesis. Looking up, she locked her eyes with her wife as she slowly lowered the cotton stocking from Arizona's residual limb.

"You're beautiful," Callie whispered as she placed feather light kisses along the base of the limb. "Scoot back," she gently urged as she stood from her kneeling position to climb onto the bed with her wife.

"I feel like I don't know how to do this anymore," Arizona stuttered as Callie scooted closer to her, deft fingers gently stroking her right thigh.

"Let me help you remember," Callie insisted with a sexy smile, moving to position herself between her wife's legs. Grasping the back of Arizona's head with both hands, the Latina kissed her urgently as she pressed her back into the bed from where she was reclining on her elbows.

Resting her cheek on her wife's chest, Callie kissed and nipped at the soft skin she found there as she squeezed both of her wife's shoulders. Kissing back up the blonde's neck to once again continue her assault on her lips, Callie was encouraged when she heard an eager moan escape her wife's mouth, as she felt the insides of Arizona's thighs squeeze her hips.

Trailing her hands down the sensitive skin of Arizona's sides, Callie then fiercely squeezed her wife's hips as she rocked her pelvis into the blonde's core. "Oh, God. . ." Callie moaned at the contact she had been craving for months. Once again grasping Arizona's shoulders, the Latina pulled her into sitting as she sat back on her knees.

Quickly raising the hem of the Latina's shirt, Arizona urged it up higher and smiled as Callie helped to remove it the rest of the way before reaching behind her to remove her own black lace bra. After staring into her lover's eyes, the blonde hesitated as she looked down toward her lift limb. "Maybe we should. . ."

Kissing the blonde's left temple, Callie husked into her ear. "You're beautiful, baby. Inside and out. . .and I want you _so _badly right now."

Looking back up into her wife's sincere eyes, Arizona immediately captured Callie's already hardened right nipple with her mouth, suckling and laving it with her hot tongue before repeating the actions of her mouth on her wife's left nipple.

"Yes, baby. You feel so good," Callie breathed out as her head fell back on her shoulders. Quickly pulling away from her wife's wandering hands and tongue, Callie stood from the bed, urgently removing her own pants, her eyes never leaving her wife.

Kneeling back down in the middle bed, Callie reached for Arizona and assisted her in turning around to kneel with her back against the Latina's sensitive breasts.

"Callie?" Arizona questioned.

Molding her front to Arizona's back, Callie held her tightly around her waist, pulling her closer as the blonde's left limb rested on top of Callie's with her right knee bent to straddle Callie's legs. Pressing the blonde forward, Callie wrapped a protective arm around her wife's torso, her left hand grasping at her wife's right breast. Arizona shivered as she felt Callie lay wet kisses down her spine before blowing cool air over the moistened area.

Pulling her wife back up to kneel against her, Callie continued to support her body as her left hand continued to squeeze her right breast, her fingers pinching and rolling a pebbled nipple. Desperate to feel her wife, Callie urgently ran her right palm down Arizona's right side. Stopping at the blonde's hip, Callie's questing hand was met by the insistent hand of her wife that guided it down her right thigh then back up, urging Callie's fingers to where she needed them most. Arizona's breath hitched in her throat as Callie cupped her mound with her right hand, the Latina's left hand continuing its assault on her breasts.

"Mmm, so good. . ." Arizona whimpered, throwing her head back onto her wife's shoulder as Callie's middle finger found her throbbing clitoris and began rubbing around it in gentle circles.

Callie kissed Arizona's neck and shoulder and continued to gently rub her clit until her wife's whimpering began to rise in volume. Knowing what Arizona craved, Callie applied more pressure, the blonde's whimpers soon turning into low, helpless moans. Callie rubbed slightly faster and bucked her own hips into her wife's bottom as Arizona involuntarily writhed against her.

Arizona gasped, her back arching into her wife when she felt Callie release her throbbing clit only to plunge two fingers into her heated core. "Oh my God," the blonde moaned as she reached behind her with both hands to grasp Callie's ass, pressing her wife's core more firmly against her own bottom.

As Callie's thrusts became more insistent, she firmly pressed the heel of her hand into her wife's throbbing clit. Hooking her fingers, they collided again and again against the spot only she had been able to discover inside her wife. "Yes, yes! Please don't stop!" Arizona moaned, completely lost in the abyss of pleasure her wife was creating throughout her entire being.

Wrapping her right arm behind her, Arizona grasped the hair at the back of Callie's head, pulling her closer to capture her lips in a searing kiss. Sliding her tongue into her lover's mouth, she felt Callie instantly react to it, returning the kiss with the same intensity as her fingers increased their pace inside her wet core, the Latina's hips rocking more urgently against her ass.

"Oh. . .Callie. . ." Arizona murmured into her wife's mouth. "I'm. . .I'm. . ."

"God, yes. . ." Callie moaned loudly, her own body tensing as an orgasm ripped through her at the same time she felt her wife's internal muscles clench around her fingers. Desperately clinging to the blonde, Callie held her tightly as the blonde's back arched even more, her sweat dampened body shaking fiercely. As the blonde's exhausted but completely sated mind and body began to return from their sex induced high, Callie gently lowered them forward onto the bed.

Rolling onto her side, Arizona kept her eyes closed still unable to completely catch her breath. Panting beside her, Callie faced Arizona, protectively watching her.

"Oh my God I love you!" Arizona finally said as she scooted further into her wife's embrace, her nose nuzzling the Latina's neck.

"Mmmm, me too," Callie replied as she trailed feather light kisses down her wife's jaw line.

"We are _never ever _waiting six months to do that again," Arizona teased, rolling onto her back to look up into her wife's eyes.

Callie returned Arizona's smile before leaning down to place a gentle kiss on her wife's bruised lips. "I love you," she said before again pecking her wife's lips. "I love you." _Peck. _"I love you." _Peck._

Arizona's heated body was quickly cooling and she shivered as Callie ran gentle fingers down her side. "You want your pajamas?" The Latina asked.

"Please. If you don't mind," Arizona replied as she watched her wife's naked body move to the dresser to gather their pajamas.

Once dressed and snuggled under the warm down comforter, Arizona rested her head on Callie's shoulder as the Latina ran her fingers through blonde hair. "What are you thinking about?" Callie whispered into the silence of the room.

"Just wondering what I ever did to deserve you and how lucky I am to have you. You're amazing, Calliope. . ."

"No babe," Callie replied as she tried to stifle a yawn. "We're amazing."

**AN2: **Your continued comments and reviews are greatly appreciated. Have a great weekend!


	9. Chapter 9

**Title:** When It Don't Come Easy

**Author:** HandsThatHeal

**Beta:** Funkyshaz57

**Pairing:** Callie/Arizona

**Rating:** NC-17

**Summary:** After watching Arizona turn away from the people who love her most as she struggles both physically and emotionally to come to terms with the injuries she sustained in the plane crash, Callie decides to take matters into her own hands by embarking on a cross country adventure with Arizona and Sofia in hopes of reaffirming their love for each other and deciding if they have what it takes to carry on as a family.

**Disclaimer:** All television shows, books, movies, songs, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work and the characters, events, and settings thereof are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.

**AN: **Thanks so much for all of your reviews. So glad you seem to be loving this story!

**Chapter 9:**

The following morning, Callie leaned on her elbow, her head in her hand as she stared down at her sleeping wife. Sighing contentedly, she placed a gentle kiss on the top of Arizona's shoulder. Contemplating the events of the past six months, she realized that right then – in that moment – she felt more grounded and secure in their relationship than she had in a very long time. Last night had been amazing – and not just because Arizona had trusted her enough to make love to her again – but more importantly, that she had finally let her in both emotionally and physically. Arizona finally allowed the protective walls she had erected to crumble, fully trusting her wife with the knowledge of the absolute worst and most terrifying event that had ever happened to her.

Well, at least the most terrifying until a couple months later when Callie had been forced to make the decision to either let Arizona die or amputate her infected limb. Callie shuddered at the thought of how _she_ would have reacted had she awakened to find that her own body had been disfigured at the hands of another. What would it be like to wake up unsure of what your life was going to be like? Callie shook her head as she continued to gaze at her wife. In reality, she did know how that felt. She _had_ awakened not all that long ago unsure if she would walk again or stand at an OR table again. Unsure if she would _ever_ have the upper body strength to hold her newborn child.

As unbearable as that time had been, she had eventually healed with few residual long-lasting effects. Sure she still had the surgical scars and sometimes she would guard her left arm when it ached or when it weakened after an exhausting day at the hospital, but none of that compared to the physical and emotional wounds suffered by her wife.

Wounds that Callie blamed herself for.

Wounds that unfortunately were necessary to save Arizona's life.

Callie knew that some of their friends and colleagues condemned Arizona for the way she behaved toward her – and Alex – after the amputation, thinking that Arizona should be nothing but grateful to them for saving her life. While she would be lying if she tried to deny that Arizona's contempt and disregard for her feelings hadn't bruised her, she didn't blame her. She wasn't completely innocent. She wasn't a hero. Arizona was her wife. She had chosen Arizona to be the one with whom she would spend her life and no matter what, that was what she intended to do.

"You only watch me sleep when something's up. . ." Arizona mumbled, slowly opening her eyes.

Callie chuckled, briefly pecking her wife's lips before turning to settle onto her back, a playful grin remaining on her lips.

"You're in a good mood for so early in the morning," Arizona stated, reaching to glance at her phone, noting the time on the display read 7:00am.

"Mmm hmm," Callie replied as she rolled back onto her side to face her wife. Nuzzling her nose against the side of Arizona's face, she nipped at her earlobe. "I got lucky last night."

Arizona smiled contentedly, her thoughts returning to the previous night's events. Rolling onto her side to face her wife, she captured the Latina's full lips with her own. "Mmm. Me too," she replied once she pulled away from Callie's inviting lips. "Any chance we could repeat that again sometime soon?"

Callie laughed, pleased with her wife's train of thought. "Maybe. . ." she teased, shrugging her shoulders.

"Maybe?"

"Yeah, my schedule's kind of insane right now, so I'll get back to you. . ."

Swatting at Callie's right hip, Arizona then rolled on top of her, effectively pinning her to the mattress, both women laughing at the Latina's joke. "You're mean," Arizona admonished, gently smoothing her hand over Callie's tousled hair.

"Yeah, but you love me. . ."

"I do," the blonde admitted honestly, before leaning forward to once again kiss her wife.

Pulling away from her wife's now roaming hands and lips, Callie quickly pecked Arizona's lips before pushing against her, successfully freeing herself to jump up from the bed, the blonde landing back on the mattress with a huff.

"Wha. . ."

"I've got _huge_ plans for us today, babe! I'm _so_ excited. . .this is going to be _so much_ fun," Callie cheered as she quickly moved around the bedroom, opening and closing drawers, grabbing clothes and socks and anything else she might need on her way to the bathroom for a quick shower.

"More fun than me?" Arizona petulantly shouted toward the closed bathroom door, still shocked that her wife had thrown her off of her, effectively denying her advances.

Peeking her head through a crack in the door, Callie laughed. "Not a chance," she teased. "But almost!"

**XXXXXX**

"You're kidding me, right?" Arizona asked, eyebrows rising, a mixture of complete amusement and utter confusion written across her face. Arizona sat at the table assisting Sofia with her breakfast as Callie leaned against the counter top sipping her second cup of coffee.

"It's something I've always wanted to do," Callie defended. "Ever since I was twelve, and we read about it in school. Daddy planned to take me there on vacation the following summer, but my mom and Aria thought it was silly, so we ended up in Spain. . ._again_."

"You're really serious about this. . ."

"Umm. . .yeah?" Callie replied, nervously taking a drink from her coffee mug. Arizona laughed, shaking her head. "What?" Callie huffed. Arizona only continued to laugh, helping Sofia scoop a piece of pancake onto her spoon, choosing to let her wife stew. "What's so funny?" The Latina impatiently urged again.

Wiping the syrup from Sofia's chubby cheeks, Arizona then gathered the toddler's plate and spoon before standing to cross the RV toward Callie. Setting them into the sink, Arizona smirked as she turned toward her wife.

"What?" Callie huffed impatiently.

Choosing her words, Arizona licked her lips. "I just didn't realize I was married to such a nerd."

Callie's mouth fell open as she studied her wife. "Just because I have an interest in history does _not _make me a nerd, Arizona," Callie indignantly replied.

"I'm pretty sure having your own conspiracy theory on the assassination of John F. Kennedy jumps right past _interest_ landing directly on. . ._nerd_," Arizona laughed.

Callie shook her head as she placed her mug in the sink. "That's not funny, Arizona," Callie huffed as she stormed past her wife to take her seat in the driver's seat of the RV. "Buckle Sofia into her car seat. We're leaving."

Arizona pressed her lips together, trying to stifle her amusement. "Callie. . ."

"I'm serious. Let's go."

"Callie, stop it. . .I was just kidding," Arizona said as she stepped closer to her. Grabbing her wife's hand, she pulled the pouting Latina from her seat. "Come on. I'll drive," she stated firmly. "So, you can sight see the grassy knoll or whatever."

Callie's pout turned to a grin as she quickly moved through the cabin of the vehicle to extract Sofia from her highchair before settling her into her car seat. "We don't even have to stop," she said excitedly. "I just want to drive the motorcade route, and then we can leave."

Arizona smiled brightly, but rolled her eyes at her wife's excited ramblings as she turned the key in the ignition. "We can stop if you want," Arizona relented, turning toward her wife who happily plopped into the passenger's seat.

"Nope," Callie said, quickly grabbing the map of downtown Dallas she had stashed in the glove compartment just for the occasion. "I don't need to stop. I just want to drive the route. . .see the school book depository. . ." she paused. Looking from the map toward her clearly amused wife, Callie asked, "You sure you're okay to drive? I can drive if. . ."

"I'll be fine, Calliope," Arizona insisted. "Now where to?"

Callie searched the blonde's face for any sign of insecurity. Finding none, she smiled. "Okay, it's Mockingbird Lane to Lemmon, then Lemmon to Turtle Creek. . .Turtle Creek to Cedar Springs. . ." she paused, pursing her lips in deep thought. "Then, Cedar Springs to Harwood. . .Harwood to Main, Main to Houston. . .Houston to Elm, and then under the Triple Underpass. . ."

Arizona stared at her wife in complete shock, her mouth agape. "Please tell me, you did _not_ just recite that from memory."

Callie blushed. "Umm. . ."

"Calliope Torres, look me in the eye right now and tell me that_ isn't _nerdy," Arizona scoffed.

Opening her mouth to argue, Callie's blush deepened. "Okay," she admonished. "Maybe it's a _little _nerdy. . .or. . .maybe I'm just _incredibly_ intelligent," she tried to recover.

"Uh huh," Arizona teased as she began navigating the RV out of its parking spot. Glancing toward her still self-conscious wife, Arizona smiled. "So. . .tell me about this conspiracy theory of yours," she insisted sympathetically.

"You don't have to pretend to be interested, Arizona," Callie replied, her eyes intent on looking only at the map in front of her.

"Seriously. . .I want to know," Arizona urged, trying to pull her wife from the funk she had fallen back into. "Tell me what you think happened."

Callie looked up from the map toward the side of her wife's face. Smiling when Arizona glanced toward her with a grin on her face, Callie cleared her throat. "Well, the Warren Commission said that there was no conspiracy, but the United States House Select Committee on Assassinations concluded that there was a high probability that two gunmen fired at the President."

"Okay," Arizona nodded, taking in the historical facts that spilled from her wife's lips. "But what does Calliope Torres, JFK conspiracy theorist extraordinaire think?"

Callie laughed. "Well, I think the CIA may have been involved and that there _definitely_ was a second gunman on the grassy knoll. . ."

**XXXXXX**

Several hours later, Arizona sat relaxing on the couch reading an article in the latest volume of the _Journal of Pediatric Surgery_. Callie played on the floor with Sofia, silly children's favorites playing on Callie's iPod over the speakers of the RV.

"Okay, baby. Count with mommy. . ." Callie said, pointing to the blocks they were stacking. "Uno. . .dos. . .tres. . .cuatro. . ." Before Callie could count past four, Sofia stood, slamming her hands into the tower of blocks, successfully knocking them to the floor. "Ooo-kay," Callie laughed. "No Spanish. . .I get it." Arizona smiled at the antics of both her girls from where she sat lounging on the couch.

They sat in comfortable silence for a while longer, Arizona continuing to read as Callie and Sofia concentrated on rebuilding their block tower. When the music changed from _Twinkle, Twinkle_ to _The Grand Old Duke of York_, Sofia started to bounce on her chubby little toddler legs. "Dance, mommy!" Sofia cheered happily. "Dance!"

Kneeling in front of the little girl, Callie took Sofia's hands in hers, bouncing along with her as she animatedly sang along with the music.

"_Oh, the grand old Duke of York,  
He had ten thousand men;  
He marched them up to the top of the hill,  
And he marched them down again.  
And when they were up, they were up,  
And when they were down, they were down,  
And when they were only half way up,  
They were neither up nor down."_

Lowering Sofia to the floor, Callie leaned down to tickle the toddler, blowing loudly against her belly. Sofia's giggles filled the room as her mommy continued to tickle her. "More dance!" She requested through her laughter. Pulling her up from the floor, Callie once again bounced Sofia to the music. "Dance, mamma," Sofia said, turning her attention from Callie and moving toward Arizona on the couch.

Callie watched Arizona's face fall slightly at the child's simple request. "Mamma's busy right now, big girl," Arizona answered briefly. "Maybe later. . ."

"Mamma, dance!"

"Arizona. . ."

"No, Callie, I'm not sure that I can. . ."

"Well, you'll never know if you don't try," the Latina countered, moving closer to the blonde. "It's just us. No one else is around."

"I'm reading, Calliope," Arizona warned. "This is a really interesting article on. . ."

Tugging the journal from her wife's grasp, Callie read, ". . .quality of life after gastric transposition for esophageal atresia. Hmm. . .really? Sounds _so _interesting and _so_. . .fun. Definitely more fun than playing with your daughter."

"Please, Callie, just drop it. . ."

"Come on. Get up. Dance with us," Callie insisted, reaching her hand out for her wife. "I'm here if you need me."

Arizona bit her bottom lip, her resolve vanishing as she moved her gaze between the two brunettes affectionately staring at her. "Okay," she conceded as she stood from her seat. "But, if we're going to do this, we need some better tunes." Stepping toward the iPod dock, Arizona moved her thumb across the touch screen until she came to a playlist that instantly caught her attention. "Callie, what's this?" Arizona asked, grinning mischievously.

"What?" Callie questioned, turning her attention from Sofia to her wife. Realizing what her wife had most likely found, she quickly stepped around Sofia to grab the iPod from Arizona's hand. "Give me that!"

"Oh, no!" Arizona laughed, holding the iPod away from her wife. "We are definitely checking out _these_ songs."

"Haven't you had enough fun at my expense today?" Callie huffed. "Give it to me!"

"Nope. Let's check out what your _My Arizona _playlist has to offer."

"Oh my God. This is ridiculous," Callie pouted. "They're just songs that make me think of you, okay? Though after the crap you've put me through today, I may definitely need to change them. Now give it back to me."

Choosing one of the songs with a flick of her thumb, Arizona stood defiantly in front of the brooding Latina. "Calm down, babe. I think it's cute."

"_Cute_!" Callie scoffed. "Well, I guess that's better than being a _nerd_."

Arizona chuckled. "Alright, come on. You wanted to do this, so let's do this," she said, reaching for Callie's hands as the music began to fill the room.

_Do you want to be my love, my sight, my heart, and my eyes  
My world, my pride, my stars in my skies  
I am looking for a queen who's more than gorgeous on a movie screen  
I am looking for the covergirl of dignified beauty magazine_

Both women started swaying and bouncing to the music as they looked down toward their daughter who was bobbing around to her own beat. Assured that Sofia was alright, Callie turned her attention back to Arizona who still appeared slightly apprehensive. Grasping the blonde's hips for support, Callie encouraged her to move along with her.

_I want dimples, and simple symbols that she's sweet  
Wrinkles her nose, expose what I mean  
I am looking for a four-course meal that isn't based in base desire  
I am looking for a lady that knows the soul is more than an appetizer_

_Just one more thing  
Just one more thing_

Callie smiled as she watched Arizona's reaction to the lyrics, a dimpled smile lighting up her beautiful features. "So cheesy," the blonde laughed, her body moving more freely to the rhythm of the music. _  
_

_Do we fit in the pocket, can we fit sit back in the pocket  
When the dreams and the drums start rocking  
Can we dance with our knees not knocking, knocking  
See I, I want a lady I can put stock in  
I want a bass and backbeat to lock in  
I want to know real love's not forgotten_

During the musical break, Callie spun Arizona around still firmly grasping her hips. When the lyrics began again, Arizona raised her arms in the air, swaying and moving them to the beat. _  
_

_I want a teacher who's eager to speak her mind  
Delicate features, sweet with her tongue so kind  
I am looking for the markers that say "permanent" so we can share  
I am looking for a love that's still alive and well in rocking chairs  
I want faithful, and stable, able  
Beauty that moves me, improves my soul_

_I am looking for a shining light that likes to fight and persevere_  
_I am looking for a lady that wants to make me part of her atmosphere_

_And oh, just one more thing_  
_Oh, just one more thing_

_Do we fit in the pocket, can we fit sit back in the pocket_  
_When the dreams and the drums start rocking_  
_Can we dance with our knees not knocking, knocking_  
_See I, I want a lady I can put stock in_  
_I want a bass and backbeat to lock in_  
_I want to know real love's not forgotten_

_All I need to know is_

_All I need to know is_

_All I need to know is_

By this point in the song, both women were dancing freely around the other, reminiscent of the first night they had danced together in Callie's apartment. Leaning in toward her wife, Callie winked at her, a seductive smile gracing her lips. Arizona returned the smile, unconsciously licking her lips as she watched Callie's breasts bounce as she moved to the music. _  
_

_Are you clear on who you are  
Do you love it?  
When this world starts getting hard  
We rise above it, rise above it  
_

Callie picked up Sofia, swaying with her, as she pulled Arizona closer. All three dancing and smiling happily. _  
_

_In the pocket  
Can we fix it back in the pocket  
When the dreams and the drums start rocking  
Can we dance with our knees not knocking, knocking  
See I, I want a lady I can put stock in  
I want a base and backbeat to lock in  
I want to know real love's not forgotten_

_I said the pocket_  
_Can we fit sit back in the pocket_  
_When the dreams and the drums start rocking_  
_Can we dance with our knees not knocking, knocking_  
_See I, I want a lady I can put stock in_  
_I want a base and backbeat to lock in_  
_I want to know real love's not forgotten_

**XXXXXX**

Reaching for the long-handled nozzle in the shower, Arizona pulled it toward her, wetting her hair and body with the warm water as she sat on a bench in the shower. Hearing the bathroom door open, she smiled. "Sofia asleep?"

"Yep, all the dancing must have really tired her out," Callie replied.

Hearing the door to the shower stall open, Arizona turned to see her wife stepping in to join her. "What are you doing?" She asked, a sheepish grin on her face.

"Well," Callie began, stepping behind her and taking the shower spray from her hand. "This morning you requested a repeat of last night, so. . .I thought I should be a good wife and take care of that request for you," Callie teased as she ran her fingers through Arizona's now damp hair. Placing the hose back in its holder, Callie reached for Arizona's shampoo, pouring a liberal amount into the palm of her hand in order to wash her wife's long blonde locks.

"Mmmm," Arizona moaned as Callie's strong fingers massaged her scalp. Reaching for the spray, the Latina took care in rinsing all of the shampoo from her wife's hair. Moving to the blonde's front, Callie knelt in front of her, positioning herself between her damp thighs.

Spraying warm water over her wife's front, Callie followed several of the water droplets with her mouth, placing hot kisses from Arizona's neck, down her chest, landing over an already erect right nipple. Taking the hardened bud into her mouth, Callie moaned when she felt Arizona's thighs tighten around her. Moving to flick her tongue around the blonde's other nipple, Callie squeezed her wife's hips, pulling her closer to her.

"Mmm, baby, that feels so good," Arizona urged.

Pleased with her wife's response, Callie continued her mouth's journey, dipping her tongue into Arizona's navel several times before continuing south. Pulling Arizona's right leg to rest on her shoulder, Callie pushed her wife's thighs further apart, parting her labia with gentle fingers. Arizona's body clenched when she felt the tip of a hot tongue flick against her swollen clit. As the assault on her aroused bundle of nerves continued, her whole world seemed to spin as she rested her head against the wall of the shower, her hips involuntarily bucking against Callie's face.

"Oh God, Callie! Please. . .more. . .please. . ."

Callie smiled against her wife's core as she tightened her grip on her hips, pulling her more firmly against her tongue and mouth. Running her tongue up and down the inside of Arizona's wet labia, Callie teased her opening with the tip of her tongue before once again flicking it over her engorged clit as she began to suck. As Callie sucked harder and harder, Arizona sensually locked her thighs around her wife's neck, unable to control the urgency in the writhing of her hips. Grabbing the hair at the back of the Latina's head, Arizona tugged it gently with both hands.

"Right there. More. . .Callie. Right there," Arizona moaned as Callie moved her tongue a little to the left of her clit, exactly the way she liked it. Sensing that Arizona was close, Callie dove in further, savoring her wife's sex.

"Oh God! Mmmmm. . ." Arizona gasped and then moaned as she felt an explosion deep inside her which flooded her entire body with pleasure. The blonde grasped her wife's head tight against her as wave after wave coursed through her body. Just as she expected it to fade, another orgasm started to build, Callie continuing to work her magic. "Callie," Arizona gasped as a second orgasm washed over her.

Slumping against the shower wall, Arizona's arms limply fell to her sides, her body completely relaxed with pure fulfillment. Kissing her way back up her wife's body, Callie quickly captured Arizona's lips with hers in a gentle and loving kiss. Pulling away after several long moments, Callie stared into her wife's dazed eyes. Smirking at her own handiwork, the Latina stood before once again leaning forward to peck her wife's lips. Stepping from the shower stall, she grabbed a towel to wrap around her damp body.

Grinning at her wife who still wore a stupefied look on her face, Callie peeked her head back into the door of the shower stall. "Go ahead and finish your shower, babe. I'll be waiting for you out here," she stated suggestively as she seductively sauntered out the bathroom door.

**AN2: **The songs in this chapter were _The Grand Old Duke of York _which is an English children's nursery rhyme and the other was _The Pocket_ by Andy Grammer. Check them out! Also, I'm totally not bashing the history buffs of the world – I happen to be one of them!

**AN3: **Your continued reviews and comments are greatly appreciated. Thanks and have a great week!


	10. Chapter 10

**Title:** When It Don't Come Easy

**Author:** HandsThatHeal

**Beta:** Funkyshaz57

**Pairing:** Callie/Arizona

**Rating:** NC-17

Summary: After watching Arizona turn away from the people who love her most as she struggles both physically and emotionally to come to terms with the injuries she sustained in the plane crash, Callie decides to take matters into her own hands by embarking on a cross country adventure with Arizona and Sofia in hopes of reaffirming their love for each other and deciding if they have what it takes to carry on as a family.

Disclaimer: All television shows, books, movies, songs, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work and the characters, events, and settings thereof are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.

**AN: **So glad you liked the previous two chapters. Thanks again for continuing to read and review! And. . .as always. . .many thanks to my awesome Beta!

* * *

**Chapter 10:**

_The flight should have lasted less than one hour and thirty minutes. The first two hours passed by uneventfully, but. . . _

_At some point during the final minutes of the flight. . .they flew into heavy clouds, causing the small aircraft to shake. _

_The engine noise changed. Distinctly. Were they running out of gas? _

_The engine continued to lose power. Their altitude was slipping. _

_The plane started to roll from side to side. A second later, she felt a powerful jolt like they had been hit from behind. The aircraft started lurching and bumping in the air. _

_They continued to descend as she peered to the left out the window. She could see the top of a thick canopy of trees. The next thing she knew, they were falling through the air as the plane went into a nosedive. _

_Falling head first with the seatbelt digging into her stomach, the engine suddenly roared back to life. _

_Too late. _

_The tail hit first. The plane's left wing clipped the tree tops, sending the damaged airliner into a tumble of death. _

_The airplane sheared off the tops of Hemlock, Red Cedar, Aspen, and Birch, leaving a half-mile-long trail of wreckage, luggage, and surgical notes. The plane somersaulted, the windows shattered._

"Callie!" Arizona screamed into the silence of their bedroom as she jolted up in bed covered in sweat, her heart racing. Her arms flailed to her sides, stopping only when the back of her right hand came into contact with the smoothness of her wife's face.

Instantly jerked from sleep by the sudden harsh impact to her cheek and nose, Callie quickly sat up, confusion flooding her mind and body as she surveyed her surroundings. Taking in the sight of Arizona gasping and gulping for air as she clutched her chest, her body trembling, Callie slowly moved across the bed, trying not to startle her wife any further.

"Arizona," Callie tried to sooth as she knelt beside her on the bed. "I'm here," she continued, reaching a tentative hand to rest against Arizona's right cheek. "I'm here. You're safe."

Arizona's body flooded with the chemicals of fight or flight, her mind unable to concentrate. Her eyes remained unfocused. She was in danger and she needed to take action. Unable to fight the overwhelming urge to run away, she swatted Callie's hand away from her face, her right leg kicking furiously at her wife. Arizona felt completely detached from her surroundings, completely detached from her own body.

"Look at me, Arizona. You're safe, baby. I'm here. You're okay."

"No. . .no. . .no!" Arizona screamed jerking her body violently from side to side when Callie tried to pull her into her arms. "Get off of me!"

"Arizona!" Callie slightly raised her voice making sure the blonde could hear her, but her tone remained calm. "I understand you're scared. It's okay. It's okay to be scared, and I'm here to help."

Arizona's eyes darted back and forth, her chest aching. Ripping the covers from her body, she turned from Callie. Moving with the terrified blonde, Callie reached her left hand out to gently stroke her wife's back, her right hand rubbing circles over the blonde's right thigh. "I'm here, Arizona. You're safe. It's okay to be scared. I'm here to help you," Callie repeated the mantra over and over into Arizona's ear.

Arizona took deep staggering breaths, trying desperately to calm her racing heart. "Oh, God," she moaned as she rocked forward, her trembling hands grasping her middle. "I'm going to be sick."

Reacting quickly, Callie jumped from the bed, grabbing a small trash can from beside the night stand on Arizona's side of the bed. Climbing back onto the bed, Callie settled herself behind her wife, legs outstretched on either side of the blonde as she assisted her in holding the waste basket.

As the bile rose in the back of her throat, Arizona lurched forward emptying the contents of her stomach into the trash can over and over again as Callie continued to hold her tightly, smoothing the sweat damp hair back from her head.

When the violent spasms of her Arizona's stomach finally seemed to calm, Callie leaned forward to kiss her left temple. "You okay to sit here?" She asked softly. "I'm going to get you some water."

All Arizona could manage was a slight nod, her body completely drained of energy. Returning from the bathroom, Callie handed her a cup of cool water before running a tepid washcloth over her forehead and face. "That was a bad one," she commented softly.

Arizona closed her eyes, nodding her head in agreement. When she opened her eyes again, she stared into the deep brown eyes of her wife. Mistaking the concern she found there for pity and disappointment, Arizona's body once again filled with adrenaline as she quickly stood from the bed, stumbling to find her crutches. "I. . .I have to go. I have to get out of here," she insisted as she hopped toward the door.

"What? Where are you going?" Callie asked, quickly standing from the bed. "Arizona, it's okay. Please. . .just stay."

Not deterred, Arizona adamantly continued through the bedroom door without even pausing at the sound of her wife's pleas as she made her way toward the door to exit the RV.

**XXXXXX **

Twenty minutes later, Arizona heard the door of the vehicle open from where she sat in a lawn chair beside the RV. "You're smoking?" Callie chided as she took a seat on the entrance steps of the vehicle.

Arizona closed her eyes, shaking her head ruefully. "I'm on like cigarette number five from the same pack I bought three months ago. All things considered, I think that's pretty damn good."

Callie took a long swallow of the beer she had grabbed from the refrigerator on her way to find her wife. Handing the bottle to Arizona, she smiled when the blonde accepted it, before flicking the cigarette in her other hand to the ground, extinguishing the flame with the toe of her shoe.

They sat in silence for several long moments before either spoke. "I'm here for you, Arizona," Callie commented, unsure of what else to say.

"I know. . ."

"I'm not going to leave you just because you get scared. . .or get mad and try to push me away."

"I know. . .I. . .I just can't shut off my brain. And I feel like I've ruined a wonderful few days. I feel so embarrassed and so. . .so guilty. . ."

"Arizona, you haven't ruined anything, and you certainly have nothing to feel embarrassed or guilty about," Callie asserted. "Well, other than punching me in the face," she teased, dramatically rubbing her cheek, trying to lighten the mood.

Arizona huffed, rolling her eyes as she took a long drink from the cold bottle of Beck's Light. "I think about the plane crash every day, Callie. I don't want to, but it's kind of hard not to think about it when I. . .look at myself," Arizona admitted, taking another drink from the bottle before handing it back to her wife.

Reaching out, Callie took the beer before pulling Arizona's chair closer to her. "Do you know what I see when I look at you?" The Latina asked, pushing stray blonde hair behind her wife's ear.

"A hot mess?" Arizona quickly answered, instantly wishing she hadn't already put out her cigarette.

"No," Callie chuckled softly. "I see my wife. I see an intelligent. . .strong. . .beautiful woman whose presence lights up my day. I see a wonderful person who has suffered so much, but has only become more magnificent because of it."

"Callie. . ."

"I'm serious, sweetie. I love you, and I'm here for you," Callie replied sincerely. "But, please stop running from me, Arizona," she continued. "We've come so far. Please don't put up those walls again. Don't shut me out. Please promise me that no matter what, from now on, you won't run. Please. . ."

"I'm sorry, Callie. I'm trying. . ." she stated with a sigh. "I'm just so used to being the strong one. I have a hard time leaning on others. . .you know that," Arizona continued honestly. "But, I'll try. I'll try not to run. I promise."

"Thank you," Callie nodded, leaning forward to briefly kiss her wife's chilled lips. The Latina smiled as she stood from her seat. "Come on," she said, reaching for her wife's hand. "You need to brush your teeth because you taste a little like vomit and an ash tray," she joked. "And my ass is freezing sitting on this step."

**XXXXXX**

As exhausted and emotionally drained as she was, sleep eluded Callie's tired body and over-active mind. Watching Arizona sleep, Callie sighed. That nightmare really had been a bad one. At the start of their trip, the nightmares seemed to happen every couple nights, which was a vast improvement to the weeks immediately following the crash and subsequent amputation, but they had decreased in number and intensity even further over the past two weeks.

Thinking back, Callie was sure Arizona hadn't fallen victim to the terrible visions in her mind for close to a week and a half – a couple days before visiting Teddy – with her last panic attack occurring just four days into the trip.

Grabbing her phone from the night stand, Callie noted that it was 5:15am, just two hours after finally settling Arizona back into their bed to rest. Conceding to the fact that she wasn't going to get anymore sleep, Callie gently laid her lips against Arizona's temple before rolling off the bed. Throwing a sweatshirt on over her pajama clad body, she quietly exited the bedroom, pulling the door shut with a gentle click.

Crossing the cabin of the vehicle, she decided against starting a pot of coffee, but instead grabbed a copy of _Us Weekly_ from near the passenger's seat. Settling onto the couch, Callie pulled a blanket from the back cushions to cover her lower body. Studying the magazine cover, she sighed, hopeful that reading mindless gossip about Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes or Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart would lull her distressed mind to sleep.

Fifteen minutes and two articles about Kim Kardashian's wardrobe and Angelina's parenting techniques later, Callie gave up. Tossing the magazine to the floor, she worried her bottom lip between her teeth.

Arizona's panicked screams. . .

Callie was wholly unable to disregard them as they continued to echo through her troubled mind hours later.

Callie Torres wasn't easily scared. She considered herself pretty bad ass, but those screams. . .

The sheer terror present in Arizona's words. . .

The unparalleled fear filling her glazed blue eyes. . .

The absolute horror masking every feature of her beautiful face. . .

The stress evident in her rigid form as she relived falling through the sky and suffering for four very long days in the cold imposing forest. . .

All of that was enough to rock even the strongest person to their very core.

Callie shook her head. Sometimes it was just too much to handle. Witnessing Arizona continuously fight her internal demons was horribly unbearable at times. She would continue to support her wife, but this time – this nightmare had totally blindsided her. Though she had been on high alert for several months, she was completely taken by surprise this time when her dazed mind was able to register what was happening.

She had begun to let down her guard.

Arizona seemed to be doing so well.

They seemed to be making such amazing progress.

The Latina internally scolded herself for becoming so complacent. She was a doctor. She knew the statistics. She knew that very few people were ever completely able to rid themselves of the nightmares and panic attacks that often followed such a traumatic experience.

"Damn it," Callie whispered into the quiet of the vehicle.

This had to be her fault.

She had to have done something to trigger this episode for her wife.

But, what?

Callie had no idea.

Closing her eyes, she thought back over the past week, desperately searching the recesses of her mind for some reason – for some catalyst.

Callie jumped slightly when she felt the cushions beneath her shift. Opening her eyes, she stared in to the concerned blue eyes of her wife who sat near her on the edge of the couch.

"You okay?" Arizona tentatively asked.

"I'm sorry. Did I wake you?" Callie replied guiltily, immediately sitting up straighter, purposely ignoring her wife's question.

Arizona shook her head in response. "What were you thinking about?"

"Let's get you back to bed," Callie hastily urged, more concerned for her wife's comfort than the thoughts racing through her tormented mind.

"Callie. . ."

"Come on," Callie stated as she swung her feet from behind her wife, standing quickly in an effort to ignore this situation and guide them back to their bedroom.

"No, Calliope," Arizona retorted. "We're not going anywhere until you tell me what's going on with you."

"Nothing's going on, Arizona," Callie countered. "I just couldn't sleep."

"You're lying," Arizona answered reproachfully. "If I don't get to run, neither do you."

"It's nothing, Arizona. . ."

"I'm not fragile, Callie," Arizona retorted before pausing to consider her words. "Well, I know sometimes. . .lately. . .I may seem that way, but. . .I'm getting better. I'm so much stronger that I was. I'm not going to break. Please don't start walking on egg shells around me again, just because I had a nightmare. Not when we've come this far. . ."

Callie slowly sat back down next to her wife, the irony of the situation no escaping her. Hadn't she spoken similar words to Arizona just hours before? Searching the blonde's eyes, Callie sighed. "I wasn't on the plane, Arizona. I didn't have my leg amputated."

Arizona momentarily flinched at the candor in her wife's words. "No. . ." Arizona began. "But, you were affected. . ._greatly_. No one else involved – who wasn't a passenger on that flight – has suffered as much as you. I'm here for you, Callie. Just like you are for me."

Callie sat silently, not wanting to project her own guilt and fears onto her already burdened wife. "You're strong, Callie. I know that, but please. . .please let me be here for you, again. We can be strong for each other."

"I think we should go home," Callie finally admitted after several long moments of silence.

"What?" Arizona asked incredulously.

"I think I fucked up, Arizona. I think we should go home."

"What are you talking about?"

Callie again stood from her seat, crossing toward the kitchen counter. Slowly turning to face her confused wife, Callie grasped the countertop behind her. "I thought I could do this on my own. I thought this trip would be exactly what we needed to move past all of this. I thought this was what you, Sofia, and I needed to be happy again. . .but I think. . .I think I was wrong."

Arizona's face fell. She _was_ happy. She was having a wonderful time spending every single day, uninterrupted by surgeries, and pagers, and PT appointments, with her wife and daughter. Callie had gotten her to open up. She had made her feel sexy and wanted again. Callie had made hot, passionate love to her for the first time in months. How could Callie think that this was wrong?

"I think I should take you home so you can start seeing Dr. Wyatt again," Callie stated, looking to the floor. "Being a doctor, I thought I would know what to do to help you through the nightmares and anxiety attacks, but as your wife. . ." Callie trailed off, shaking her head. "I thought Sofia and I would be enough, but I was so. . .so stupid."

"Callie. . ."

"I'm sorry," the Latina replied as she wiped a single tear from her cheek. "I forced you to come with me. I interrupted your sessions with Dr. Wyatt. You were getting better, but I was selfish, and I wanted you better. . .I wanted you back. . .faster. I thought I. . ." Callie trailed off, lowering her head.

Reaching for her crutches, Arizona stood, before hopping toward her wife. Stepping in front of her, the blonde cleared her throat. "I haven't seen Dr. Wyatt in months, Callie," she softly admitted.

Callie immediately raised her eyes to look at her wife. "What?"

"I only went to two sessions, but I just couldn't take it. I couldn't sit there and talk to her. I wasn't ready. . .so. . .I stopped going," the blonde reluctantly stated.

"Arizona. . ."

"I know. . .I should have told you, but I didn't know what to say. That was such a terrible time, Callie. I didn't know what to do."

They stood staring at each other, uncomfortable silence filling the room. "Don't be mad," Arizona requested shyly.

"I'm not _mad_. . .a little _shocked_. A little upset that you lied to me. . ."

"I'm sorry," Arizona stated. "But this," Arizona gestured between the two of them. "This progress we've made. . .we've done it together. This trip has been more therapeutic than any session with Dr. Wyatt ever could be. I'm gaining confidence and trying things I was afraid to. _Dancing_. Talking with you about my thoughts and fears. We're _getting it on_ again. . ." Arizona chuckled, a sexy smile gracing her lips. "I'm getting better, Callie. . .all because of you."

A slight smile broke onto the Latina's face upon hearing Arizona's admission. "Really?" She asked shyly.

"Yes," Arizona quickly answered. "This is exactly what I. . .what we needed. Please don't ever doubt that."

Callie's heart swelled with love and pride. Leaning forward, she instantly captured her wife's lips in a searing kiss. Feeling Arizona stumble briefly at the force of the kiss, the Latina immediately grasped her hips, pulling her into her body. "I love you so much, Arizona," Callie whispered as she pulled back from her wife's bruised lips.

"I love you, too, babe," Arizona responded. "More than anything," she continued. Quickly pecking her wife's full lips once again, Arizona then turned, moving back toward the bedroom. "Let's go," she insisted as she turned back toward Callie. "We can sleep a little longer before Sofia wakes up. Or. . . if we're lucky and Sofia cooperates, if you'd like, maybe we could. . ." Arizona trailed off, a suggestive grin on her face.

"Oh, I would definitely _like. . ."_

**XXXXXX**

"Yes, mom," Arizona said from the passenger's seat, her phone resting between her shoulder and ear as she struggled with the GPS in her hands. "We're leaving St. Louis right now. . ."

"_We're so happy your coming, Arizona. I found Sofia the cutest little dress for Thanksgiving dinner. . ."_

"Mom. . ."

"_It has a turkey embroidered on the front of it. With her dark hair and skin. . .she's going to look so adorable."_

"Mom. . ."

"_Your father says Callie has to make the stuffing. Apparently, mine is too dry."_

"Mom. . ." Arizona raised her voice, trying to halt her mother's ramblings. Placing the GPS back on the dash, she looked toward Callie who continued to drive, a knowing smirk on her face.

"_When will you be here? I have the guest room ready for you and Callie. . .or. . .if you have trouble making it up the stairs. . ."_

"Mom. . .I'm just going to stop you right there," Arizona interrupted, trying to hold back her irritation. "I can walk up stairs, mother. You don't have to make any special accommodations for me. I'm not handicapped. . ."

Callie's gaze immediately darted from the road toward her wife. Relieved when she saw more amused irritation than sadness or fear, she sent her wife a sympathetic smile.

"_That's not what I mean, Arizona. I just want you to be comfortable."_

Quickly changing the subject, Arizona replied, "Like I was _trying_ to say. . .we are leaving St. Louis right now. We plan on spending a couple days in Chicago, then a couple days in Niagara Falls. We should be in Rhode Island by the 17th or 18th."

"_That's more than a week away, Arizona," _Barbara seemed displeased.

"Thanksgiving isn't until the 22nd. . ." Arizona countered. ". . .and if you and dad wouldn't have moved further away because he decided to come out of retirement to teach at the Naval War College, we would have been there sooner."

"_Arizona. . ."_

"I'm just saying, mom. We'll be there_ way_ before Thanksgiving." There was nothing but silence from the other end of the line before Arizona finally heard her mother speak.

"_Okay, sweetheart," _Barbara conceded. _"Give Callie and Sofia our love."_

"I will, mom."

"_Love you, Arizona."_

"Love you, too."

Arizona flicked her thumb across the screen of her phone, ending her call. Blowing out a flustered breath, she leaned her head back against the seat, her eyes closed. "Maybe we should spend Thanksgiving with your parents instead," Arizona suggested.

"Ha!" Callie spat. "Yeah right," she chuckled.

"She's going to drive me insane."

Callie eyed her wife compassionately. "She's just concerned, sweetie. She loves you. _So _many people love you and want the best for you."

"Oh yeah? Who?" Arizona teased.

"Hmm, let me think," Callie played along. "Well, there was that hot brunette nurse in San Antonio. . ."

* * *

**AN: **As always, reviews and comments are most welcome!


	11. Chapter 11

**Title:** When It Don't Come Easy

**Author:** HandsThatHeal

**Beta:** Funkyshaz57

**Pairing:** Callie/Arizona

**Rating:** NC-17

Summary: After watching Arizona turn away from the people who love her most as she struggles both physically and emotionally to come to terms with the injuries she sustained in the plane crash, Callie decides to take matters into her own hands by embarking on a cross country adventure with Arizona and Sofia in hopes of reaffirming their love for each other and deciding if they have what it takes to carry on as a family.

Disclaimer: All television shows, books, movies, songs, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work and the characters, events, and settings thereof are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.

**AN: **Once again, thank you so much for your continued reviews as this story progresses.

**AN2: **AND. . .as always, a huge thank you to my wonderful Beta.

* * *

**Chapter 11:**

"You're sure you don't want to come?"

"Yeah. . .if you don't mind, I think I'll just stay here and catch up on some emails. . .maybe check in with Karev. . ." Arizona replied as she watched Callie pack Sofia's bag for their day out.

Looking up from the bag, Callie searched her wife's face. "You okay?" She asked suspiciously.

"Yes, Calliope. I'm fine," Arizona assured her. "If you take Sofia to _Airtastic_ today, I promise all three of us will go to the Aquarium and the Children's Museum tomorrow."

Callie continued to study her wife for any hint of why she had decided to stay in for the day instead of joining them. "And you're sure you're okay?" She asked again.

"I'm sure," Arizona replied.

Gathering Sofia and her bag, Callie finally conceded. "Okay," she said. Moving toward the door, she turned back to her wife. "You're sure?"

"Callie. . ." Arizona huffed, irritation beginning to creep into her voice.

Turning her attention to Sofia, Callie joked, "I don't know, baby girl. You think mamma's being weird? Yeah, me too. . ."

"I'm not being weird," Arizona countered. "There's nothing wrong with me staying in for the day."

Callie wasn't completely convinced, but leaned forward to kiss her wife goodbye. Pulling away, she said, "We'll be back in a few hours."

"Okay," Arizona nodded. "I'll see you when you get back."

Exiting the RV, Callie walked the short distance toward the rental car they had for their few days in Chicago. "You're sure you're okay?" She asked one final time after buckling Sofia safely into her car seat.

"Callie!"

"Okay, okay," the Latina replied as she winked at her wife. "Love you," she called before settling herself into the car.

**XXXXXX**

Several hours later, a thump against the RV door pulled Arizona's attention away from the boiling pot on the kitchen stove. "Just a second," she called as she wiped her hands on a kitchen towel. Crossing the vehicle, she peeked out the window, a smile gracing her face at the sight before her. Quickly opening the door, she laughed. "What's all of this?" She questioned.

Callie stood at the bottom of the steps, a very asleep Sofia in one arm, her chubby toddler arms slung haphazardly here and there, several shopping bags, her purse, and Sofia's bag hanging from her other arm. "Can you take a couple bags?" Callie asked, shifting her weight to keep from dropping her heavy load.

"Oh, yeah, sorry," Arizona answered as she quickly grabbed some shopping bags from her wife's grasp.

"Sofia needed diapers and those apple cinnamon puffs she likes," Callie stated as she ascended the stairs. "So, then I just decided to get some stuff to make for. . ." Callie paused, looking around the RV. "Arizona?" She questioned, a smile curling at her lips. "What. . .what's all this?"

Arizona turned back toward her wife after depositing the shopping bags onto the table. "Well, I just wanted to show you how much I appreciate what you've done lately. This trip has been wonderful, and. . .I just wanted to thank you," she replied as she stepped back toward her wife to take the rest of the bags. "It's nothing extravagant. Just grilled chicken, some brown rice, and a garden salad. . ."

Callie looked around the cabin of the RV. She noted two candles lit on the dining table along with several others setting along the countertop, the lights dimmed, and soft music from her _My Arizona_ playlist playing in the background. "You're pretty fond of that playlist, aren't you?" Callie chuckled.

"Eh. . .it's not bad," Arizona teased. "I thought we could put Sofia to bed and then enjoy a nice quiet dinner together," the blonde explained. "The putting Sofia to bed part seems to already be taken care of, though. . ."

"Yeah. She seriously played her little ass off today," Callie replied with a grin. "She fell asleep as soon as we left the store."

Arizona stepped toward her wife and daughter, gently smoothing the dark hair from Sofia's face where her cheek rested against Callie's shoulder. Kissing her tenderly on her forehead, she smiled. "Why don't you go put her down. . .I'll put away the groceries and then we can eat."

Callie smiled. "Sounds good," she replied. "I'll be right back."

**XXXXXX**

"Mmm, Arizona," Callie moaned as the blonde harshly pushed her up against their bedroom door.

Dinner had been excellent and was followed by Arizona laughing hysterically as Callie retold the story of Sofia's antics in the various bounce houses she had played in earlier that day. Sharing a bottle of Callie's favorite Pinot Noir, their conversation flowed easily as they flirted shamelessly.

Callie had been completely unable to deny the advances of her wife as she pulled her from her seat and pushed her backward into their bedroom. The Latina wasn't sure if it was the wine they had consumed, or perhaps the self-confidence Arizona had recently rediscovered, but she _was_ sure that Arizona taking charge – Arizona pushing and being the one to guide their love making – felt _frickin' amazing._

"God, I need you," Arizona panted as she tugged Callie's shirt over her head. "You're so damn hot."

Callie leaned forward to capture Arizona's lips as the blonde's hands snaked behind her to remove the deep purple bra she was wearing. Freeing heavy breasts from their confinement, Arizona quickly devoured Callie's right nipple, pleasuring it with her tongue and lips as she pinched and rolled the other hardened bud between her thumb and forefinger.

"Oh, God," Callie groaned, throwing her head back against the door. "Mmm. . .that feels so good."

Arizona continued her descent down Callie's body, dipping her tongue into her navel before teasing the skin above the waistband of the Latina's jeans with her tongue. Pulling the button of her jeans through the button hole, Arizona started to kneel in from of her wife in order to continue her ministrations, but halted when she suddenly began to lose her balance. "Shit," she hissed, grabbing Callie's hips to keep from toppling to the floor. "Damn it."

As her wife's curses filtered into her dazed mind, Callie's eyes snapped open, immediately jerking her back to reality from the abyss of pleasure and excitement she had quickly tumbled into. Looking down toward her wife whose forehead now rested against the waistband of her jeans, Callie bit her bottom lip, unsure of how to proceed. Reaching a hand under each of the blonde's arms, Callie pulled her back up into standing from the awkward position she had assumed.

When Arizona refused to meet her gaze, Callie gently grabbed her chin, forcing her to look into her eyes. "We're just going to try something different," Callie stated simply, refusing to allow this minor setback to ruin their evening by overwhelming Arizona's psyche.

"Callie. . ."

"I _said_. . .we're just going to try something _different_," Callie repeated more firmly as she pressed her body forward, taking Arizona's lips into a passionate kiss. Grabbing at the hem of the blonde's t-shirt to brusquely pull it over her head, Callie then palmed Arizona's bra clad breasts, pleased when she felt her wife's body begin to relax once again. Stepping forward, the Latina urged Arizona backward toward the bed. Surprised when the blonde unexpectedly turned their bodies, Callie was unable to stop the gasp that emanated from her mouth as Arizona abruptly pushed her onto the bed.

Reclining on her elbows, Callie scooted back toward the center of the bed and smirked seductively as she watched her wife remove her own navy blue satin bra. Licking her lips hungrily, Callie allowed her eyes to scan from her wife's erect nipples down toward the yoga pants that covered her hips before quickly moving back up to her darkened blue eyes. "Like what you see?" Arizona asked sexily as she stalked toward her wife, crawling onto the bed in search of her prey.

"Definitely," was all Callie could reply before Arizona captured her lips with her own, pulling both of their bodies down onto the bed to rest on their sides facing each other. Leaning up onto her left elbow, Callie pushed Arizona onto her back, hovering over her momentarily before sticking out the tip of her tongue to trace her wife's lips. Chuckling when Arizona nipped at it with her teeth, Callie then pressed her lips firmly to her wife's, her tongue invading the blonde's mouth as her right hand massaged a bare breast.

Arizona soon grasped Callie's wandering hand, guiding it past the waistband of her pants toward the wet heat that radiated from her center. Urging the Latina's hand to apply pressure to the wanton area, Arizona gasped when Callie's index finger found her erect clit through the barrier of her pants and panties.

Hopping up onto her knees at the side of her wife, Callie continued to kiss Arizona as her fingers applied steady pressure to her pulsing bundle of nerves. Moving her hand to her wife's hip, the Latina sat back onto her knees as she hooked both hands into the elastic band of Arizona's black yoga pants, pulling them down her legs. Once they were discarded, Callie's fingers slipped into the waistband and gently tugged the navy blue panties down Arizona's thighs, stopping momentarily when the elastic caught on the metal of the prosthetic knee joint. Quickly recovering, Callie untangled the satin material as she proceeded to remove them the rest of the way down her wife's legs.

Kneeling with her thighs slightly parted, Callie gazed hungrily upon Arizona's naked form, feeling a growing dampness between her own legs. Neither spoke or moved for several seconds until Arizona noticed Callie's breathing become more rapid. Sitting up, the blonde immediately grasped her wife's sides, drawing her breasts closer to her face. Grasping Callie's right breast, Arizona teased the erect nipple with her tongue before moving to pay the same attention to her wife's left breast.

Running her left palm down Callie's stomach, Arizona pulled down the zipper of her wife's jeans. Snaking her hand into the front of Callie's pants, Arizona ran her middle finger through the Latina's moist folds. Moaning at the contact, Callie threw her head back on her shoulder, spreading her legs further as her wife continued to stroke her aching clit.

Realizing her wife's need to be in control, Callie immediately obeyed when Arizona urged her to lie down on her back, groaning when the blonde removed her hand from between her legs. Pulling jeans along with the Latina's deep purple panties down her long tanned legs, the blonde attempted to position herself between her wife's thighs once the jeans had been thrown off the side of the bed.

Arizona groaned in frustration as the weight of her prosthesis prevented her from moving into the position she desired. "My God. . .this is ridiculous," she muttered as she quickly sat back against the head of the bed. Sitting up to face her wife, Callie remained quiet as she watched her wife obstinately attempt to regain her composure.

Callie recognized Arizona's need to command this encounter and be dominant in this situation, so she patiently leaned back onto her elbows, allowing her wife a moment to gather herself and process her next move. After a few moments, Callie smiled slightly when Arizona leaned forward, her decision seemingly made. Pulling off the prosthesis, the blonde guided it to the floor before removing the sleeve from her residual limb. Taking a deep breath to settle her mind, Arizona turned back toward her wife. "Okay," she tentatively breathed out. "Where were we?"

Reaching out her arms, Callie beckoned Arizona toward her, smiling seductively when the blonde straddled her left thigh. Pressing forward, Arizona rested her body firmly onto her wife, gasping when her nipples brushed against Callie's. Sucking the Latina's bottom lip between her own, Arizona pressed up on her arms and right knee as she continued to assault Callie's full lips.

Pulling back, she gazed down the Latina's body, wanting to touch her more intimately – wanting to bring wave after wave of pleasure to her gorgeous wife. Arizona couldn't remember the last time she felt such a longing to indulge in her desires, so she quickly leaning forward supporting her body with her elbows and forearms, eagerly sucking and teasing her wife's breasts. "Oh, God," Callie moaned at her wife's fervor, arching her back, seeking the friction she desperately needed.

Pulling Arizona up to kiss her awaiting lips, Callie reached down to wrap her arms tightly around her wife, her fingers cupping her firm ass, as the blonde lowered her left thigh to press against the Latina's core.

Callie flinched slightly at this new sensation, her throbbing clit aching for more friction, while her mind raced. Bucking her hips toward her wife's residual limb in an attempt to rid her brain of its untimely thoughts, Callie squeezed her eyes shut before ripping her lips from her wife's mouth.

"Stop. . .wait. . .please," the Latina stammered, a blush creeping across her face and chest.

Pushing up onto her hands and right knee, Arizona stared down into her wife's clearly conflicted eyes. "What happened?" She asked, the concern evident in her voice. Callie shook her head as she closed her eyes, too embarrassed and ashamed to speak. "Calliope. . ." Arizona urged.

Callie opened her eyes as she swallowed the lump that had formed in her throat. Finally finding her voice, she averted Arizona's gaze. "I. . .I'm sorry. I. . ." Callie began, but was unable to continue.

Moving to settle herself at her wife's side, Arizona pulled Callie's face toward her. "Look at me, Calliope," she demanded. "Look at me right now." When brown eyes tentatively reached her blue ones, Arizona was surprised to see tears welling in the chocolate orbs. "What's wrong?" She asked, pushing brunette locks away from Callie's face. "You can tell me. . ."

Knowing she needed to be completely honest with her wife, Callie let out a staggered breath. "That felt. . ._amazing_. . .Arizona. Like nothing I've ever felt."

Arizona searched her wife's face, confused by her statement. "What are you talking about," she asked.

"You. . .you're leg. . .you're. . .left thigh. When you. . .touched me with it. It felt. . ._so so good._"

"Well, isn't it _supposed_ to feel good?" Arizona questioned with a smirk, still wholly perplexed by her wife's reaction.

Callie's blush deepened when she realized she was going to have to be more straightforward – more blunt. "When you touched me with your limb, Arizona. . .it was different somehow. It felt _so_. . .good. It felt_ amazing_. . .but then it made me feel like a freak. . .or a pervert. . ." Callie trailed off.

"Wha. . ."

"It made me feel like a miscreant. . .or something. . .for feeling so much pleasure from something so. . .painful for you. . ."

"Callie. . ."

"I. . .I'm so sorry. . ."

"Callie, stop. Right now. I need you to stop," Arizona chided. "Please just stop."

"Arizona. . ."

"Shhh," Arizona softly replied, pressing her fingers to her wife's lips. "You have to accept this, Callie. . .just as much as I do. This is who I am now. This is who I'm going to be for the rest of my life – for the rest of _our_ life together. Nothing is going to change this," the blonde rationalized. "So. . .if this. . .if my leg. . .can be a source of pleasure for you, then so be it. We can't change things now."

Callie was unsure of who the blonde was trying to convince. "Arizona. . .please. . ."

"No more talking, babe. We will discuss this some other time. I promise," Arizona whispered as she leaned forward to capture her wife's lips. "But right now. . .right now, I want you so badly."

Hesitantly rolling onto her side to face the blonde, Callie nuzzled her nose against Arizona's neck. Finding only confidence, certainty, and love in her wife's blue eyes, Callie smirked. "Then take me. . ._please_."

As Arizona's nipples caressed Callie's breasts, they pressed their bodies more firmly together until they seemed to become one. In that moment, their souls seemed to intertwine, electricity jolting between them as they kissed hungrily.

Moving down Callie's body, Arizona explored every inch of her tanned skin with her tongue and mouth. Reaching the trimmed patch of dark curls, Arizona looked up toward her wife whose mouth hung open in anticipation. Pulling Callie's legs over her shoulders, Arizona wrapped her arms around her thighs, pulling her core closer to her face. Dipping her tongue to flick at her wife's erect bundle of nerves, Arizona smirked when Callie bucked her hips.

"Oh, God! Yes!" Callie cried out when she felt Arizona's warm lips envelop her throbbing member. The blonde continued to lick and suck just as she knew Callie needed, intermittently dipping her tongue into her wife's center. Perfectly content to continue her assault on her wife's core, Arizona was surprised when Callie tugged at her hair, pulling her upward. "Up here," the Latina breathed out.

Arizona obeyed, moving up her wife's body, both once again lying on their sides. Staring into the blonde's clearly aroused eyes, the Latina took Arizona's hand into hers, guiding it to the place her mouth had just vacated. Gasping when the blonde immediately pushed two fingers into her wet center, Callie held her wife's gaze as she in turn did the same. Arizona's eyes slammed shut at the delicious feeling her wife was creating inside her. "Open your eyes, Arizona," Callie requested. "I need to watch you come."

Arizona's eyes opened slowly and her mouth fell open when Callie's fingers curled, skillfully stroking her to perfection. "Yes, Callie! Oh, God. More. . .more. . ."

Their legs intertwined into the perfect position for their mutual pleasure, and Callie gasped when Arizona's thumb brushed against her clit before applying a steady pressure to her bundle of nerves. "Oh, God. . .Arizona. . .I'm. . .oh, baby. . .I'm coming," Callie ground out as her internal muscles clenched, sending her into a wild orgasm that consumed her entire being.

Arizona's center pulsed as she witnessed the unadulterated pleasure flash across Callie's wide eyes, the Latina's fingers somehow still managing to slide in and out of her. The blonde's body arched into her wife when Callie simultaneously curled her fingers and firmly circled her aching clit with her thumb sending her toppling over the edge, her throbbing core tugging on her wife's fingers. "Oh. . . oh. . .oh my God!"

Lying face to face, their noses touching, both women desperately tried to calm their ragged breathing. Several long minutes later, Arizona leaned in to gently kiss her utterly sated wife. Gently running her tongue along the Latina's lips, Arizona smiled when she felt her wife shiver in response. "Mmmm. . .amazing," Callie sighed.

"Mmm hmm. . ." Arizona agreed.

**XXXXXX**

Sometime later, after slipping into their pajamas, Callie rested her head on Arizona's shoulder as the blonde gently ran her fingers through her wife's thick locks.

"It's never going to be the same, is it?" The blonde questioned after several long moments of silence.

Callie hesitated before leaning up on her elbow to look at Arizona. Momentarily surprised by the insecurity she now found on her wife's face, a contrast to the confidence and certainty the blonde had displayed less than an hour prior, Callie shook her head. "No, babe. It's never going to be the same," she answered ruefully.

Arizona sighed and shook her head. "But that's not necessarily a _bad _thing," the Latina continued. Arizona searched the soulful eyes of the woman she loved. "Just because it's not the same. . .doesn't mean it's not _outstanding_. . ." Callie pecked her wife's lips. "_Amazing. . ." _she smirked. "_Breathtaking. . ." _she chuckled against her wife's face.

"Well don't stop there," Arizona teased. "By all means, keep going. . ."

"_Magnificent. . ."_

"_Awesome. . ."_

* * *

**AN3: **Your comments and reviews are always welcome, so please click that little blue button.


	12. Chapter 12

**Title:** When It Don't Come Easy

**Author:** HandsThatHeal

**Beta:** Funkyshaz57

**Pairing:** Callie/Arizona

**Rating:** NC-17

Summary: After watching Arizona turn away from the people who love her most as she struggles both physically and emotionally to come to terms with the injuries she sustained in the plane crash, Callie decides to take matters into her own hands by embarking on a cross country adventure with Arizona and Sofia in hopes of reaffirming their love for each other and deciding if they have what it takes to carry on as a family.

Disclaimer: All television shows, books, movies, songs, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work and the characters, events, and settings thereof are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.

**AN: **Very happy that you are continuing to enjoy this story. Huge thank you to my Beta for her help with the chapter!

* * *

**Chapter 12:**

"Hey," Callie muttered as she entered Sofia's bedroom, blinking her eyes in an attempt to filter the early morning sunlight that streamed through the window. "You're up already?"

Arizona smiled as she finished double knotting the toddler's shoes. "Yep, Sofia is _super excited _about the children's museum."

Callie grinned at her wife. "Oh, _she _is, is she?"

Arizona kissed Sofia's chubby cheek before pulling her bangs back with a pink and white bow that matched her shirt to perfection. "I mean look at her," Arizona beamed. "Can't you tell?"

Callie chuckled softly. "I can tell that _you're_ super excited. Sofia. . .not so much," Callie replied as she watched their daughter stubbornly attempt to untie the laces of her freshly tied shoes.

Arizona rolled her eyes. "Well, _she_ may not look excited right now, but she will when we get there," Arizona countered. "I did some research yesterday while you were out. I think we should definitely go to the Shedd Aquarium and the Kohl Children's Museum. The museum has a Wizard of Oz exhibit and Water Works, and a Habitat Park. . .oh. . .and there's a kid sized grocery store where she can run the cash register or stock the shelves. She can do her own shopping and even bake bread in the bakery. You know how much she likes shopping, Callie. . ."

Callie searched her wife's face as she listened to her uninterrupted ramblings. "Arizona. . ."

". . .and there's a veterinarian's office. She can wear a little lab coat and take care of stuffed kittens and puppies. . . and. . .and there's a hands on house where she can help build a kid sized home. . ."

"Arizona. . ."

". . .and an exhibit where she can explore the concepts behind renewable energy using the wind and the sun. . .she can discover how much power it takes to run a TV, or a refrigerator, or a toaster. . ."

"She's a year and a half. . ."

"It's never too early to teach her to be a good steward of the environment, Calliope. . ."

It was Callie's turn to roll her eyes. "Arizona. . ." she tried once again, raising her voice slightly in an attempt to get her wife's attention.

"What?" She asked.

Callie paused, unsure if she should say anything to put a damper on her wife's seemingly cheerful mood. Afraid that this overenthusiasm was a misguided attempt at masking some other emotion that was threatening to take over her mind, Callie decided she had to take the chance. "What's going on?" She asked simply.

"What do you mean, what's going on?" Arizona dismissively asked.

"I mean what's this all about? What are you thinking?" Callie continued. "Is this about. . .last night?"

"What about last night?" Arizona huffed, irritation entering her tone.

"Arizona, you know what I'm talking about," Callie deliberately replied.

The blonde shook her head. "I'm fine, Calliope," she stated firmly as she settled Sofia onto the floor. Making sure the toddler was steady on her feet, Arizona stepped toward her wife. "Can I not just be excited to spend the day with my family?"

Callie recoiled slightly when she saw the anger and frustration beginning to commence in Arizona's suddenly hardened eyes. Deciding to allow her wife to continue what she was sure was an emotional diversion – a façade of conflicted feelings –Callie hesitantly relented. _For now_. "Okay," she surrendered holding up her hands in defeat. "I'll go get ready."

**XXXXXX**

"She's beautiful," Arizona heard a woman to her right say as she contentedly watched Sofia attempt to construct what looked like a pretend Panini sandwich at the play Potbelly Café exhibit of the museum.

Turning her attention toward the red haired woman, Arizona smiled. "Thank you," she replied before returning her attention back to Sofia who was wearing an adorable red apron over her outfit.

"Where'd she get such dark hair?" The woman asked, clearly observing the profound differences in Arizona and Sofia's features.

Before she could open her mouth to respond, a stunning Latina – the larger version of the tiny human in question – stepped over the bench to take a seat next to her wife.

"Sorry," she stated as she flopped down next to the blonde. "That was Bailey. She wanted to know when the He. . ." Callie paused, remembering the fact that she was surrounded by not only her own, but several _other_ tiny humans and their adoring parents. Recovering, she lowered her voice. "She wanted to know when the H – E – L – L we are coming back. Apparently the new attendings are still wreaking havoc on the lounge, and she needs back up."

Arizona chuckled softly. Completely forgetting the question of the stranger beside her, the blonde asked, "When _are _we going back?"

Callie tilted her head to the side, shrugging her shoulders. "Well, we've been gone almost four weeks. I asked Owen for _at least _a month – maybe two. I thought we could decide our next move once we get to your parent's house in a few days," Callie replied. When Arizona didn't respond, she nervously offered, "But. . .if you're ready to go back now. . .we can. We. . .we can go back to Seattle whenever you want."

"Oh, you're from Seattle?" The disregarded redhead asked, clearly unwilling to be overlooked.

Callie and Arizona's heads both snapped toward the woman. "Umm. . .yes?" Callie stated, surprised by the interruption, completely unaware of the very brief conversation this person had shared with her wife just moments before.

"My brother lives in Burien. . ."

"And you are?" Callie asked, looking between this woman and her wife, slightly perturbed by the stranger's obvious eavesdropping.

"My name is Bethany, and that," she said, pointing to the little boy who had just swiped the tomato and onions from Sofia's faux Panini, "is my son Simon. I was just talking to your friend about how beautiful her little girl is, but we hadn't actually introduced ourselves."

Callie smirked, exchanging an awkward glance with her wife. "Oh. . .sorry. . ." Arizona laughed at the expression on her wife's face before quickly recovering. "I'm Arizona and this is _my wife_ Callie. And to answer your question, my daughter Sofia clearly gets her _dark hair _from her mommy."

Bethany glanced between the women, toward Sofia, then back to the clearly amused couple. "She really is a lovely little girl," Bethany finally replied. "You should. . ."

Before she could finish her statement, all three women's attention was quickly diverted toward the _deli _where their children were playing when they heard Simon begin to cry. "No!" Sofia scolded him. "Share. . ." She instructed. "Share toys!"

Callie immediately jumped to her feet, but stopped when she felt Arizona's hand on her arm. "I'll get her," the blonde insisted as she stood to save the blue eyed boy from Sofia's disciplining lecture.

Bethany quickly grabbed Simon who was whimpering softly, his freckled cheeks wet with tears. "It's okay, baby," she soothed. "It's time for us to go, anyway. It was nice meeting you," Bethany said as she wiped Simon's nose with a tissue. "Bye bye, Sofia," she called before grabbing her stroller and walking away.

Callie and Arizona exchanged an amused glance before Arizona leaned down to pick up the miniature Latina. "You shouldn't yell at your friends, baby girl," Callie instructed as she pulled down the leg of Sofia's pants from where it had ridden up when Arizona scooped the toddler into her arms.

Arizona's mouth fell open, her brow furrowing in disagreement. "She was right, Callie. He needed to share."

"She made that poor baby cry, Arizona."

"Well then maybe he shouldn't have stolen her cold cuts. . ."

**XXXXXX **

"Sofia! No!" Callie shouted as she chased after the toddler, unfortunately not quick enough to prevent her from smacking her palms against the glass of the giant aquarium.

"Big fishy! Mommy. . big fishy!" Sofia cheerfully screamed as her hands once again banged against the glass.

Quickly taking the toddler into her arms, Callie grabbed one of her flailing arms. Holding it firmly, she kissed a chubby fist. "You have to be careful, baby. No hitting the glass, okay?"

"Oh, Callie. . ." Arizona admonished. "She's fine. This thing holds like 5,000,000 gallons of water. If it can't stand up to the abuse of a 22 pound child, then they may need to re-evaluate their infrastructure."

"Infrastructure? Arizona? Really?" Callie bewilderedly inquired.

"What?" Arizona huffed. "She's just having fun."

"I'm all for having fun, but she can't just run all over the place like a crazy person. We can't just excuse her for being destructive. What kind of message does that send?" Callie questioned, the volume of her voice rising with every word.

"She's a toddler, Callie," Arizona chided, taking Sofia from her wife. "She's learning to be independent. When did you become so authoritarian, anyway?"

Callie wanted to scream. She wanted to be honest. She didn't consider herself _authoritarian, _but maybe she was. Maybe it happened when she took on the role as the _sole_ parent of this wonderful child so many months ago. "It's not like I'm trying to break her spirit, Arizona," Callie hastily replied, looking around to see if their argument was being observed. "I think we have to have at least _a few_ firm rules. No hitting, no running in the street, no _banging on glass_. . ."

"Well,_ I_ think we need to choose our battles, Calliope," Arizona replied, turning away from the confused Latina. "Come on, baby," she cooed into Sofia's ear. "Let's go see the jelly fish."

**XXXXXX**

"Excuse me?" A tall, muscular man wearing a Chicago Cubs baseball cap inquired from behind Arizona and Callie. "Are you going to do something about that?"

Callie and Arizona both turned toward the voice. "Something about what?" Callie asked in confusion.

"Your kid," the man brusquely replied.

"What about _my kid_?" Arizona snipped, turning to fully face the man.

"She just jumped in front of my daughter," the man stated simply.

Callie turned back toward Sofia as Arizona continued to engage this man. "What's your problem?" She quipped, stepping closer to him. "It's a freakin' kid sized submarine and there are like 15 children over there, all fighting to have their chance to look through those three tiny little windows. Get over yourself."

"Arizona. . ." Callie warned her wife when she returned from gathering Sofia from the pack of inquisitive tiny humans. Turing toward the concerned parent, Callie sighed. "I'm sorry, sir. It's kind of a madhouse over there. . ."

"Don't apologize to him, Calliope," Arizona advised. "He's being an ass, and his kid clearly needs to toughen up."

"Arizona!" Callie replied, shocked at her wife's words. "I'm sorry," the Latina stated again when she turned back toward the man. "Come on," she demanded, grabbing her wife's arm. "We're going."

"No, Calliope, _we_ are not _going_ anywhere."

"Yes, _we are_." Callie insisted, pulling the fuming blonde away from the exhibit and toward the row of strollers lining the wall. Settling Sofia into hers, Callie buckled her in before unlocking the breaks with her foot and guiding the stroller toward the exit, tugging her now irate wife behind her.

"Let go of me!" Arizona yelled as Callie dragged her through the central concourse of the Aquarium and toward the large doors of the main entrance. "Let go of me!"

"What the Hell is wrong with you today?" Callie shouted once they were out of the building.

Arizona flailed the arm still caught in Callie's grasp. "Just let go of me!"

"Stop it, Arizona!" Callie scolded, dropping the blonde's arm as she turned to face her wife where they stood shouting at each other in the middle of the Aquarium parking lot. "We are _not_ doing this again! We are so far past _this_ place! What the Hell is wrong with you?"

"She's my baby, too!" Arizona shouted back at her wife. "She's my baby, and I can take care of her by myself!"

Callie halted, her mind laboring to comprehend the implications of her wife's words. "Of course she is," Callie replied, her prior anger now converting to confusion and uncertainty. "Of course you can."

Arizona sighed, her shoulders slumping. "Just take me home," she requested, her eyes hardened with resentment. "Please. . .just take me home."

**XXXXXX**

Glancing toward her wife, Callie was unable to determine what Arizona was feeling, her every feature a jumbled mix of negative emotions.

Hurt.

Anger.

Sadness.

Disappointment.

Callie hadn't seen her look like _this_ in several months, and the fact that she did – the fact that her amazing wife was falling back into the dark abyss of depression and rage –scared the Latina to death. Clearing her throat, Callie turned her attention back toward the road. "You want to stop somewhere for dinner?" She hesitantly asked as she pulled the car out of the parking lot.

"Do I look like I want to stop somewhere for dinner?" Arizona quipped, her gaze fixed on the passing trees out the side window, her tone dripping with contempt. "Do I look like I want to go _anywhere _with you?" She relentlessly declared. "Just take me back to the damn RV."

Callie's shoulders slumped. She had stopped being her wife's punching bag months ago and that comment – that little remark spewing from her wife's lips after all the healing they had done – was a lot to swallow. "Fine!" Callie spat. "Whatever you want."

**XXXXXX**

Grabbing the key to the RV door from where it rested in the cup holder of their rental car, Arizona jerked open the passenger's side door before the car had even rolled to a stop. Slamming the car door behind her, she stalked toward the larger vehicle, quickly taking the stairs, before unlocking the door and entering their mobile home, that door also crashing shut behind the blonde in the wake of her punishing tirade.

Arizona felt claustrophobic.

She needed to breathe – she wanted to run.

She needed to detach herself from the disappointed and saddened eyes of the wife she adored. She needed to distance herself from the precocious toddler who held her heart in the palm of her chubby little hand.

Slamming the bedroom door closed, she quickly turned the lock before sliding down the door and landing awkwardly onto the floor. Finally giving into the torrent of emotions that had been slowly building inside her tormented mind and body for most of the day, Arizona let her tears fall.

Digging the heels of her hands into her eyes as she continued to cry, Arizona agonizingly considered what had caused this deluge of negative emotions to coil so tightly inside of her, before ultimately exploding from their confinement.

_Despite the minor hitch they had experienced during their love making the previous night, Arizona awoke early that morning completely sated and undeniably happy. Rolling toward the middle of the bed, she kissed Callie's shoulder blade before grabbing her crutches and entering the bathroom for a shower. _

_Shower complete, clothing and prosthesis donned, make-up applied, hair straightened and tucked behind one ear, Arizona paused momentarily to scrutinize the woman staring back at her in the mirror. As she allowed her gaze to examine every inch of herself, she couldn't help the smile that turned at the corners of her lips. _

_Callie was right. _

_Despite everything she had been forced to endure, Arizona Robbins was still fundamentally the same person. Arizona Robbins was still. . .hot._

"_Mamma! Mamma!" Arizona's silent reverie was soon broken when she heard Sofia calling for her from the next room. "Get my out!"_

_Arizona's smile widened as she listened to her daughter chattering through the walls of the RV. Quietly moving through the bedroom, she quickly allowed herself to admire the shapely form of her sleeping wife, before exiting the room to gather Sofia._

"_Morning, big girl!" Arizona cooed when she entered the room. Pulling the toddler from her crib, Arizona turned to take the six steps toward the chair in the corner of the room, but caught her right toe on the leg of the crib, sending her suddenly unbalanced body stumbling toward the floor. _

_Overcome by sudden panic and fear, her first instinct was to protect Sofia who continued to chatter, completely oblivious to the fact that they were about to tumble to the floor. Reaching forward with her left hand, with Sofia firmly held in her right arm, Arizona attempted to soften their fall by grasping the side of the crib. _

_Landing on her back side with a groan, her heart pounding in her ears, Arizona immediately looked over Sofia to assure she hadn't injured anything during their minor scuffle. "I'm sorry, baby," Arizona softly stated as she pulled her closer to her body, hugging her daughter tightly. _

_Her daughter._

_Callie's daughter._

_Mark's daughter._

_Arizona's frightened mind instantly flashed to a time not long before when she had shamefully denied this wonderful little girl. Shamefully and disgracefully used this amazing tiny human to lash out at and scathingly cut the mother who was struggling to keep their family afloat and the father who she would never know._

"_. . .I will make all the decisions. Just so you know, I'm gonna vote to take the settlement for Sofia because Mark would want her to have the money."_

"_I think Mark would want you to pick up YOUR daughter when she's crying. I guess he's gonna have to deal with disappointment just like the rest of us. . ."_

Arizona regretted those words the moment they punitively sprung from her venomous tongue. In that moment, however, completely consumed by rage and despair, she was wholly unable to stop herself.

At that point in time, she felt like she was drowning. She was hurt and lonely and just _so mad_. She was sad and lost and hopeless, and in that moment, her intent was simply to wound. The rage that boiled inside of her made her want to physically throttle something or someone, but instead, she chose to wound with her malicious words.

By allowing those words to fly from her lips, Arizona felt in control of something. She was hitting hard and hitting fast so she would only have to hit once, because she wanted Callie to feel every bit of the pain, sadness, frustration, and disappointment that had taken hold, relentlessly consuming and possessing her once joyful soul.

But. . .in the end, she had only made _herself_ feel more miserable than before.

How could she have denied this innocent child she loved unconditionally?

Arizona had made a lot of mistakes in the aftermath of the plane crash, but those words – those words bitterly hurled for no reason other than to deeply cut her wife – she would do anything to take back.

**XXXXXX**

Two hours after her wife had abruptly disappeared into the confinement of their bedroom, Callie sat in a chair in the corner of Sofia's bedroom, rocking the drowsy toddler to sleep. Humming softly, she stroked the child's face as she stared blankly at the wall separating the two bedrooms.

Recognizing that Sofia had drifted off by the sound of her now steady breathing, Callie kissed the top of her head before standing and placing the toddler in her crib. Covering her with a soft pink blanket, Callie's hand lingered over the child's heart. "Mommy loves you, baby girl," Callie whispered as she softly stroked her chest. "Mamma loves you, too."

Exiting the room, Callie quietly pulled the door closed. Staring at the adjacent bedroom door that still remained shut and locked, Callie pinched the bridge of her nose and closed her eyes. Stepping toward the door, she raised her hand to knock gently, but stopped suddenly, unsure of what she would actually say if Arizona did happen to open up and let her in. Turning around, she leaned against the door before sliding down it to sit on the floor as her own thoughts and memories began to flood her troubled mind.

Callie couldn't deny the distressing familiarity that had consumed her mind and body when she grabbed Arizona's arm to lead her out of the Aquarium. Nor could she disregard the uncompromisingly hard and glacial expression in her wife's darkened blue eyes or the unrestricted malice in her wife's words, looking and sounding so similar to what they had been months before.

"_. . .do I look like I want to go anywhere for dinner?"_

"_. . .do I look like I want to go anywhere with you?"_

Callie shook her head, recalling her wife's words from earlier that evening as words from months prior also took hold of her mind.

"_. . .do I look okay? I'm sitting in a pool of my own urine!"_

"_I'm putting you in the shower."_

"_No! Just get out!"_

"_Hey! Do not talk to me that way!"_

"_Please. . ."_

"_Arizona!"_

"_Please! Get out! Did you hear me? You did this! I can't even pee by myself!"_

Callie shook her head as she tightly squeezed her eyes shut. Wiping at the tears that were now sliding down her cheeks, Callie placed her palm over her mouth in an attempt to stifle the sound of her whimpers. The words she had uttered next, she wasn't proud of. Callie regretted those words the moment they punitively sprung from her venomous tongue. In that moment, however, completely consumed by rage and despair, she was wholly unable to stop herself.

"_Yeah, and that's a problem! Because you now stink! This bathroom stinks!"_

At that point in time, she felt like she was drowning. She was hurt and lonely and just _so mad_. She was sad and lost and hopeless, and in that moment, her intent was not necessarily to wound, though she was sure she had. The rage that boiled inside of her made her want to physically throttle something or someone, but instead, she chose to attempt a little _tough love_. She was trying to get Arizona to understand that she couldn't do this on her own and that she needed to let people help her, though the words that actually spilled from her mouth were much less eloquent and much more cruel.

Callie needed to feel in control of something – anything. So, she had allowed the pain, sadness, frustration, and disappointment to take hold and relentlessly consume her as she threw Arizona's arms around her neck, hoisting her wife up off the floor and into the shower, slamming her flailing body against the tiled wall.

"_Get off of me!"_

"_I am not sharing my home with someone who smells like this!"_

"_Get off of me! Get off of me!"_

"_I have nowhere else to go? This is my life now, too. . ."_

Leaning back against that bedroom door, sobs wracked the Latina's body, just as they had months before in the shower of the apartment she shared with her wife and daughter. Holding her head in her hands, Callie halted suddenly when she heard strangled cries coming from the opposite side of the door. Turning to kneel facing the door, Callie grabbed the door knob to enter, but was foiled by the still bolted lock.

"Arizona. . ."

"Callie. . ."

Both women spoke simultaneously.

"Please let me in, Arizona," Callie pleaded as she tugged on the door knob.

"I. . .I want to, but. . .I'm not sure I know how," the blonde sobbed.

Struck by the double meaning in their statements, Callie could only cry harder as she heard her wife take a deep shuddering breath. "Please, Arizona, please," she begged. "We've come so far. Please don't shut me out now."

"I. . .I'm so ashamed, Callie," Arizona cried. "I'm so ashamed and mad. . .and I don't even think I can look at you right now. I thought I was healing. I thought _we_ were healing. What the fuck happened?"

Callie recoiled at the honestly in her wife's strangled words. "I don't know, babe," she answered ruefully. "We've both done. . .and said. . .horrible, disgraceful things. _I've_ done so much that I'm not proud of. But we're here. We're both still here." Callie struggled to speak through the tears that continued to fall and the emotions that coursed through her veins. "And. . .and when you're ready. . .when you _can_ look at me, I'll be right here. I'm not leaving, Arizona."

Callie once again lowered herself to sit with her back against the door as she continued to listen to Arizona's heart wrenching sobs. Resting her head against the door, she too continued to cry until finally her eyes ran dry and she fell into a fitful sleep.

* * *

**AN2: **Reviews and comments are certainly welcome! Thank you!


	13. Chapter 13

**Title:** When It Don't Come Easy

**Author:** HandsThatHeal

**Beta:** Funkyshaz57

**Pairing:** Callie/Arizona

**Rating:** NC-17

**Summary:** After watching Arizona turn away from the people who love her most as she struggles both physically and emotionally to come to terms with the injuries she sustained in the plane crash, Callie decides to take matters into her own hands by embarking on a cross-country adventure with Arizona and Sofia in hopes of reaffirming their love for each other and deciding if they have what it takes to carry on as a family.

**Disclaimer:** All television shows, books, movies, songs, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work and the characters, events, and settings thereof are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.

**AN: **There were some conflicted opinions and reviews for the previous chapter, but that's okay. That's what makes the world go around. If we all agreed, this would be a pretty boring world. Anyway, thank you so much for continuing to read and review!

**AN2: **An extra special, super huge thank you to my beta for essentially taking over when my brain stopped working while writing this chapter.

* * *

**Chapter 13:**

Arizona awoke with a start, her neck aching miserably from the awkward position she had fallen asleep in against the bedroom door. Stretching her stiff neck from side to side trying to rid herself of the discomfort, she reached into her jacket pocket for her phone to check the time.

2:26am.

Surprised that she had survived sleeping upright against the unforgiving stiffness of the wooden door for more than three hours, Arizona hastily shoved her phone back into her pocket before crawling toward the bed and reaching for the mattress to assist herself into standing. Once on her feet, she stripped off her clothing and prosthesis and replaced them with pajama shorts and a long-sleeved t-shirt. Throwing her body back onto the bed, she allowed the events of the previous day to consume her already burdened mind.

Hearing Callie's almost frantic sobs on the other side of the room she had barricaded herself into was certainly not what Arizona had expected from her wife. She knew Callie would be angry at her – or hurt even by her words and actions – but in no way did she imagine she would hear her wife admitting to doing some kind of horrible disgraceful things that she wasn't proud of. Searching the recesses of her weary mind, Arizona was wholly unsure of what Callie could be referring to.

Deciding to get something to drink before climbing into the cold empty bed, Arizona grabbed her crutches and then moved to unlock the door, quietly stepping out into the main cabin of the RV. Opening the refrigerator door, she grabbed a bottle of water, immediately removing the lid and taking a drink. Stepping back toward the bedroom, Arizona momentarily glanced to her left where she saw a mess of maps, the GPS, Callie's cell phone and iPod, pens, and paper strewn about. Aborting her path back to bed, she quietly took a seat at the table.

Arizona curiously sorted through the mess before finally grabbing the large map of the United States that Callie had meticulously kept by placing a sticker of Sofia's choice over each and every one of their destinations. Smiling, Arizona gently ran the tips of her fingers over the stickers that had been joyfully and lovingly placed by her wife and daughter.

Minnie Mouse over Glacier National Park in Montana.

Thomas the Train over the Grand Canyon.

Winnie the Pooh over San Antonio.

Olivia the Pig over Dallas.

Eyeing the other stickers that now graced the paper map, Arizona glanced toward their current location in Chicago, Illinois. Noting that a sticker had not yet been placed there, she was surprised to see that a red X marked the spot instead and was connected to a red line charting the most direct route from their current location back to Seattle. Following the line with her eyes, Arizona saw a larger red X on the map covering the entire state of Idaho. In blue ink instead of red, the blonde noted another route that Callie had strategically plotted, purposefully diverting their trip around that whole godforsaken state.

Swallowing the lump that was forming in her throat, Arizona sipped her water before painstakingly folding the map. Sorting through and straightening the rest of the paraphernalia scattered across the table, she uncovered a note pad opened to a page covered in Callie's familiar large scrawl.

_1. __Call Barbara and Daniel_

_2. __Call Owen_

_3. __Call day-care_

_4. __Text Karev_

_5. __Storage for RV/Sell RV?_

_6. __Have apartment cleaned_

_7. __Call David - ? tweak knee flexion_

_8. __Call lawyer_

Arizona's heart dropped as she read and reread the to do list Callie had clearly made for herself.

They were going home.

Callie was giving up and making plans and they were going home.

There would be no trip to her parents' house for Thanksgiving because she and Callie would be back at work and Sofia would be back in day-care. The RV would be stored or sold to the highest bidder after their arrival back in Seattle, and their apartment would be spotless, anxiously awaiting their return. She would have a PT appointment already scheduled because Callie was obviously concerned about her prosthesis, and for some reason, Callie would be speaking with their lawyer.

Feeling a twinge of guilt for perhaps stumbling upon something her wife wasn't quite ready for her to know about; Arizona pushed herself away from the table before standing with her crutches in order to return to the bedroom. Hearing movement behind her, the blonde noticed for the first time that Callie was asleep under a mountain of blankets on the plush cushions of the couch.

Hesitating momentarily, Arizona decided to step toward the fitfully sleeping Latina. Taking a seat on the end of the couch, the blonde watched her wife's eyes twitch as a dream filled her lethargic mind.

"Oh, Callie. . ."Arizona sighed more to herself than anyone else.

After studying her wife for several long moments, Arizona quickly turned her heard when she noticed Callie begin to stir. Deciding that she wouldn't be able to escape quickly enough to go unnoticed by her wife, Arizona reluctantly decided to turn her attention back toward the rapidly awakening Latina.

"Arizona?" Callie called, sensing her wife's presence. "You okay?" She asked, her eyes blinking several times as she pushed herself up to sit against the arm of the couch.

Arizona sat quietly, refusing to meet her wife's gaze, unsure of how to begin. She had scrutinized every single word she wanted to utter to her wife as she sat crying against the bedroom door, but now unfortunately, the words escaped her. Scooting back onto the now empty cushion of the couch, Arizona briefly turned her attention toward her wife, the apprehension and concern evident in those deep brown, soulful eyes.

"Did I ever tell you why I started wearing the Heelys?" Arizona asked after a moment's silence, still unable to completely look into Callie's eyes.

Callie's brow furrowed. She actually didn't think Arizona _had_ ever told her this story. "No, I don't think so," she replied as she nervously searched her wife's face for some sort of meaning to this conversation.

Arizona cleared her throat before a slight smile tugged at the corners of her mouth. "The summer between my first and second years at Hopkins, I completed the Pediatrics Clerkship and then started a sub-internship," Arizona began to explain. "I was placed at the Harriet Lane Peds Clinic and mostly did H&Ps to present to the senior residents. Sometimes. . .I got to work with child life specialists, legal advocates, and social workers, but what I really enjoyed was working with the rehab team. . ."

Taking in this bit of information, Callie stared at her wife, an amused smirk on her face.

"Don't look at me like that, Calliope," Arizona huffed, her gaze fully meeting that of her wife for the first time since the beginning of their conversation. "It's not like you have the best track record with therapists either."

Callie chuckled softly. "Fair enough," she replied, a slight smile remaining on her face, though she continued to protectively watch her wife.

"Anyway. . ." Arizona continued, slight annoyance entering her voice. "I always wore scrubs and a lab coat, but there really wasn't a color code for the scrubs. Not back then at least. Now I think it's like royal blue or lagoon blue or Caribbean blue. . .it's not ceil blue because that's what the residents at work wear. . .but it's some kind of blue. . ." Arizona trailed off when she recognized her own ramble. Gathering her thoughts, she again cleared her throat before continuing. "So, I wore my scrubs. . .and the tennis shoes I wore _always_ matched whatever color scrubs I was wearing. No matter what color – pink, grey, purple, green – my shoes always matched my scrubs. The brighter the better."

"I guess that explains the grey ones with orange laces you wear now," Callie offered, a hesitant smile reaching her lips, though she remained confused by the point of this conversation.

Arizona smiled slightly with a quick nod of her head. "I think at one point in time I had like 15 pair of tennis shoes," Arizona reluctantly admitted. "Ridiculous, I know," she continued when she saw her wife's look of surprise.

Callie sat quietly as she carefully studied the blonde's every move, every facial expression, every variation in the inflection of her voice. Patiently allowing her to continue, Callie shifted in her seat, crossing her legs underneath herself.

"It became kind of a joke around the clinic, but the kids and their parents seemed to like it. It was always a guessing game from one day to the next as to what color I would be wearing. . ." Arizona looked down, fumbling with a stray piece of string that hung from the blanket covering Callie's legs. "About half way through the summer we got a patient named Keira. She was thirteen and had a chondroblastic osteosarcoma of her right lower tibia. . ."

When glassy blue eyes met her apprehensive brown orbs, Callie adamantly held her wife's gaze. Nodding in understanding, she silently urged the blonde to continue. "Chemo drugs were started accordingly, and several surgical techniques were discussed," Arizona explained. "On the day of Keira's surgery, I found her sitting on the edge of her bed putting on a pair of brand new Heelys that her mom and dad had gotten her for her birthday a couple of months before," Arizona hesitated, her eyes once again nervously dropping from her wife's concerned gaze. "Her surgeon told her that she may never have enough range of motion in her ankle to wear them, so she asked me if I would add them to my collection. I didn't want to take them. . .but I didn't know what else to do. She was so scared and so upset, so I _promised_ her I would wear them. . ." Tears welled in Arizona's eyes, her voice cracking. "She never got to wear them. Her symptoms started soon after her birthday and then she was in the hospital, so she never got to use them. . .then. . .there were complications. . ."

"She didn't make it?" Callie asked, surprised that a child wouldn't survive this type of surgery.

". . .she never woke up from the anesthesia given during the operation. . ."

"Arizona. . ."

"I made a promise to her. A promise that I was able to keep for twelve years and eventually that promise just became a part of who I am. A part of what makes me. . .me – someone who rides around on Heelys," Arizona stated, her eyes welling with tears. "And it's not something I do all the time, but at least when I want to, I have that option. . .but, now. . .I can't. I can't keep that promise. I can't wheel around anymore, because my leg is gone. I made a promise. . .and when I make promises I keep them. . ."

Upon hearing these words, Callie's head snapped to full attention. "And I clearly don't!" She stated sharply, her tone biting into the otherwise quiet of the vehicle. Callie wasn't sure where the words were coming from, but she was wholly unable to stop them as they slipped from her tongue. "I'm the one who promised not to let them take your leg. . .so now. . .not only am I the bad doctor who let you down by allowing Karev to save your life by cutting off your leg, I'm also the _horrible. . .miserable _human being who crushed a patient's dreams by successfully ending the reign of a twelve-year-old promise. Damn! I'm amazing. Is there no one who can escape the power I wield? Is there anyone left in this world who won't have to deal with the hurt and disappointment I've caused."

"Callie. . ."

"What the Hell, Arizona? Is there anything that you don't blame me for?" Throwing the blanket back from her legs, Callie jumped from her seat and quickly moved through the vehicle toward the bedroom. She was, and had tried to be patient and understanding and anything else Arizona needed her to be, but clearly her tolerance and emotions were wearing thin. "It appears that you've gotten over your inability to look at me, so if it's okay with you, I'm going to enter _your_ bedroom, now. I'd like to change the clothes I've been wearing for the past twenty hours," Callie spat at the now speechless blonde. "I won't stay. . .I won't touch you. . .or. . .or fuck you. . .or anything else that may send your universe into a fucking cataclysm. . ."

"Calliope. . ."

"No, Arizona. Don't Calliope me. I. . .I can't do this. I can't walk around on eggshells all the time. I can't spend the rest of my life wondering when the shit is going to hit the fan," Callie muttered as she began to pace the vehicle.

"Will you just listen to me?"

"No, Arizona! I won't listen. I can't listen. Not anymore," Callie stated firmly. "I never know what you're going to say or do and half the time, I'm not even sure of what the Hell you're talking about. You tell me you don't want to go home, then you demand I take you back to Seattle. You tell me you won't run, then you lock yourself in the damn bedroom for hours. You spend the day arguing with me over what's best for Sofia, but then you completely abandon her when it's convenient for you. You tell me about a promise you made a hundred years ago and some story about Lagoon blue or. . .or Caribbean blue scrubs and an obnoxious amount of tennis shoes that makes absolutely no sense to me, and. . ."

"I fell yesterday. . ." she meekly admitted.

"You blame me for breaking a. . ." Callie paused, barely hearing her wife's voice over her own tirade. "What?" she asked in confusion.

"Yesterday morning," Arizona hesitantly stated. "When I was getting Sofia up before the museum. I tripped over the leg of her crib and I. . ._we_ fell. . ." Arizona trailed off as she stared at her now silent wife. "I fell, Callie. I fell over while carrying our daughter."

"Are you okay?" Callie asked, the concern evident in her voice. "Is Sofia okay?"

Anger flashed across the blonde's face. "Of course she's okay, Callie. I'm not stupid. I may be disabled, but I'm not a fucking moron. . ."

"I. . .I didn't mean. . ."

"Yes. A little bit you did!" Arizona scolded. "But you're right. I see how you look at me. I see how you watch me with Sofia. And falling with her yesterday just brought back up all the insecurities I still have. That's why I was being so. . ._ridiculous_. . .yesterday. I was overcompensating, and I got. . ._out of hand_. . .with that guy at the aquarium. . ."

Callie swallowed the lump that had now settled in her throat. "Arizona, yesterday at the aquarium. . ."

Arizona shook her head, once again unable to meet her wife's gaze. "I've said some really horrible things to you, Calliope."

Callie searched the blonde's entire form, confused by the sudden shift in the trajectory of their conversation. Taking a seat back on the couch, the Latina let out a shaky breath in an attempt to gather her conflicted thoughts and settle her volatile emotions. "Arizona. . ."

"No, Callie. I have. . ."

Taking in her wife's defeated posture and crushed tone of voice, Callie patted the cushion beside her. "Arizona, please come sit with me."

Arizona's eyes darted between the seat next to her wife and the bedroom door. Deciding that it was indeed the time to stop running, she hesitantly moved toward the sofa. Leaning her crutches against the front of it, she gently took a seat a slight distance from her wife. Both women faced forward, nervously staring at the far wall of the vehicle, neither sure of where to begin.

"I need you to be honest with me, Arizona."

"Okay. . ."

Callie thoughtfully chose her words. "Do you still want to be with me?"

Arizona was shocked by her wife's question, though if she was honest with herself, she knew she shouldn't be. Finally turning to face the Latina who sat nervously wringing her hands as she stared across the room, Arizona sighed as she placed a hand over Callie's. "Yes," she stated simply. "Without question."

Callie let out the breath she didn't know she was holding. "I'm so. . .so sorry," Callie cried when she finally met her wife's gaze. "I. . .I shouldn't have grabbed you yesterday. I shouldn't have dragged you out of the aquarium. I. . .I shouldn't have shoved you against the wall. . ."

Arizona's brow furrowed in confusion. "Wha. . .what wall?"

"In the shower. . .at home. . .I could have hurt you. I was just so scared. And so, _so_ hurt. I was afraid you were giving up."

"Callie. . ."

"Just let me say this. . .please. I've waited too long already, so _please _let me finish," Callie requested as she squeezed her wife's hands. Running her thumb over the blonde's gold wedding band, a tear slipped down a perfectly tanned cheek. "When I came to get you that night – for the settlement meeting – I couldn't find you, and my mind immediately jumped to the worst possible conclusion."

"Callie, I could never. . ."

"I was so scared. . .but then, there you were. You were there, and you were okay, but you looked so defeated and so vulnerable. All I wanted was for you to understand that no matter what you thought, you couldn't do it on your own. You wouldn't let me help you, though. You just kept fighting me when all I wanted was to be there for you," Callie stammered, her tears continuing to flow. "I said horrible things to you that night, Arizona. Terrible. . .cruel things. And then, when you needed me most – when I should have been your rock – I broke down."

"Oh, Callie," Arizona whispered as she pulled her wife into her arms. "It's okay. I'm okay. _We're_ going to be okay. . ."

Callie pulled back. "It's not okay, Arizona. What kind of person. . .what kind of wife says those things to the person she loves more than anything in this world?"

"It's not like I made it easy on you," Arizona replied.

"You were in a plane crash, Arizona! You lost your leg! Your job wasn't to make it easy on me."

"That still doesn't excuse my behavior, Callie," Arizona admitted. "Some of it, maybe, but not the things I said about Sofia."

"What are you talking about?"

"When we fell yesterday, I started to second guess myself again. It made me feel useless and incapable of caring for her. It made me feel like I did when. . ." Arizona wiped at the dampness from her own cheeks. Sighing heavily, she ran her palms back and forth against the tops of her thighs. "I denied her, Callie. That night of the settlement meeting, I told you pick up _your_ daughter like she wasn't mine. I rejected her when she needed me most. What kind of mother. . ." Arizona trailed off, her voice cracking with emotion. "I'm so ashamed of myself."

Callie gathered the blonde into her arms as sobs consumed her body. "No, baby, don't do this to yourself. You tripped and fell. That could have happened to anyone. It doesn't make you any less capable of caring for her. It's okay," Callie tried to sooth. "Sofia's okay. She loves you. I love you. . .more than anything. I just wish you would see that because sometimes I feel like you still doubt my love for you."

Both women clung to each other as their tears fell, the raw emotion of their own resentment and humiliation seeping from their exhausted minds and bodies with every fallen tear. "I love you, too," Arizona breathed into Callie's ear.

When their tears began to subside, Callie pressed the blonde to lie down on the couch, settling herself against the back of the cushions and pulling her wife's back to rest firmly against her front. "We have to stop doing this, Arizona," Callie sighed as she smoothed blonde hair away from her wife's face. Leaning forward, she ran her nose along her wife's jaw line before gently kissing her soft cheek. "We should know better by now. We should know that we get ourselves into so much more trouble by not talking – by not being honest. Why do we do that? Why are we so afraid of each other?"

Arizona pondered her wife's question. "Because we both know we have the power to break the other. We know it would be unbearable to go through life without the other."

Callie curled her arm around her wife's body, pressing her palm to Arizona's flat stomach as she pulled the blonde's body flush against her own. "I couldn't bear to have you missing from my life, Arizona. I wouldn't survive that."

"I'm here. I'm not going anywhere. . .and _we're_ not going home. Not yet," Arizona stated as she rolled onto her side to face her wife. Noticing the confusion etched into Callie's tired features, Arizona continued. "I saw your list."

"Arizona, I think maybe it's time," the Latina conceded.

"No Callie, not yet. I'm not ready yet. _We're_ not ready yet."

"You have to stop throwing that up in my face then, Arizona. Because I'm trying here. I'm really, really trying to make you happy. I'll do whatever you need. Whatever you need to make you happy, I will do it, but you need to let me in. Even if you're angry or upset, you need to let me in so I can help. You need to communicate and be honest with me even if you want to scream and yell at me about something that's upsetting you or making you angry," Callie paused, collecting her thoughts. "I know I'm not always the best at picking up on things, and I know that sometimes you're going to be reminded of. . .before, and that might make you angry or upset, and that's fine, but you have to tell me. You can't just expect me to always know."

Arizona nuzzled her nose into the crook of her wife's neck. "I promise, I really promise. I'll let you in. I'll talk to you, just please. . .please don't give up on me," she requested. "That's all I ask. . ."

"That's all?" Callie asked simply. Arizona only nodded in response . "Well, that's easy," the Latina smirked before gently kissing the corner of the blonde's mouth. "If that's all it takes to make you happy, then my job is simple. Because I'm not giving up, and I'm not going anywhere. . ."

* * *

AN3: As always, your continued comments and reviews are welcome!


	14. Chapter 14

**Title:** When It Don't Come Easy

**Author:** HandsThatHeal

**Beta:** Funkyshaz57

**Pairing:** Callie/Arizona

**Rating:** NC-17

**Summary:** After watching Arizona turn away from the people who love her most as she struggles both physically and emotionally to come to terms with the injuries she sustained in the plane crash, Callie decides to take matters into her own hands by embarking on a cross country adventure with Arizona and Sofia in hopes of reaffirming their love for each other and deciding if they have what it takes to carry on as a family.

**Disclaimer:** All television shows, books, movies, songs, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work and the characters, events, and settings thereof are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.

**AN: **Thank you for waiting patiently for this update. I'm so pleased that you are enjoying this story so much! Thanks for continuing to read and review.

**AN2**: Huge thank you to Funkyshaz57 for keeping me on task and for being such a great influence on this story.

* * *

**Chapter 14:**

"Oh my goodness, Arizona! She's gotten so big!" Barbara Robbins squealed when she met her daughter on the front porch of the lovely Cape Cod home she and Daniel had purchased upon moving to Rhode Island.

"I know," Arizona stated happily as she embraced her mother, Sofia clenched tightly on her right hip. "It's hard to believe she'll be two in just a few months," she mused as she kissed the toddler's cheek.

Barbara smiled, admiring the bond between Arizona and Sofia. "How are you feeling, sweetheart? How's your leg?"

Arizona shrugged, feeling suddenly unnerved and for some reason, slightly embarrassed by her mother's line of questioning. She had anticipated this to some extent, but was in no way prepared for the strong torrent of emotions that was currently threatening to take control of her entire being. This was the first time her parents were seeing her as an amputee, and she suddenly realized that that fact scared her to death. "I'm fine. . .it's fine," she replied shortly. "Not now, okay? Later. We'll talk later."

Noting the distress in her daughter's voice and the strained look in her blue eyes, Barbara decided to not press her to elaborate. She knew that forcing Arizona would only push her further away, but she also knew that she would come to her in her own time. "Where's Callie?" she asked in an attempt to appease her daughter's wishes as she took Sofia from her arms.

Arizona shifted uncomfortably, but plastered a smile onto her face as she pointed toward the giant vehicle now parked in her parents' driveway. "Umm. . .she's gathering some of Sofia's things from the RV," Arizona stated as she turned back toward her mother. "She'll be right here."

Barbara Robbins studied her daughter's face. "Everything alright between the two of you?" she asked, seeing right through the fake smile curling at her daughter's lips.

Arizona's smile faltered slightly upon seeing the knowing look in her mother's eyes, but quickly forced it to reemerge when her father stepped out the front door. "Hi dad," she said brightly as she quickly stepped around her mother.

"How are you, Arizona?" he asked after a quick embrace.

Arizona sighed as those unwanted emotions yet again threatened to take a merciless hold on her psyche. "I. . .I'm good," she replied with a nod.

"And look at you," Daniel said as he pulled Sofia from her grandmother's arms. "Arizona, she's grown three inches since we saw her a couple months ago," he stated with a smile. "You're getting to be such a big girl."

"Pop-pop!" Sofia squealed as she patted his cheeks with her hands.

Arizona and Barbara both chuckled as 'The Colonel' made silly faces at the toddler, bouncing her in his arms. "Take them inside, Daniel before Sofia catches a cold," Barbara urged. "Show Arizona around the house and where they'll be staying. I'm going to go see if Callie needs any help." Daniel eyed his wife curiously. "I'll be right back."

"Mom," Arizona warned. "She's. . ."

"_She_ may need help carrying things, Arizona. I know what it's like to have a baby," Barbara insisted, shooing them toward the door. "Now go inside with your father."

Arizona eyed her mother sternly. "Just don't. . ."

"Don't what?" Barbara asked incredulously. "Help your wife? That's rude, Arizona, and I'm sure your father and I taught you better than that," she replied as she quickly rushed down the porch stairs, refusing Arizona a chance for rebuttal.

Knocking briefly, Barbara pushed open the door, looking around the expanse of the vehicle for her daughter-in-law. "Callie?" she called. "Do you need some help, dear?"

Receiving no response, Barbara shuffled through the cabin, admiring the elegance and style of the mobile home. "Callie?" she called again from where she stood outside the bedroom door. Hearing movement behind it, she knocked softly. "Callie? Do you need help with anything?"

The door opened abruptly to reveal a frazzled looking Latina. "Barbara! Oh, hey," Callie stated in a rush. "Sorry. I was just trying to get some of our things together to bring into the house."

Barbara watched as her daughter-in-law lugged a large suitcase toward the exit of the RV. "You okay?" she asked. "Can I help you with anything?"

Callie shook her head. "No, I'm. . .okay. I'm fine. Thank you," she replied with a slight smile. "Just trying to. . ."

"What's going on, Callie?" Barbara asked matter-of-factly. The Latina's eyes widened as she studied her mother-in-law. "I wasn't born yesterday. I could tell from the moment Arizona set foot on the front porch that something was wrong. And now, here you are hiding out in this thing," she stated with a flourish of her hands.

Callie shrugged her shoulders. "Nothing's wrong. Not exactly. And I'm not hiding," she trailed off, looking toward the floor, worried that she had already said too much. Barbara was Arizona's mother and confidant, not hers, and Callie was sure there was some unwritten law somewhere that said talking to your mother-in-law about these kinds of things was certainly punishable by death.

"Calliope Torres!" Barbara chastised, her tone instantly setting Callie on high alert. "Arizona's a tough one. I've known her for thirty-five years, and it's taken me that long to be able to read her, but you. . .you wear your heart on your sleeve. I've only known you for a few years, and I can already read you like a book."

Callie opened her mouth to speak several times, but could form no words. "I. . .it's. . .we. . ."

"You can tell me, Callie," Barbara insisted gently as she sat at the dining table. "You're my daughter now, too."

Callie stood momentarily, watching as Barbara admired the map of the United States that she and Sofia had filled with stickers. Sighing, she stepped closer and slowly slid into the seat across from Barbara. "Nothing's wrong," she admitted hesitantly. "Not exactly," she further stated. "It's just that we've had a few. . .tense. . .moments lately. We're both just trying to figure things out."

Barbara watched the younger woman with care and concern in her eyes. "How is she doing?' she asked.

Callie considered her words, a slight smile creeping onto her face. "Better. Really, she's doing so much better."

"I'm glad to hear that," Barbara replied immediately. "I know she's a grown woman, but she's still my baby. She doesn't call much anymore, but when she does, she seems happy some days, but others. . ." Barbara trailed off, sadness creeping into her blue eyes.

"Yeah," Callie nodded in agreement. "Unfortunately, that's pretty much what we've been dealing with. It's gotten better, though. In the beginning, I never knew which Arizona I'd be faced with from one minute to the next. Then we had good hours that turned into good days. On this trip, we've actually even had a good week, but it's definitely been difficult at times."

"I thought things were getting better. She told me about the trip to see Teddy and taking Sofia to the park and the dancing. "

Callie smiled slightly at the memory. "Yeah, we've had some really great times on this trip. . .but also some really awful ones. . ." Her face fell. "It's just so hard sometimes."

"Please don't give up on her, Callie."

Callie was struck by Barbara's words. Did every member of the Robbins family think she was just going to give up and walk away from Arizona? "I'm not going anywhere," Callie stated flatly, slightly irritated by the assumption. Considering her words, she nervously fiddled with her fingernails. "We ran into some. . .issues a few days ago in Chicago. We talked about it, and I thought things were okay. I mean, we had a wonderful time in Niagara Falls after that, but for the past couple days of driving, she's just kind of removed herself. . .she's gone inside herself."

Barbara nodded in understanding. "That's how she's always been. She internalizes all her thoughts and fears and chooses to process things on her own even when she is surrounded by people who love her and are willing to help her."

"I hate it," Callie admitted without hesitation. "I'd rather she scream and yell at me, and trust me, there's been a lot of that. But, the silence. I can't handle the silence."

Barbara regarded her daughter-in-law with concern in her eyes. "Callie. . ."

"I'm sorry. That was a lot," Callie said sheepishly. Standing from her seat, she moved nervously around the vehicle, gathering some of Sofia's toys to take with her into the Robbins' home. "I didn't mean to put that all on you. I shouldn't be telling you all of this."

"You don't have to apologize. I knew she wouldn't tell me, so I came to you," Barbara replied as she too stood from her chair. "You saved my daughter's life, Callie, and I will never be able to thank you enough for that."

Callie lowered the toys she held in her arms to the floor when she saw tears well up in her mother-in-law's eyes. "Oh, I. . .I didn't mean to make you cry. Please don't cry," she said as she stepped in from of her.

Barbara waved her off, struggling to find words. "It's not you," she replied, brushing the tears from her cheeks. "When you called to tell us that Arizona's plane was missing, I just knew they were going to find them. They had to, Callie, because I couldn't bear to lose two children," Barbara softly admitted. Stepping closer, Callie placed a gentle hand onto her arm in an attempt to comfort her. "Then you let us know that they had been rescued, and when we left Seattle when Arizona's infection finally began to improve, I was sure everything was going to be fine," she smiled slightly through her tears. "But then, you called to tell us about the amputation. I'm so, so happy she's alive, but I feel so cheated. It's irrational, I know, but since then, I just keep thinking about when she was a baby," Barbara shook her head. "We lost Timothy. . .no mother should ever have to endure that loss, Callie. But Arizona's alive, and all I keep thinking about is how, when she was a baby, I would tickle and play with her little toes. "

Tears sprung to Callie's eyes as she thought about doing the exact same thing to Sofia - about how she would playfully nip at freshly bathed toes while she dressed her daughter in her pajamas for the night. Callie looked to the ceiling in an attempt to blink back her tears as she placed a hand on each of Barbara's arms. Taking a deep breath, she met her gaze. "I'm so sorry. I never even considered how hard this would be for you. I can't even imagine. If Sofia. . ."

"Please, let's not even think about that," Barbara insisted with a slight smile. "She's beautiful and healthy and just the cutest thing I've ever seen." Callie smiled at the older woman, delighted and grateful that she was a part of her daughter's life. "We're going to get through this, Callie. All of us. Together," Barbara insisted as she reached up to give her a hug. "I know she's been through a lot, and this has to be incredibly devastating, but a part of me also thinks we just need to figure out how to make my daughter get her stubborn head out of her ass."

Callie smirked, surprised by the candor in Barbara's statement. "I've been thinking about that, and I have a few ideas, but I'm going to need your help."

"This sounds interesting," Barbara replied conspiratorially as she grabbed the toys that Callie had left deserted on the floor. "I'll do anything to make my baby girl smile again."

"Trust me," Callie said as she pulled the large suitcase out the door and down the steps. "That's all I want."

Barbara smiled. "Come on," she said as she urged Callie across the driveway and toward the front door. "Let's get inside before Daniel thinks we've defected and sends a Marine Fighter Attack Squadron looking for us."

* * *

Later that night, Callie sat up in bed, her back resting on pillows stacked against the headboard in the guest bedroom of the Robbins' home. Arizona smirked when she entered from the bathroom, amused by the look of concentration on her wife's face as she typed furiously against the keys of her laptop, bright white teeth gnawing at her bottom lip.

Arizona sighed as she settled her weary body under the covers, the side of her arm brushing against the outside of Callie's pajama clad thigh. "Sorry," Callie said absentmindedly. "I'll turn off the light in just a minute. I'm trying to find the recipe for the stuffing your dad liked last year. I thought I got it from the Food Network website, but I can't remember which chef it was from."

Arizona stared at the ceiling, scrunching her face as she tried to remember. "I think we saw it on Paula Deen, but you thought it would be too heavy, so you substituted some ingredients from a Rachel Ray recipe."

"Oh, God. You're right," Callie exclaimed, quickly looking toward the pack-and-play where Sofia lay sleeping. Certain her outcry hadn't awakened the sleeping toddler, she turned back toward the computer. "Shit," she hissed. "I'll never be able to duplicate that."

Arizona chuckled. "It'll be fine, Callie. My dad will never know the difference."

Callie wasn't convinced and went about searching the internet until she was sure she had found the two recipes she had combined. Happily bookmarking the pages, she closed her laptop before setting it aside and sliding down under the covers to lie next to her wife. They both lay in the silence of the dark bedroom, their bare shoulders touching slightly. "You know, I know you and my mom were talking about me earlier. So, you might as well go ahead and tell me," Arizona stated matter-of-factly.

Callie's eyes shifted toward Arizona. "We weren't really talking about you," Callie hesitantly replied.

"Spill, Calliope."

Callie sighed as she turned onto her side, leaning up on her elbow to look down at the wife. "She's just worried about you, that's all," Callie replied when she met her wife's knowing gaze. Realizing from the look in Arizona's eyes that she couldn't get away with supplying such little information, Callie sighed. "She said you don't call as much anymore, and when you do, sometimes you seem happy, but other times, not so much. She wanted to know how we are doing, and I just told her that we are doing better, but that you had been kind of. . .pensive for the past couple of days, and I wasn't sure why."

Arizona rolled onto her side to face her wife. Propping herself up to her level, Arizona reached her other hand out to stroke the side of Callie's face. "It's not you," she admitted after a while. "I promise, Callie. It's just. . ."

Callie watched Arizona's face fall, her eyes locking onto the striped design on the sheet beneath them. "Talk to me, sweetie," Callie softly urged as she hooked her fingers under her wife's chin, pulling her face up so she could look into her brilliant blue eyes. "You can tell me anything."

Arizona shook her head, her eyes falling shut. "It's my dad," she admitted as her eyes fluttered open, unshed tears collecting uncontrollably. Noting the concern and uncertainty on her wife's face, she continued. "I've spent the last couple days wondering how I'm going to spend the rest of my life meeting new people every day who are going to see me for the first time," Arizona paused, her words making little sense to her own mind. "That made more sense in my head," she admitted with a slight smile.

Callie returned the smile, reaching out to brush away a tear that escaped down her cheek with a swipe of her thumb.

"It's easier with my mom, because she's my mom, you know. I can confide in her. I can tell her anything. Maybe not at the exact moment she wants me to, but eventually, when I'm ready, I can always talk to her. She understands the real me, but my dad. . .I've always had to be tough around him," Arizona admitted. "Maybe it's because he's a Marine or maybe he was just never able to differentiate the difference between being a boy's dad versus being a girl's dad, I don't know. But, he always told Tim and me that we needed to be in control of our thoughts and feelings and take charge of emotions."

"I thought that you'd always gotten along with you dad," Callie stated in confusion.

"We don't _not_get along. It's not that at all. It's just that he has these expectations. He raised Tim and me to be good men in a storm, to protect the things we love, and to control our emotions and suppress what comes naturally. That's been so difficult to do lately, and I'm afraid that I've let him down."

"You haven't let anyone down, Arizona," Callie replied honestly. "Not me, not Sofia, and certainly not your mom or dad. Your emotions are a real and honest part of you and make you who you are. No one can fault you for that."

"I know," Arizona huffed as she flopped onto her back, the tips of her fingers massaging her temples. "I just really need to continue being the person he raised me to be, so I spent the last couple days trying to anticipate how I would react when he saw me for the first time. I was trying to figure out how to spend every day as if I'm the same person, when I know he views me differently now."

Callie leaned forward to gently kiss her wife's cheek. "I think you're underestimating yourself, Arizona," she stated sincerely. "And your dad, too. I know you want to move on, we all do. But, you can't just pretend like everything's the same."

"What am I supposed to do, then?"

"Just be honest with him. Sit down and have a conversation."

"Ugh," Arizona pouted. "I knew you were going to say that. I hate you."

"That's because I'm right," Callie smiled as she settled her head onto Arizona's shoulder. "And I'm awesome."

* * *

Arizona awoke the following morning, cocooned in the familiar scents of her childhood, a strong tanned arm wrapped securely around her torso from behind. Lacing her own fingers through the ones draped over her side, she scooted backward, burrowing herself further into the safety of her wife's embrace. Inhaling deeply, she was struck by the familiarity of this new home. When she was young, her family moved every eighteen months, but her parents always tried to make each and every new house seem like home. Her mom tried to keep things around their houses constant, right down to the laundry detergent and fabric softener she used, apparently to this very day. Taking another deep breath in, she rolled onto her back, taking a moment to study the woman lying beside her. Being able to be open and honest and talk to Callie about how she was feeling in regards to her father the previous night felt wonderful. She had no idea that seeing her parents for the first time since the amputation would be so difficult, and it felt nice to be able confide in her wife again. She knew this visit wouldn't necessarily be easy, but she had no idea she would be inundated with such a profound mix of conflicting emotions.

Seeing her mom yesterday was difficult, but when her dad stepped out the front door, she was immediately transported back to her childhood. Back to a time when she endeavored to be a straight A student, graduate valedictorian and go to college and then to medical school – back to a time when they taught her to be honorable, caring, respectful, and disciplined – back to a time when she would do anything and everything to delight her parents and remain in their good graces.

Sighing softly, Arizona gently kissed Callie's shoulder before placing a whisper of a kiss against her full lips. A gentle smile graced her face when she heard a soft contented moan leave her wife's mouth. Lifting the arm, heavy with sleep, that surrounded her body, she moved from the bed, donning her prosthesis and her pair of UGG boots before enveloping the upper half of her body in a soft hooded sweatshirt of Callie's. Content that Sofia was also still sleeping comfortably, Arizona quietly exited the room.

Wandering through the unfamiliar yet vastly recognizable surroundings of her parents' house, Arizona strolled into the kitchen, the inviting smell of freshly brewed coffee further awakening her sleep addled mind. Pouring herself a cup and adding just the right amount of cream and sugar, she continued her journey through the house admiring photos of herself and Tim, herself with Callie and Sofia, and various other items that signified integral stages of her parents' lives.

Stepping out onto the front porch, she leaned against a large column of the white porch railing as she sipped her coffee and breathed in a refreshing breath of the cool autumn air.

"Good morning, Arizona."

Spinning around quickly, she nearly lost her balance, but was able to stabilize herself by grasping onto the rail. "Holy shit, dad! You scared the crap out of me!" she exclaimed when she finally saw her father sitting on the porch swing. Steadying the coffee mug in her hand, she took a step forward. "I thought you'd be at work."

Daniel smiled, secretly pleased by the presence of his daughter's childlike words and phrases. "When we found you'd be joining us for Thanksgiving, I decided to take a few days off," he admitted, patting the wooden slats of the swing as an invitation for her to take a seat beside him. Arizona hesitated momentarily, uncertainty filling her mind. "Sit, Arizona," he insisted.

Pensively stepping toward him, she slowly lowered herself onto the swing, an obvious distance left between them. "I love the house," Arizona stated after a quiet moment, unsure if what else to say. "I've been thinking that Callie and I should get a house, so Sofia has a yard - a place to run."

"That little girl sure is a bundle of energy," Daniel mused. "You and Callie are doing such a wonderful job with her. She's smart, self-assured - she reminds me a lot of you at that age."

Arizona smiled uneasily, the impact of her father's words threatening to release the tidal wave of emotions she was trying so desperately to suppress. Averting his piercing blue eyes, identical to her own, she sighed, shifting uncomfortably in her seat. "When Callie called to tell us that your plane was missing. . ."

"Dad," Arizona interrupted, shaking her head, willing him to change the subject. "Please. . ."

"When she called us," he pushed on. "It was like nothing I've ever experienced before in my life. Not even when your brother. . ." Daniel trailed off, clearing his throat in an attempt to gather his thoughts. "With Timothy, the risk was always there. It's just the nature of the job. I'm not saying it wasn't painful, I just mean that when a father hears that his daughter, a Pediatric Surgeon, who should be safe in a hospital saving the lives of children - the only child he has left – is missing somewhere in the middle of the Rocky Mountains," Daniel paused, shaking his head. "Well, that's a lot to take in."

"I'm sorry," Arizona quietly replied, hanging her head as shame and guilt threatened to consume her.

Daniel shook his head. "You have nothing to be sorry for, Arizona. Sometimes bad things happen to good people – really good people. Just like with Timothy."

"Timothy was the best," she stated earnestly, once again meeting her father's gaze.

"Both of my children are the best."

Not convinced, Arizona tilted her head to the side, studying her father's face. "I've been so worried about what you were going to think of me – how you would feel about me being – less than whole – less than who you raised me to be."

"Less than whole?" Daniel questioned. "Just because you lost your leg, doesn't make you less of anything. You're still fundamentally the same capable, talented, and accomplished person I raised you to be. It's a process, Arizona, and it's okay to grieve. Your life is never going to be the same. People are going to stare and say ridiculous things, but it's up to you to be able to overcome that. I taught you to have a positive attitude and to control your emotions."

"I can't, Dad!" Arizona huffed, the volume of her own voice emitting more loudly than she had anticipated. "I can't control my emotions when it comes to this. Sometimes I'm fine, but then others I'm pissed and scared and want to hit something."

"Then be pissed. Be scared. Hit something," Daniel insisted. "Just not Callie or Sofia," he half-heartedly teased, trying to diffuse the anger rising within his daughter. "I'm not saying that you should pretend that nothing has changed. I just mean that you are strong enough to get through this, and when you can't do it on your own, you have me and your mother, and Callie and Sofia. We all love you, Arizona. You aren't in this alone."

"You aren't disappointed in me?" she asked, her voice sounding small and almost childlike.

"Disappointed?" Daniel asked, clearly confused. "Arizona, how could I be disappointed in you?"

"I. . .I'm not who you raised me to be anymore. I'm not a _good man in a storm_, and I can't protect the things I love. I feel so useless sometimes, and I'm so afraid that I've let you and everyone else down," Arizona finally admitted, her voice strained as she struggled to combat the tears that threatened to fall.

"Oh, Arizona," Daniel stated warmly, as he uncharacteristically gathered her into his arms. "You haven't let anyone down, and no one is disappointed in you." With these words and the simple gesture of his loving embrace, the damn broke as the tears flowed from her eyes. "You're right; you're not the person I raised you to be. You're so much better than that person – I just wish you could see that like everyone else does."

Arizona clung to her father, unable to let go. She wasn't sure of the last time he had shown such outward affection, and for the moment it felt wonderful to be able to relax in his arms. Slowly pulling away, she began to feel embarrassed about her sudden display of emotions, turning her head as she wiped her eyes. "I. . .I'm sorry."

"Please stop apologizing," Daniel insisted. "I fear that I've misguided you, Arizona. I raised you to be strong and honorable – not a robot. Please don't ever be sorry for being who you are, because the Arizona Robbins I know and love is a really, _really _lovely person, and I'm proud to call her my daughter."

Arizona was unable to stop the dimpled smile that broke through her tears. "Thank you, Dad," she replied sheepishly as she gave him another quick hug. "I'm really proud to _be _your daughter."

* * *

The next two days disappeared in a flurry of grocery shopping, baking, and meal preparation as Callie and Barbara set about organizing a meal that once presented on the antique dining room table, could have elegantly graced the cover of a magazine. "This looks amazing," Arizona stated, as she winked at Callie. Grabbing her fork, she brought a bite of green beans toward her mouth, but halted suddenly when she heard her wife nervously clear her throat.

"Umm, would you mind if I said grace?" Callie asked as she self-consciously looked around the table at the faces staring back at her.

"Of course not, dear. I think that would be lovely," Barbara replied. "Fork down, Arizona."

Joining hands, they bowed their heads. "Dear God, I. . ._we_ have a lot to be thankful for today. You have given us so much, and we are richly blessed. We confess our thanks to you on this day, because there _could_be not just one, but two empty places at our table right now, and for that, we are sincerely grateful and forever indebted to you."

Arizona slowly opened her eyes, curiously looking toward her wife.

"Lord, we know that you use difficulties and struggles to draw us closer to you and to each other. Through this, you help us understand and remember what we have lost, but more importantly you encourage us to cherish and appreciate what we have gained. Thank you for all your blessings great and small. Thank you for being with us during all of our joys and all of our sorrows, for your comfort in our times of sadness and your guidance in our times of need. Thank you, Lord, for sending us grace during the most difficult times in our lives and for guiding us through the darkness and into the light."

Arizona was unable to stop the lone tear that escaped her eye when she felt Callie grip her hand more firmly. Once again closing her eyes, she bowed her head as her wife continued.

"Today, Lord, I thank you for Arizona and for Sofia and for the family we have gathered here. May we open our hearts to your love and live this day and everyday conscious of all that has been given to us. Amen."

Dropping their joined hands, Arizona quickly wiped her eyes as Callie sheepishly glanced toward her. Leaning over in her chair, Callie gently kissed her cheek, nuzzling her nose against Arizona's ear. "I love you," she whispered.

Pulling back from her wife, Arizona stared into her deep brown soulful eyes. "I love you, too."

* * *

"What? Wait! Where are you three going?" Arizona demanded, as she followed her mother and wife, who was carrying Sofia, down the stairs the following morning.

"Just a little girl time, sweetheart," Barbara stated as she helped Sofia into her coat.

"Well what does that make me, then?" She huffed.

Callie stepped toward her, taking her hands into hers. "It makes you an amazingly beautiful woman who deserves a day of relaxation. Just rest, sweetie. We have a few errands to run, and then we'll be back before you know it. Okay?"

"Just give me twenty minutes, Calliope. I can be ready. . ."

"Not today, babe," Callie insisted as she slipped her arms into her leather jacket. "Just stay here, have some leftovers, watch football with your dad, or read a book. Relax. . .or do whatever else people do who aren't out and about on Black Friday."

"You're going shopping?" Arizona questioned. "Today? On Black Friday? The busiest shopping day of the year?"

"I didn't say that," Callie countered with a smile, checking her purse to make sure she had everything she needed.

"Come on, Callie," Barbara happily urged, already halfway out the door with Sofia in her arms. "You've said too much already, and she'll just keep badgering you if we don't hurry up and leave now."

"Mother!" Arizona warned, but she had already disappeared out the door with Sofia in tow.

"It's just a few hours, okay," Callie stated, a large smile on her face. "There's a pot of coffee waiting for you, and your dad's going to make you breakfast. We'll be right back. I promise."

"I know you're up to something, Calliope."

"I _know_you know I'm up to something," Callie admitted.

Arizona rolled her eyes. "I'm calling the police or. . .or the Marines if you're not back by like two o'clock," she replied.

Callie glanced toward a clock on the wall. "Okay," she sighed. "Fair enough."

Leaning forward, she pecked at Arizona's lips for a chaste goodbye kiss, but was surprised when hands snaked their way into the hair at the back of her head to return her endearment with greater fervor. "Not gonna work," Callie teased breathlessly when she was finally able to pull away.

"Fine!" Arizona relented. "Two o'clock, or I'm calling out the dogs."

Callie smiled as she pecked her lips one last time. "I love you," she stated with a wink, before gathering her belongings and quickly exiting the door.

As she watched the love of her life happily slip out the door, Arizona couldn't help the smile that dominated her face. It had been such a long time since their relationship had felt this carefree and easy.

Callie's Thanksgiving Prayer had only served to drive home how incredibly lucky she was to be alive and how lucky she was to be able to come home to her family. The past several months had been Hell on Earth, but she finally felt like they were stepping out of the darkness and into the light.

The talk with her father had gone a long way to change how she viewed herself in the aftermath of the plane crash. The way Callie admired her, the way her mother held Sofia, and the way her father stood proudly watching them, all just reinforced the fact that she had so much to live for, so much to be thankful for.

Settling onto the plush couch in the center of her parents' living room, steaming cup of coffee in one hand, remote control in the other, Arizona felt for the first time in a very long time that everything really was going to be okay.

* * *

**AN3: **What the heck could Callie and Barbara be up to? As always, your reviews and comments are most welcome!


	15. Chapter 15

**Title:** When It Don't Come Easy

**Author:** HandsThatHeal

**Beta:** Funkyshaz57

**Pairing:** Callie/Arizona

**Rating:** NC-17

**Summary:** After watching Arizona turn away from the people who love her most as she struggles both physically and emotionally to come to terms with the injuries she sustained in the plane crash, Callie decides to take matters into her own hands by embarking on a cross country adventure with Arizona and Sofia in hopes of reaffirming their love for each other and deciding if they have what it takes to carry on as a family.

**Disclaimer:** All television shows, books, movies, songs, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work and the characters, events, and settings thereof are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.

**AN: **Thank you so much for sticking around this long. The past few chapters have been fairly dark, but this one is much "lighter". I really hope you enjoy it - it's the longest chapter to date!

**AN2: **A huge thank you to Funkyshaz57 who has put up with me for this long, as well. You're the best!

* * *

**Chapter 15: **

_"It's 1:53pm. Tick tock, Calliope."_

_"Seriously, Arizona?"_

_"Well, these football games are boring. I've already had 2 pieces of pecan pie. Dad is no fun. I miss my girls."_

Callie smiled as she read the last text message, familiar, but recently absent butterflies, dancing inside of her. Fighting to hide the cheesy grin that broke out on her face as she loaded the last of the day's purchases into the back of Barbara's car, she then leaned against the car to type out her reply.

_"Are you sure you're ready for us to come home? You think you're up for what I have in store for you, Dr. Robbins?"_

_"We are NOT having sex in my parents' house with Sofia sleeping in the same room."_

Callie chuckled as she moved around the car, sliding into the passenger's seat. Grinning brightly, her thumbs moved effortlessly across the touch screen of her phone, secretly pleased that her wife's mind automatically jumped to sex.

"Is my daughter _sexting _you?" Barbara asked with a sly grin as she turned the key in the ignition.

Callie's eyes went wide at the question. "What the. . .I mean wait! What? No!" she stammered, the color rising in her cheeks.

_"Your mom wants to know if you're sexting me."_

"It's nothing to be embarrassed about, Callie. You're both extremely beautiful women," Barbara stated matter-of-factly as she navigated the car out of the parking lot.

_"What?! What did you say to her?"_

_"I didn't say anything."_

"She's not _sexting _me," Callie replied, turning her attention back to her mother-in-law. "She just wants to know when we'll be home. She's getting restless."

_"How does she even know what sexting is?"_

"Tell her to be patient," Barbara insisted, her right hand motioning toward Callie's phone. "She always has to know what's going on. She can't stand surprises."

"Tell me about it," Callie mused. Deciding to torture her wife a little for interrupting them with calls and texts for most of the day, Callie smirked as she typed her response.

_"I don't know. Maybe she and your dad enjoy a little sexting from time to time."_

_"OMG! Did you really have to go there?"_

_"Did you really have to call and text me all day?"_

_"Fine."_

_"Fine." _

Callie shook her head at their childish banter. "Do you really think she's going to like what I have planned?" she then asked, uncertainty creeping into her voice. "I mean, what if she hates it. What if it's not. . ."

"She's going to love it," Barbara interrupted Callie's nervous rambling.

"I hope so," Callie replied as she looked behind her toward a sleeping Sofia. "I just really need her to know how much she means to me."

"She knows," Barbara replied as she reached over to pat Callie's knee. "It's obvious by the way she looks at you."

"It's just that we've screwed up so many times," Callie hesitantly admitted. "We mess up, hurt one another, and then just sweep things under the rug. We don't talk. It's not a good thing, but it's just what we do."

"Well, then, I think it's time to change that. Your lives are never going to be the same, Callie. Why not make this change, too."

Callie smiled at her mother-in-law. "Yeah, it's like a whole new beginning for us. We need to. . ." Callie was interrupted when the phone she still held in her hand began to vibrate. Rolling her eyes, she flicked her thumb across the screen.

_"2:08pm. You're late."_

"Arizona?" Barbara asked knowingly.

"Arizona," Callie confirmed with a nod of her head.

_"Sorry, sweetie. We're running late. It's going to be another hour or so."_

_"Just swing by the house and pick me up. I'm bored, and I want to go, too."_

_"It's out of our way to come back and get you."_

_"I'm seriously starting to get pissed, Calliope!"_

_"Calm down, killer. We're pulling into the driveway right now."_

* * *

"You're kidding me, right?" Callie groaned from behind Arizona, her hands on either of her wife's arms guiding her toward the front door. "You complained all day long about wanting to go somewhere, and now you're not going to get into the car?"

"I want to know where we're going," Arizona huffed.

"Well, I'm not telling you where we're going," Callie retorted as she threaded Arizona's arms through the sleeves of her pea coat.

"I'm not great at surprises. I wish I was."

"Mmm hmm," Callie rolled her eyes.

"Just get in the car, Arizona," Daniel insisted as he opened the front door to shoo her out.

"What about Sofia?" Arizona asked.

"I raised two perfectly wonderful children, Arizona," Barbara replied as she bounced Sofia in her arms. "We'll be fine."

"Please just tell me we're not going camping," Arizona pouted. "I hate camping."

"Why the hell would I take you camping?" Callie asked, annoyance creeping into her voice as she guided her wife out the door and onto the front porch. "I already _know _you hate camping."

"Well, at least let me tell my baby goodbye," Arizona insisted. "Bye bye baby. Momma loves you," she said as she placed a loud smacking kiss on her daughter's cheek

Callie smiled as she did the same. "Love you big girl," she cooed before turning her attention back toward her near belligerent wife. "Come on, babe. We've got to go."

Arizona pouted again. "Just tell me where we're going. That's all I ask," she grumbled as Callie opened the passenger's side door of Barbara's car for her wife to slide in. Rolling her eyes, she grabbed the seat belt and fastened it around Arizona's waist. "I can buckle myself, Calliope. I'm not a child."

"Then stop acting like one," Callie retorted with a smug grin as she shut the door.

* * *

"You really aren't going to tell me where we're going?" Arizona asked after about fifteen minutes of driving in silence.

"Just relax, Arizona," Callie encouraged from her seat behind the wheel. "We only have about an hour left to go, and then you'll know. Let's talk about something else."

Arizona sighed, a smile gracing her lips. "Okay, Calliope," she relented. "What do you want to talk about?"

Callie glanced toward her wife. "Well, I guess I was just wondering where we go from here."

"What do you mean?" Arizona asked, concern and insecurity evident on her face.

"Nothing bad, sweetie," Callie reassured her. "I just mean. . .are you ready to go back to Seattle? Do you want to go back at all? We'll need to go back for Bailey's wedding, but we don't have to stay if you don't want," Callie offered in a rush of words. "We could relocate. There are tons of hospitals on the East Coast we could look into. You seem to be enjoying the time you're getting to spend with your parents, and Sofia is eating up all of the extra attention."

A smile lit up Arizona's face as she pictured her parents spoiling and fawning over Sofia like they had been since their arrival in Rhode Island. "If you recall correctly, Calliope, I was never ready to _leave_ Seattle."

"I _do_ recall," Callie replied, smirking as she looked from the road toward her wife. "I'm pretty sure getting you into the RV that night gives a whole new meaning to _drag her kicking and screaming_." Callie and Arizona both chuckled softly. Reaching her left hand toward her wife, Arizona gently stroked the top of the Latina's thigh. "It's been good, though. . .right?" Callie asked, the uncertainty evident in her voice.

"It's been _outstanding_," Arizona admitted without hesitation. "I may not have wanted to admit it at the time, Callie, but you were right. I wasn't _really_ ready to go back to work. I rushed things because I just wanted to pretend that everything was the same. That _I_ was the same."

"You _are_ the same, Arizona," Callie stated.

"Minus a leg and minus some self-confidence, but if you factor in the nightmares and panic attacks, maybe it all equals out," Arizona replied sarcastically.

"Arizona. . ."

"I'm _better_, Callie. But, I'll never be the _same_," Arizona specified. "You and I both know that."

Callie was surprised by her wife's candor, but was more amazed by the new found intensity and strength she found in her clear blue eyes. Smiling slightly, she brought the hand that rested on her thigh toward her mouth to place a kiss on the back of it.

They sat in silence for a few more miles before Arizona once again spoke. "I need to go back to Seattle, Callie. Not today, but when we're finished with this trip, I want to go back. I don't want to run," she stated adamantly. "It's where I met you. The place we fell in love; the place I became a mother. It's our home, Callie, and I want to go back."

Callie held Arizona's hand over her heart. "Me, too," she replied softly. "I want to go _home_, too.

* * *

"Oh my God, Calliope!" Arizona squealed as she exited the vehicle. "This is where we're staying?"

"Uh huh," Callie stated proudly. "Wequassett is the finest resort on Cape Cod."

"It's beautiful," Arizona admitted as she stepped toward her wife. "Thank you," she stated as she leaned forward to briefly brush her lips against Callie's.

"For what?" Callie asked as she wrapped her arms around Arizona's waist.

"For this little getaway. For the entire trip," Arizona smiled. "For _everything_."

Callie returned her wife's smile as she leaned forward to peck at her lips. "Come on," she said, pulling away and grabbing garment bags and luggage from the back seat of the car. "We need to get checked in. We have reservations in less than two hours."

Fifteen minutes later, they entered the Round Cove Suite, their home away from home. . .away from. . .home for the next few days. "Oh my!" Arizona gasped, as she walked from room to room, taking in the luxurious suite with a spacious parlor, king size bed, walk-in shower, over- sized jacuzzi, and gas fireplace. "Seriously, Calliope," she stated when she walked back into the bedroom, where Callie stood, unpacking a few items from their bag. "Are we going to have _any_ money left when we get back to Seattle?"

"Maybe a couple dollars," Callie teased with a shrug of her shoulders.

"Come on, Callie. I'm not an idiot. I know this is probably like a thousand dollar a night room, and the RV probably cost like a million dollars."

"Not a _million_ dollars," Callie smiled, as she escaped into the bathroom with a bag full of toiletries, turning on the water to take a quick shower.

"I'm serious, Calliope."

Stepping toward her wife, Callie pulled her own shirt over her head. "Look," she began as she reached for the hem of Arizona's shirt. "I paid for the RV with the money from my trust fund, and I figured we'd just sell it when we got back to Seattle, anyway." Callie pulled Arizona's shirt over her head. "So, then we can throw whatever money we sell it for back into the trust. No big deal," she murmured into her wife's ear.

Arizona pulled away, not distracted by her wife's seductive advances. "And the room?"

"Stop it, Arizona. You're acting like we're unemployed and living on the street in a cardboard box, or something. And besides, Daddy knows the owner," she shrugged as she removed her own bra, nimble fingers moving to the button of her jeans. "So, like I said. . .No. Big. Deal. Please just relax and enjoy yourself."

Arizona sighed, her gaze dropping to the full breasts in front of her. Subconsciously licking her lips, she reached for them, only to have her hands quickly batted away. "Not now," Callie scolded, the wide grin on her face betraying her words. "We've got reservations at this amazing French Restaurant, so we need to hurry."

Arizona stuck out her bottom lip, pouting as she removed her own bra. "Can I at least take a shower with you?"

"Do you really have to ask?"

* * *

"You ready to go?" Callie called as she walked back into the bedroom from the parlor, her fingers adjusting the earring in her left ear.

Arizona jumped at the voice, her thoughts a million miles away as she stared at her clothing options laid out on the bed. Closing her eyes, she shook her head. "Sorry, I just. . need a minute. I mean. . .I'm ready. . .I just need to decide what to wear," she stammered, unshed tears gathering in her now open eyes.

"Hey, hey, hey. What's wrong?" Callie asked, the concern evident in her voice as she quickly stepped closer to her wife.

"You look really pretty," Arizona whispered, tilting her head to the side.

"Talk to me, sweetie," Callie insisted, taking trembling hands into her own.

"You bought me a dress to wear. I can't wear a dress, Calliope," Arizona dejectedly admitted.

Callie squeezed her hands before stepping closer to the bed. "I got you this super-hot pants outfit because I thought you might not be ready for a dress, but I bought the dress, too because I thought you'd look spectacular in it _and_ because I want you to know that you could be wearing a garbage bag, and I'd still find you breathtaking," Callie replied honestly.

"But you're wearing a dress, and you look _amazing_," Arizona countered, her insecurity and anxiety still clear.

"And you'll look _amazing_ if you wear the dress I got you, too. But, if you decide to wear the pants, you'll _still _look beautiful. If it helps, I'll change. I'll wear pants. Just give me a second," Callie stated, scurrying toward the closet to find another option to wear.

"No, wait!" Arizona asserted. "Don't change." Callie turned back toward her wife from where she stood in the walk-in closet. "Callie. . ."

Callie nervously cleared her throat. "I didn't get a longer dress because I thought it might. . .trip you up, and I didn't want to just get the pants, because I thought you might think that I'm ashamed of you or something," Callie softly rambled as she sat on the edge of the bed in front of her wife. Taking the blonde's hands, she looked up into misty blue eyes. "So, I got this dress, too, because it honestly doesn't matter to me, Arizona. I know it's short, but I'm not bothered by your prosthesis, and I need you to understand that."

"But, I _am_, Calliope," Arizona stated as she sat down beside her.

"I know you are," Callie replied. "And that's okay."

"Really?"

"Yes, babe," Callie replied as she leaned over to kiss her cheek. "It's okay."

Arizona took a deep breath in an attempt to calm her nerves. "So, I'm going to wear the pants," she relented.

"So, you're going to wear the pants," Callie repeated. "And you're going to look _stunning_."

* * *

"Everything looks amazing," Arizona stated as she continued to peruse her menu. "But, I think we're going to share a bowl of the creole lobster bisque with basil whipped cream, and then I'll have. . ." she bit her bottom lip, still trying to decide from the list of wonderful options. ". . .the seared cape scallops with corn risotto, and mushroom and corn ravioli."

"And for you Madame?" the waiter asked, turning his attention toward Callie.

"I'm going to have the marinated grilled duck breast, spicy field salad and duck confit with blackberry balsamic duck sauce," Callie smiled as she closed her menu. "Oh, and we'll talk a bottle of the Trimbach Clos Ste Hune Riesling."

"Very well," the waiter replied as he took his leave. "The sommelier will bring your wine to the table momentarily."

Both women smiled as the waiter walked away before turning their attention back toward the other. "Excellent choice of outfit tonight, babe," Callie smirked as she took a sip from her water glass, her eyes drifting toward the plunging neck line of the black blouse her wife was wearing.

"Thank you, Calliope," Arizona replied shyly, taking a sip from her own glass.

The wine was soon delivered to their table, followed by their soup, and then their entrées. As they enjoyed their meals, sharing bites from the other's plate, their conversation flowed freely from Sofia and her parents to Bailey's impending nuptials and their eventual return to Seattle Grace Mercy West. Taking a last bite from her dinner, Arizona smiled as she put down her fork, before leaning back in her seat, a contented sigh escaping her lips. Smiling at her wife, she took another sip from her wine glass. "You may have to carry me out of here," Arizona teased. "I'm not sure I'll be able to walk after eating all of that."

Callie smiled, finishing the last of the wine in her glass. "You didn't save room for dessert?" she asked as she offered the wine bottle to her wife, silently asking if she'd like some more.

When Arizona held up her hand, Callie poured the little remaining into her own glass. "I just assumed I'd be having _you _for dessert," Arizona whispered seductively as she leaned forward, resting her arms on the table.

Callie blushed slightly as she drank the last of her wine. "Not so fast," she chuckled. "I didn't bring you to the best four star restaurant on Cape Cod for the most delicious French food just to have you rip off my clothes."

Arizona's face broke out into a dimpled grin. "Why did you bring me here, Calliope?" she asked as she sat back in her seat.

Callie cleared her throat, suddenly nervous. Moving her chair from across the table to sit closer to her wife, she blew out staggering breath. "I have something. . .to ask you," she began.

"Oh. . .okay," Arizona replied, her own nerves rising within her, her cheeks suddenly warm.

Callie sighed as she gathered her thoughts. "Arizona, we're our own worst enemy," she began with a slight shake of her head.

Noting the look of confusion on her wife's face, Callie held up a finger. "Wait, there's more," she smiled softly. "We've hurt one another so many times, and instead of talking about it, we just sweep things under the rug," she continued. "I don't want to do that anymore, so I need to tell you that I _know_ that I've hurt you."

"Callie. . ."

"I've got this all worked out in my head, Arizona. So please let me finish," she softly requested as she took her wife's hands into hers. At the blonde's slight nod, she steeled herself to continue. "So many times, I put. . .Mark before you, and I think I did that because I was so afraid of being hurt, because you know as well as I do that not only have I hurt you, but you've done the same to me." Callie shook her head at the memories. "But, when you were missing, Arizona, I realized that none of that really mattered anymore. So, I made a vow with God that if He brought you back to me, I would somehow make it up to you. I promised him that I would change because you deserve the very best, someone who will back you up without limits, let you grow without borders, and love you without end."

"I'm so, _so _sorry, Calliope," Arizona interrupted, a tear streaking down her face. "I'm sorry for bailing, I'm sorry for Africa, I'm sorry for the things I said to you after my leg. . ." she trailed off, quickly wiping her eyes. "I was just so hurt and so angry and in so much pain that I said a lot of things that I really didn't mean."

"I know," Callie replied as she squeezed Arizona's hands. "But thank you for saying that," she admitted, leaning forward to kiss her cheek. Taking another deep breath, she brought one of Arizona's hands to her lips, placing a gentle kiss on the back of it. "Arizona, I'm pretty sure I fell in love with you the moment you kissed me at Joe's. You complete me in every way, and I want to share every moment of my life with you. _Life_ has already offered us _so_ many challenges, but somehow we've made it here, to this place. . .together. We were lucky enough to have found each other in the first place, and I promise you, no one will work harder to make you happy or cherish you more than me."

Reaching into her bag, Callie pulled out three manila envelopes. Resting them on her own lap, she continued. "I promise to take care of you, and I will try my damndest to _never_ make you cry again. I promise to never leave you alone, Arizona, because when I look into your beautiful blue eyes, all I can see is the reflection of the two of us and the life I hope we'll continue to share together."

Arizona sat quietly, touched and in awe of the sincere words that had just spilled from her wife's mouth. "Arizona," Callie smiled brightly, gazing lovingly into her wife's eyes. "Will you _legally_ marry me?"

Arizona sighed heavily, her eyes looking toward the ceiling in an attempt to stave off the flood of tears that were threatening to fall. "Yes, Calliope, yes. I would love to _legally_ marry you," she finally answered with a bright smile, as she stared back into Callie's soulful eyes.

Callie returned a megawatt smile and exhaled the breath she didn't realize she was holding. Reaching forward, she offered Arizona the first envelope she held in her hand. "We already have rings, so I thought _this _would be the best way to show you how committed I am to you."

Taking the envelope into her trembling hands, Arizona lifted the flap, pulling what looked like a legal document from within. Glancing from her wife to the words on the top of the paper, Arizona softly gasped when the meaning filtered into her brain.

_PETITION FOR SECOND PARENT ADOPTION_

"Callie. . ."

"I know you've wanted this piece of paper for a long time, and we always said we were going to do it, but we never actually did it," Callie said, searching her wife's face for a reaction. "Mark will always be Sofia's father, but he's gone now. His absence isn't the reason I'm doing this, though. I'm doing this because you _are _Sofia's mother. She has always been yours, and you deserve to be recognized as such. She's your baby, Arizona, and you're her momma."

"Thank you," Arizona stated, her voice barely above a whisper.

"No, thank _you_," Callie countered. "Because without you, _our _little girl wouldn't even be here," she said as she leaned forward to gently brush her lips against those of her wife. "The paperwork is all filled out," she stated when she pulled away. "All you have to do is sign, and then we'll meet with the lawyer when we get back to Seattle. They'll send a social worker, and I think there's a hearing, but I'm sure everything will work out."

Arizona stared at her wife in amazement. "Do I even want to know what's in the other two envelopes? Because I don't think anything could top what I'm holding in my hand right now."

Callie grinned brightly. "Well, this one," she murmured as she playfully teased her wife, refusing to let her grab onto the envelope. "Is the paperwork for. . ."

Arizona quickly swiped the envelope from her wife's grasp, tearing into it like a present on Christmas morning.

_NOTICE OF INTENTION OF MARRIAGE_

"Oh my God," she breathed out. "You already have the paperwork? What if I had said no?" she teased.

"I had a feeling you wouldn't, so I took a chance," Callie beamed. "If you want. . .while we're in Massachusetts, we can apply and then after three days, we can have a small ceremony at Wequassett or just go to the Justice of the Peace." Uncertainty set in when Arizona didn't immediately respond. "Unless you're totally hating the idea. . .which would be okay, too," Callie stammered. "I'll just have to call your parents and cancel the. . ."

"You told my parents?!" Arizona questioned, her voice rising higher than appropriate for their surroundings. "Before you talked to me?"

"I told your mom. . .well, actually, she harassed me until _I_ told her. In my defense, though, she's like a damn secret agent specializing in espionage, or something," Callie replied with a roll of her eyes. After a moment, she continued. "So you _don't_ want to go ahead and. . ."

"Of course I do, Calliope," Arizona replied honestly. "I'm just trying to decide if I want to go to the Justice of the Peace or have another ceremony. I was pretty fond of our first wedding."

"Me too," Callie admitted with a shy grin. "I hoped you'd say that, so I scheduled an appointment with the Justice of the Peace for 5:00pm Thursday evening."

"Is there anything you didn't think of?" Arizona asked, the surprise evident in her voice as she glanced over the paperwork in her hand. "You must have been _really_ sure I'd say yes."

Callie leaned forward, grabbing the second envelope from Arizona's grasp. "Before you get engrossed in all that lovely legal jargon, I have one more envelope for you to open."

"I'm not sure I can handle anything else, tonight," Arizona stated, only half-heartedly teasing. Truth be told, she was pretty emotionally overwhelmed at this point in their evening. The fact that Callie had taken the lead and orchestrated all of this was fairly mind boggling.

"Okay," Callie relented, a teasing glint in her eye. "I can give it to you some other time. No rush. I'll just get the check," she continued, motioning for the waiter as she moved to place the envelope back in her purse.

"Okay, I changed my mind," Arizona practically squealed as she leaned over, quickly grabbing the last envelope before it disappeared into her wife's hand bag. "I can probably handle just _one_ more surprise."

"What if I have something planned for you once we get back to the room?" Callie purred seductively as she watched her wife fiddle with the flap of the envelope.

"For _that, _I can make an exception," Arizona replied, before turning her attention back to the item in her hand. Taking a deep breath, she stared into Callie's twinkling eyes.

"If you're going to open it, then open it," the Latina urged. "I promise, it's not going to jump out and bite you." Arizona slowly pulled the papers from the envelope until just the top was visible above its opening. "_When_ we get back to Seattle," Callie explained, "we're going to get a house. I contacted the realtor Owen used when he was selling the fire station, and she sent me a list of all the houses in our price range that are within fifteen minutes of the hospital."

Arizona slipped the papers back into their confinement before slowly handing it back to her wife. "Calliope Torres, you're making all of my dreams come true. I don't think this night could get any better," she responded, leaning forward to pull her into a tight hug.

"This night is far from over," Callie stated as she returned her wife's embrace. "And trust me," she husked, before gently nipping at the shell of her ear. "It's going to get _so _much better."

* * *

Arizona took Callie's hand in hers as she led them down the hallway toward their suite. Letting go only long enough for Callie to unlock the door in order to let them into the room, Arizona then sat her purse down on the dining room table as Callie kicked off her shoes. Turning back toward her wife, she once again took Callie's hand as she pulled abruptly towards her. The closer she got to her, the more Arizona could see the unadulterated love and lust present in her deep brown eyes.

"Thank you for tonight," she whispered before kissing her softly on the cheek.

"You're welcome," Callie stated simply as she lay a gently kiss on the side of Arizona's mouth, her hand moving to cup the side of her face.

Arizona gently turned her mouth toward Callie's, their lips fully coming together in a passionate tryst of moist lips and insistent tongues. As the kiss intensified, electricity surged through both of their bodies, their want and need increasing with every kiss and every touch as Arizona slipped her hands up Callie's thighs, bunching the short skirt of her dress around her waist. "No underwear, Calliope?" Arizona asked in surprise.

"I knew you'd just be tearing them off of me anyway, so I didn't even bother," Callie smirked as she raised her hands above her head for Arizona to completely remove the dress from her body.

Callie shivered with the change of temperature and the exquisite feeling of Arizona's lips on the sensitive skin covering her clavicle. Throwing her head back on her shoulders, allowing her wife greater access to her neck, Callie realized that they hadn't actually made love in almost two weeks – not since the night when they faltered as Arizona had inadvertently touched Callie intimately with her residual limb.

As Arizona's kisses grew more passionate, Callie's became more passive. Pulling back to look in her eyes to gauge how she was feeling, Arizona asked, "You okay?" Remaining silent, Callie nodded her response, a wicked grin forming on her face as she pushed aside her insecurities from the night of their last sexual encounter to the furthest recesses of her mind.

Pulling Callie closer to her, Arizona reached behind her to unfasten the clasp of her bra before slowly lowering it down her arms and completely off her body. Tossing it aside, Arizona then gripped her ass, pressing their centers more firmly together. Desperate to take control of their love making after everything Callie had done for her this evening, Arizona pressed her wife further into the room, until the edge of the bed met the back of Callie's bare legs. Pushing against strong shoulder, Arizona fell on top of her, kissing her more passionately than before as Callie's back harshly landed on top of the firm mattress.

Rolling on top of her, Callie felt a fresh wave of excitement wash over her when the plunging neckline of Arizona's top revealed to her breathtaking cleavage between ample breasts. As she nuzzled her nose and lips between the valley of her wife's breasts, Callie's hands moved to the hem of her silky shirt, quickly pushing it up and over her head. Leaving a trail of moist, hot kisses down Arizona's body, she quickly left the bed to kneel between her legs in order to make quick work of the button and zipper securing her pants, as she removed them, along with her black lace panties, from her body.

"Do you want me to. . ."

"Leave it! Just leave it," came Arizona's breathless reply and she scooted back toward the center of the bed. Crawling in between her wife's legs, Callie was completely taken by surprise when Arizona flipped them over in one fluid motion.

Holding her weight with her hands, Arizona struggled to lift her left leg in order to straddle Callie's right thigh. Finally succeeding, she pressed her right knee between the Latina's thighs, feeling the heat emanating from her core.

Callie bucked her hips slightly, seeking friction against Arizona's knee, desperate for more glorious contact against her quickly heating center. Sensing her need, Arizona shifted slightly, bearing more weight through the metal of her prosthetic knee joint as she intimately stroked Callie with her right knee and thigh as she assaulted her wife's lips and neck with kisses.

Pulling her lips from Callie's pulse point, Arizona studied her face, a smile gracing her lips as she caressed her face with her right hand. "I love you," she murmured when brown eyes opened, their warmth penetrating to the very depths of her soul.

Giving Callie no time to respond, Arizona leaned forward for a passionate kiss, anxious to feel her wife's mouth against her own once again. Callie's mouth parted as a moan escaped her, allowing Arizona's tongue to force itself into its moist recesses to begin an intimate dance with its counterpart. Continuing to stimulate her wife's center with her right thigh, Arizona shifted her weight again to grasp onto Callie's left breast with her right hand. Underestimating the amount of weight she was supporting with only her left hand and prosthetic limb, the knee joint of her prosthesis buckled, effectively sending her toppling onto her wife, her nose crashing violently into the side of Callie's head.

"Shit," she groaned as she quickly rolled onto her back, her fingers moving to either side of her nose as searing pain shot through her head, causing her eyes to water profusely.

"Oh my God, Arizona! Are you okay?" Callie practically shouted, her voice rising several octaves. Arizona jolted upright, still grasping her nose, tears now streaming down her face. "Move your hands," Callie insisted as she knelt beside her wife. "Let me see your nose."

"I'm fine, Calliope," she insisted as she jerked away from her wife's gentle touch. Abandoning her nose, she reached down to brusquely remove her prosthesis. "I hate the fucking thing," she yelled as she heaved it across the room, sending it crashing into the coffee table in front of the couch.

"Arizona!" Callie warned, startled by her wife's infuriated actions.

"I despise it, Callie," she continued as she moved further away from the Latina.

Callie reached out to gently touch the smooth skin of her wife's back, above where her bra still remained. "Arizona," she began. "You promised you weren't going to run. You promised me you'd talk things through with me."

"There's nothing to talk about," she retorted, her back stiffening at Callie's touch. "I'm nothing but a fucking failure, Callie. A failure who can't even pleasure her wife the way she wants to."

"Are you hearing any complaints from me?" Callie asked, the honesty and concern evident in her voice. Moving closer to where Arizona sat on the side of the bed, Callie stroked her back before unfastening her bra and pulling it off her body. Kneeling behind her, Callie reached around the blonde's body to grasp her breasts, turgid nipples pressing into the palms of her hands. "I'm so _hot_ for you right now," she husked into her ear.

"I have no idea how," Arizona huffed, all her insecurities once again overcoming her psyche like a tidal wave. "How can you honestly say that I _still _turn you on?"

"Look at me, right now, Arizona," Callie demanded. Slowly turning toward her, Arizona didn't resist when Callie pulled her to lie down next to her. Resting on their sides facing the other, Callie gently stroked the hair back from where it swooped over her right eye. "No more of this, okay?" she insisted. "I love you and you love me, and none of the rest of it matters," Callie stated firmly. "Do you remember when you told me that?"

A smile broke through Arizona's insecurities at the memory. "Do I really still turn you on?" she asked meekly.

"Arizona, of course you still turn me on," Callie replied honestly. "You're so, _so _beautiful and just the thought of being with you does things to my body that no one else has ever been able to do."

"Tell me," Arizona requested, confidence slowly returning to her voice.

"What do you mean? Tell you what?"

"Tell me what you feel. Tell me what I do to your body. Tell me how your body reacts when I touch you."

"You can't see that for yourself?"

"I want. . .no, I _need _to hear you say it. Tell me exactly what you're feeling," Arizona husked as her mouth tentatively flicked at her turgid right nipple. "Please, Callie. Do this for me. I need you to help me feel desirable again."

Settling more comfortably onto her back, Callie vowed to herself that she would do anything and everything Arizona needed her to do. "Oh. . .umm. . .I feel your tongue. . ."

"Go on," Arizona urged.

"It's so warm, and when you flick my nipple. . .oh God. . .just like that. . .and then you suck on it, I _always_ feel a surge that goes straight from my breast, directly to my. . .clit."

"That sounds like it feels nice," Arizona purred with growing assurance as she glanced up toward her wife, before latching on to the other breast.

"It's better than. . .nice. Oh. . .it feels amazing," Callie replied, growing more and more comfortable with this game Arizona needed her to play. Arching her back, she shoved her nipple further into Arizona's hot mouth. "And when you move from one breast to the other, which I _always _know you will -"

"Always? How do you always know?" Arizona asked curiously, before flattening her tongue and swiping it over a taut nipple.

"Because you're type A and very. . .oh God. . .thorough," Callie stammered, her body shivering as Arizona blew cool air over her aching nipple.

Callie grasped at the sheets as Arizona moved further down her body. "What happens when I do this?" she asked as she left a trail of hot kisses across her abdomen, before dipping her tongue into her navel.

"My heart rate increases, and I'm sure my blood pressure is through the roof," Callie admitted with a grin. "But more importantly, I can feel how unbelievably wet I am."

Arizona rested her chin on Callie's pubic bone, staring up into her lusty eyes. "I really do all of that to you? Even now?" she hesitantly asked.

"All of that," Callie replied honestly as she laced the fingers of her right hand with those of Arizona's left. "And _so_ much more."

Encouraged, and more than a little aroused by her wife's responses, Arizona moved further south, dipping her tongue to lightly graze against her now throbbing bundle of nerves. "So, what about this? What does this do to you?"

Callie dug her heals into the mattress, arching her back as Arizona drove her tongue deeper into her wetness. "Mmm, Arizona," she moaned, biting her bottom lip as she felt her wife press her legs further apart while her tongue continued to lap at her folds.

"What does that do to you, Calliope?" she asked again, desperate for a response.

"It makes me hot. So, _so _hot," Callie managed to get out. "Oh God! Right there, right there," she urged as Arizona relentlessly ran her tongue along glistening folds.

"Does that feel good, baby?" Arizona muttered against the flesh of her center.

"Yes! God, yes!" Callie answered breathlessly. "Jesús, Arizona! Me encanta cuando me jodas con la lengua!"

Arizona couldn't help the pleased grin that spread across her lips upon hearing her wife's scream. "Not fair, Calliope. As hot as that sounded, you know I don't speak Spanish," she chuckled softly. "What did you say?"

Soft moans and anxious short breaths were all that came from Callie's mouth as Arizona licked lightly from the bottom of her opening all the way up to the tip of her clit before forcing her tongue in and out of her slowly and deliberately.

"Answer me, Calliope," Arizona demanded.

"I. . .I said. . .Jesus, Arizona! I love it when you. . .fuck me with your tongue!" she stammered, her entire body shivering when Arizona switched the rhythm of her ministrations, her tongue now barely ghosting over her heated skin with the slightest of touches.

"You do?" the blonde asked.

"I do," Callie breathed out, as she gripped her wife's hand more firmly.

"But what if I do this?" Arizona questioned as she abruptly penetrated her wife's opening with two fingers.

"Arizona!" Callie ground out. "I. . I. . .all I can think about is how terrific you feel inside me and. . .and how much I. . ._really _need to come." Her mouth hung open, words dying on her lips, and moans were all that escaped her as Arizona continued licking and sucking her pulsing member as two fingers quickened their pace, driving deeper and harder again and again. Callie could barely breathe and was sure if Arizona didn't make her come soon, she was certainly going to die. "The muscles in my. . .God. . .pelvis and legs are sh-shaking. . ." she murmured, determined to continue Arizona's earlier request.

Arizona moaned against Callie's core and without warning bit at her sensitive clit, sending sparks of pleasure and pain surging throughout her entire body. Callie panted and squirmed in pure bliss, her eyes rolling back in her head when Arizona curled her fingers to stimulate that spot deep inside her. Glancing up her wife's writhing body from her position between her legs, Arizona noted the flush rapidly changing the color of her breasts, neck, and face, a tell-tale sign that she was undeniably about to come.

"So close," Callie murmured, her hips jerking and lifting uncontrollably. "Please, Arizona! Please-"

Hearing her wife beg, Arizona pushed deeper into her, toying with her engorged clit, circling it, lapping at it, then suckling it, before repeating the whole cycle over and over, again and again.

As Callie's climax began, she grabbed the hair at the back of Arizona's head with her free hand, forcing her face further into her aching center. With the added pressure, Callie's eyes slammed shut and her hips went crazy as an earth shattering orgasm crashed into her. "Oh, Fuck!" she cried out with a deep guttural growl when every muscle in her body began to spasm as she came hard, her body convulsing with pleasure, her juices flowing freely over Arizona's fingers and into her mouth.

As Arizona's mouth continued to work frantically over her throbbing core, Callie's breath caught in her lungs and her face reddened when she could no longer bear the continued direct stimulation of her clit. "Breathe," Arizona whispered with husky seductiveness before continuing the ministrations of her tongue, avoiding direct contact with her wife's now sensitive member.

"Oh. . .oh my God," Callie groaned in satisfaction as Arizona continued to lap at the excessively hot wetness that poured from her entrance, a second orgasm soon pulsing through her, setting her on fire.

Callie panted, desperately trying to fill her lungs with much needed air. Realizing that at that moment, her wife could take no more, Arizona remained between her legs, placing gentle kisses along the insides of her thighs before placing one final kiss against her erect clit.

Moving up her body, Arizona licked and nipped at her heated skin before settling on her side next to her wife. "Thank you. Thank you for doing that for me," she breathed against Callie's parted lips.

Callie's eyes remained shut and she swallowed hard, her breath still labored. "Oh my God, Arizona. Those were the most amazing orgasms ever."

Arizona chuckled at her wife's candor, but felt a sense if overwhelming pride surge through her. Rolling onto her side to face her wife, Callie finally opened her eyes to gaze into the darkened blue ones staring back at her. "I love you," she murmured against moist lips before running her tongue around them, savoring the spicy sweetness of her own essence lingering on her wife's mouth. Sucking on her bottom lip, she pulled back, releasing it with a loud pop.

Grinning wickedly, she nuzzled her face against Arizona's ear. "Haces cosas a mi cuerpo que nunca pense que fuesen posibles. Cuando me tocas, mi corazon palpita y mi rodillas se debilitan," she murmured before kissing down her wife's neck, sucking gently as she moved to her other ear. "Tu eres lo mejor que me ha pasado, y quiero ponerte tan caliente y mojada como tu lo haces. Te voy hacer sentir asombrosa."

Arizona shivered, the husky Spanish flowing from her wife's beautiful mouth igniting an inferno inside of her already aroused body. Throwing her head back as Callie latched onto her nipple, she could barely make words. "Translate, please," she requested.

Callie beamed, kissing the underside of a full breast. "You do things to my body. . .that I never thought possible," she murmured as she flicked her tongue against the other pebbled nipple. "When you touch me, my heart pounds and my knees go weak." Moving down the blonde's taut abdomen, she gently nipped a path to the apex of her thighs, dipping her tongue to briefly swipe at her hooded member before quickly veering off course to lick and kiss the crease between each of her thighs and the place Arizona needed her most. "You are the best thing that has ever happened to me. . ."

"Please, Callie. I need you," Arizona moaned, the urgency evident in her voice.

". . .and I want to make you as hot and wet as you make me," she continued, the throaty timbre of her voice muffled against the pale skin of her wife's thigh. "I'm going to make you feel amazing."

"Do it now. Make me feel amazing, now. Please, don't make me wait," Arizona rambled, her hands grasping at the sheets.

When Callie didn't immediately respect her wishes, Arizona hastily ran her fingers through thick brunette locks, roughly tugging at it to position her wife's mouth exactly where she needed it. Moving in closer, Callie pulled Arizona's legs to rest on her strong shoulders, her tongue immediately darting out to stroke an erect clit as her lips nipped and sucked at tender folds.

"Oh God, Callie. You drive me crazy," Arizona husked, her hands pressing her wife's face firmly against her drenched core. Bucking her hips against Callie's mouth and nose, Arizona could feel the beginnings of a mind blowing orgasm brewing deep in the pit of her stomach. "More, baby! Just like that."

Callie couldn't get enough. The urgency of Arizona's commands, the force with which she gripped her hair, and the desperation present in the writhing of her hips was enough to make her come all over again, but the fact that _she_ was the one causing such sheer pleasure for her wife, made her want to stay in this moment forever. "You are the sexiest thing I've ever seen," Callie moaned, her tongue thrusting in and out of Arizona's tight opening, her thumb rubbing furious circles over her throbbing clit.

"Baby don't stop! Oh my god, I love it when you do that!" Arizona's strangled cry echoed off the walls of their room.

Callie doubled her efforts, switching the attention of her lips to suck on Arizona's clit as she plunged two fingers into the slick recesses of her core. As Arizona writhed in ecstasy, Callie firmly held her hips as a burst of blinding white light flashed behind the blonde's eyelids.

Arizona cried out incoherently when her orgasm overtook her, sending waves of pleasure pulsating through her entire body. Her internal muscles milked Callie's fingers as her hands clawed at brunette hair. Whimpering and breathing hard, her legs held Callie tightly in place as the Latina continued to lick hard up and down the length of her slit.

"Oh. . .my God! Stop, please. . .I. . .I can't take anymore," she stammered pulling up on Callie's hair.

Callie chuckled softly as she scurried up the bed, laying a deeply passionate kiss on her parted lips. "Te quiero tanto," she replied as she pulled back from her wife's lips. "Gracias por estar. Gracias por venir a mí," Callie continued as she gently caressed Arizona's side. "Nunca seré capaz de tener suficiente de ti."

Arizona smiled as she brushed unruly hair from the perfect skin of her wife's face. "As incredibly hot as it is when you speak Spanish sweet nothings into my ear, you really are going to have to tell me what you're saying. . .preferably in English," she teased.

Callie grinned as she pulled the covers up over their bodies. "I _said_, I love you so much." She gently kissed her wife's lips. "Thank you for living. Thank you for coming back to me," Callie continued sincerely. "I'll never be able to get enough of you."

Arizona smiled, wrapping her right leg around Callie's hip. "Well, do you have any plans for the foreseeable future?"

"What do you mean?"

"You said you'd never be able to get enough of me, so I was wondering if you have any pressing appointments or anything," she shrugged.

"Well, I plan on marrying a hot blonde on Thursday evening, but until then, I don't think I have anything scheduled."

"Great!" Arizona cheered as she rolled on top of her wife. "Because I'm chaining you to this bed for the rest of your life."

* * *

**AN3: **There is some legal stuff in this chapter, and I did a lot of research trying to get it just right, but I do apologize if there are any inconsistencies or untruths concerning the actual adoption process or gay marriage in the state of Massachusetts. Also, I've studied Latin and German, but never Spanish, so I apologize if these translations are incorrect.

**AN4: **Thank you for continuing to read and review. I hope you liked this chapter. I truly enjoyed writing something a little less angsty and a lot more fluffy! As always your reviews and comments are most welcome. Thanks again!


	16. Chapter 16

**Title:** When It Don't Come Easy

**Author:** HandsThatHeal

**Beta:** Funkyshaz57

**Pairing:** Callie/Arizona

**Rating:** NC-17

**Summary:** After watching Arizona turn away from the people who love her most as she struggles both physically and emotionally to come to terms with the injuries she sustained in the plane crash, Callie decides to take matters into her own hands by embarking on a cross country adventure with Arizona and Sofia in hopes of reaffirming their love for each other and deciding if they have what it takes to carry on as a family.

**Disclaimer:** All television shows, books, movies, songs, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work and the characters, events, and settings thereof are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.

**AN: **No Arizona in 9x05 (total bummer), but trust me, there will be plenty of her in this update. No worries about that. LOL!

**AN2: **As always, a big thank you to my amazing beta!

* * *

**Chapter 16: **

"Arizona, look," Callie urged, pointing toward a small group gathered on Wequassett's Garden Terrace as they made their way to the car on their way to the courthouse. "Looks like someone else is getting married today," Callie mused as she pulled the blond closer to her, kissing her temple.

"Must be a good day to get married," Arizona teased as she wrapped her arm tightly around Callie's waist. Looking toward her watch, she smiled. "We still have some time before we have to meet with the Justice of the Peace. You want to go have a drink before we go?"

"Why?" Callie smirked, her eyebrows knitting together in confusion. "You think I need to be drunk to marry you again?" Callie asked as they continued to walk hand-in-hand.

"No," Arizona immediately retorted with a roll of her eyes. "It was just a suggestion. It's no big deal. I just thought it would be nice to sit down, have a glass of wine. . ."

"Arizona?" Callie halted, jolting the unsuspecting blonde to an immediate stop beside her. "Is. . .is that my dad?"

Arizona looked toward the terrace where Callie's eyes were locked. "Hmm," she began, studying the small crowd of people. "It does kind of look like him."

"Why is my dad here?" Callie asked, grabbing Arizona's hand and quickly pulling her along behind her.

"Slow down, Callie!" Arizona urged, stumbling slightly at the force and speed with which her wife was dragging her along.

"Oh, sorry," she replied; only minutely slowing their pace. "I should have known this was too good to be true. Why is everything in my life always a disaster? I really don't want today to be a disaster."

"Callie-" Arizona tried to interject.

"I mean, he knows we're here. Something terrible must have happened. Something must be wrong. Why else would he be here?" she rambled, her mind immediately jumping to sink holes, crazed gunmen, car accidents, plane crashes, family deaths, or worse.

"I don't know, Calliope," Arizona grinned. "Why else would he be here?" she repeated. "I can't think of any other reason at all."

As Callie took a closer look at the group gathered on the terrace, she realized that she knew not just one, but all the people standing there, minus one unfamiliar woman. "Arizona?" Callie whispered, her eyes wide. "What did you do?"

"What?" she shrugged, a dimpled grin gracing her face as she squeezed Callie's hands. "You think you're the only one who can be all romantic and surprise her wife?" Giving Callie no time to respond, she leaned forward to brush a soft kiss against her moist lips. Gently taking the sides of her face into her hands, caressing smooth caramel skin with her thumbs, Arizona stared into the soulful brown eyes she adored.

Callie's gaze faltered, darting from the terrace where their family stood to the bright blue eyes staring back at her. "Arizona. . ."

"I know we agreed that our first wedding was amazing, and I haven't changed my mind about that," Arizona began, watching as unexplained tears formed in her wife's eyes. "We said going to the Justice of the Peace would be fine, and it is. . .it really is. But. . .this place is so beautiful, Callie. I just couldn't imagine marrying you in a dark, dusty courthouse, when I could be marrying you here. . .so, instead of going to the Justice of the Peace, I brought her to us."

Callie's signature megawatt smile broke out onto her face when the reality of what was happening finally sank in. "Why are you crying?" Arizona asked, swiping at the lone tear that trailed down her wife's cheek.

"You're just so amazing," Callie replied, pulling her wife in for a tight hug. "I love you."

Tilting her head slightly, Arizona laid a brief kiss on her wife's jawline. "Come on," she insisted, grabbing Callie's hand. "Sofia has been here for the past hour and knowing that, and not being able to see her, has been driving me absolutely insane. Let's go see our girl."

* * *

"A marriage ceremony represents one of life's greatest commitments and is also a statement of love," the Justice of the Peace announced to the women standing before her and the small group gathered around them. "Arizona. . ."

Arizona cleared her throat, overwhelmed by the beauty of the woman standing in front of her. "Calliope, because of you, I laugh. . .I smile. . .I dare to dream again. Where there was cold, you brought warmth; where there was darkness, you brought light. I look forward with great joy to spending the rest of my life with you, caring for you, nurturing you, being there for you in all life has for us, and I vow to be true and faithful for as long as we both shall live. Today, I receive you as my partner and love, beside me and apart from me, in laughter and in tears, in sickness and in health, in conflict and serenity, asking that you be no other than yourself. Loving what I know of you and trusting what I do not."

"Callie. . ."

Callie squeezed the blonde's hands, the reality of how close she had come to losing this miraculous woman threatening to overcome her. Taking a deep breath, she began. "Arizona, from this day forward I promise that I will laugh with you in times of joy and comfort you in times of sorrow. Wherever you go, I will go; whatever you face, I will face. I pledge to you a life of giving and of hoping, of growing and of loving. You are my best friend, and I will love and respect you always. Today, I receive you as my partner and love, beside me and apart from me, in laughter and in tears, in sickness and in health, in conflict and serenity, asking that you be no other than yourself. Loving what I know of you and trusting what I do not."

"In all the ways that life my bring, you have vowed your love to each other, and are now ready to confirm that love in the responsibilities of marriage. If so, answer, We Are."

"We are," they both repeated.

"May I have your rings please," the Justice of the Peace asked. Taking the bands from Carlos, she continued. "Your rings by their very shape, are symbols of eternal unity without beginning or end. They are the emblem of the love that exists between you and characterize your devotion to one another. Let them always remind you of the commitments you make today. Please repeat after me."

"With this ring I promise to grow with you, to build our love. . ."

". . .to speak openly and honestly, to listen to you and. . ."

". . .to love and cherish you for all the days ahead."

"From this day forward, you shall not walk alone. . ."

". . .my heart will be your shelter and. . ."

". . .my arms will be your home."

"With this ring I thee wed."

"Arizona and Callie, as you have consented together in lawful wedlock and thereto have pledged your faith to each other, and have declared the same by joining hands and giving and receiving of rings and by the powers vested in me as a Justice of the Peace for the Commonwealth of Massachusetts, I now pronounce you are now married!"

Callie and Arizona couldn't stop the cheesy grins that covered their faces.

"If you wish to seal this marriage with a kiss, you may now do so."

Arizona smirked at her wife. "I don't know," she whispered teasingly. "Do you wish to seal this marriage with a kiss?"

Callie leaned closer, grasping the sides of Arizona's face with her hands. "I do."

* * *

"Thanks for coming, Daddy," Callie stated as she leaned over Carlos' shoulder where he sat in the private dining room Arizona had reserved for a small dinner reception following the wedding.

"I missed your first wedding to that wonderful woman, Calliope," he replied, nodding toward Arizona who sat laughing as she squeezed and kissed Sofia's cheeks. Callie and Carlos both smiled as he patted his daughter's hands that rested on his shoulders. "So, when I found out about this wedding, I felt that I had been given a second chance. I wouldn't have missed this for the world."

Callie smiled as she leaned in to kiss his cheek. "It must have been hard to leave Miami on such short notice, though," she noted, stepping around the large round table to take the seat next to her wife and daughter."

"It wasn't that short of notice, mija," he replied, as he took a sip from his wine glass. "Barbara called me the day before Thanksgiving to let me know," he continued.

The other conversations happening around the table came to a sudden halt, all eyes turning to the older woman, who at least had the wherewithal to look appropriately contrite.

"What?" she asked, shrugging innocently as her gaze darted from Arizona and Callie to Daniel and then back to Carlos.

"Was I the only one who didn't know about Callie's epic plan?" Arizona asked, a pout forming in her lips.

"Looks like it, sweetie," Callie chuckled, pulling her wife closer to her to place a kiss on her cheek, "but if it makes you feel any better, you got me good on this wedding ceremony today," she continued as she pulled Sofia from her wife's lap. "Seriously, I was totally surprised!"

Arizona grinned as she nuzzled Callie's ear with her nose. "You really liked it?" She asked when she pulled away.

"Definitely," Callie smiled before leaning forward to peck at pink lips. Glancing back toward the rest of their group, Callie turned her attention toward Barbara. "How did you get my dad's phone number, anyway?"

Barbara looked above the rim of her wine glass. "Google," she replied with a shrug, as if it were the most obvious answer in the world.

Arizona and Callie exchanged surprised glances as the occupants of the table chuckled out loud, all happy to be present for this special event.

After a wonderful gourmet meal of Atlantic Halibut, Butter Braised Lobster, Port Wine Poached Beef Tenderloin, Goat Cheese Soufflé, and Panzanella Salad, the group sat laughing and smiling as they talked about everything from Arizona and Callie's antics as children to the multiple places they had visited while on their cross-country tour.

When there was a brief lull in the conversation, Arizona gently tapped her knife against her glass. Once all eyes were on her, she cleared her throat and then sighed as a nervous smile graced her face. "When I was younger and first realized that I liked girls, my brother Tim asked me if that meant I was going to marry a chick," she chuckled softly, her eyes misting with tears. "When I said yes, he got this big smile. . .and said, _I'm going to dance so hard at your wedding_.". Looking down toward a trembling hand, Callie immediately grasped it, offering whatever support her wife needed. "Tim and I would talk for hours, picturing ourselves marrying beautiful women, getting houses. . .he wanted children, but I didn't. . .though, clearly I've gotten over that," she laughed, leaning over to place a kiss on Sofia's round cheek, whispering _I_ _love you, baby,_ into her tiny ear. "Unfortunately, Tim was taken from this earth way too soon, and as relationships and years came and went, I felt the dream he and I shared slip further and further away."

Arizona paused, glancing around the table. "That was until I met Callie," she smiled, shifting her gaze to look deeply into her wife's chocolate orbs. "When we started dating, I could see all those dreams. . .as well as dreams I didn't even know I had, finally coming true. With Calliope, all of my passions came back with more fire and drive than ever before."

"In a moment of insecurity, I proposed to her. . .and then drove us directly into the back of a truck. I'll admit," Arizona paused, shaking her head. "Not one of my better moments," she mused, holding tightly to Callie's hand who stared at her with all the love and support in the world.

"We've talked about this, Arizona. It was an accident. No one blames you," Callie softly interjected.

"I know," Arizona replied, her eyes locking with Callie's, her voice soft and full of emotion. "And, I'm not saying that I didn't mean it when I asked," she turned her attention to the rest of their dinner guests. "I was just so scared of losing her that I practically demanded she marry me. It was barely sweet and only borderline romantic. . .and definitely not the kind of proposal Tim and I had always talked about."

"You came back for me, sweetie. You gave up everything you had ever worked for to be with me. You were never going to lose me."

Arizona smiled, squeezing Callie's hand. "I'm trying to make a speech here," she teased, instantly lightening the mood. "Stop interrupting me," she scolded jokingly, leaning over to kiss her wife's cheek.

"I apologize," Callie replied sheepishly. "Carry on."

"In that instant, when I was sitting in the back of that ambulance with Callie, I saw all of my passions and dreams being torn from my grasp, but somehow, by the grace of God. . .and thanks to our friends at the hospital, Callie and Sofia both survived. Callie came back to me, Sofia grew and grew, we got married. . .for the first time and our life together was amazing. More than amazing, actually. It was awesome. . .spectacular."

Callie leaned over, brushing her lips against her wife's ear. "I'll always come back to you," she whispered.

Arizona closed her eyes, enjoying the feel of her wife's breath against her ear. "But then, as if we hadn't been through enough already. . ." her voice faltered, her emotions getting the better of her. ". . .an airplane I wasn't even supposed to be on, literally fell out of the sky. Sofia lost her daddy, Callie lost her best friend, and I. . .I was thrust into the darkest place I've ever been in my life," Arizona cleared her throat, steeling herself to continue. "Callie and I have been through so much and have had to endure unthinkable circumstances. We both have been forced to make the kind of life altering decisions that no one should ever have to make concerning the person they love most in this world," she paused, reaching over to pull Sofia into her lap from where she sat in a high chair.

"You know, people always seem to regret the way things turn out in their lives, but I can honestly say that I do not. I certainly miss my brother, and there will always be a void in our family that Mark used to fill. . .and of course I wish I still had _two_ legs. . .but in a way, Calliope and I have gained so much from the terrible tragedies that have plagued our life together. We have the most beautiful little girl, we have grown closer and more understanding of each other, and we have definitely learned not to take anything for granted."

"They say marriage is a partnership, but I actually think it's a little bit more than that. It certainly begins as a partnership, but with each passing day, it evolves and blossoms into something else. That something else, is a sense of unity, quite unlike anything I've ever felt before," Arizona turned her attention from the others at the table, focusing only on her wife. "Calliope, just over a year ago, I first pledged my love and commitment to you on our wedding day, and I'm delighted today, despite all the despair and darkness that has clouded our path, to reaffirm my commitment to you. I promise to love, honor, and comfort you forever. I love you more than anything, and I thank you for my life, for being my safe place, and for knowing me best, yet loving me most."

The group sat silently, allowing the sincere flood of words to sink in. At this moment, Callie was wholly unable to stop staring into the beautiful blue eyes she loved. By this point, she and Barbara were both in tears, Carlos and Daniel both sitting quietly reveling in the strength and determination of the women they had raised.

Clearing his throat, Daniel raised his glass. "To family, life, and love," he toasted.

"To family, life, and love."

* * *

Two hours later, Arizona sat cocooned in the warmth of a flannel blanket as she relaxed on a double chaise lounge on the deck of their suite, a roaring fire burning in the outdoor fireplace in front of her.

Looking up when Callie opened the deck door, Arizona smiled as she watched her wife juggle two steaming cups of hot cocoa and an extra blanket as well as a small wrapped box tucked protectively under her arm.

Taking the proffered mug into her hands, she scooted over slightly, allowing Callie to nestle as close to her as possible on the lounge. Handing her own mug to her wife, Callie spread the extra blanket over their bodies , tucking in the edges to stave off the cool breeze of the brisk November night. "You warm enough?' Callie asked.

"I am now," Arizona replied, sipping from her mug. "Mmm, dark chocolate?" she asked, savoring the hot liquid.

"Of course," Callie stated. "Your favorite."

"Mmm hmm." Arizona smiled, basking in the simplicity of the moment. After sitting in comfortable silence for a few moments, Arizona leaned her head to rest it on Callie's shoulder. "Should we have kept Sofia ourselves tonight? I missed her so much, but then we let my parents take her again for the night. Are we bad people? Are we bad mommies?"

"No," Callie chuckled. "It's our wedding night, Arizona. And besides, we'll see her in the morning. We'll make the trip back to your parents' house, and then the three of us will be together and on the road again."

Arizona smiled contentedly, placing a kiss on her wife's sweatshirt covered shoulder. "I think I'm ready," she stated, looking up at Callie.

"Ready for what?" Callie asked, confusion written on her face.

"To go home," Arizona answered. "I think I'm finally ready to go back to Seattle. Ready to go back to work, ready to be myself, ready to continue our life together."

"It's a pretty good life, isn't it?" Callie mused, before briefly capturing the blonde's lips.

"Indeed," Arizona replied simply when she pulled away.

After a few more quiet moments, Callie cleared her throat and then turned slightly to face her wife. "I have something for you," she stated as she took the mug from her wife's hand, setting both of them aside. "A little wedding present."

"Oh no. . .no more gifts, Calliope. The last time you gave me gifts, which was only a few days ago, I ended up with a wife, a baby, and a mortgage," she teased, a joyful gleam in her eyes. "I don't think I can handle the responsibility of anything else."

Callie chuckled, enjoying her wife's joking mood. "Why must you wound me so?" she retorted as she grabbed the box she had deposited next to the lounger. "This is something just for you - for no one's eyes but your own - unless of course you'd like to share it with others."

"Oooohhh, kinky!" the blonde cheered. "What is it? Sexy lingerie for me to rip off of you?" she questioned rapidly.

"Get your mind out of the gutter, Robbins, I'm trying to be sentimental and romantic here, and your dirty mind is stealing my thunder."

Sensing Callie's serious mood, Arizona's smile began to fade. "Oh, sorry," she quickly replied with a shrug.

Handing the box to her, Callie watched as she slowly tore off the paper. "Arizona, you are a wonderful, beautiful, amazing human being, and you have brought so much love and joy into my life. This is just a little something that I hope will remind you of my commitment to you, especially on the days when you aren't feeling so joyful, during the times when you're feeling less than wonderful, and for the nights when you question your beauty and doubt my love."

"Callie," Arizona began, as she gently ran her fingers over the ornate designs etched into the copper colored metal of the small square shaped box she now held in her hands. "What is this?" Callie sat silently, only motioning toward the item she held tightly in her grasp, urging her wife to raise the lid. Following Callie's silent request, Arizona pushed up on the lid, shocked by what she found within. "A stack of post-it notes?" she asked, her brow furrowing in confusion.

Callie took the fresh pad of sticky notes, shuffling through it toward the middle of the stack. "I choose you to be the one with whom, I spend my life," she read from the note in front of her. Shuffling though the stack once again, she stopped at a different post-it. "My hands will passionately love you and cherish you through the years, and with the slightest touch, will comfort you like no other," she read aloud before once again closing the stack of blue sticky notes. "Here," she insisted. "You try."

Arizona took the small pad of paper, mimicking her wife's actions as she shuffled through to a new page. "Whatever you can't do, I will. I'm here, and that's how this works," she read as she ran her fingertip over the familiar scrawl. Glancing up into deep brown eyes, she smiled before happily shuffling the pad again. "If you break down, I'll drive out and find you. If you forget my love, I'll try to remind you. I'll stay by you, when it don't come easy."

Callie once again took the stack of post-it notes when Arizona handed them back to her. "One more," she said, as she flipped her thumb across the bottom of the stack to shuffle through it. "People feel so much better after she helps them. Sometimes people feel better just after she walks into the room, because she has got this super magic smile and when she smiles at you, everything gets better."

Callie watched as a bright smile curled at the edges of her wife's lips. "Yep," she replied as she wrapped her arm around her wife's shoulders, drawing her closer to her under the multiple blankets they were bundled in. "That's _exactly _the smile I'm talking about."

Placing the post-it notes back in their keepsake container, Arizona set it aside. "Did you write something on every page of that note pad?"

"Uh huh," Callie replied. "I just thought that if you're having a bad day - if you doubt yourself or my love for you - then you could flip through and find a little inspiration. Some pages are a little more risqué than others, but most of them are just my thoughts and feelings. I know that sometimes I suck at telling you how I really feel, and instead of being honest, I pout and get cranky, and I'm sure I'm unbearable to be around, but lucky for me, you're still here."

"I am," Arizona admitted simply.

"It was time for a change. It was time for me to step up and show you how much you really mean to me," Callie replied honestly. "I'm just sorry it took all of this to make me realize it."

Arizona settled her body further into her wife's embrace. "We both need to be better. Things are different now, Callie, and we've been given a second. . ."

"Third. . ." Callie interrupted, anticipating her wife's next words.

"Actually, if you want to get technical, it's probably like our fourth chance," the blonde reflected. "But, that's not the point. The point is that neither of us is perfect, and we both could stand to be a little more open and honest with each other."

Callie nodded her head, a smile gracing her face. "I think I can do that," she said as she kissed her wife's temple. "Wanna shake on it?" she asked, extending her right hand.

"Oh, Calliope, please," Arizona scoffed, rolling on top of her wife and nuzzling her ear. "We're going to do so much _more_ than shake on it."

* * *

"Call us as soon as you stop," Barbara insisted as she hugged Callie goodbye.

"We will," Callie replied, holding tightly to the other woman. "Thank you for _everything_."

"No thanks necessary, sweetheart. I was just doing my job as a mother and a grandma."

Callie smiled as she pulled away. "Give Pop-pop a hug, Sofia," she urged, leaning forward with the toddler secured on her hip so that she could wrap her chubby little arms around his neck.

"Goodbye big girl," he replied, taking the miniature Latina from her mother's arms. "We'll Skype with you in a couple days."

"Bye, bye Pop-pop!" Sofia cheered. Bye, bye Grammy."

Callie once again took the energetic twenty month old into her arms. "Let's go, mija. We'll get you strapped into your car seat." Turning from her wife and in-laws, Callie waved one last time as she bounced away, chatting animatedly with Sofia before disappearing into the confines of the RV.

"You have a wonderful family, Arizona," Daniel said as his gaze moved from the RV to his daughter.

"They really are awesome, aren't they?" Arizona mused as she stepped forward to embrace her father. "They're my joy and reason for living."

"Indeed," Daniel replied simply when Arizona pulled away from him. "We're proud of you, Arizona," he continued when she turned from him to hug her mother.

"Youare _our_ joy and reason for living, too, you know," Barbara stated with a wink. "Drive safely, okay?" She continued, tears springing to her eyes.

"We will," Arizona replied as she stepped away from her parents.

"Don't forget to call," Daniel called as she turned to leave.

"We won't. I promise," Arizona replied, as she made her way up the stairs of the RV. Turning, she waved briefly before shutting the door behind her.

"You think they'll be okay?" Barbara asked as they walked back toward the house after the RV pulled away.

"No," he stated, shaking his head. Seeing his wife's shocked expression, he smiled slightly. "I _know_ they'll be okay."

Barbara smiled, relieved. "Oh really?" She teased. "How do you _know_?"

Daniel took her hand into his as they ascended the stairs to the front porch. "Because our daughter is a good man in a storm, Barbara. And she's who we raised her to be."

* * *

**AN3: **Thanks so much for continuing to read and review/comment. Have a great weekend!


	17. Chapter 17

**Title:** When It Don't Come Easy

**Author:** HandsThatHeal

**Beta:** Funkyshaz57

**Pairing:** Callie/Arizona

**Rating:** NC-17

**Summary:** After watching Arizona turn away from the people who love her most as she struggles both physically and emotionally to come to terms with the injuries she sustained in the plane crash, Callie decides to take matters into her own hands by embarking on a cross country adventure with Arizona and Sofia in hopes of reaffirming their love for each other and deciding if they have what it takes to carry on as a family.

**Disclaimer:** All television shows, books, movies, songs, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work and the characters, events, and settings thereof are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.

* * *

**AN: **Thank you so much for all of the wonderful reviews you left for the previous chapter(s)! I'm so glad you're still enjoying this story. For those of you who aren't enjoying it, I don't really care. LOL! If it's that terrible, just stop reading.

**AN2: **As always, a huge thank you to Funkyshaz57 for her guidance throughout each and every chapter.

* * *

**Chapter 17:**

"_I know a weenie man. He owns a weenie stand. He sells most anything from hot dogs on down. Oh baby. Someday I'll join his life. I'll be his weenie wife. Hot dog, I love that weenie man. I know a weenie man. He owns a. . ."_

"Arizona!" Callie called from her position in the driver's seat of the RV, music still playing throughout the vehicle as the blonde continued to dance with Sofia on her hip. "What the Hell are you singing?"

"Language, Calliope," Arizona scolded.

"Because that's_ so much_ worse than singing about loving a _weenie man_," Callie countered.

"Not my fault. You're the one who bought the CD for our young, impressionable, sweet little girl to listen to," Arizona retorted. "Remember that? When you were on that _secret_ shopping extravaganza with my mom," Arizona said, a smug smile curling at her lips.

"Your mother bought it," Callie stated defensively. "And besides, that CD has over a hundred songs on it, but for some reason, _you_ picked that one? What's wrong with classics like _Hickory Dickory Dock_. . .or. . .or _Mary had a Little Lamb_."

"Boring, Calliope," Arizona scoffed, chuckling softly. "How could I skip past a song called _Weenie Man_? _Someday I'll join his life. I'll be his weenie wife. . ._" she continued to sing.

Callie raised her eyebrow. "Do you have any idea how ridiculous that sounds coming from you?" she teased, a bright smile gracing her face.

Arizona glanced toward her out the corner of her eye. "Ok, fine," she stated simply, rolling her eyes. "New song, big girl," she finally conceded. Moving her attention from one brown eyed beauty to the other, Arizona looked confused when she realized Callie was pulling the RV over to the side of the road. "Why are we stopping?" she asked, concern written across her face. "You okay?"

Callie put the vehicle in park, but left the engine running. Once leaving Rhode Island, they had made a straight shot across the United States, stopping in several places like Pennsylvania, Indiana, Nebraska, and Wyoming. As promised, though, Callie made sure they completely circumnavigated the entire state of Idaho, adding an extra sixteen hours onto their already arduous trip.

Standing from her seat, Callie grasped her wife's hand and guided her to the couch in the main cabin of the vehicle. Pulling her down to sit next to her, Callie pulled Sofia from Arizona's grasp, settling the toddler onto her own lap.

"What's going on, Calliope?" Arizona questioned. "You're scaring me." Callie sighed, her thumb fidgeting with the wedding band on her wife's finger. "Oh God, you decided you want a divorce, didn't you? It's all too much, isn't it? You realized you can't handle a one-legged wife, and. . .and a baby, and a. . ."

"Arizona, stop!" Callie insisted, her voice rising to halt her wife's tirade. "And please don't _ever _call yourself that again," she continued, breathing deeply in an attempt to suppress the guilt she felt for previously using those exact same words. "It's nothing bad. Well, not really," she stated, her brown eyes reflected in the blue ones staring back at her. "I just wanted you to know that we're only twenty minutes from home."

Arizona's gaze immediately shot from the concerned look in her wife's eyes to the front windshield of the RV. "Oh," she stated simply. "I didn't realize we were that close."

"Yeah," Callie replied nervously. "I wanted you to know, just in case you've changed your mind," she continued with a sigh. "I want you to want this for you, sweetie. Not for me - not because it's what you think I want. I'm not going anywhere unless you're right there with me, okay. I'm here for you - no matter what."

Arizona smiled when Sofia wiggled herself from Callie's embrace, climbing onto the floor to play with the _Busy Ball Popper_ Grammy had also purchased for her. "I'm ready, Callie. I promise," she asserted. "It's time to go back. It's time for us to move on with our lives - with our life together. We're so much stronger than when we left."

Callie nodded her head in agreement. "It's amazing what eight weeks on the lam will do for a marriage," she stated, chuckling softly.

"_On the lam_?" Arizona asked, a smirk on her face. "You make it sound like we ran away."

"We kind of did," Callie stated with a shrug of her shoulders. "Well at least _I_ did. It definitely felt like I was fleeing, at least. After. . ._everything_. . .I just couldn't be in Seattle anymore."

Arizona leaned forward to place a soft kiss on her wife's cheek. "Maybe I should be asking if you've changed _your_ mind about going back," she offered as she pulled away. "Are _you_ ready to go home?"

"I am," Callie answered without hesitation. "I'm _so _ready."

"Awesome," Arizona replied with a dimpled grin. "You stay here with Sofia. I'll drive the rest of the way."

* * *

"Okay. I. . .I'm not ready," Callie stammered, as she nervously wrung her hands together. "I thought I was, but I. . .I'm not. Damn it!" she cursed as they walked through the hallway between apartments 501 and 502. "I should have gotten drunk or something."

"Callie," Arizona tried to sooth. "What's gotten into you?"

"Nothing!" she hastily replied. "I'm fine. I'll be fine."

Arizona searched her wife's face, watching as she unlocked the door to their apartment. "You go ahead and take Sofia in and get her ready for bed," Callie urged. "I'm going to go get as much of our stuff from the RV as I can."

Arizona didn't say a word as she watched Callie back away from the apartment door, allowing her the time she needed to work through whatever she was obviously having difficulty processing. She wouldn't let it go for long, though. Wasn't that one of their new rules? Hadn't they just agreed to be more open and honest with each other? "Okay," she finally whispered before stepping across the threshold into their freshly cleaned apartment.

Over an hour later, Callie made her final trip through their apartment door, hands full of Sofia's toys. "Arizona," she called as she deposited the load onto the floor before closing and locking the door behind her. "Where are you?" she asked as she made her way through the living room and into their bedroom. Stopping in the doorway, the site before her caused her breath to catch. Sitting against the headboard, Arizona hummed softly as she gently stroked the soft hair covering their daughter's head, as she lay sleeping across her momma's lap. "Hey," Callie called softly when Arizona didn't immediately notice her presence.

"Hey," she replied, looking up from Sofia's angelic face. "She was having a hard time getting to sleep, so I brought her in here with me," Arizona whispered as she continued to lovingly caress her dark hair. "I think she's down now, though."

Callie smiled as she stepped closer to the bed. "Come on sweet girl," she whispered as she lifted the sleeping toddler into her arms. After assuring that Sofia was indeed down for the count, Callie placed a kiss on her forehead before grabbing the baby monitor and exiting the bedroom.

Entering her own bedroom, Callie silently changed into her pajamas, while Arizona sat against the headboard, scrolling down through the listing of houses their new realtor had forwarded to them on the iPad Callie had surprised her with for her birthday. Slipping into bed beside her wife, the Latina stared up at the ceiling as she let out a big sigh.

"I talked to Owen," the blonde stated into the silence of the room. "I told him we'd be back to work on Monday. He was very happy to hear that."

"So, I still have a job?" Callie huffed sarcastically.

"Of course you still have a job," Arizona replied. "Why wouldn't you?"

"There were no guarantees when we left, but I told him I didn't care," Callie admitted, her eyes still locked on the ceiling. "Arizona, I. . ."

"I think we need to move," the blonde interrupted. "I don't think we should wait to get a house. I think we should do it now."

"Seriously?" Callie asked, the surprise evident in her voice as she rolled onto her side to face the blonde.

"Yes, Calliope," Arizona replied, looking up from the screen of her tablet. "I feel so lucky to be _here_ with my family, but this place is surrounded by too much negative energy, too much heartbreak, and too much sorrow. I used to love it here, but now it's just an apartment. It's not a home," she continued as she wound stray locks of brunette hair behind her wife's ear.

"Oh, thank God," Callie breathed out, relief washing over her face. "I'm not sure I can stay here for another minute."

"Well, I've never bought a house before, but it is my understanding that it'll probably take longer than a _minute_ to get everything taken care of," Arizona teased. "But you're right, we need a fresh start and as soon as possible. We need a place free of so many bad memories. A place where we can be a family and play games together and listen to music, follow our own evening routine and eat dinner together at our new dining room table. A place where we can make _new_ memories - good ones. A place where you, Sofia, and I can do all the things that make a house a home."

A bright smile illuminated Callie's face. "Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you," she repeated between pecks over her wife's face and neck as she sat up on her knees. Pressing her lips into Arizona's in a blistering kiss, Callie pressed her front into her wife as her hands grasped the sides of her face, forcefully pulling her closer. Finally tearing herself away for air, Callie pecked her lips briefly one last time. "This place gives me the heebie-jeebies. I don't think I can spend much longer living across from my dead best friend's apartment, let alone survive in _this_ apartment where you and I have spent way too much time accusing and crying. . ."

"Callie-"

"It's okay," Callie hastily interrupted, waving her off. "I was just so sure you'd want to wait. With all the other changes already going on - the wedding, going back to work, Sofia's adoption - I thought you'd want to wait on the house thing."

"Not a chance, Calliope," Arizona insisted, once again turning her attention to the screen of her iPad. "We have a few days before we go back to work, so I thought we could use that time to start looking. In fact, we have an appointment tomorrow at 10:00am with the realtor."

"We do?" Callie asked in surprise.

"Yep," Arizona admitted with a big smile. "Because I'm totally in love with _this_," she continued as she turned the tablet toward her wife.

Looking down at the screen, Callie's eyes went wide. "Wow!"

"You like it?"

"I love it!"

* * *

"Okay, big girl," Arizona cooed, as she took a seat beside Sofia at a table in the day care of SGMW. "I know it's going to be a long day, but mommy and I will come have lunch with you, okay?" Arizona offered as she watched Sofia fill a blank piece of paper with purple crayon scribblings. "Then you'll nap and play a little and before you know it, we'll be back to take you home. Momma will read you a bunch of books, and we can play with whatever toys you want while mommy makes dinner. Then I'll give you a bath, and we'll play in the bubbles, and. . ."

"You ready to go?" Callie asked when she approached her girls after arranging Sofia's belongings in her cubby. "Arizona?" she asked again upon receiving no response.

"I can't do this," the blonde finally admitted when she looked up toward her wife.

Taking in the worried look in her bright blue eyes, Callie knelt down in front of her. "Do you want me to call Owen?" she asked as she pulled her phone from her lab coat. "I'll text Karev. He can tell that ass Barnett that you won't be in today. I only have three elective surgeries scheduled, so I can. . ."

"No," Arizona stated with a shake of her head. "I'm ready to go back to work. I'm just not ready to leave Sofia. We've been together all day every day for the past eight weeks, and now I don't want to leave her. Can't she just hang out with me in Peds today?"

Callie smiled sympathetically. "I think you already know the answer to that, babe."

Arizona wrinkled her nose in mock disgust. "You're right," she replied with a sigh. "Just one more kiss, though."

"Okay," Callie teased, leaning in to capture her lips in a brief kiss.

"Not from you, you goof!" She laughed, swatting Callie's arm. "Bye bye, Sof," Arizona said as she placed a big smack on the toddler's cheek.

"Bye bye, momma!" Sofia cheered, her attention still locked on her crayon masterpiece.

"See! She's not even two and already she doesn't need me," Arizona huffed.

Callie chuckled as she too placed a kiss against a chubby tanned cheek. "Dramatic much?" She asked as she stood, grabbing Arizona's hand to pull her from her seat. "You sure you're ready for this?" she asked one last time.

"Umm, yeah," she replied hesitantly as she took one final glance at Sofia. "But, you better get me out of her fast, or I might decide that I hate being a surgeon and choose instead to be a stay-at-home mom."

* * *

"Dr. Robbins, you're back!" Alex Karev said with a smile as he entered her office through its open door.

"I thought you told me you hadn't completely destroyed my department," Arizona huffed, looking up from the mountain of paperwork on her desk. "I can't even get into the damn computer."

"You have to create a new password," he replied as he crossed the room, rounding her desk to look at the computer monitor.

"Yeah, I know," she groaned. "You have to do it in the settings menu, but I can't access the settings menu without a new password," she argued, slamming the keyboard harshly against the wooden desk.

"Here," Alex smirked. "Let me help."

Blowing out an exasperated breath, she stood, allowing the younger surgeon to take her seat. Sitting in the armchair across from him, she watched as his fingers moved across the keys. "So, Karev," she began. "Tell me about this new Peds guy."

"Total douche nozzle," came his unceremonious reply. "He tried to ship the orphan program over to UCLA, but I wouldn't let him. He said it didn't fit into his agenda or some crap."

"Thanks, Alex," she replied, an appreciative smile on her face.

"Yeah, well, I knew you wouldn't let that happen."

They sat in silence a moment longer, neither sure of what to say. "Umm, here you go. I broke into the settings menu for you. You should be good to go from there," he said as he stood from her desk chair. "You need help with anything else?"

Returning to her seat behind the desk, Arizona looked toward him, pondering his question. "No, I think I'll be stuck in here for a while," she replied, motioning toward the giant stacks of patient charts cluttering her usually immaculate desk. "If you haven't heard from me in a couple hours, though, send a search party because I may be buried under an avalanche of paperwork."

Alex moved through her office, but he turned around to face her before reaching the door. "Look, the only reason Hopkins wanted me is because you made me something, and I wanted to go because I thought I needed to prove that I was something without you there holding my hand," he admitted, as he watched her look up from her computer screen to acknowledge him. "Most of me thinks you're nuts, but you see something in me."

"You're a good doctor, Karev," she stated simply.

"I'm sorry this happened to you."

"I know."

"I'm sorry I was the one who cut off your leg."

"I'm not," Arizona stated, a slight smile curling at her lips. "You saved my life."

"You're not still pissed at me or whatever?" he asked, the obvious difference in his mentor from the last time he saw her becoming more and more obvious.

Arizona sighed. "No, I spent way too long being pissed and that almost cost me my family and my friends. It took me a long time, but I understand the decision Callie made, and since she couldn't be the one to do it, I wouldn't have wanted any other surgeon to be the one. You did a good job, Alex."

"So, we're okay," his words coming out as more of a statement than a question.

Arizona smiled as she stood from her seat. "We're more than okay. We're a team. A team who is going to run Mel Barnett out of this hospital, just like we did Robert Stark."

Alex smirked at her response. "You have a plan?"

"Not yet," she huffed. "But I'm working on it."

* * *

"Uh oh, Sof. Momma's shaking her head and has _that _look on her face," Callie said from the doorway of her wife's office. "Someone's in trouble, and I hope it's not one of us."

"Momma!" Sofia squealed as she wiggled in Callie's arms, desperately trying to reach Arizona.

A dimpled grin immediately replaced the scowl that was present on her wife's face when Callie arrived in her doorway. "Hey! What are you doing here?" Arizona exclaimed when she looked up from her computer screen, practically jumping from her seat to greet her family.

"Oh, I figured you'd get caught up in your work and forget about lunch, so we came to get you," Callie explained, a knowing grin on her face.

"Thank you," Arizona replied as she placed a gentle kiss on her wife's lips before taking the squirming toddler from her arms. "How was your first day back to school, big girl? Did you play with Zola?"

"ZoZo play ball," Sofia said happily.

"Yeah," Callie replied as she rested her hand on the small of the blonde's back, guiding her out her office door. "Apparently Zola hit Sofia in the head with a ball, so this one here decided to return the favor."

"Sofia Robbin!" Arizona scolded in mock exasperation as they walked down the hall and toward the elevator. "Did you hit your friend?"

"Play ball!" Sofia cheered.

"She doesn't seem too worried about it," Arizona replied, squeezing her daughter's cheeks with her hand and kissing her forehead. "I thought I might have to teach her how to hit hard and hit fast, so she only has to hit once."

"Arizona!" Callie chided. "She's not even two years old."

"It's never too early to teach self-defense, Calliope," Arizona stated as they stepped through the doors of the cafeteria.

Gathering their food onto a tray, Callie paid for their meal before following Arizona, with Sofia secured on her hip, toward an empty table. "How has your first day back been, Dr. Robbins?" Callie asked as she spooned a bite of applesauce into Sofia's mouth.

"It's been. . ._good_. So, _so_ busy," Arizona said as she picked up her cup to drink from the straw. "I talked to Karev-"

Callie nervously looked from Sofia toward her wife. "Everything okay?" she asked hesitantly.

"Yep," Arizona replied happily. "_Everything_ is great. Other than the mountain of paperwork on my desk, today has been _awesome_. I can't wait to get back into an OR."

"Well, well, well! The gypsies finally decided to return," Miranda Bailey teased as she approached their table. Arizona and Callie both smiled as the woman took an empty seat next to them. "I mean, you two sure do know how to cut it close, don't you. My wedding is in less than two weeks, and you two finally haul your butts back here. You haven't even RSVP'd. It's the least you fools could do since I married your asses."

"Oh, didn't you hear?" Callie countered, grinning at her wife. "That wedding doesn't count anymore. We got _legally_ married in Massachusetts."

"Girl, what did I tell you about those _legal _marriages?" Bailey reminisced.

"Oh, I'm not worried," Callie replied as she stared into blue eyes, the toe of her shoe caressing the inside of Arizona's leg. "This one's gonna work out."

"Hey, can I sit here?" Alex Karev asked as he breezed by with a mouth full of potato chips.

Arizona nodded, gesturing toward the empty seat. "I forgot how disgusting the food is here. I was gonna go for pizza. I don't know why I didn't pull the trigger."

"You want half of my sandwich?" Callie offered.

Hastily snatching the food from her grasp, Arizona frowned after taking a big bite. "That's not much better."

"Excuse me," another voice spoke from behind Arizona. "I'm Mel Barnett. I don't think we've met."

The table went immediately silent, Callie's big brown eyes wide as her gaze shifted between Arizona and the new Peds Attending, Bailey and Karev exchanging nervous glances as he continued to shovel chips into his already full mouth. Slowly turning around, Arizona stood from her seat. "Arizona Robbins, Peds Surgery," she greeted happily, extending her right hand to him.

"I thought that had to be you, Dr. Robbins. Good to meet you," he said with a smile. "May I join you?"

"Oh-oh, no," she said with a mock smile. "Because you have single handedly attempted to destroy _my_ department, and I find that when I look at you I want to hit you with my prosthesis."

"Excuse me?" he countered, shock written all over his face. "I came here to help when _you_ were too unable to fulfill your duties as the head of your department."

"Maybe," Arizona began, the smile still plastered on her face. "But the fact that you view me as someone who can be bowled over as you attempt to snatch my department right out from under me, well, that makes me mad - like violent. It makes me wanna punch someone. And, you know, I'm the daughter of a Marine, so I was taught to hit as a child. I was taught to hit fast and hit hard, so you only have to hit once. And now I feel like hitting a person. . .or a wall. No - definitely a person!"

"Have you lost your mind?" Dr. Barnett retorted. "Are you trying to destroy your career?"

"You mess with my kids again, I swear I will grab you by the beard and pull hard," she said, her smile fading as she stepped closer to him. "I grew up with the name Arizona; I learned how to play dirty on the playground."

Looking around her, Arizona noticed that not only were the eyes of her lunch mates locked on her, but the eyes of most of the other diners in the cafeteria as well. "Go," she urged, shooing him with her hand. "Run away before I take off my leg."

Scowling at the petite blonde woman in front of him, Dr. Barnett shook his head as he stepped back. "I hate this place," he muttered before walking away.

Quietly sitting back down at the table, Arizona didn't acknowledge the stunned faces of her wife and friends, but instead immediately took the spoon from Callie's hand to offer Sofia another bite of applesauce.

"Dude, you're bonkers," Alex finally mused with a shake of his head.

"Yeah," Arizona agreed, a slight chuckle escaping her lips. "But, I'm cute."

* * *

"You know, I was so busy today, I didn't even have a chance to ask you how _your_ day was," Arizona said as she handed Callie a glass of red, settling onto the couch beside her as she took a sip from her glass of white.

"Today was _okay_," Callie shrugged. "It was nice being back at work with you-"

"But?"

Callie nervously ran her index finger around the rim of her glass. "Sometimes it's still hard to be there," she admitted, exhaling a deep breath. "I mean, I know I never actually stopped working after the plane crash, and I've been in and out of the ORs a million times, but today, it just got to me a little. I had to see a patient in the ICU. . .in the same room where I watched Mark take his last breath," Callie shook her head, not meeting Arizona's concerned gaze. "Then I had three knee replacements. One of them was in the OR where I screwed up Derek's hand, and the other two were in the OR where. . ." Callie trailed off, but Arizona didn't need her to say more.

Sitting her glass on the coffee table in front of them, Arizona took Callie's from her, before doing the same. "Come here," she said as she pulled Callie into her embrace. "First of all, I know you miss Mark," she stated, her chin resting on her wife's shoulder. "We all do, babe. You don't have to try to hide that from me, and if you need to talk about him, then that's exactly what we'll do," Arizona gently insisted as she pulled back to meet her wife's solemn eyes. "And secondly, you did not _screw up _Derek Shepherd's hand. The surgery just didn't go as well as any of us hoped. He knew the risks, Calliope."

"I never should have been doing the surgery."

"He trusted you, Callie," Arizona countered. "And I'm sure he still does. There's some surgery out there to fix his hand. We just have to find it," she tried to reassure her.

"You're right," Callie conceded with a sigh and a brief nod of her head.

"Umm, yeah! Of course I'm right," Arizona stated confidently. After a brief pause, she reached up to brush the bangs off of her wife's forehead. "I don't think I ever told you this, but for an entire month after our car accident, I nearly had a panic attack every time I stepped into the OR where Sofia was born. All I could hear once I scrubbed in was the sound of two flat lines on the heart monitors. It took me awhile, but I finally was able to push the terrible visions of losing both of you aside by forcing myself to remember that both of you were alive - your hearts were - _are_ still beating."

Callie sighed, squeezing the corners of her eyes with the thumb and middle finger of her left hand. "You and I are way too accident prone," she said pointedly. "We probably should be bubble wrapped and placed in a padded room."

"We could be like the boy in the bubble," Arizona teased, hoping to lighten the mood.

Callie returned her wife's grin, trying to return to the carefree spirit they had shared for most of the day. "I'm sorry," she said sheepishly. "You had such a great day today. I'm being silly."

"You're not being silly," Arizona said with a smile. "The fact that you still _need _me after all of this, does a lot for a girl."

"Strokes your ego a little, huh?" Callie mused. Arizona only nodded, her bright dimpled smile warming the Latina's heart. "You know," Callie said seductively as she shifted closer to her before moving her left leg to straddle her lap. "There are some other parts of you I'd be willing to _stroke. . ."_

"Oh!"

"And look," Callie teased as she palmed both of Arizona's breasts through the royal blue V-neck she was wearing. "Here are two of my_ favorite_ parts."

Arizona bit her bottom lip when she felt her nipples harden against the fabric of her bra, throwing her head to the side to allow her now obviously wound up wife access to her neck.

"Oh, I like this part, too," Callie husked into the blonde's ear as her right hand blazed a path from her left breast, down her abdomen, landing between her legs to cup her mound through the yoga pants she was wearing.

Stroking her index, ring, and middle fingers firmly against the length of Arizona's sex, Callie smiled against her neck when she felt her wife's hip press firmly into her hand. "You're so fucking hot," Callie hissed against her neck. "I want to-"

"You have got to be kidding me!" Arizona groaned, her arms flailing in surprise when her cell phone began to ring.

"Let it ring," Callie murmured, moving her lips down her wife's neck to her throat. "They'll call back."

"What if it's important?"

"They'll call back."

Removing her hand from Arizona heated center, Callie moved to kneel between her legs, her mouth traveling from her neck to her chest. "Seeing you in your scrubs and lab coat again today - mmmm," she groaned, licking her own lips. "You made me so wet."

"For God's sake," Arizona shrieked, reaching behind Callie to grab her phone from the coffee table.

"Let it ring," Callie insisted again, her moistened lips moving back up to Arizona's jawline.

"He-hello," the blonde answered the phone slightly breathless.

"_Umm, Robbins? _

"Y-yes?"

"_It's Owen Hunt. Are you okay?"_

"I. . .I'm fine, Owen. What's up?"

Owen cleared his throat on the other end of the line. _"I just wanted to let you know that Dr. Barnett was just in my office."_

"Oh. Okay," Arizona replied sheepishly, her hips bucking unconsciously when Callie licked and mouthed her center through the thin fabric of her pants. "Umm. . .is there, Oh! Umm, is there a problem?"

"_Well, there's no problem as long as you're ready to return to full surgical duty tomorrow."_

"What?!" she shouted, immediately standing from her seat, throwing Callie back against the coffee table in the process. "Why?"

"_Dr. Barnett just turned in his resignation. He said Seattle Grace Mercy West doesn't fit into his agenda."_

"Oh," Arizona replied, a sly smile curling at her lips.

"What's happening?" Callie whispered, picking herself up off the floor to take a seat back on the couch. "Everything okay?"

Arizona waved her off. "I umm. . .yes. I'll be ready tomorrow."

"_Are you sure? I can call Karev and see if he can handle the bulk of the surgeries for a while."_

"No. . .I'm definitely ready."

"_Good. Well then, see me in my office first thing tomorrow morning. I need to discuss with you a few changes that were made while you were away."_

"Will do," Arizona replied happily. After a brief pause, she added, "Thank you, Owen."

"_No problem," _he replied._ "It's good to have you back, Arizona."_

A super magic smile lit up her face as she sat close to her wife. "It's good to be back."

* * *

**AN3: **The song at the beginning is called _Weenie Man. _It's a popular campfire song.

**AN4: **A much fluffier chapter than usual, but there's nothing wrong with a little fluff here and there. As always, your reviews/comments are greatly appreciated. Thanks again and have a great week!


	18. Chapter 18

**Title:** When It Don't Come Easy

**Author:** HandsThatHeal

**Beta:** Funkyshaz57

**Pairing:** Callie/Arizona

**Rating:** NC-17

**Summary:** After watching Arizona turn away from the people who love her most as she struggles both physically and emotionally to come to terms with the injuries she sustained in the plane crash, Callie decides to take matters into her own hands by embarking on a cross country adventure with Arizona and Sofia in hopes of reaffirming their love for each other and deciding if they have what it takes to carry on as a family.

**Disclaimer:** All television shows, books, movies, songs, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work and the characters, events, and settings thereof are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.

**AN: **A HUGE thank you to Funkyshaz57 for being the best Beta ever!

**AN2: **Thanks so much for continuing to read and for leaving such lovely comments and reviews. This story is drawing to a close, but I promise there are a couple more chapters yet to come. Enjoy!

* * *

**Chapter 18:**

"I'm just going to talk you through this, Dr. Yang," Arizona said from across the OR table where they stood preparing to perform a PDA ligation on the micro preemie in front of them. "It's really only about a ten minute surgery."

"Okay, let's begin," Cristina replied, grasping the surgical instruments in both of her hands.

"Okay, make a small transverse incision, just below the left scapula," Arizona began. "Now, go in under the third inner space of the ribs," she continued to instruct. "Be very careful to protect the lung."

"BP is 46 over 30," Cristina stated as she looked up toward the monitor.

"That's okay for a kid this small," Arizona replied confidently. "Now, sweep the lung to the side and use the retractors so you can visualize the duct."

"Wow, I've operated on a lot of hearts, but this - this is the tiniest one I've ever seen," Christina apprehensively admitted.

"It's okay," Arizona offered. "Just gently pull the aorta," the older surgeon continued. "Stay clear of the vagus nerve.

"The ductal tissue is so delicate. I'm not sure how you-" Before she could finish her statement, the monitor over Arizona's right shoulder began to alarm. "Damn it! The PDA ripped," Cristina urgently stated. "It looks like she's in cardiogenic shock."

"Suction," Arizona ordered.

"She's bleeding out," Cristina shouted.

"More suction! 60 Prolene," Arizona demanded, squinting her eyes as she looked into the tiny incision before her. "Come on, come on."

"Bradying down to 54!"

"Push Epi and Atropine!"

"What did I do?" Cristina nervously asked. "Did I-"

"No, no. It's fine. Just help me fix it," Arizona replied, shifting her weight uncomfortably. "Come on baby. Don't do this."

Cristina stared across the OR table, noting the concerned glower in the Pediatric Surgeon's eyes. Briefly flashing back to the four horrific days they spent in the mountainous wilderness, Cristina began to panic. "Melanie, page Dr. Karev!" she immediately ordered the circulating nurse.

Arizona's eyes instantly shot up upon hearing Cristina's command. "No!" she countered. "Melanie, do NOT page Dr. Karev. Dr. Yang, I need you to calm down. Just take a moment," she calmly encouraged.

"Melanie, please page Dr. Karev."

"Damn it, Cristina! Would you just listen to me?" Arizona persisted adamantly, looking up again to glare at the younger surgeon. "Start compressions!"

"But her heart hasn't stopped."

"With preemies we start CPR when the heart rate drops below 60. Now use two fingers and light pressure. Go!"

Cristina immediately followed the more senior surgeon's instructions, watching in awe as Arizona continued to suture through the tiny opening on the baby's left side.

"It's okay, Cristina. We've got this. We can fix this," Arizona calmly asserted.

"Still bradycardic, Dr. Robbins," Melanie informed.

"Just, wait," the blonde surgeon insisted. "There. . .got it!" she happily stated, letting out a breath as the monitors suddenly stopped blaring, the baby's vitals finally returning to normal. "Not gonna happen today, baby girl. Not on my watch," she softly spoke to the tiny child in front of her. "And the lung is up, and it looks _awesome_," she continued, pointedly looking at the amazed doctor standing across from her. "50 Vicryl."

"Arizona, I'm. . ." Cristina began, but was interrupted by a buzzing noise coming from the instrument tray behind her.

"Dr. Robbins, your phone is vibrating."

"Who is it, Melanie?" Arizona asked, her voice calm as she began suturing the extremely tiny human lying before her.

"It's Dr. Torres," the circulating nurse replied after looking toward the phone's display.

"Put her on speaker phone, please," Arizona requested. "Are you checking up on me again, Dr. Torres?" she asked once Melanie had turned on the phone, a smile obvious behind the blonde's surgical mask.

A soft chuckle came through the speaker before Callie's voice filled the operating room. _"Maybe," _she admitted honestly. _"But really I just wanted to ask if you want me to wait for you or go ahead and take Sofia home."_

"This is my last surgery, and we're almost finished," she replied, her hands confidently continuing to suture the incision in the child's side. "Go ahead without me. I have a few notes to dictate, and then I'll be home."

_"You sure?" _Callie asked, slight concern evident in her voice. _"We can wait if you're almost ready."_

"I'm sure," Arizona insisted. "I'll see you soon, Dr. Torres," she continued sarcastically.

_"Okay,"_ the Latina conceded. "_Love you."_

A slight blush rose to Arizona's cheeks. "Me, too," she replied with a gleam in her eye.

Once the line was disconnected, Cristina spoke. "Dr. Robbins, I apologize-"

"Mmm hmm," Arizona hummed, tilting her head to one side, her eyes twinkling brightly from the grin hidden behind her mask. "Don't let the fake leg fool you. I'm nothing but hardcore," she teased.

Cristina returned her smile from beneath her own surgical mask. "Welcome back, Dr. Robbins," she stated softly.

"The same to you, Dr. Yang."

* * *

Two hours later, Arizona tiredly made her way toward the door of the apartment she shared with her wife and daughter. Pushing her key into the lock, she could hear the sound and feel the pulse of music coming from within.

"Callie?" she called as she pushed open the door. Entering the main room of the apartment, she realized that the music was coming from their bedroom. As the blonde removed her jacket, she deposited her keys on the stand behind the couch before throwing her jacket and bag over the back of it. Approaching the bedroom, she could hear her wife's voice and the squeals of their daughter over the beat of the music.

"_Hey sista, go sista, soul sista, flow sista! Hey sista, go sista, soul sista, go sista! He met Marmalade down in Old Moulin Rouge. Strutting' her stuff on the street. She said, hello, hey Joe! You wanna give it a go?"_

The sight before her caused Arizona to gasp softly, shaking her head as a soft giggle escaped her lips.

_"Giuchi giuchi ya ya da da," _Callie sang into a hairbrush. "_Giuchi giuchi ya ya here. Mocha chocolata, ya ya. Creole Lady Marmalade," _she continued, as she sexily moved her boy short clad hips to the beat, a tight t-shirt hugging her upper body, over-sized sunglasses covering her face.

But it was more than the vision of her scantily clad wife dancing and singing in their bedroom that made her heart soar, and Arizona couldn't help the laughter that filled her soul at the sight of the miniature Latina also dancing before her. Sofia held her own hair brush to her mouth as she babbled terribly off key, her bottom only covered by a diaper, pajama top covering her torso, Minnie Mouse sunglasses obscuring her chocolate brown eyes.

"_Voulez-vous coucher avec moi ce soir? Voulez-vous coucher avec moi?" _Callie went on, continuing to dance while holding Sofia's hand as the toddler bounced up and down on the bed. _"He sat in her boudoir, while she freshened up. Boy drank all that Magnolia wine. On her black satin sheets, where he started to freak. Giuchi giuchi ya ya da da. Giuchi giuchi ya ya here. Mocha chocolata, ya ya. . ."_

"The songs you choose to expose children to never cease to amaze me," Arizona shouted, her voice barely audible over the pulse of the music.

Callie immediately froze, slowly turning toward the doorway - the megawatt smile that illuminated her face potentially lighting the entire Western Seaboard. "Funny coming from you, _Ms. Weenie Wife_!" she countered with a smirk before hooking her fingers, beckoning her wife to come hither.

Arizona tilted her head to the side, a sexy gleam in her eyes. Stepping forward, she allowed the Latina to grasp her right hip with her left hand, as her other hand still supported the exuberant child on the bed.

"Mommy silly!" Sofia cheered, jumping up and down as Lil' Kim rapped in the background.

"You're right, big girl. Mommy _is _silly," Arizona agreed as she leaned over to tickle the smiling toddler. Standing back up to face her wife, she pressed her hips more firmly into hers as she pushed the sunglasses up from her eyes to rest on the top of her head. "And incredibly _hot_," she whispered into Callie's ear before nipping lightly at her ear lobe.

Callie removed the sunglasses from her head, and placed them over her wife's eyes. "Join us," she grinned before pecking her wife's lips. "It's our last dance before bedtime."

Arizona nodded in agreement, but sat down on the edge of the bed instead of beginning to dance with them.

"What are you doing? You can't sit down and. . . ." What Callie saw happening caused her to pause and threatened to bring tears to her eyes.

"Okay, let's do it," Arizona replied as she stood from her seat after removing her own shoes and pants, Callie's large sunglasses still covering her blue eyes. "Last dance, Sofia. Let's make it count."

"Sing too, momma!" Sofia cheered, jumping up and down until she landed in a giggling heap in the middle of the bed.

A sexy gleam filled Arizona's eyes as she looked toward her wife. Grasping her black boy short clad hips, she kneaded the flesh of her bottom with her fingers before lightly stroking the exposed skin between the top of her underwear and the hem of her shirt. _"Touch of her skin feeling silky smooth, color of cafe au lait. Alright! Made the savage beast inside roar until she cried. More-more-more!"_

"You're miraculous," Callie said softly, interrupting her wife's singing. "Gorgeous. . .amazing. . .and I can't believe you. Are. Mine," she mused, accentuating each of her last words with a peck along her jawline.

Arizona turned her head to consume her wife's full lips with her own. Once she removed herself from her wife's inviting mouth, she pulled the sunglasses from the bridge of her nose to rest on top of her head as she smiled. "I saved six tiny human lives today. My first day back to a _full_ surgical schedule since the crash, and each and every surgery was a success," she stated softly.

"I'm not surprised," Callie replied honestly as she pulled Arizona closer to her. "You're excellent. _My wife_ is a super star with a scalpel."

Arizona couldn't help the appreciative smile that consumed her face, her eyes twinkling delightfully.

"Sing more, mommy!" Sofia demanded, interrupting their moment. Both women laughed as Arizona turned to grab both of Sofia's hands, swaying with her from side to side as Callie continued to sing.

"_Voulez vous coucher avec moi ce soir. Voulez vous coucher avec moi. Voulez vous coucher avec moi ce soir. Voulez vous coucher avec moi, C'Mon! uh!" _

Arizona turned her attention back toward Callie as the song moved closer to its end. "Once Sofia's in bed," she began with a wicked gleam in her eye. "I _certainly_ want to sleep with you, _ce soir_!"

* * *

"What are you doing?" Arizona asked anxiously as she buzzed between their bedroom and the bar in the kitchen.

"Umm. . .eating breakfast and doing a Sudoku," Callie mumbled through a mouthful of Cheerios.

"Well, hurry," Arizona demanded as she nervously wound the freshly washed hair at the left side of her face around her ear. "Is. . .is that what you're wearing?" she asked with a scowl as she inspected her wife.

Callie raised her eyebrow as she dropped the spoon into the bowl with a clang before looking down her pajama clad body. "I'm still in my pajamas, Arizona. Of course this isn't what I'm wearing."

"Get dressed, then! Take a shower, fix your hair. . .or. . .or whatever," she insisted with a flourish of her hand. "You have to hurry, or we'll be late. I can't even deal with you right now."

Callie's eyes widened, a shocked look on her face as she turned in her seat to face the anxious woman still moving about the kitchen. "Hey, hey, hey, hey," she interrupted as she grabbed Arizona's wrist, forcing the pacing blonde to stop in front of her. "You need to chill out."

Arizona huffed, rolling her eyes and shaking her head incredulously.

"Look, I know that you're worried, but as far as adoptions go, this one seems pretty cut and dry. It's gonna be fine."

"What if they think I'm some kind of thrill seeker who jumps out of airplanes or an obsessive bungee jumper? Someone who dangles from the Jaws of Life. . .or. . .or what if they hate me because I like girls?"

Callie pulled her closer to her until the blonde's legs were positioned between her own. "You're not a skydiver," she began, a pointed look on her face. "And if you are, you should probably stop now because you _clearly_ suck at it," she teased in an attempt to lighten her wife's anxious mood.

Arizona rolled her eyes, turning her head to avert her gaze. "This is important to me, Calliope," she whispered.

Grasping her chin, Callie immediately forced her to face her. "I know," she replied softly. "It's important to me, too. But, this is just the finalization hearing, and it isn't for another three hours, Arizona. We've already been through the home visit and that went great. Sofia is yours, sweetie. They aren't going to say no."

"But what if-"

Callie shook her head. "They're going to say yes," she insisted with a smile as she pulled her wife into her arms. "By the end of today, you're going to have a piece of paper that says what we already knew - that Sofia is yours."

* * *

"What is it that you do for a living?" the judge asked from the bench in the courtroom.

"I am the Chief of Pediatric Surgery at Seattle Grace Mercy West Hospital," Arizona answered confidently from her seat between Callie and their lawyer, Sofia sitting on Miranda Bailey's lap behind them in the courtroom gallery. Alex Karev, Richard Webber, Meredith Grey, Derek Shepherd, and Zola Grey Shepherd were also present for not only support, but to provide statements on Arizona's behalf if the need were to arise.

"You've been a part of this child's life since April of 2011?"

"Yes, your honor. Since her birth," Arizona stated.

"Since that time, have you done everything you can to provide for this little girl, Sofia Robbin Sloan Torres?"

Callie squeezed her wife's thigh in support. "Yes sir, I have."

"Are you aware that if the court enters the final decree today, then Sofia becomes your legal responsibility as if she were naturally born to you."

"Yes, I am aware of that."

"Are you prepared to stay the course until she reaches the momentous age of eighteen?"

"_At least_ until then," Arizona replied with a smile.

"Do you believe that this adoption is in Sofia's best interest?"

Arizona looked toward Callie who took her hand into hers before nodding her agreement. "I do."

"Very well," he nodded as he pulled his glasses down the bridge of his nose. "I would like the court to note that according to the petition for second parent adoption filed by Dr. Robbins on December 1, 2012, Sofia's sole legal parent is Dr. Calliope Torres and that Dr. Torres is such due to the death of this child's other legal parent, Dr. Mark Sloan, on September 27, 2012," the Judge elaborated. "Is the information provided here in this petition accurate to the best of your knowledge, Dr. Robbins?"

Arizona swallowed the lump that had formed in her throat and squeezed Callie's hand. "Yes, your honor. The information provided to you is accurate."

"Okay, then," he continued, as he shuffled the papers before him. "Does anyone have any questions?"

Arizona looked around the small courtroom, noting no evidence of questions from any of its occupants. "No your honor, I don't believe we have any questions."

"Thank you Dr. Robbins," the Judge nodded with a genuine smile. Clearing his throat, he continued. "Well then, the court finds it has jurisdiction over the subject matter in the party's hearing. The court finds that Sofia Robbin Sloan Torres was born on April 1, 2011 and has been in Dr. Arizona Robbins' custody since that date. The court finds that the sole legal parent, Dr. Calliope Torres, having the authority to consent to the legal adoption does in fact consent. The petitioner is obviously of good moral character, has the ability to support and educate the child, and raise her in a more than suitable home. The appropriate background checks have been completed, and there are no impediments to the adoption." The Judge paused as Sofia and Zola began to giggle from where they sat in the gallery. Laughing himself, he said, "The mental and physical condition of the child appear to make her a proper subject for adoption by the petitioner, and without any question, the best interest of the child would be served by the issuance of the Final Degree of Adoption, today."

Arizona looked toward Callie and smiled, allowing the gravity of this moment sink in. "No turning back now," Callie whispered into her ear. "You ready?"

"You know it," Arizona replied softly, a dimpled smile on her face.

"Okay, are we ready for the magic words?" the Judge teased. Arizona nodded happily as Callie took her hand between both of hers.

"It is therefore ordered, adjudged, and decreed that the Final Decree of Adoption is hereby granted, and it is my honor to sign the order right now," he announced happily.

Arizona let out a huge sigh of relief as Callie clapped cheerfully before pulling her into a tight embrace, as their friends in the gallery applauded as well. "I told you they wouldn't tell you no," Callie said when they pulled out of the embrace.

"Oh, don't be smug," Arizona smirked, pecking her wife's lips as she stood from her seat, moving toward Bailey to pull Sofia into her arms. "Come here, big girl," she cooed as she kissed the side of the toddler's face, hugging her tightly to her.

While Arizona talked happily with their friends and colleagues, receiving congratulatory remarks and well wishes, Callie spoke with the lawyer and judge, gathering all of their legal documentation. After shaking the Judge's hand and thanking him for his ruling, her cell phone in her jacket pocket began to vibrate. Pulling the device from her pocket, she quickly answered it when she saw the number on the display.

"Hello?" she answered as she motioned to Arizona that she was stepping out of the courtroom for some privacy. Arizona regarded her questioningly, but went about bundling Sofia into her coat and hat as Bailey and Karev helped her gather their belongings.

Exiting the courtroom with her friends, Arizona scanned the hallway, but saw no sign of Callie and instantly became worried that something was wrong. Saying her goodbyes to the rest of their friends, Arizona exited the courthouse with Sofia secured on her right hip as Bailey and Karev carried their bags.

"Where did that wife of yours go?" Miranda asked as they descended the steps of the courthouse, both women scanning the area for any sign of the Latina.

"You want me to go check the courthouse again?" Alex asked, as he looked around him.

"Hey!" Callie called as she quickly bounded down the stairs, a huge smile on her face as tried to catch up to them. "Sorry, I needed to take that phone call."

"Everything okay?" Arizona asked, a confused look written across her face.

"Thanks for your help, guys," Callie said as she took the bags from their friends, completely bypassing Arizona's question.

"No problem," Miranda replied as they walked toward the parking lot. "I'm glad everything worked out," she said as she hugged both of them. "I'll see you at work tomorrow," she continued as she unlocked her car door and slid inside.

"I gotta get back to the hospital," Alex said as he stepped toward his own car. "Chunky Stew has a follow-up in about an hour."

Arizona and Callie both waved goodbye as they continued the short distance to their SUV. "What's going on, Calliope?" Arizona asked again, her patience wearing thin.

After safely securing Sofia in her car seat, Callie quickly shut the door before grabbing Arizona by the lapels of her coat and pulling her in for a searing kiss. "Mmmm," Arizona moaned into her wife's hot mouth. "What was that for?" she asked once Callie allowed her to pull away.

"That was the realtor on the phone," the Latina answered with a huge smile on her face. "The sellers accepted our offer on the house."

* * *

**AN3: **As always, your comments and reviews are most welcome! Have a great week!


	19. Chapter 19

**Title:** When It Don't Come Easy

**Author:** HandsThatHeal

**Beta:** Funkyshaz57

**Pairing:** Callie/Arizona

**Rating:** NC-17

**Summary:** After watching Arizona turn away from the people who love her most as she struggles both physically and emotionally to come to terms with the injuries she sustained in the plane crash, Callie decides to take matters into her own hands by embarking on a cross country adventure with Arizona and Sofia in hopes of reaffirming their love for each other and deciding if they have what it takes to carry on as a family.

**Disclaimer:** All television shows, books, movies, songs, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work and the characters, events, and settings thereof are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.

* * *

**AN: **A huge thank you to everyone for consistently reading and commenting/reviewing. This story has definitely gone further than I ever thought it would, and I am thrilled that it has been received so well. Thanks again!

**AN2: **An extra special thank you to Funkyshaz57 for being the best Beta and motivator ever!

**AN3: **Happy Thanksgiving to those of you who celebrate it and to those who don't, here's a little something to hopefully help you make it through the lack of Grey's Anatomy tonight. ENJOY!

* * *

**Chapter 19:**

The scooting of furniture across the freshly polished hardwood floors combined with the clatter of dishes and muffled curses in both English and Spanish caught Arizona's attention as she stepped from the bottom of the stairs into the spacious Great Room of their new home. "Callie?" she called as she entered the kitchen through the dining area.

"Damn it! Esto es una locura. ¿Por qué los armarios tan alto? La madre que te parió!" she mumbled as she stood dangerously on a chair reaching precariously into the top cabinet in their state-of-the-art kitchen.

"Callie!" Arizona spoke, trying to catch the belligerent Latina's attention.

"Puta madre! No me gusta la cocina!"

"Calliope!"

"Hijo de puta! No puedo encontrar la maldita cosa estoy buscando! Qué Cabrón!"

"Calliope Iphegenia Torres!"

"What!?" Callie spat, swinging herself around on the chair so quickly that she lost her balance, her arms flailing as she tried to catch herself before ultimately tumbling awkwardly to the floor. "Joder!"

"Oh shit!" Arizona cried in shock as she hurried across the room to where her wife lay in a heap on the floor. "Are you okay?" she asked worriedly.

"Do I look okay to you?" Callie shot back, wincing as she grasped her left elbow.

"Don't move!" Arizona insisted. "You may have broken something."

"Don't you think I'd be a better judge of that?" she huffed, trying to get up from where she lay sprawled out on the floor.

"At least let me see your arm," Arizona insisted. "Maybe we should get an x-ray."

"You - talking to me - about x-rays and broken bones is rather condescending, you know," Callie muttered with a roll of her eyes.

"Well, Calliope, you are a _delight_ this evening. Is there something that you'd like to talk about?" Arizona asked a knowing smile on her face. She was sure that this grumpy demeanor was due to some sort of internal struggle on her wife's part and not any fault of her own.

"Umm. . ." Callie seemed to ponder the question as she stood from the floor, but immediately began to climb onto the chair once again. Reaching high onto the shelf, she instantly began to curse again. "Oh my God! I hate this freakin' kitchen!"

"You _love_ this kitchen," Arizona stated matter-of-factly, as she held the chair her wife was standing on. "In fact, it's one of the reasons we decided on this house."

"Well. . .then, who unpacked in here? Was it you? No! It was probably Karev, or. . .or Cristina, because clearly whoever did this has no idea where things are supposed to go. I swear, Sofia could have done a better job."

"_You _unpacked the kitchen, Calliope," Arizona stated sweetly as she bit her bottom lip in an attempt to stifle the giggle that threatened to spill forth from her mouth.

Finally reaching the serving trays she was searching for, she lowered them to the countertop before gingerly stepping from the chair. "Well, then maybe we should hire a contractor to lower the cabinets. . .because I'm like ten feet tall, and I can't reach a damn thing in here," she huffed before picking up the chair and repositioning it back under the dining room table.

"Callie. . ."

"We already have what's-his-name coming to add that bench in the master bathroom. . .he can do this, too."

Arizona stepped up behind Callie who stood with her back to her, the Latina's hands supporting her own weight on the countertop. "Callie," the blonde soothed as she gently rubbed her back. "What's going on?"

Callie let out a deep breath as she dropped her head forward, her shoulders slumping dejectedly. Slowing turning around, she took in the concerned look on her wife's face. "I. . .I'm sorry," she began. "I just want everything go well tomorrow."

"It's going to be fine," Arizona tried to assure her.

"I don't want it to be_ fine_, Arizona. I want it to be _perfect_," Callie replied. "This house - it's our new beginning - for you, Sofia, and me. It's like _out with the old and in with the new_, and when our friends get here tomorrow evening for the housewarming or dinner party, or whatever we're calling it, I want them to be impressed."

"This house is _huge_, Calliope. There's no way they _aren't _going to be impressed," Arizona stated, still confused by her wife's morose demeanor. "Most of our friends have already been here anyway. They helped us move in."

Callie sighed as she moved from Arizona, crossing the room to sit at the dining room table. "It's not the house. . .it's just everything. I'm out of my element here, Arizona."

"Callie, I've seen pictures of the house you grew up in," Arizona mused.

"I know, I know. That's not what I mean. It's just. . .I break bones for a living. I used to live in the basement of the hospital. When I was a resident, I'd wear last night's eyeliner to work the following day. I didn't give a crap what other people thought. . ."

"That's not true, Calliope."

"Okay, so I _pretended_ I didn't give a crap what other people thought," Callie said, suddenly shy in her wife's presence. "I didn't have many friends. Bailey didn't think I was good enough to be chief resident, and she was right. Addison left. Erica left. George died. But then you came along - perfect, sweet, amazing - you."

"Callie-"

"Then people started to view me differently. I was no longer the girl who lived in the basement or married the intern in Vegas. I grew up - but I _still _kept screwing up. We lived in the off-campus apartment where the burnouts go to buy pot. I was the girl who got knocked up by her best friend and almost died because she didn't wear her freakin' seat belt."

"All of this over a dinner party with our friends?"

Callie shook her head. "I'm just nervous. I want everyone to see that I'm not that girl anymore. I want them to see me. . ." Callie trailed off, choosing her words. "I want them to see me the way_ you_ see me."

"Incredibly hot? Super sexy?" Arizona immediately asked with a sly grin on her face. "Because I'm really not okay with our friends picturing you naked, Calliope."

Callie laughed despite her insecurities. "You're _so _bad," she mused.

Arizona chuckled as she gently sat on Callie's lap. "We all have a past. Some things we're proud of and other things, not so much," she offered, tilting her head to the side, blue eyes locking with brown. "But that stuff doesn't matter anymore, because your past doesn't dictate who you are. It's just a part of who you have and will become. I love you, babe. Everyone loves you, and everyone is going to love this house."

"There's just so much to do. I don't want to screw it up," Callie replied as she wrapped her arms tightly around Arizona's waist.

"We're both off work tomorrow. You've been cleaning for weeks. We've done all the grocery shopping already, and we have enough liquor, wine, and beer to inebriate a herd of wild elephants," Arizona said with a dimpled grin.

"We're going to need it with Cristina and Meredith here," Callie replied with a smirk.

Arizona smiled as she kissed her cheek. "I'll keep Sofia occupied while you're cooking tomorrow, and Bailey said she, Ben, and little Tuck could come early to help with anything we need. It's going to be fi - it's going to be _perfect_."

"You think so?"

"I know so, because Arizona Robbins didn't marry _no_ slouch," she teased as she wrapped her arms around Callie's shoulders. "This party is going to be amazing because you're amazing."

* * *

"Arizona, are you okay?" Miranda Bailey called through the closed bedroom door after receiving a text message from the blonde moments prior. "People are starting to arrive. Callie's wondering where you are," she gently said as she turned the doorknob and peaked her head in through the door. Pausing before entering the room completely, she assessed the blonde sitting on the edge of the bed clad in a navy blue silk robe.

"I. . .I'm sorry. I didn't know who else to go to," Arizona replied after a moment's hesitation. "I'm afraid to go out there, and I thought you might be able to help. Somehow you were able to convince Callie to marry me the first time around, and I know that you tricked me into coming to the hospital for that Lemierre's kid, so I was hoping that you could say something that will make me want to get off my butt and go out there."

"Oh, Arizona," Miranda sighed, crossing the room to sit next to her on the edge of the bed, a confused look on her face. "What's-"

"I. . .I only have one leg, Bailey," Arizona stated matter-of-factly in an attempt to explain her hesitation for joining the party. "It took me so long to even be able to look at myself. . .and for the longest time, I hated when Callie looked at me. I. . .I wanted to surprise her. I thought that maybe tonight would be the night, but. . ." Arizona trailed off as she stood from her seat, grasping the belt of her robe in her hands as she began to untie it. "I'm not naked under here, so don't look so worried," she joked nervously. "I'm not going to flash you."

"Well, I. . .I didn't think. . ." Miranda paused as Arizona pulled the robe from her body, taken back by the confidence that the woman in front of her was exuding.

Interpreting her silence as discomfort and disgust, Arizona began to ramble, a blush rising to her cheeks. "It was a stupid idea. I. . .I look ridiculous."

"No!" Miranda immediately responded, quickly stepping toward the blonde to impede her hand that was attempting to remove the dress. "You and your wife may be used to naked ladies running around, but I'm _not_. You just caught me off guard - and not because of your leg."

Arizona searched the shorter woman's face, notably struggling with this decision.

"You look wonderful," Miranda said honestly. "You are a beautiful woman, Arizona Robbins. You could have two legs or no legs and you'd still be beautiful. You are fierce, girl. You have more courage and guts and. . ._swagger_ than any other white person I know."

A bark of laughter erupted from within Arizona as she tried mightily to fight back her tears. "Thank you, Bailey," she replied gratefully as she looked herself up and down in the mirror. "I do have swagger, don't I?"

Miranda laughed as she reached for Arizona's hand. "Indeed you do, girl. Now, come on," she insisted. "You're about to miss your own party, and I want to be the first person to see the look on Callie's face when she sees you."

* * *

"Of course we have Tequila," Callie said with a laugh as she stood in the great room talking with Cristina Yang and Meredith Grey. "I knew the two of you were coming."

"Hey, that's not fair, Cal," Cristina scoffed. "We're not the same girls who used to screw boys like whores on Tequila."

"Yes, we're much more. . .refined these days," Meredith said with a grin as she sipped from her glass of wine.

"Mer's right," Christina replied as she quickly threw back a shot of Tequila. "Sometimes we drink _wine_. Lots of it."

Callie smiled as she mingled with the group of people dispersed throughout the first floor of their home, though her attention was continuously drawn toward the staircase her wife had disappeared up a half hour prior. Glancing to where Sofia and Zola were contentedly playing with baby dolls on the couch in the family room, she then moved toward the kitchen to refill her glass of Merlot.

Before she made it to the kitchen, however, she paused when she _felt_ Arizona's presence over her left shoulder.

"You look lovely tonight, Arizona," Derek Shepherd said as he moved toward her, completely blocking her from Callie's view. "We love the house."

"We do to," Callie heard Arizona respond happily.

Stepping closer to the small group that had now gathered around Arizona, Callie's breath hitched when her wife's body finally came into full view. "Wow!" she gasped breathily, her own chocolate eyes scanning the length of the blonde's body before locking with the cerulean orbs she adored.

"I. . .I didn't feel confident enough yet to wear heals. So, I wore flats," Arizona stated nervously when she stepped directly in front of Callie, the rest of their guests once again mingling amongst themselves.

"You look. . .wow. . .Arizona. You are. . .stunning," Callie stammered, the mixture of pride, love, lust, and joy stealing all coherent thought, making it difficult for her to find her voice.

"I wanted to surprise you," Arizona stated simply as she nervously tugged at the short skirt of her dress. "Surprise!"

"Oh God, baby. I'm not going to be able to take my eyes off of you," Callie admitted without shame, her eyes once again ogling the blonde's entire body. "You have no idea how _proud_ I am of you right now and how _honored_ I am to be your wife. I'm so in love with you, Arizona."

"Sweet talker," Arizona teased, a single tear sliding down her cheek.

"No tears, babe. Not tonight," Callie replied as she brushed the dampness from Arizona's face with a gentle swipe of her thumb. "Tonight - this house - is our new beginning, remember? We're finished with the tears."

Arizona nodded as she placed her hands on Callie's hips, pulling her body flush against her own. "I really want to kiss you right now," Arizona whispered into her ear.

Smiling sexily, Callie ran her tongue along the shell of Arizona's ear. Blowing cool air over the now damp cartilage, she then kissed the sensitive skin along her jawline. "_I_ really want to rip of your clothes and make you scream my name _right now_," she husked into her ear. "But I guess I'll settle for a kiss."

* * *

"Hey, Dr. Robbins," Tuck said as he climbed onto the sofa and scooted close to her as she sat speaking animatedly with April Kepner, Jackson Avery, and Owen Hunt.

Arizona turned her attention and looked down at the child, smiling happily as she wrapped an arm around him. "Hey, Tuck. Are you having fun?"

"It's okay, I guess," he said honestly, taking a sip from the juice box in his hand. "Dr. Robbins?" he inquired after a moment.

"Yes, Tuck?" Arizona responded cheerfully.

"Why does your leg look like that?" He asked inquisitively as only a child could. "Did your real leg break off?"

Arizona paused, her smile faltering momentarily. "Umm. . .well-"

"William George Bailey Jones!" Miranda scolded as she stepped closer to her son. "Boy, that's enough. You know better than that. Apologize to Dr. Robbins right now!"

The room immediately went silent upon hearing her raised voice, all eyes turning toward a surprised blonde, furious Miranda Bailey, and clearly confused little boy.

Arizona cleared her throat, swallowing a lump that began to form. "I. . .it's. . .it's okay," she stammered as she quickly glanced around the room, taking a deep breath before letting it out slowly. Tilting her head to the side, she pursed her lips, pondering the best way to answer his candid question. "Tuck, do you know how when you're sick, sometimes your mommy brings you to see me or Dr. Karev, and we give you medicine to make you feel better?"

Tuck nodded his understanding, his attention fully on the woman sitting beside him. "Well, I hurt my leg really, _really_ badly a few months ago, and it made me very sick. I took medicine, just like you do when you're sick, but the medicine didn't make me feel better."

"Will my leg fall off the next time I get sick?"

Arizona smiled. "No. . .it won't," she stated simply, turning her attention from him when she felt a hand on her shoulder. Glancing upward, she noted the concerned look in her wife's eyes, smiling as she reached up to squeeze the hand resting on her shoulder. "Your mommy and daddy, and Ben love you _so_ much that when you're sick they'll do anything to make you feel better, right?"

"Yeah," he replied. "Sometimes daddy makes chicken noodle soup for me, and mommy always holds me and sings to me. Ben likes to play with dinosaurs. T-Rex always beats Megalosaurus."

"That's awesome," Arizona replied with a genuine smile, scanning the room to find all eyes on her. "You know Dr. Torres, right?" she asked the little boy as Callie took the seat on the couch on the opposite side of him.

"Geez, Dr. Robbins. Of course I know her. She's right here," he replied in disbelief, leaning his body into Callie. "She's Sofia's other mommy."

"That's exactly right," Arizona said, chuckling softly as she locked eyes with the woman in question. "Well, Dr. Torres loves _me_, just like your mommy and daddy and Ben love _you_. When I was sick, she did everything she could to make me feel better, just like your family does for you. My old leg was hurt, and it was making me sick, so the only thing Dr. Torres could do to make me feel better was get rid of the hurt leg so that I could get a new one."

They sat in silence for a moment, Tuck clearly pondering the story he was just told. "Does that make sense? Do you understand?" Arizona asked.

"Yeah, I think so," he replied, content with his new knowledge as he hopped down from the sofa to join Sofia and Zola on the floor where they sat playing with _Mega Blocks._

"I'm so sorry," Miranda whispered, once he was out of earshot.

"It's fine," Arizona countered, waving her off. "He's just curious. That's a good thing."

Miranda rolled her eyes and leaned against the arm of the couch as Arizona grabbed Callie's hand and settled into the warmth of her body. As Miranda, Arizona, and Callie watched the children play, they heard Tuck excitedly speak. "Sofia," he said as he helped her connect two of the blocks. "Your mom's leg is_ so cool_!"

* * *

Two hours later, after they had enjoyed a lovely meal, excellent conversation, and for some, quite a bit of alcohol, Arizona continued to chat with their friends while Callie leaned against the bar in the kitchen sipping her wine.

"We're leaving soon," Miranda said, startling Callie as she approached her. "Little Tuck turns into a bear when he doesn't get enough sleep. Can we help you with anything before we head out?"

"I don't think so. We'll be fine."

"Callie, are you okay? You've been. . .quiet this evening," Miranda asked, the concern written across her face.

"I'm good," she immediately replied. "Better than good, actually. I'm awesome or outstanding. . .or any of the other adjectives my wife loves to use," she joked. "I'm just trying to take this all in."

"You finally found your something," Miranda reminisced. "Your wife and your daughter are what make you bounce up and down."

"Yeah, they really are," Callie admitted with a grin. "I think we're really going to be happy here. It was _so_ time for a change."

"Change is good," Miranda agreed. "Amazing things can happen to a person when they decide to grab life by the reins and take control of it, instead of just sitting back and watching it happen. Life doesn't stop for anyone, Callie. We all have to change and adjust."

Callie smiled, fondly looking toward her friend. "Thank you, Bailey. You've always been so supportive of Arizona and me."

Miranda rolled her eyes, waving Callie off with a sigh. "Stop doing that thing. You know I don't do personal business."

"Uh-huh," Callie mused before taking a sip of her wine.

Miranda laughed, patting Callie on the arm. "I'm just glad the little bird decided to spread her wings and fly."

Callie chuckled, remembering the first night she saw Arizona enter the hospital after so many months of pain and suffering – just a couple weeks before they had embarked on their cross-country adventure of recovery, healing, and reconnection not only with each other, but as a family. "I should get back to the. . ." Callie paused, her words interrupted by the sound of her wife's adorable laughter.

Seeking out the voice that never failed to lighten even her darkest moods, Callie couldn't help the enormous grin that spread across her face. Watching from across the room, her heart nearly stilled when she saw Arizona standing with a wine glass in her hand, her head thrown back as she laughed animatedly with Cristina while Karev stood smirking beside them. Taking in the glimmer of her bright blue eyes, the confidence in her posture, and the comfort of her every movement, Callie was sure that this was the most relaxed - and happy - she had seen Arizona in months.

So many times over the last nine months, Callie wondered if they would ever reach this place again. She worried that she and Arizona would never be able to simply enjoy themselves as they previously had, but most of all, as she lay awake at night, she feared that she would never hear the infectious sound of her wife's laughter or witness her radiate the sheer confidence and quiet strength that she did at this very moment.

But - here they stood - in their new home, surrounded by their friends, both feeling happier than they had in a very long time. Callie had prayed so many times to God or anyone who would listen that someday this moment would come, but for so long, she was sure that her prayers had gone unnoticed.

As she continued to watch her wife, Callie recalled the first time - in the aftermath of the crash and its eventual fallout - that she had prayed for Arizona.

_She remembered her pager blaring in her ear as she lay sleeping soundly on their bed still clad in the black and purple lingerie she had purchased to surprise Arizona with a totally hot I missed you thing upon her return from Boise. Quickly grabbing the offensive device she groggily read the 911 flashing across its display as she scrambled from the bed to get dressed. Gathering herself and Sofia, she dashed across the street and into the elevator toward the conference room where Owen Hunt had summoned her. Entering the room, her heart sank when she saw the look on his face. She instantly knew something was gravely wrong as she took in the forlorn dispositions of not only the Chief of Surgery, but of Miranda Bailey, Richard Webber, Jackson Avery, and Alex Karev. _

_The words Owen spoke to her were unfathomable and all she could remember was Bailey taking Sofia from her trembling arms as she fought the urge to either __punch Hunt, scream and cry, or puke on Alex's shoes. But once it all sank in, once she was able to focus, Arizona was her only concern and so, she began to pray. It wasn't until Avery mentioned something about Mark that he even entered her tormented mind._

_For four days, she waited. She cried. She cursed. She prayed. She couldn't sleep. She couldn't eat. She couldn't work. It took all of her energy to be the parent Sofia needed her to be - essentially the only parent the little girl had left._

_Late on the second day, Miranda had convinced her to make the call to Arizona's parents, and so with a trembling hand, she dialed the phone number. Tears began to flow down her face before they even picked up the phone. How could she be the one to tell these lovely people that their daughter, a Pediatric Surgeon, who should be safe in a hospital saving the lives of children - the only child they had left – was missing somewhere in the middle of the mountains near Boise, Idaho? How could anyone do that? But, somehow she found the courage to soldier through and had assured them that their daughter would be coming home. Arizona just had to make it back to them. The alternative was simply unfathomable._

_She barely remembered the third day. Richard had been forced to inject her with 2 milligrams of Ativan to sedate her following a particularly violent outburst when she overheard several hospital employees discussing the survival rate of a plane crash and how there was no way that her wife, her best friend, and their fellow surgeons could still be alive. Her outright frenzy had morphed into a full-fledged anxiety attack, where she was wholly unable to catch her breath, her heart rate through the roof. _

_She jolted awake on the fourth day on a cot in the conference room with Sofia nestled close to her body and little memory of the previous day. Miranda sat in front of her, gently stroking her arm as Alex burst through the conference room door shouting that they had been found. The relief she felt was short-lived, however and was brusquely ripped from her grasp when Owen ambled into the room with a more accurate report. _

_One female - dead. _

_Two males in critical condition._

_One female in serious condition._

_One male and two females in fair condition._

_There were countless possibilities of who fit into which category. It was like trying to solve one of her beloved Sudoku puzzles - who fit into which neat and tidy little box. No matter how she considered it, no matter how much she prayed that Arizona was either in serious or fair condition, she was unable to stop thinking of the one dead female. _

_But then, she heard her voice. Two hours later, Owen received a phone call from a flustered Chief of Emergency Medicine at Boise Memorial stating that one of the survivors was demanding to speak with __her__ wife. After four days of living in her own personal Hell, Callie ripped the phone from Owen's hand and heard that voice that never failed to lighten even her darkest moods. The voice was strained and at times barely above a whisper, but it was her. It was her Arizona, and she was alive._

_Callie insisted that she would see her very soon because she and Sofia would be on the flight from Seattle to Boise along with Owen Hunt, Richard Webber, Miranda Bailey, and Zola Grey Shepherd. The sob that erupted from deep within her wife when Callie told her they would be there soon was like nothing she had ever heard before. Arizona's petrified sobs and frightened pleas had rocked Callie to her very core as she begged her not to get on that plane. Callie wanted to argue, she wanted to defy her wishes. How could she expect her not to come to Boise after worrying for four long days about her whereabouts and her safety while fearing the worst? Callie's enduring commitment and endless love for her wife won out, however. She swore at that very moment that she would never do another thing to cause Arizona further pain or heartache. So she stayed. She made Miranda and Owen promise that they would bring Arizona back to her safe and sound. _

_She stayed. She cried. She cursed. She prayed. She couldn't sleep. She couldn't eat. She couldn't work. She called Daniel and Barbara to let them know that Arizona was indeed alive, but that she had suffered a terribly complex femur fracture. She busied herself with Sofia while she paced the room set aside for her wife as she waited for the Life Flight Helicopters to transport the survivors from the airport to the roof of the hospital. _

_When she saw Arizona for the first time, her heart nearly stopped as bile rose in her throat. The once vibrant blonde was now pale with cuts along the left side of her beautiful face, her once bright blue eyes dark and sullen. _

_Callie wanted to cry, she wanted to sob until her eyes ran dry, but she couldn't. She wouldn't. It was her turn to be the strong one.__ She needed to be Arizona's rock because she needed her now like she never had before. Instead of succumbing to her own emotions, Callie gathered the broken woman into her arms and rocked her soothingly as Arizona clung to her like a life raft in a tumultuous ocean of fear and despair. _

_It didn't take long to realize that this wasn't the same Arizona she had kissed goodbye prior to watching her leave with five of their fellow surgeons, but that didn't matter. She was still her wife, and she would be there for her. Even if this person was just a shell of the wife she once knew because all the Arizona had been scooped out, she would be there for her - with her, because she was going to fight like hell to get her Arizona back. _

_In a flurry of surgeries and rounds upon rounds of IV antibiotics, Arizona physically and emotionally improved until that fateful day when Callie had been forced to choose. Forced to choose between life and death. Callie knew she would never be able to purge the events of that day from her mind, nor did she feel she should be afforded that luxury. As she sat helplessly in the OR after sending Alex Karev to do the unthinkable, Callie knew that this moment would change her life forever. Her life would never be the same, and as she meticulously united the epineurium of the median nerve in Derek's hand with two lateral sutures of 8-0 nylon, she felt the earth - her world - shift on its axis._

_After scrubbing out the surgery, Callie rushed into the next OR, closing her eyes and shaking her head when she heard the unmistakable sound of a saw hitting bone. She had heard that sound thousands of time over the length of her surgical career, but it would never again just be the sound of a bone saw moving through periosteum, then through compact bone and spongy bone until it reached bone marrow. _

_It was no longer that simple. _

_It would forever be the sound of broken promises, misguided guarantees, and the failure to protect the one person she loved most in this fucked up world. Clenching her fists, she repeatedly slammed them into her forehead as her tears began to fall. What the Hell had she or Arizona done to deserve this? _

_Once the surgery was complete and Arizona's infected limb had been removed, Callie walked alongside her gurney as they first pushed her into the recovery room before ultimately settling her back into the hospital room where she had spent over two months. As Callie sat nervously watching her wife's face for any movement or sign that she was waking up, she had absolutely no idea what she was going to say when Arizona did indeed wake up. As if reading her mind, Arizona's face began to twitch, her brow furrowing, and her eyes blinking rapidly as she fought to awaken from her chemically induced sleep. _

_The smile that broke out on Arizona's face upon seeing her sitting at her bedside nearly killed her. Callie was sure that the last thing Arizona remembered was kissing her goodbye before she went off to perform miracles, and she wished with everything that she was that she could freeze that moment - take a snapshot of that smile - to save for all eternity. Because as Callie spoke, as she explained the events that lead to that very moment, Arizona's once cheerful face fell further and further into depression - further and further into anger, resentment, fear, and sadness._

_And that was how they spent much of the following months. Callie was angry at the world for putting her into such a position, she resented the plane crash, the pilot, the charter company, or anyone else she could think of for taking the life of her best friend and for leaving her with a shell of a wife. She was afraid she was losing everything and saddened by the fact that Sofia had to endure this Hell right along with them._

_Arizona's actions were volatile, her mindset was unwavering, and it often scared Callie how quickly the blonde's psyche could change from one moment to the next. This left her in a constant state of uncertainty, leading her to always proceed with caution and never get her hopes up when signs of the "old" Arizona emerged._

_But, like a gift from God, Bailey had listened to Callie go on about Arizona not wanting to leave the house and had miraculously tricked her into walking across the street to the hospital. After all the fighting and all the hate, Callie saw a glimpse of her wife - a glimpse of the real Arizona Robbins. She was no longer the uncompromising woman with bleak lifeless eyes staring daggers into her soul. She was no longer the woman so debilitated by depression that she could not physically remove herself from their bed - her words no longer dripping with accusation and condemnation._

_It had taken time, but Callie knew that Arizona had eventually been able to partially come to terms with the fact that ultimately her leg had to be amputated. It had to be amputated in order to save her life. With Callie's continued support and tough love – though it was incessantly unwelcomed – the rational thoughts of the doctor inside her had been able to overcome the unreasonable judgments made at the scathing loss of her limb. Through this, she had reconciled with the fact that, while Callie was ultimately responsible for the amputation, she was not to blame._

_Upon the acceptance of this revelation, there had been a clear shift in her behavior as well as in their relationship. While still resentful, Arizona had slowly begun to heal. She forced herself to see light at the end of the darkness. _

_The week after Bailey had coerced her into the hospital, Arizona insisted upon returning to work on light duty. Two weeks after that, she personally placed her name back on the surgical schedule._

_Even though her wife seemed to have progressed by leaps and bounds, Callie knew she was still struggling both physically and emotionally, which led her to the decision to take her family away from it all. _

_That trip. Their adventure across the United States had proved to be more healing than Callie could have ever hoped for - not just for her wife, but for herself and their family as well. It was where they learned to trust again. Where they learned to back each other up without limits, to allow themselves to grow without borders, and to love without end._

_Callie had experienced every emotion possible over the eight week period of their trip. From elation and sheer pleasure when Arizona had trusted her enough to make love to her again to complete self-loathing and despair at times when she was sure that she had failed again and that this entire trip had been a mistake. The end result, however, was more than she could have ever imagined as she sat in the conference room of SGMW discussing RVs with Derek Shepherd. _

_Never in her wildest dreams did she think that her harebrained idea would lead to this moment. The moment when she would be standing in her new home watching her new wife laugh heartily as some of the most important people in their lives filled their home with so much love and joy._

_Callie knew that she would forever wish that that terrible day never happened. If she could go back in time and somehow erase that day from the course of their history, she would do it in an instant. If she could, she would transport herself back to the pit where she watched in surprise as her wife called Alex Karev a miserable, miserable bastard and an ungrateful crap dog. If she could, she would try her damndest to make the stubborn woman change her mind. She would insist she remember her fear of flying and force her to stay instead of fleeing. _

_That day was worse than any other they had experienced. Worse than Africa, more terrifying than a crazed gunman, and more scarring than traumatic brain injuries and ventricular septal defects. The scars from this would linger for the rest of their lives, but Callie knew that she would forever be grateful to God or whoever she had prayed to that she was afforded the opportunity to see her wife again and for the second chance she was granted. After all the tears, heartache, anger, and despair, Callie knew without a doubt that they were now stronger together than they had ever been - and that would be their constant - the one thing that would never change. _

Taking another sip of her wine, Callie was pulled completely from her reverie when the sound of her wife's laughter once again penetrated her mind. Glancing in her direction, Arizona winked at her when she caught her eye. Callie smiled, slightly flushed from the alcohol she had consumed and from her constant state of arousal caused by the sheer sensuality that seemed to radiate from her wife for the entire evening. Locking eyes with the blonde, Callie blew her a kiss from across the room before picking up her wine glass and exiting the kitchen to join her _something. _Her whole world.

* * *

Before the front door of their house was completely closed behind their last guest, Callie had Arizona pinned against it, her moist lips blazing a trail down her neck, her right thigh pressed firmly against the blonde's center. "You're mine tonight," she husked into her ear as she grasped her hips pulling her more firmly against her.

Callie nipped at her jawline, and Arizona couldn't help the laughter that escaped her lips when her nose tickled the sensitive skin of her neck. "Ca-Callie! Stop!" she shrieked through a fit of giggles. "That tickles."

Callie chuckled along with her before quickly capturing pink lips in a heated kiss, effectively changing the blonde's laughter into soft moans of pleasure. Callie's tongue darted into Arizona's mouth and the blonde massaged it with her own in a battle of wills before her teeth grazed along her plump bottom lip, pulling it into her mouth.

"I've wanted to do this all night," Callie murmured as she broke the kiss, nipping her way down the sensitive skin of her wife's clavicle. "You're so damn sexy in this dress," Callie stated as her lust filled eyes wantonly studied every inch of her.

"I thought you might like it," Arizona replied as she wrapped her arms tightly around the Latina as she forcefully pushed her backward through the foyer into the family room. Pressing her right knee into Callie's core, she resumed their kissing, roughly grasping at the Latina's breasts through the silky fabric of the deep purple cocktail dress she wore.

"I _said_ - you're mine tonight," Callie murmured as she pushed Arizona down onto the couch. "You don't get to be in charge."

Arizona only smirked sexily as she tilted her head to the side to study the beautiful woman standing before her, their eyes locking as Callie straddled the blonde's lap. Pushing the fabric of her wife's dress upward to allow her greater movement, Arizona caressed and squeezed the newly exposed caramel skin of her hips.

Callie's hands travelled down Arizona's chest, gently stroking smooth skin before grazing her breasts with her palms, her nipples hardening to a point. Leaning forward, she captured Arizona's lips in an open mouth kiss as she lowered herself to grind her center against her wife. Moving her mouth away from her inviting lips, the Latina licked the shell of her ear before blowing cool air against it. Arizona giggled once again as she pressed her hips upward to meet her wife's heated center.

"You're super ticklish tonight. And super _giggly_," Callie mused when she pulled back to look at her, a megawatt smile on her face.

"Well, I'm super happy." _Peck. _"A little tipsy." _Peck. _"And so hot for you right now that I might implode if you don't touch me soon."

Callie grinned, pecking Arizona's lips quickly before removing herself from her lap. As she turned from her, Callie grabbed a blanket from the back of the couch, spreading it onto the floor in front of the fireplace that had been burning all evening long. Grabbing throw pillows from the couch and nearby chairs, she scattered them about the floor. "Come here, beautiful," she urged, grabbing Arizona's hand and pulling her to her feet.

Staring into her beautiful blue eyes, Callie's hands travelled down her wife's sides to where her skirt ended just above her knees before grasping the material and pushing it up the length of her body and over her head. To return the favor, Arizona's hands moved to Callie's back, effortlessly lowering the zipper of her dress with deft fingers. Once they both were rid of their dresses, Callie's hands immediately reached for the black lace panties that were denying her access to the blonde's pleasure center that lie beneath.

Kneeling before her wife, Callie nudged the front of her lace covered center with her nose, reveling in the dampness that began to saturate the thin fabric. Hooking her thumbs in the waistband, she removed the garment allowing Arizona to step from it before pulling her down to kneel in front of her. "I've got you," she stated when she saw the skepticism in the blonde's eyes.

Reaching behind her, Callie unfastened her matching black lace bra, effectively releasing perfect breasts from their lacy confinement. "Perfect," Callie murmured as her mouth latched onto a turgid nipple, her right hand tweaking the other to a hardened bud.

Arizona leaned forward, pressing Callie back onto the mountain of pillows laid out in front of the crackling fireplace. As she guided the Latina's panties down her silky smooth curves, she licked her lips subconsciously as delicious folds swollen with arousal were revealed to her. Grinning seductively, she met her wife's gaze before sticking out her tongue and licked her way up and down Callie's wet slit, parting moist folds with her tongue along the way.

"God, baby," Callie moaned, her hips rocking her drenched core into the blonde's hot mouth. "Mmm, so good."

Chuckling softly, Arizona moved her mouth from where her wife needed her most as she began to lick and suck her inner thighs, paying special attention to the spot behind Callie's right knee that never ceased to make the woman tremble. Soft moans grew louder as Arizona continued to lick, kiss, and suck her way up her wife's body. When she reached moist parted lips, she slipped her tongue inside, engaging her wife's hot mouth in an intimate tryst of lips, teeth, and tongues.

Pulling away breathlessly, she straddled Callie's hips, pulling her upward into a sitting position. Reaching forward, she lightly stroked the curve of her wife's breasts spilling over the top of her deep purple bra before unfastening the clasp at its front and tossing it to the side. Arizona pressed her erect nipples into those of her wife before cupping each breast, bending her head down to pull a hardened nub into her mouth, rolling it gently between white teeth.

"Mmmm, Arizona!" Callie ground out, lifting her hips from the floor. "I need to feel you against me." Locking eyes with Arizona, she grasped her slim hips, pulling her engorged center closer to her own, gasping loudly when she felt her wife's hot essence coat her lower abdomen and pubic bone. Callie's hand trailed between their heated bodies, her fingers lightly grazing across her lover's clit. Moving downward, she slowly dipped her index finger into Arizona's opening before slowly drawing it out, her wife's wetness clinging to her finger. Reaching forward, she ran her wet finger over Arizona's already moist lips before quickly leaning forward to lick the arousal from its owner's mouth. "You taste so good," Callie husked into her mouth.

No longer able to control the unbridled lust and arousal that had been building inside of her for most of the evening, Arizona instantly smashed her lips against Callie's, her mind reeling from the tang of her own arousal mixed with the familiar flavor of her wife's mouth. Reluctantly pulling away, she reached down to quickly remove her prosthesis before roughly forcing her center against her wife's throbbing clit, her darkened blue eyes locking with the now black orbs of her wife. "Oh, God," Callie groaned as she stared into lust filled eyes. "That feels so good. More, baby."

Arizona tangled her hands into thick brunette locks as she roughly rolled her hips, creating a luscious friction of clit against clit, aroused nipples against aroused nipples. Callie met Arizona's rhythm, further igniting the heat she felt in the pit of her stomach as it began to spiral out of control.

"Harder, Callie!" Arizona demanded, throwing her head back on her shoulders, her eyes beginning to roll into the back of her head as her wife obeyed her commands. "Oh, fuck! Yes baby!"

"God, Arizona!" Callie moaned, as she furiously ground their clits together. "I'm gonna. . .oh fuck!" she screamed as an orgasm ripped through her entire body, leaving her drenched core pulsing uncontrollably, her muscles rigid and shuddering violently.

Arizona continued to rock against Callie's throbbing center as the Latina roughly squeezed her breasts, increasing her pace as she rapidly approached her own earth shattering climax. Screaming in ecstasy, she bit down on her bottom lip, her eyes slamming shut as unrelenting spasms quaked through her core.

Unable to remain sitting upright, Callie leaned back, dragging the trembling blonde down with her to lie on top of her. Their breathing ragged, Callie ran her fingers over the small of Arizona's back, drawing random patterns in an attempt to calm her gasping breaths and racing heart. As they both regained their senses, their lips once again met in a sensual dance of passion and lust.

"Oh my God," Callie whispered, breathlessly pulling away. "Wow."

"I think it's safe to say that this room has now been christened," Arizona teased, chuckling softly as she pressed her hips firmly into the Latina's causing her to shiver as a small orgasmic pulse surged through her.

"So, that's what? 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 rooms down?" Callie pondered, ticking off the number of rooms of their new home that they had already gotten lucky in.

"Five," Arizona countered with a smirk. "I think you're probably forgetting the night I went down on you in the study."

Callie chuckled softly as she rolled on top of her wife. "You're right, I was forgetting that, though I'm not sure how," she scoffed.

"We'll just have to do it again sometime to help you commit it to memory," Arizona stated with a sexy smile.

"Such a big house with so many rooms," Callie mused as she began kissing along her wife's jawline. "How are we ever going to find the time to christen them all?"

"Oh, I think we'll manage."

* * *

**AN4: **Spanish isn't my thing, but here is a rough translation of Callie's curses in the kitchen:

"_Damn it! This is crazy. Why are the cabinets so high? Mother Fucker!_

"_Mother Fucker! I hate this kitchen!"_

"_Son of a bitch! I can't find a damn thing I'm looking for. Bastard!"_

"_Fuck!"_

LOL!

**AN5: **Just one more chapter to go, but before we get to that, I really hope you enjoyed this one. I think it's one of my personal favorites. As always, your reviews and comments are forever welcome! Thanks!


	20. Chapter 20

**Title:** When It Don't Come Easy

**Author:** HandsThatHeal

**Beta:** Funkyshaz57

**Pairing:** Callie/Arizona

**Rating:** NC-17

**Summary:** After watching Arizona turn away from the people who love her most as she struggles both physically and emotionally to come to terms with the injuries she sustained in the plane crash, Callie decides to take matters into her own hands by embarking on a cross country adventure with Arizona and Sofia in hopes of reaffirming their love for each other and deciding if they have what it takes to carry on as a family.

**Disclaimer:** All television shows, books, movies, songs, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work and the characters, events, and settings thereof are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.

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**AN: **A huge thank you to Funkyshaz57 who is never afraid to tell me when my writing is less than stellar. Thanks so much for all of your help along the way and for always being honest with me!

**AN2: **Well folks, here it is. Writing this story has been a wonderful experience/journey for me as well as the characters, and I'm glad so many people have enjoyed it along the way. Thanks so much to those who stuck around with me from beginning to end (whether you loved it or hated it.) I'm really going to miss writing this. Thanks again! ENJOY!

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**Chapter 20:**

An icy chill to her feet and toes combined with a persistent ache in her shoulders and neck slowly pulled Callie from the comfort of her dreams. Still lying on the blanket covered hardwood floor in front of a now nearly extinguished fire in the hearth, she stretched her legs and then her back, groaning softly at the stiffness she felt in her tired muscles. Her groan soon morphed into a contented smile as she extended her arms from under the warmth of the blanket. Sighing softly, she quickly snuggled back into the comfort of the covers that she had hastily pulled over their rapidly cooling and completely sated bodies just hours before. Fully opening her eyes as she rolled onto her right side where she last remembered her gloriously naked wife pleasantly cuddled into her own body, Callie was surprised to find herself alone.

Quickly sitting up, she looked around the room, groaning once again at the stiffness in her aching muscles. As she wrapped the blanket more snugly around her body, Callie stood slowly, noting that their passionately discarded clothing had been picked up, along with the few stray wine glasses and tumblers left by their party guests.

After searching the entire first floor of their home for her missing wife, Callie made her way up the winding staircase toward the master bedroom, sure that the blonde had gotten cold on the hardwood floor and made her way up to the serenity of their room. Pushing open the door, she was surprised to find the bed still perfectly made, throw pillows adorning it like a picture from a page of _ELLE DECOR_ magazine. Throwing the blanket onto the bed, Callie grabbed a pair of flannel pajama pants and a thermal Henley shirt, quickly covering her chilled body. Slipping into a pair of fuzzy slippers and a hooded sweatshirt, she exited the bedroom, stopping first to check on Sofia.

Gazing into the soft purple bedroom, she smiled at the site of Sofia sprawled unceremoniously on the white toddler bed. Quietly padding into the room, she pulled the brightly colored owl adorned quilt up over the toddler's body, gently kissing her forehead. Callie pushed silky dark hair back from her angelic face as she adoringly watched her sleep for a few brief moments. Satisfied that Sofia was safe and sound in the warmth of her bed, she then exited the room, once again in search of her AWOL lover. Checking the study, the playroom, and the two remaining bedrooms, Callie began to worry at her inability to locate Arizona.

As she descended the stairs, Callie briefly wondered if this evening had been too much. Maybe the dress, the guests, and the conversation concerning their trip, intermingled with talk of the crash and her leg, had been more than she could handle. Quickly pushing those thoughts into the far recesses of her mind, she considered that perhaps Arizona had been paged into the hospital. Grabbing her phone from the bar in the kitchen, she checked it for any messages that would lead her to the location of her wife. Finding none, she peeked into the garage noting the presence of both of their cars. Happy that Arizona was at least present in their house somewhere, she poured herself a glass of water.

Looking out the kitchen windows, Callie squinted her eyes, trying to focus on the lounge chairs positioned on the deck. Stepping closer, her suspicions were confirmed when she saw the top of Arizona's head, blonde hair thrown up into a messy ponytail, relaxing on the double chaise lounge. Stepping back toward the stove, Callie lit the burner to heat some water in the teapot, content to just stand for a moment and watch her wife.

* * *

When Arizona awoke an hour prior, she tried mightily to return to her slumber cocooned in the warmth and security of her lover's arms. After several minutes without success, she resigned herself to the fact that, while she should still be sleeping, her body and mind were unwilling to allow her that luxury. Gently placing a whisper of a kiss against Callie's lips, she lovingly watched her sleep before sitting up and reaching for her prosthesis. Assured that it was donned appropriately, she wrapped herself in the only remaining blanket left in the family room. Making sure that the Latina was completely covered, Arizona stood from her spot, grabbing their discarded dresses and undergarments before making her way to the stairs.

After bundling herself in a pair of flannel pajama pants and an oversized sweatshirt, she threw her hair into a messy ponytail and put on a pair of UGG boots. Assured that Sofia was comfortably bundled in her bed, she descended the stairs. Quietly moving about the family room, she picked up forgotten wine glasses and tumblers from their party just hours before. Glancing once more toward her sleeping wife, she smiled lovingly as she watched the Latina sleeping peacefully before moving out of the house to cuddle up with a thick wool blanket on the double chaise lounge on the deck.

Looking up toward the stars, she closed her eyes, a contented sigh leaving her lips. She wasn't shocked, but had to admit to herself that she was a little surprised at how well the evening had gone - how happy and confident she felt. The look on Callie's face when she descended the stairs wearing a dress was more than enough to calm her tremulous nerves, allowing her to wholly enjoy the company of their friends. And then - my God - the way Callie made love to her not just once, but three times, on the floor of their family room in front of a sweltering fire, made her feel more like her old self than she had in months. Arizona could honestly say that, right now, as she sat on the deck of the beautiful new home she shared with her wife and daughter, she was happier than she had ever been.

Snuggling deeper into the lounge as she pulled the blanket tightly around her, she couldn't help but remember a time when she didn't think she would survive long enough to see her beautiful wife and daughter again, let alone be around long enough to get remarried, legally adopt Sofia as her own, and become a mortgage paying homeowner. Worrying her bottom lip between her teeth, Arizona tilted her head to the side as her memories consumed her.

_She was sitting on the left side of the plane, facing the cockpit. Mark was across the aisle from her, and Cristina was in the seat behind her. Meredith and Derek were across from Christina, with Lexie behind her. _

_The flight should have lasted less than one hour and thirty minutes. The first two hours passed by uneventfully, but soon, they flew into heavy clouds, and the small aircraft started to shake. Looking out the window, she could see that they were rocking or vibrating, but not falling. The engine noise changed. Distinctly. Were they running out of gas?_

_Then it got eerily quiet as it became more and more obvious that something wasn't right. The engine continued to lose power. Their altitude was slipping. The plane started to roll from side to side. A second later, she felt a powerful jolt like they had been hit from behind. The aircraft started lurching and bumping in the air. They continued to descend as she peered to the left out the window. She could see the top of a thick canopy of trees, and next thing she knew, they were falling through the air as the plane went into a nosedive._

_Falling head first with the seatbelt digging into her stomach, the engine suddenly roared back to life. Too late. The tail hit first. The plane's left wing clipped the tree tops, sending the damaged airliner into a tumble of death. It sheared off the tops of Hemlock, Red Cedar, Aspen, and Birch, leaving a half-mile-long trail of wreckage, luggage, and surgical notes. The plane somersaulted, the windows shattered. She remembered hearing twisting metal and feeling a rush of cold, cold air. She felt them hit the ground; they bounced, and then skidded to a halt._

_The next thing Arizona could remember was the sound of screaming. Incessant screaming that just wouldn't stop. She couldn't think, and she just needed the screaming to stop. Then she heard Cristina shouting. "Shut up! Just shut up!" And that was when she realized that the noise wasn't coming from an external source, but that it was coming from her. She was the one screaming._

_She remembered lying on the ground, unable to really move. However, Mark, Christina, and Meredith seemed to be in fairly decent shape, so they went to look for their lost loved ones. They left her terrified and alone in search of Derek Shepherd and Lexie Grey._

_Drawing from her inner strength, she pulled herself off the ground and sat up against the plane. Her left leg hurt so, so badly, and she knew without a doubt that it was broken. There was a puncture in her scrub pants, so she ripped them apart the rest of the way. What she saw there was more than she had anticipated, causing her first to hyperventilate and then to burst into a fit of laughter as she suffered a little bit of shock._

_Lexie was dead, Jerry was paralyzed, the wound in Derek's arm was held together by a safety pin, Mark had a hairspray bottle hanging from his chest keeping him alive, and she had splinted her own shattered leg. Did all of that really happen in just the first four hours?_

_They were stranded on the side of that mountain for four days. Arizona knew that in the grand scheme of life, four days was just a drop in the bucket, but these particular four days would forever alter her existence. They were four horrible, terrifying days, and for four days, all she could remember thinking about was Callie and Sofia. They were all that kept her going. She recalled how desperately she wanted to get back to them and how scared she was that she might never again see their beautiful faces. _

_As the days passed, Arizona pondered Callie raising Sofia alone. She couldn't help but imagine Callie taking their little girl to her first day of kindergarten, teaching her to ride a bike, and later to drive a car. Images of a stunningly beautiful Latina with her mother's dark hair and eyes and caramel skin, but with her father's nose flashed through her weary mind as she walked across a stage to graduate from high school, college, and then medical school. Then she saw her equally beautiful mother with greying hair giving Sofia away at her wedding. Would their little girl be happily married to a man? To a woman? Would she have children of her own? Would Callie raise Sofia alone, or would she find someone else worthy of her love? That thought alone was simply too much for her to bear._

_More and more upset by the incessant thoughts that plagued her mind, Arizona remembered when the unfettered rage began to rise within her. She was just outright pissed. Pissed at Alex because the only reason she went on that plane was because she was pissed at him for being so thoughtless and so unappreciative of everything she had done for him. And then pissed at Mark for not fighting harder. She remembered hating herself for feeling that way, but at that point in time, full of so much despair, she couldn't help it. She begged him to stay alive so they could go home together to Callie and Sofia, but he just lay there, and he just kept dying. Cristina kept saving him, and he just kept dying. Arizona recalled the times she pleaded with Mark, begging him to stay alive. She couldn't understand why he didn't want to go home to Callie and Sofia as much as she did. All she wanted was to go home, and she kept telling herself that if she did indeed make it home, Callie would know what to do to fix her leg._

_As angry as she was at him for not fighting harder, she would swear until the day she died that as strong as she tried to be and as much as she fought to make it home to her family, Mark Sloan and Cristina Yang were what actually kept her alive. Mark was so warm, and as he lay on her lap or next to her, he provided her injured body with the heat it required to continue functioning. And Cristina - Arizona shuddered as she recalled Cristina trying desperately to keep the bugs out of the gaping wound in her leg._

_As the days continued to pass, Arizona's exhausted mind jumped from thoughts of Sofia running through the park and Callie cooking Chicken Picatta as she sang and danced around the kitchen, to thoughts as inane as whether or not she remembered to schedule that month's car payment. And her parents. Had Callie called them? Oh, God - her poor parents._

_At some point, she recalled some statistics she had seen on CNN years before. Surprisingly, she remembered that people were much more likely to walk away from an airline accident than were to die in one. She recalled Wolfe Blitzer reporting that in the most serious crashes, something like 76 percent of those on board lived to tell the tale. Most survivable accidents didn't occur in mid-flight. In fact, most crashes occurred during the first 3 minutes after takeoff, or the last 8 minutes before the landing. So that was a good thing, right? She was sure that they were about to land, just before the crash. She mused at the things a mind could recollect while under duress. _

_Time just continued to pass, with no relief - no rescue. Jerry was suffering from autonomic dysreflexia. They ran out of water. There were no more matches. Cristina continued her attempts at keeping the bugs out of her leg, and she was pretty sure that rabid animals ate Lexie._

_Sometime late on the fourth day as a crescent moon shone high above the trees, the faint sound of a helicopter woke her from a haze of febrile sleep. She vaguely remembered someone screaming - perhaps it was Cristina - she wasn't sure. The next thing she was aware of was someone pulling Mark away from her. Was that the last time she saw him? She honestly couldn't recall._

_In a whirlwind of activity, she remembered being loaded into the helicopter and flying for what seemed like less than a minute to the hospital in Dump Truck, Idaho. Boise Memorial Hospital, she presumed. She remembered the staff there taking X-rays and then an MRI of her leg, but most of all she remembered the Chief of Emergency Medicine. The woman seemed so cold-hearted, and her bedside manner just outright sucked. Maybe she was just out of her depth and flustered by such a catastrophe, but all she wanted to do was call Callie, and that bitch - that yahoo - just kept ignoring her until she threw a fit so loudly in the middle of the Emergency Department that the doctor had no other choice than to dial the number to allow her to speak to her wife. _

Snuggling further into her blanket, Arizona chuckled as she recalled the pride she felt when she heard some of the nurses gossiping about how 'that Asian from the plane crash' had scratched the Hell of the Chief's face. Looking toward her phone that rested on the table beside the chaise lounge, she noted that it was nearly 3:00am. She knew she should be cuddled in her wife's arms in front of the fireplace or in their king sized bed, however, her mind continued working restlessly.

_The survivors agreed on being sedated in order to make the trip back to Seattle. She had begged Callie not to get on a plane, and she sure as Hell didn't want to be on one herself. Sedation was the only choice, but before she could be sedated, she made sure Owen knew that no one was to cut off her leg. She just needed to get back to Callie because she would know what to do._

_And then she was there. Back in Seattle. Back at the place where she met her beautiful wife and the place where their daughter was born. When she saw Callie standing, waiting for her in the room that would be hers for the next several weeks, she could no longer control her emotions. In Boise, she remained tough - tried to be strong, but when she saw Callie for the first time, her heart nearly stopped as relief flooded her being. The once vibrant Latina was pale and exhausted, but she was still her Calliope. She could tell that Callie wanted to cry, but she didn't. As Callie gathered her into her arms and rocked her soothingly, Arizona clung to her like a life raft in a tumultuous ocean of fear and despair. _

_And then her treatment began. She talked endlessly with Callie concerning her options. They decided to initially repair her leg with an external fixator while they administered rounds and rounds of IV antibiotics, trying to get the infection under control. Arizona wondered how Callie had managed to get any 'real' work done during her time at the hospital or how she was able to care for Sofia while running back and forth between herself and Mark. Arizona knew that Callie probably checked her leg at least ten times a day to make sure it was in proper alignment and that the surgical incisions were healing. After nearly six weeks in the external fixator, it was removed, leaving them to determine their next course of treatment. Callie wanted to wait. They still needed to get the infection under control, but the IV Vancomycin wasn't working. Arizona begged Callie to do something - to try something different. She begged her not to give up on her and not to let them take her leg. _

_Arizona remembered how hysterical she had become when she realized that her only option was to have her leg amputated, but Callie thought differently. She forced Owen to approve surgery for intramedullary nailing as the final repair even though they all knew that amputation would be best. _

_And then miraculously, she started to improve. They titrated the Vancomycin to Clacid like she had asked, and it worked. With each passing day, as she improved physically, she began to feel the joy again. She could feel herself slowly returning to her old self. She looked forward to each new day and felt more hopeful than she had in the entire two months she spent in the hospital. She had lunch with Callie and Sofia nearly every day and on the days when Callie was in surgery, Miranda Bailey would join the two. _

_All of that hope and joy was shattered the evening she woke up to find Callie at her bedside looking - what was the look on her face? Guilt? Shame? Fear? Had something happened during Derek's surgery? The last thing she remembered was telling her wife that she was outstanding - an amazingly good doctor - before kissing her goodbye as she went off to perform miracles by repairing Derek Shepherd's million dollar hand. Smiling in an attempt to lighten her wife's clearly morose mood, Arizona felt the earth - her world - shift on its axis the moment Callie began to speak._

_Her leg had to be amputated in order to save her life, but Callie had promised that she wouldn't let anyone take it. Callie was supposed to protect her. She was supposed to be her person. Arizona recalled wondering if she would ever be able to come to terms with the fact that the person she loved most in the world, was ultimately responsible for the worst thing that had ever happened to her._

_Arizona didn't even remember the days following the amputation as she sank into an endless sea of depression and hopelessness. Callie was there to support her – day in and day out – from the moment they returned to Seattle. She tried to protect her, but yet Callie – her guardian and the best thing in her life - also let her down. The rational part of her mind realized that had their positions been reversed, had Callie been lying in the hospital bed, she would have made the exact same decision. If the unspeakable options presented to her were the choice of living with Callie without a limb versus living without Callie at all, she would have come to the same harrowing conclusion. And yet, she was infinitely unable to metabolize her wife's choice. Callie had chosen to save her life at a time when her own desperate mind couldn't fathom living without such an integral part of her body._

_Consequently, she lay in bed for weeks – obstinately unable to comprehend and accept Callie's unimaginable decision. She lay in bed when Callie and Sofia needed her most – when Sofia lost a parent and Callie lost her best friend._

Arizona sighed, closing her eyes to fend off the memories.

_She remembered Callie's strangled pleas and infuriated demands to get up, get out of bed, and snap out of it. Completely lost in an endless sea of absolute denial, oppressive self-degradation, and tormenting depression, she had barely been able to process breathing, let alone anything else. And on top of all these profound deeply seeded emotions – she was also just flat out pissed. Pissed at herself. Pissed at Alex. Pissed at Callie. Pissed at the world._

_Arizona recalled how useless she felt. She was incapable of caring for herself, let alone caring for Sofia. So, with a heavy heart, she denied their daughter. She felt like she was drowning. She was hurt and lonely and just so mad, and in that moment, her intent was simply to wound her wife. She deluded herself into acting as if the child meant nothing to her. The rage that boiled inside of her made her want to physically throttle something or someone, but instead, she chose to wound with her spiteful words. She wanted Callie to feel every bit of the pain, sadness, frustration, and disappointment that had taken hold, relentlessly consuming and possessing her once joyful soul. By allowing those words to fly from her lips, Arizona felt in control of something._

_In the end, she had only made herself feel more miserable than before. How could she have denied this innocent child she loved unconditionally? How could she have done that when not that long ago, she remembered standing, insisting that Sofia was her baby, too? Not just Callie's and not just Mark's - but her baby too - only to reject her when she needed her most. _

_Arizona knew that their lowest point was the night Callie came to pick her up for a settlement meeting following the plane crash. Earlier that day, she had obstinately fired the home health nurse Callie had hired to assist her while she was away at work. She didn't trust that woman. All she did was watch television and send text messages while Arizona went about her own business - generally just lying in bed for the entire day. Arizona didn't need that nurse, she was useless and a waste of money. _

Arizona shuddered as she recalled the state she was in when Callie arrived home that night. Why had she been so stubborn? Why hadn't she just let Callie in? Why didn't she listen to her when she asked her to keep the wheelchair or her crutches nearby in case she needed them?

_She remembered the fear evident in her wife's eyes when she came to get her that night. Callie initially couldn't find her, and it was clear to Arizona that her wife's mind immediately jumped to the worst possible conclusion. Callie looked so defeated and so vulnerable, and they said horrible things to each other that night. Terrible, cruel things. Deep down, Arizona knew that Callie was trying to get her to understand that she couldn't do this on her own and that she needed to let people help her, though the words that actually spilled from her mouth were much less eloquent and much more cruel. She needed Callie to understand what it felt like to have her independence ripped right out from under her. She didn't want anyone to help her. Not the nurse, not Callie, not anyone. But, it was clear to Arizona that Callie didn't care about that anymore as she threw her arms around her neck, hoisting her up off the floor and into the shower, slamming her flailing body against the tiled wall. That night they both broke down. _

_Callie left for the meeting and returned home very late that night. That was the same night she was abruptly ripped from sleep screaming in agony, her face covered in sweat and tears as the most intense pain she had ever experienced burned like a raging inferno from the tip of her left big toe all the way up to her left knee. A left big toe and a left knee that her confused and horrified mind suddenly realized no longer existed. To this day, Arizona could still see the fear, yet steadfast protection in Callie's eyes as she came charging through the closed door of the bedroom they used to share from her position on the couch in the living room. Arizona had screamed at her, slapping Callie's hands away, the distress still present in her rigid movements and petrified face. Not deterred, Callie determinedly fought through her flailing arms and reached forward, her strong hands coming in contact with the battered limb. Without speaking, Callie began to apply pressure to and massage the amputated area trying desperately to relieve her wife's tense muscles in an attempt to lessen the horror of such profound and bewildering torture. _

_Arizona knew that that night, there was a clear shift in her behavior as well as in their relationship. While still resentful, she had slowly begun to heal. She forced herself to see light at the end of the darkness. She coerced her body up and out of bed, forcing herself to communicate with Callie. She compelled herself to productively participate with rehabilitation and to take the advice of a prosthetist._

_She recalled her hesitance to go into the hospital, even though Callie promised she wouldn't tell a living soul that she was there. She could barely stand to look at herself, and she certainly didn't need the nosey staff of SGMW ogling her. _

Arizona chuckled as she recalled the stupid joke David made the moment they met each other. Obviously her leg wasn't going to grow back, so of course she was going to have to work with him or another prosthetist periodically until the day she died.

_Though his humor was misplaced and often crude, he was right. Arizona now realized that David was good to her - good for her. He forced her to recognize that she had people in her corner and that she needed to let them in. He was right. She couldn't do it on her own. Callie loved her, and her co-workers were in her corner, as well. They all had her back. Why couldn't she let them in? Why did she always have so much trouble admitting weakness? She blamed her dad and her issues with authority._

_When she was finally able to speak constructively with David, instead of just lashing out, they worked together to get the best possible fit for her initial prosthesis. Arizona knew that that day was a breakthrough for her. On that day, for the first time in months, she realized that there was a chance that she could carry on - she could quite possibly survive this. She no longer felt like crawling into a tormented abyss where she could just die alone and miserable. Suddenly from some far reaching unknown place, a new resolve filled her being. She needed to figure out how to survive this. Callie was doing everything she could – everyone was being so supportive – but it was up to her. She needed to figure out how to get right with herself. How to make this hurt go away. _

_In time, she slowly found some peace with Callie, but their every interaction remained strained. Their conversations were uncomfortable – and Arizona could still barely fathom being touched or kissed, let alone allow Callie to make love to her. Callie stopped sleeping at Mark's, and they even at times, slept in the same bed again, though it was incredibly uncomfortable crowded on the small hospital bed. Even when they moved the hospital bed out and brought their old bed back in, it continued to be awkward, making for less than restful nights._

_She slowly began to interact with Sofia again. Arizona remembered one particular night in which she exited their bedroom to hear frustrated words coming from her wife as Sofia squealed happily. Entering the toddler's bedroom and then her bathroom, Arizona couldn't help the laughter that erupted from deep inside her upon seeing Callie dripping wet, drenched from head to toe as a result of a bath toy Mark had purchased for their toddler months prior. She recalled the surprised, yet excited look on her wife's face at her presence. That was the first night they laughed together in months. _

_That night, she resigned herself to the fact that this was her life. These were her girls, and she needed to be better for them. So, she worked hard. Callie encouraged her - she told her that she was progressing so well with the prosthesis, but Arizona still couldn't let her in. Callie was just too much pressure - she was pushing too hard - or maybe in reality, not enough. Her walking still wasn't perfect, and she hated using a cane. _

_But then, like a gift from God, Miranda Bailey called her out of nowhere, asking for help on a Peds Case at the hospital. She was busy, though - TRENDY magazine was excellent reading, and she was sure she had a US Weekly or a COSMO lying around somewhere, begging for her attention. She agreed, though. She agreed that an intern could bring her the file. So, she waited - someone would ring the bell. That was a given, right? _

_The moment she walked across the room to find no chart at her doorstep, Arizona knew that she had been set up. How could she have been so naive? There probably wasn't even a patient. Bailey probably made it up. It was probably just an elaborate scheme she and Callie cooked up to further pressure her. But still, she was curious. Maybe there really was a child at the hospital who needed her help. Maybe, even with only one leg, she could still be the amazing doctor that she once was. Arizona recalled the multiple phone calls she had with Bailey that day, and late that night, when it was more than obvious that there would be no chart left at her door, she allowed her curiosity get the better of her. She was still a doctor, right? Hadn't she taken an oath to 'prescribe regimens for the good of her patients according to her ability and her judgment and never do harm to anyone'? This counted, right?_

_So, she got dressed, applied a little makeup, and pulled her hair back out of her face. Throwing on her coat, she reluctantly grabbed her cane. It felt good to leave the house. How long had it been? _

_After all the fighting and all the hate, Arizona finally began to feel like herself again - the real Arizona Robbins. She was no longer the uncompromising woman so debilitated by depression that she could not physically remove herself from the bed - her words no longer dripping with accusation and condemnation. It had taken time, but Arizona was finally able to partially come to terms with the fact that ultimately her leg had to be amputated. It had to be amputated in order to save her life. With Callie's continued support and tough love – though it was incessantly unwelcomed – the rational thoughts of the doctor inside her were able to overcome the unreasonable judgments made at the scathing loss of her limb. Through this, she had reconciled with the fact that, while Callie was ultimately responsible for the amputation, she was not to blame._

_Upon the acceptance of this revelation, there was a clear shift in her behavior as well as in their relationship. While still resentful, Arizona slowly began to heal. She forced herself to see light at the end of the darkness. The week after Bailey had coerced her into the hospital, Arizona insisted upon returning to work on light duty. Two weeks after that, she personally placed her name back on the surgical schedule._

_Even though she was progressing by leaps and bounds, Arizona knew that she was still struggling both physically and emotionally. She couldn't admit that, though. She had come so far. How could she still be struggling?_

_Arizona would always remember the door of the enormous gleaming black recreation vehicle opening to reveal a stunning Latina bounding down the few steps to land on the sidewalk with a flourish, a megawatt smile gracing her face. My God, how happy and excited Callie looked. She recalled closing her eyes the moment she saw her, as she tried to take a snapshot in her head of Callie's smile. She missed that beaming megawatt grin – she missed a lot of things. _

_Callie wanted to take her away from everything. She wanted to take her and Sofia and go away together as a family. It really was a lovely gesture, but even then Arizona knew that she kept fighting against her. Her Type A personality, along with the anger she constantly seemed to harbor - once again took hold of her already fragile emotional state - and again she lashed out. _

_Why was she still fighting Callie so hard? She knew that her feelings were certainly warranted, at least most of the time, but she also knew that at times, she was being more than a little petulant and perhaps even a little bitchy. She realized that all Callie was guilty of was loving her and knew that her own fears and insecurities were creating the chasm between herself and Callie. So why was she still pushing her away? _

_She remembered reluctantly ascending the stairs of the RV after making Alex Karev promise that he would not destroy her department. As she took her seat in the passenger's seat, she knew this was only the beginning. It was now or never - but at least she was there. They were both there together. They certainly had more to say, more insecurities to bear, more tears to cry, and most definitely more wounds to heal, but in that moment, Arizona was content to be present with her wife._

_And so, their journey began. Literally a journey taken on roads, regardless of the stops en route. Figuratively a journey of reaffirmation, healing, and reconciliation, regardless of the bumps along the way. Once they learned to be honest and not hide from each other, everything began to work itself out. That cross country road trip in the big ass bus that Callie bought was more therapeutic than any session with a therapist ever could be._

_Arizona remembered the moment when she was finally able to see past the physical. What a wonderful moment that was. For so long, she was preoccupied by the obvious. She now only had one leg, and she was worried that her femininity was somehow compromised by this loss of her limb. Soon, however, she was finally able to see the bigger picture. Re-building her self-esteem would be an ongoing process, but with Callie's love and support, there was a way of fighting back. As her confidence increased, she began to feel attractive and sexy again. The first night that Callie made love to her after so many months was indescribable. That night, she felt more grounded and secure in their relationship than she had in a very long time. It was nothing short of amazing, not just because of the sex, but because she was finally able to let Callie in both emotionally and physically. She finally allowed the protective walls she had erected to crumble, fully trusting her wife with the knowledge of the absolute worst and most terrifying event that had ever happened to her._

_Of course, just when everything was going amazingly, they faltered. Two steps forward, three steps back. Just when she started to believe that this harebrained idea of Callie's was just what they needed, all of her insecurities came crashing down around her. In the aftermath of the amputation, Arizona recalled spending a lot of time on the floor. On the bathroom floor, on the floor in their living room, on the floor of the OR. The truth was that she fell a lot - but that particular fall while holding Sofia was just too much. Arizona remembered once again starting to second guess herself. She felt useless and wholly incapable of caring for her own child. _

_That night, she and Callie came to a very important conclusion. They needed to be honest with each other. They always seemed to get themselves into so much trouble by not talking. After all of this time, why were they so afraid of each other? Arizona knew the answer to that question instantly. Because they both knew that they had the power to break the other. They knew it would be unbearable to live without the other, so when they messed up, when they hurt one another, they just swept things under the rug. It wasn't a good thing, it was just their thing. Arizona recalled that realization being the moment of a whole new beginning for them.  
_

_She realized that in order to love Callie, she needed to love herself, but i_t was so much easier to blame than to take a good hard look at herself. _ It wasn't Callie's responsibility to change her self-image or to fix her self-doubt. It was her's and her's alone. After coming to that realization, she really felt like everything was going to be okay. The past several months had been Hell on Earth, but she finally felt like they were stepping out of the darkness and into the light. And then, suddenly they were getting legally married, she was adopting Sofia as her own, and they were buying the beautiful home which just that evening had been filled with more love and more joy than she ever could have imagined._

Arizona was pulled from her reverie by the buzzing of her cell phone. Confused at who would be texting her at this time of night or day, however she chose to look at it, she grinned when she saw a picture of Callie staring back at her. Flicking her thumb across the screen, she read her text message.

_Hot Cocoa? Tea? Me? :o)_

_Tea, please. _

_Just tea?_

_And you, of course. Always you! :oP_

Arizona smiled as she cuddled even further into the comfort of the lounge. She would forever be thankful to Callie for all that she had done. She saved her life. She saved their marriage and made her realize just how much she had to live for. Most importantly, though, Callie taught her to love again. To love Callie. To love Sofia. To love herself.

Stepping out the deck door and pulling it closed behind her, Callie studied her wife momentarily, noting the pensive look on her face. "Hey," she called softly, juggling two mugs of steaming liquid, two extra blankets, and a baby monitor in her hands.

"Hey," Arizona replied, looking over her shoulder toward her wife.

"You okay?" Callie asked as she stepped closer, handing a mug to the shivering blonde. "It's freezing out here."

Arizona only smiled before taking a sip of piping hot liquid and setting it aside. "Come here," she requested simply.

Callie immediately set down her mug and after throwing both blankets over the blonde, she slipped underneath to join her. Cuddling closer to Arizona, Callie settled in behind her, securely wrapping her arms around her waist. "I feel very old," she stated as she kissed her temple before resting her chin on her shoulder. "The hardwood floor is not my friend. I may not be able to walk in the morning."

Arizona chuckled as she nuzzled her nose against Callie's. "I may not be able to walk in the morning, but it will be for reasons much more pleasurable than sleeping on the hardwood floor."

"Hah!" Callie barked laughter. "You loved it!" she said as she nipped at her wife's ear.

"Hey," Arizona teased, a dimpled grin on her face. "I wasn't complaining," she admitted, pecking at Callie's lips.

They sat in comfortable silence for several moments, both content to just be in the others presence. "Thank you," Arizona finally whispered into the night.

"For what, sweetie?" Callie asked, a slightly confused look on her face as she turned toward her.

"For saving my life. For saving our marriage. For making me realize how much I still have to live for," Arizona immediately responded. "For loving me."

"I will _always_ love you, Arizona."

"I know," she replied without hesitation. "But it's more than that. It's more than you loving me. You taught me how to love myself again, Calliope. You helped me learn to accept myself as I am and to value my imperfections. Because of you, I'm able to accept love and joy back into my heart. I'll never be able to repay you for that."

"No payment necessary," Callie said with a smile. "And in my eyes, you. Are. Perfect. Nothing will ever change that," she admitted as she gently brushed her lips against Arizona's. "But, it wasn't just me. I don't deserve all the credit. It would have been the easiest thing in the world for you to just give up, but you didn't. You're so strong, Arizona. You fought against all the odds. You held it together and fought back when everyone else would have understood if you completely fell apart. I was just there to give you a little push."

Arizona studied her wife's face before lovingly caressing her cheek, no words necessary. Cuddling back into Callie's arms, she let out a contented sigh. "I'm really happy."

"Me, too."

"I can just see us ten years from now in this big ol' house, with a bunch of kids running around."

Callie looked toward her wife, a stunned look on her face. "A bunch of kids, huh?"

Arizona shrugged, grinning at Callie's surprise. "Maybe," she teased.

"We'll see," Callie replied happily, nearly giddy at her wife's admission.

Arizona sat up, pulling the blankets with her as she moved to straddle her wife's lap. Wrapping her arms around her neck, she settled more firmly against her body. "Callie, I don't know what's going to happen tomorrow or the next day, or even the next, but what I do know is that you and I together are stronger than we could ever be apart. There is nothing that our love can't conquer - no door that our love can't open. Our love can resolve any problem and weather any storm."

Callie gazed lovingly into Arizona's cerulean eyes before leaning forward to take possession of her chilled lips. Pulling her down completely on top of her and holding the blanket tightly around their bodies, Callie softly moaned into Arizona's mouth as they continued their passionate exploration of each other.

At some point they made a decision. They decided that love is a choice, and that there is no weakness in being able to forgive. Together, they suffered. Together, they lost. Together, they chose to back each other up without limits, to allow themselves to grow without borders, and to love without end. When Arizona pushed, Callie pulled. She pulled her directly into the journey of a lifetime. Without even knowing it, Callie began their journey by simply reaching out and taking Arizona's hand. The beautiful journey into their future began when they learned to let go of the past and chose to discover things about themselves that they never considered before. Like a road, their journey didn't lead them in a straight line. Some roads they peeked down and took a few steps, others they committed to and travelled down for way too long. They got lost at too many intersections, but ultimately they found that all roads were connected. The roads they travelled were connected, just like their hearts. It didn't matter what they did or where they went, no matter the traffic or roadblocks or wrong turns, the beauty of their journey came when they realized that they needed to turn around. They needed to turn around and accept that there are no boundaries or barriers when two people are destined to be together. Because for them, it was simple. They were made for each other.

**The End**

"People are like stained-glass windows. They sparkle and shine when the sun is out, but when the darkness sets in their true beauty is revealed only if there is light from within."

- Elisabeth Kübler-Ross

* * *

**AN3: **I really, really hope you enjoyed this ending. As always, please feel free to let me know what you think. Have a great week!


	21. Epilogue

**Title:** When It Don't Come Easy

**Author:** HandsThatHeal

**Beta:** Funkyshaz57

**Pairing:** Callie/Arizona

**Rating:** NC-17

**Summary:** After watching Arizona turn away from the people who love her most as she struggles both physically and emotionally to come to terms with the injuries she sustained in the plane crash, Callie decides to take matters into her own hands by embarking on a cross country adventure with Arizona and Sofia in hopes of reaffirming their love for each other and deciding if they have what it takes to carry on as a family.

**Disclaimer:** All television shows, books, movies, songs, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work and the characters, events, and settings thereof are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.

**AN: **Hello all! I just wanted to thank all of you who stuck around with me throughout the journey of this story. There were mixed feelings about the final chapter, some people loved it while a few hated it. All I can say is that I am so happy that most people enjoyed it. For those who didn't, I guess maybe I'll have better luck the next time around. :o) For now, though, here is just a little something extra for your entertainment! Enjoy!

* * *

**Epilogue:**

"Are you sure she's ready?" Miranda asked from where she stood next to Callie while scrubbing out from their final surgery of the day.

"She says she is," Callie replied, shaking the excess water from her hands. Leaning back against the lip of the sink as she dried her hands on a blue surgical towel, she shrugged her shoulders. "She wasn't ready to go last year when the other three went, but she wants to try it now. She says it's something she needs to do."

Miranda considered the unease on her friend's face. "Are you sure _you're_ ready?"

Callie sighed. "I honestly don't know. I _want_ to be there for her. I mean, I _am_ there for her. I'll do whatever she needs." She shook her head. "I guess I'm just afraid. We've certainly had our ups and downs. None of this has been easy."

Miranda studied Callie a moment longer. "Nothing worth doing is ever easy," she stated matter-of-factly before moving to exit the scrub room.

Callie smiled slightly, considering her words. "I just don't _ever_ want to go back to the way we were immediately following the crash," she admitted as she followed Miranda out the door. "We barely survived that."

"But you _did _survive it. More than _survived_ it, if you ask me," the shorter surgeon replied. "You grew. You blossomed. You're better together now than you were before. . .and even then you two were about as much happy as any person could bear."

Callie chuckled softly as they made their way down the OR hallway. "I'm _so _glad you don't do personal stuff," she teased, nudging her friend with her elbow.

"You can't fault me for that, Torres," she huffed with a roll of her eyes. "I've been working with all you scandalous fools for way too long."

* * *

"Did you pack diapers?" Arizona asked; bras, underwear, and socks flying from the chest of drawers as she anxiously moved around the master bedroom. "Where's Little Miss?"

"I did," Callie answered offhandedly. ". . .and Sofia is downstairs doing evening PT with your dad," she continued from her position against the headboard of their king size bed, five-month-old Aiden facing her, his chubby fingers grasping her thumbs as he attempted to sit up unassisted. "Oh! I think he's getting a tooth! Come look, babe!" she exclaimed with a huge smile as she leaned forward to closer examine the baby's drool filled mouth.

Arizona dropped a handful of clothes into the open suitcase at the foot of the bed. Crawling up to sit next to her wife, she squeezed Aiden's chubby cheeks with one hand as she peered into his mouth. "What are we going to do with you?" she asked teasingly as she pulled him into her lap. "You're already getting to be such a big boy!"

Aiden Timothy Robbins Torres came screaming into the world on December 24, 2014, at 4:56pm, one month before his due date. Weighing in at five pounds, eleven ounces, he had a full head of dark hair and caramel skin, but the exact same angelic facial features of his biological mother. He suffered minimal to no complications, but spent three nights in his momma's NICU as a precaution and at Arizona's near hysterical insistence.

When Callie and Arizona started the process of making baby number two over a year prior to his birth, they agreed that Callie would once again carry the child, but opted to use Arizona's egg with a Latino sperm donor. At that time, they considered the future possibility of baby number three, but after Aiden's early delivery, Callie was adamant that her body was simply not willing to be a "_baby house"_ for the appropriate amount of time, thus making Mr. Aiden Robbins Torres the final addition to their family.

Callie pensively watched her wife as she cheerfully played with their son. Leaning toward her, she kissed her temple. "You sure you're ready to do this?"

Arizona didn't immediately respond, and Callie noticed her shoulders become rigid, the carefree smile slowly leaving her face. Finally turning toward her wife, Arizona blew out a breath. "I'm sure," she firmly stated with a nod of her head. "It's been three years, Calliope. I'm ready. I want - no I _need_ to do this."

Callie briefly regarded the steadfast set of her wife's features. "Okay," she agreed as she pecked at Arizona's lips before standing from the bed. "You play with McDrooly, and I'll finish packing."

* * *

"Just take a minute, Arizona. It's okay, sweetie," Callie tried to sooth as she quickly handed Aiden to Barbara before leading Arizona to a row of chairs in the middle of Seattle-Tacoma International Airport. "Breathe. . .breathe."

Arizona gulped for air, her mind racing as she settled herself into a hard plastic seat, her hands clenched into fists against her furrowed brow. "They can't g-g-go. . .Callie," she stammered, tears forming in her eyes. "I-I-I don't want them to go. I thought it would be okay, but it's not. Sofia and-and Aiden. They can't go. It's not safe."

Callie knelt in front of her distraught wife as she glanced sidelong towards her in-laws and children. Taking Arizona's clammy hands into her own, she gently pressed their foreheads together. "Listen to me, Arizona," she stated firmly, though the love and affection she felt was still evident in her tone. Pulling back slightly to meet watery blue eyes, Callie pushed through. "It's okay. We're all okay. None of us have to go anywhere. We don't have to fly to Boise. We can drive, or we can all go back home. . .or just you and I can go. Your parents can stay here in Seattle with Sofia and Aiden. It's okay, sweetie. We'll do whatever you need. Our babies are safe, Arizona. We're all safe."

Arizona leaned back from her wife, her eyes closing as a staggering breath forced itself from deep within her chest. Slowly opening her eyes, she swallowed thickly as she stared into the depths of abiding loyalty present in Callie's chocolate orbs. Shaking her head, she once again closed her eyes, unremitting fear coursing through her veins.

"Are you scared, momma?" four-year-old Sofia asked as she released her grandfather's hand and stepped closer to her mothers.

Arizona opened her eyes at the sound of the adorable voice, quickly wiping stray tears from her cheeks. Plastering a smile onto her face, she sighed. "Yeah, big girl, momma's a little scared."

Callie smoothed dark hair from Sofia's face as she kissed her forehead. "You should give momma a big hug, Sof," she whispered. "Just like she does when you're scared. Maybe that will help."

Sofia turned toward Arizona, wrapping her arms around her neck as she climbed onto her lap. "Don't be scared, momma. It's okay," she stated simply. Leaning away from her mother's embrace, she began to move her hands in a circular motion in front of Arizona's face. "Bad dreams, bad dreams, go away. Good dreams, good dreams, here to stay. Bad dreams, bad dreams, go away. . ."

"Good dreams, good dreams, here to stay," Callie tearfully repeated along with the child as she lifted herself from the floor to sit next to her wife.

"Bad dreams, bad dreams, go away. Good dreams, good dreams, here to stay."

"You have to say it three times, or it doesn't work," Sofia innocently added at the end.

Arizona let out a breathy chuckle through a wave of tears. "I know, baby. Thank you."

"That always helps when I'm scared, momma. You always help me when I have a bad dream."

Callie stood from her seat, her emotions threatening to overwhelm her after witnessing the sensitivity pour from Sofia's small form. Squeezing the sides of her eyes with her thumb and middle finger in an attempt to stave off the torrent of memories that filled her mind, she turned her back on the group, quickly wiping her face free of moisture. Clearing her throat in an attempt to strengthen her resolve, she slowly turned back around. "Would you mind staying at the house with the kids while Arizona and I go to Boise?" she asked as she took Aiden from Barbara's embrace.

"Of course we wouldn't mind," Barbara softly replied, her concerned attention focused intently on the struggling form of her daughter. "Whatever you two need."

Daniel stepped toward Arizona, taking the seat next to her. Placing his hand on her shoulder blade, he hesitated, considering his words. "You have to make your own decisions, Arizona, but I want you to listen to me for just one moment," he began, pausing briefly until he was sure he had her full attention. "You should never regret or be fearful of decisions you've already made. Never be sorry for what you did yesterday; it was what you wanted, what you chose. Accept that fact, and move forward. Never doubt yourself. Your mother and I raised you to be a good man in a storm, Arizona, and to protect the things you love. You are honorable and strong, and I know you can do this."

Arizona raised her chin from Sofia's shoulder, surprised by her usually stoic father's admission. Silence overwhelmed them, not one person in their group sure of what to say.

"Thanks, dad," Arizona finally whispered in reply. Nodding her head confidently, she kissed Sofia's cheek. "You'll be a good girl for Pop-Pop and Grammy, right? I want you to help them with your baby brother, okay?"

"Okay, momma," Sofia replied, quickly jumping from her lap.

Arizona briefly hugged her father before standing slowly on slightly tremulous legs. "Thank you," she stated as she embraced her mother. Turning toward her wife and son, a genuine smile graced her face. "I love you, baby boy," she said as she kissed his chubby cheek.

"Okay. . ." Callie stated after settling the baby back into Barbara's arms and saying her own goodbyes. "We're going to do this together, Arizona," she insisted as she faced her wife, grasping her hands tightly. "We can do this, because you and I are capable of anything when we're together."

Arizona nodded her agreement, a slight smile tugging at the corners of her mouth.

Grabbing the handle of their luggage in one hand, she pulled Arizona toward her with the other. "You ready?" she asked.

"I'm ready."

* * *

"Do you want the window or the aisle?" Callie asked when they reached their seats aboard Alaska Airlines Flight 2140. The logistics of this trip had been discussed time and time again over the past couple months. When Arizona decided that she was ready to take this journey, Callie immediately started researching flights, fear of flying, coping mechanisms, and anything else that she thought could help make this voyage as successful as possible. They had even spoken with Dr. Wyatt periodically concerning their upcoming trip and its potential fallout. Callie and Arizona discussed everything from their seating arrangement to the time of the flight and type of plane, carry-on luggage versus stowaway, sober versus completely intoxicated. Obviously they decided that a daytime flight would be best, with Arizona and Callie both agreeing that abstaining from alcohol would probably be the most advantageous because they knew that the real trick to making this fully effective was to completely throw themselves into the experience. They both did decide, however, that that didn't necessarily mean that they wouldn't potentially be partaking of multiple alcoholic beverages once the plane landed safely on the ground.

The only issue Arizona was unable to fully decide on was her seat on the plane. She knew that she wanted to sit over the wing because she read that it provided the most stability, but she was wholly noncommittal on window versus aisle. One moment she felt that she would rather be in the window seat because in her mind, she thought that if she could see out the window at all times, if she could see the wing, then the sheer power of her mind could keep the plane flying. On the other hand, she thought maybe the aisle seat would be better because it was less restrictive and for the simple fact that she _wouldn't_ be able to see the cold hard ground below.

"Arizona? Did you hear me?" Callie gently asked as she forced their carry-on into the overhead compartment. "Window or aisle, sweetie?" she repeated as she grasped her wife's trembling hand.

Arizona swallowed the lump that was forming in her throat. "Umm. . .window. I think, window."

"Okay," Callie nodded, her concerned eyes never leaving her wife's unsettled features.

Taking her seat once Arizona was comfortably situation into her own, Callie held her hand between both of hers. "I'm here for you. I'm not going anywhere," she insisted. "The flight is less than an hour and a half, and you and I are totally going to kick its ass."

Arizona smiled slightly as she reached down to buckle her seatbelt. "Thank you for doing this with me, Callie. Thank you for being here."

Callie regarded her wife lovingly. "I promised you I'd go wherever you go, Arizona. There's nowhere else in the world I'd rather be right now than right here with you," she stated as she leaned over to lay claim on moist pink lips. "Oh," she cried, quickly pulling away. "I have something for you," she excitedly said as she began digging through her purse.

Arizona watched her curiously as she dug further into her bag. "This is for you to listen to in case you get tired of hearing my voice," Callie teased as she handed Arizona her iPod and ear buds. "It has a brand new _My Arizona_ playlist on it that I made specifically for this trip, and this. . ." she said as she handed her wife a large leather bound photo album, "is all the pictures from our road trip. I thought we could look through it during the flight."

"When did you have time to make this?" Arizona asked in surprise.

Callie smiled as she watched her wife quickly flip to the first page of pictures. "We've been so bad about having pictures printed from the digital camera, so while I was on maternity leave, I uploaded everything from our computers and your iPad and anywhere else I could think of and had them done. We have tons of pictures that need organized, but I decided to start with this album first."

Arizona gazed tenderly at Callie before looking down toward the photo on the first page. "Oh my goodness," she laughed. "Look at how little Sofia was."

"Hard to believe, isn't it?"

* * *

With more than half of the flight behind them, Arizona closed the final page of the album. "Thanks for that," she said with a smile. "It was. . ." She trailed off when she suddenly felt slightly altered bumps and movements of the plane, different from the smooth ride they had experienced thus far. "Callie. . ."

Immediately noticing the change in her wife's demeanor as her expressive eyes glazed over, Callie quickly kneeled in her seat facing the blonde, bringing her lips close to her ear. "Just stay with me, Arizona," she whispered. "That was just a little bit of turbulence. We're okay. I'm going to keep you safe. Nothing is going to happen to you."

Arizona could only stare straight ahead, beads of sweat forming on her brow, her breaths quickening in pace and her knuckles white from her grasp on the armrests. "We've been through this. You know all about the sights and sounds and movements of a plane," Callie softly continued as she reached up to adjust the cool air valve, opening the nozzle full blast and directing it onto the blonde's face. "You're safe. You're going to be okay." Arizona swallowed harshly, quickly nodding her head. "Breathe with me. Take a deep breath in through your nose and blow it out through your mouth just like you're blowing Sofia and Aiden a kiss."

Arizona did as Callie instructed, the rush of cool air from above helping to calm her heavy breathing. "Close your eyes," she urged. "Let's imagine that we're on a bus."

"A Greyhound Bus?"

"Sure, a Greyhound Bus or even better, our RV," Callie replied as she wrapped her arm around her shoulders. "The turbulence is just like driving over a bumpy road. That's all it is."

Arizona nodded, her shoulders beginning to relax from their tensed position. "Good, sweetie. You're doing _awesome_. Now talk to me. Tell me what you're thinking."

Arizona finally turned toward her wife. "I-I'm taking control," she began.

"Good, babe. That's good. What else?"

"I'm releasing my fear. . .my panic. I'm letting go of my tension and-and my fear and my panic. I'm taking control."

Callie smiled. They had practiced this so many times before with the help of Dr. Wyatt, and she was glad that it was indeed working. "Go on."

"I-I'm releasing my tension. I feel more relaxed. Can I have some water?" she gulped for air.

Callie grabbed a plastic water bottle from her purse. Opening the lid, she handed it to her. After taking a sip, Arizona let out a deep cleansing breath. "I'm okay," she stated, taking another long drag from the bottle. "I'm okay."

Callie looked around the cabin of the plane. "That's great, sweetie," she said proudly. "Because we just landed."

* * *

"From the map Derek gave us, it seems like this is the spot," Callie said from the driver's seat of their rented Jeep Wrangler. "We can't drive any further. We'll have to hike."

Arizona only nodded as she opened the door, stepping from the vehicle. Grabbing a backpack from the floor of the Jeep, she threaded her arms through it pulling it onto her shoulders. Callie watched her curiously as she grabbed her own pack. "I can just as easily call that helicopter charter company and reschedule our appointment for tomorrow if you want. I mean, are you sure we should hike it?" she asked, glancing apprehensively toward the mountainous wilderness terrain.

"Why not? Because_ I_ only have one leg?" Arizona retorted, her tone sounding more annoyed than she intended.

"No!" Callie insisted, "Because_ I _am still carrying around about twelve extra pounds of baby weight and might die before we make it to the top, _and _because I'm afraid you'll leave me in the dust with that new $50,000.00 _"recreational" _leg of yours."

"Ha!" Arizona barked laughter. "Never in my life did I think I'd have a closet full of different legs. Different shoes, obviously. Different purses, of course. But legs? Seriously?"

"It is a pretty _sweet_ leg, though, babe," Callie contended with a smile.

"It is," Arizona admitted, returning her grin. "It really is." She watched Callie once again look nervously toward the mountain. "You'll be fine," she said as she took her wife's hand in hers pulling her in for a quick kiss. "We'll make it."

* * *

"Callie, hold on," Arizona called for her wife who was a few steps ahead of her.

"Oh, thank God!" Callie breathed out, her hands resting on her knees as she tried to catch her breath. Recovering slightly, she looked toward Arizona who stood silently taking in her surroundings. "I-is this the place?" Callie asked as she stepped closer to her.

Arizona didn't speak, but nodded her head as she reached for Callie's arm in an attempt to steady herself. Time seemed to stand still when their eyes locked, Callie stepping closer to support her wife's weight. "Here. . .let's sit down," Callie urged as she pulled the sweatshirt that was knotted around her waist from her body, spreading it on the forest floor.

Arizona sat slowly before Callie settled behind her, wrapping her arms around her waist, their legs outstretched. Callie kissed her cheek before resting her chin on her shoulder.

They sat in silence for several long moments. Callie could feel the quickened pulse at Arizona's neck against her cheek, her breathing slightly irregular. As she looked out on the landscape surrounding them, she couldn't help the conflicting emotions that surged through her. This place - the place that had taken so much from them - how could it be so. . .beautiful? How could the breeze blow so gently through her hair? How could the sun's rays warm her skin so perfectly? How could the birds in the trees still sing? This was nothing like what she expected.

"Over there," Arizona finally said, breaking the tranquil silence. Raising her arm, she pointed in the direction of a clearing surrounded by trees. "Th-that's where I woke up." Callie's gaze followed her wife's outstretched hand. "They found Derek somewhere down that way."

Callie watched as Arizona suddenly stood from her seat. "The front part of the fuselage was here," she pointed to her left. "The middle was over there," she pointed in the opposite direction. "I have no idea what happened to the wings."

"It's all so. . .inconceivable," Callie remarked as she stood to follow her wife. "This place is so beautiful. I just can't even fathom that something so terrible happened here."

"You know, I had that thought," Arizona admitted. "Especially in the mornings. The sun would rise from right over there." Arizona pointed off to her right. "It was breathtaking, and every single morning I wondered how I could find this place so beautiful when I was literally sitting in the middle of so much death and destruction."

She took Callie's hand, leading her over a fallen tree, up a small embankment, and down a grassy slope. "I'm pretty sure that's where the back of the plane ended up. That's where Lexie was. . .trapped," Arizona squeezed her eyes shut, fending off the memories from those harrowing four days. "That's where she died," she continued once she opened her tear moistened eyes.

Callie pulled Arizona into her body, hugging her from behind as she laid a gentle kiss below her right ear. "Sometimes terribly horrible things have to happen before good things can," she whispered. "You and I were made for each other, Arizona. Mark and Lexie were soul mates, too, but unlike you and me, they weren't destined to work out on this earth. They had too many things working against them, so they had to move on to another place so that they could have the chance to be happy together."

Arizona sighed, momentarily leaning back into Callie's embrace. Gently patting the hands resting around her waist, she stepped from her wife's arms, carefully scrutinizing her surroundings. "Sometimes I wake up at night thinking about all the things that could have gone wrong or what could have happened," she said to no one in particular as she meandered about the crash site. "I could have died while Mark and Lexie lived. I could be paralyzed like Jerry," she paused, looking up to the sky, the afternoon sun warming her face. "We all suffered from this. Five of us narrowly escaped death, and we've had to mourn unfathomable losses."

Callie leaned back against a tree, protectively watching her wife as she processed the environment around her. "Someone should have gone for help. Someone should have searched for water. I remember hearing a stream flowing from somewhere over that way," Arizona raised her arm, pointing to the left. "I couldn't do anything. I could hardly move. They were barely able to drag Mark and me under the covering of part of the plane," Arizona shook her head, moving toward that exact spot. "All I could do was wait. So, that's exactly what I did. I waited. . .and while I waited, I thought about you and Sofia. I kept seeing your faces."

Callie took a couple steps closer to her, but stopped when the blonde once again changed direction, pacing to her left. "At some point, I started to lose faith, and I remember hoping that someone would at least find our bodies before we could be eaten by wolves or coyotes or pecked by birds. Callie swallowed thickly, tears beginning to well in her eyes not only because of the words that she was hearing, but also because of the sheer strength emanating from her beautiful wife. "I thought that if rescuers recovered our bodies that you could have a burial and then maybe some closure."

"If I had lost, you, Arizona. . ." Callie spoke softly, shaking her head. "I may have buried your body, but I never would have had closure. You're it for me. I would have carried on for Sofia, and Sofia alone."

Arizona looked around the scenic area one last time before focusing solely on her wife. Standing directly in front of her, she took her hands into hers. "There's no logic to why I lived and others didn't. No science explains why I didn't throw a clot and die. No medicine explains why I suddenly stopped coughing up blood or why I didn't slip into unconsciousness and die in silence. I'm not stronger or-or smarter or better than those who died. Why. . ."

"I don't have the answers to why you were spared, and maybe I'm selfish, but I don't really care _why_," Callie interrupted as she tucked a strand of windblown hair behind Arizona's ear. Sighing, she looked around her. "All I know is that there was a reason. Maybe it was for Sofia or-or me. Maybe it was for Aiden or the hundreds of kids you've saved since the crash. Maybe it just wasn't your time. I don't know, sweetie. No one does." Tightly grasping Arizona's hand, Callie slowly guided her toward the area she had described as Lexie's place of death. Pulling her backpack off her body, she placed it on the ground before kneeling to rummage through it. Looking up into Arizona's crestfallen eyes, she said, "I-I brought a couple things. Umm. . .for Mark and Lexie."

Arizona regarded Callie curiously before placing her left hand on her strong shoulder to support herself as she too lowered herself to the ground. Staring down at the items in her wife's hand, she pressed her lips tightly together. "I think they'll love them," she replied softly.

Callie brushed a tear from her eye with the back of her hand before dusting off the forest floor with her palm. Arranging several rocks into a circle, she handed a picture frame to her wife. Arizona studied it momentarily, running her fingertip over the faces behind the glass. On one side, the double matte frame held a photo of herself, Callie, Mark, and Lexie from their first Thanksgiving together, the other side displaying a photo of herself, Callie, Mark, and Sofia from their daughter's first birthday. "I found these when I printed all of our pictures," Callie explained.

Arizona carefully placed the photos inside the makeshift memorial they had just created as Callie delicately draped Mark and Lexie's stethoscopes over the frame. Clearing her throat, she grasped Arizona's hand. "Shepherd me, O God. . .beyond my wants, beyond my fears. From death into life," she quoted reverently with the sign of the cross before wrapping her arm tightly around the blonde's waist.

Arizona leaned her head against Callie's shoulder, both women lost in their own thoughts and emotions. "It's so unbelievable that I'm actually _here_," Arizona finally spoke, breaking the silence as she motioned to the terrain around them.

Callie lovingly studied her wife, the double meaning of her statement causing a single tear to trickle down her cheek. "All I can say is that I'm glad that you are. No matter what the reason," she said as she pulled Arizona into a tight, comforting embrace.

They stayed on the side of the mountain for a while longer, Arizona continuing to point out sites surrounding them and their significance. "It's getting late, sweetie," Callie informed her a half hour later. "We need to get back to the Jeep before it gets dark."

Arizona nodded her understanding, retrieving Callie's proffered hand. Turning around, Callie stepped forward leading her wife over the uneven terrain. When they reached the spot that Arizona had described as the place where she woke up and ultimately spent most of those four days, Callie heard a hearty sob emanate from deep within her wife, as she released her grip on her hand. Turning back toward her, Callie was saddened to see tears sliding down her cheeks, obvious distress pouring from her every feature.  
"Arizona. . ." she said quietly as she took a step closer to her.

Callie watched as she held up her hand, halting her forward progression. "I-I. . .I'm okay. I just. . .need a minute," Arizona insisted when she stepped away from her. Looking around, she sighed, feeling the sensation of the breeze blowing through her hair, the setting sun warming her upturned face.

As she stood motionless, unabashed tears slid down her face. Standing in the middle of the place where she nearly died, horrific memories flashed through her mind as they overcame each of her senses. Sight - she could see Mark lying unconscious on her lap. Sound - she could hear the strangled cries for help by her colleagues and the vicious snarls of wild animals as they consumed the youngest of their group. Taste - she could still taste the metallic flavor of blood in her parched mouth as she coughed uncontrollably. Smell - she could smell the fuel from the engine of the plane as it mixed with the pungent scent of the infection emanating from the open wound in her leg. Touch - the pain in her leg and entire body was so severe it set every single nerve ending on fire.

Observing her every move with steadfast adoration, Callie fought with the compulsion to comfort her. Understanding Arizona's need to process her emotions on her own, she stood quietly for several moments as she observed the struggle present in her wife's every feature, though she looked almost angelic as blonde hair whipped around her head, the setting sun casting a glow upon the skin of Arizona's flawless face.

As quickly as her reverie began, a feeling of calm serenity soon overtook her troubled mind forcing her fears and memories from her grasp. Closing her eyes, more tears fell as she inhaled deeply through her nose before slowly letting it out. As she wiped at her moist cheeks, Arizona resigned herself to the fact that those four days would never be forgotten and that her heart would always be heavy when she thought of that time. Standing here now, though, finally living after struggling for so long, she smiled slightly when the terrible images of her past left her mind and were replaced by thoughts and visions on her future - of her children and of her wife.

Stepping back into Callie's space, she nuzzled her nose into the crook of her wife's neck. Holding Callie securely to her and looking around over the forest, she watched as the wind stirred up fallen leaves, sweeping over the limbs of bending pine trees. Glancing up to the sky, she smiled as she took a deep cleansing breath. For the first time in three years, she felt that she was now truly able to put the terrible events of that harrowing time behind her. She was now able to fully comprehend and wholly appreciate her life, her family, and each day she had been given. While others had died, she could now truly say that she felt more than ever that she was ready to live.

* * *

"Oh God. That feels so good," Callie moaned as the warmth of the water in the large garden tub of their hotel room permeated her aching muscles. Resting comfortably against Arizona's front, she ran her fingers over the bare arms wrapped tightly around her middle, reveling in the feel of the goose bumps that arose at her touch.

Leaning her head forward, Arizona kissed her wife's temple, then brushed her lips gently along her jawline before nipping at the sensitive skin below her earlobe. "Thank you for today. I really needed it. More than I knew."

Callie turned her head, capturing soft, pink lips with her own. "I think we both needed it," she stated simply when she pulled away. "I can't say that Boise is on my top ten list of vacation spots. . .probably doesn't even make the top fifty," she teased, "but I'm glad we came."

Arizona chuckled as her fingertips grazed over turgid nipples before cupping both breasts in her hands. "Babies make these even more spectacular than they were before," she commented sensuously as she kissed her wife's neck, pinching each hardened bud, her hands delicately holding their weight.

Callie shivered at her wife's pleasing touch. "Our babies make _everything_ spectacular," she replied, her head falling backward onto Arizona's shoulder as her wife continued the ministrations of her tongue and mouth against her neck, one ivory hand trailing down caramel flesh to cup the soft mound of her sex.

Pulling her even closer to her, Arizona pressed her own aching breasts firmly against her wife's back, aroused nipples caressing muscled shoulder blades. "Only a couple more months, though," Callie husked, her hips lifting to press her center firmly against Arizona's hand. "Then they'll be back to normal, but at least you won't have to share them with Aiden anymore."

Arizona smirked seductively as she ran the middle finger of her right hand gently along Callie's slit. Wrapping her right leg over her wife's, she pressed her own hips forward, seeking the erotic friction she desired. "No more talking about our children, Calliope. It's not really appropriate in our current situation," she teased as she laced the fingers of her left hand through her lover's, bringing them to rest below magnificent breasts.

Callie nodded slightly, spreading her legs as wide as the tub would allow when Arizona began rubbing two fingers in exaggerated circles over her eager clit, her eyes closed but her mouth slightly agape. "You're so hot, baby," Arizona husked into her ear. "I can't stop touching you."

"I-I don't mind," Callie stammered, her hips rocking with the rhythm of her wife's deliberate strokes. "In fact, please don't _ever _stop touching me."

Arizona chuckled against the soft skin of her arched neck as she pressed her fingers more firmly against her heated clit. As loud, sharp gasps of pure bliss began rushing from Callie's mouth, she moved her attention from her engorged nub, plunging two fingers deep inside her wife, her motions slow at first, but soon becoming faster and more urgent. "I'm going to make you scream so hard, baby," she promised, her pelvis rocking against Callie's ass.

Callie's hand tightened its grip on the fingers interlaced with her own, her breathing becoming heavier as Arizona nipped and sucked at her pulse point, her talented fingers continuing their agonizing work. "Fuck! Don't stop!" she groaned. "You feel so good inside me. Please don't stop, baby!"

Callie panted harshly as beads of sweat mixed with bath water started to drip down the side of her face. Arizona caught a droplet of moisture with her tongue, her body grinding against Callie's as she torturously slid her fingers out from within to caress swollen folds. The tip of her middle finger then grazed over Callie's erect clit before briefly rubbing furious circles over it. "Please, Arizona. Please," Callie begged in a husky whisper as she neared her breaking point.

Sensing her lover's need, Arizona plunged in deeper, burying her fingers inside Callie's slick opening before pausing momentarily, slowly withdrawing and immediately thrusting them back in again. She stimulated her wife deeper and deeper as Callie's hips began to buck and writhe in a frenzied rush. Curling her fingers to deliberately massage the spot deep within her, Arizona tipped her head forward, forcing Callie to turn toward her so she could claim her lips, her tongue stroking the recesses of her mouth.

In a wild eruption of ecstasy, Callie's back arched, a low guttural moan coming from deep within as her body shuddered, her core contracting with uncontrollable spasms as unadulterated pleasure surged through her. "Arizona!" she screamed in uninhibited satisfaction, her left hand clutching her wife's, her right hooking behind her to grasp at the hair at the back of the blonde's head.

Nuzzling her nose against Callie's as her body continued to tremble, Arizona stilled her fingers as the Latina's orgasm subsided. "I told you I'd make you scream," she breathed before tirelessly moving her fingers once more. After a few more gently strokes, Callie's eyes rolled into the back of her head as she cried out again, her body stiffening as a second earth shattering climax consumed her.

Arizona gently caressed Callie's thighs and abdomen with one hand, the other continuing to hold her tightly. Whispering hushed promises and _I love yous_ into her ear, she lovingly coaxed her down from her orgasmic high. Taken completely by surprise, she could only comply when Callie quickly turned in her arms, water sloshing up over the side of the tub and splashing to the floor as she pushed her upward to sit on the wide ledge of the tub. Slowly kissing down her stomach, Callie pressed her legs open as she nudged her nose against the delectable clit she could see peeking out from under its hood. Resting her tongue against it, she looked up at her wife, her tongue never straying from its motionless position. "I can feel you throbbing against my tongue," she husked before swirling it languidly through slippery wet folds.

Arizona grasped at her own flushed breasts, her head falling back against the tiles of the bath as her hips arched with abandon, longing to feel her own blinding, pulsing moment of release. Callie smirked against the velvety smooth skin of her core as her mouth strayed from its moist depths to worship her inner thighs with insistent bites and sucks.

"Don't be a tease," Arizona demanded as she laced her hands through thick brunette tresses, harshly tugging her wife's head toward her pulsating core to unceremoniously force her face deeper into her tight womanhood. "Now. I need you to make me come _right now_," she insisted, her grasp on her wife's head unrelenting.

Despite Arizona's desperation, Callie gently spread her folds with her thumb and index finger, teasing her clit with light flicks of her tongue. She watched as her lover's center visibly clenched before running her tongue from her entrance all the way up to her bundle of nerves. Instead of focusing on the aching nub, Callie sucked at both outer lips before burying her pointed tongue deep inside her. "Oh God, Callie!" Arizona moaned, pulling sharply at her hair as her hips began bucking and writhing in a perfect rhythm with Callie as she fucked her with her tongue.

Arizona's hips writhed uncontrollably, and Callie had to pin her down with her arms to keep her in place. When she felt her muscles begin to pulsate around her tongue, Callie quickly withdrew before immediately entering her with a singular driving thrust of two fingers as she sucked her engorged clit forcefully into her mouth. "Oh my God! Yes, Callie! Fuck me, baby!" Arizona screamed as she violently ground her hips against the Latina's face. With one final animalistic cry, Arizona's eyes slammed shut, her thighs clamping tightly around Callie's head as her world exploded with a blood-rushing climax. As she rode the waves of sheer ecstasy, goose bumps covered her wet body and she shuddered with each pulsating wave of pleasure.

Callie lapped at the slippery essence that continued to pour from her wife's hot core until Arizona's body relaxed, her fingers finally releasing their hold on her tangled locks.

"Oh my God," Arizona breathed hoarsely when Callie looked up at her, smirking sexily as she pulled her back into the now tepid water with a splash.

Callie kneeled in front of her, their tender breasts thrust together as she slipped her hot tongue into her wife's mouth. Arizona moaned at the intoxicating flavor of herself on her lips as she sucked her tongue further and further into her mouth. When they finally pulled away for air, Callie arched a perfectly manicured eyebrow and giggled at the pleasantly dazed look on the blonde's face. Stepping from the bath, she wrapped a plush terrycloth robe around herself before moving to assist her wife into standing. Wrapping a robe around her completely sated body, Callie helped her from the tub before pressing her firmly against a wall of the bathroom. "I think we need to take advantage of this one night away," she husked into Arizona's ear before once again capturing her mouth with hungry urgency.

"What?" _Peck. _"Did?" _Peck. _"You have?" _Peck. _"In mind?" Arizona grinned when she finally returned to her senses.

Callie chuckled as her hand slid beneath the material of the blonde's robe to caress the silky ivory skin of her abdomen. "I'm about to show you."

* * *

A week later, Arizona navigated their BMW X5 up the driveway and into the garage, groaning softly when she looked at the digital clock on the console.

1:37am.

Her uneventful twelve hour shift had gone terribly wrong when a half hour before its end a busload of high school baseball players collided with an eighteen wheeler. She and Karev worked feverishly on the six injured athletes and now seven hours and zero casualties later, she dragged her exhausted body from the vehicle. Grabbing her bag from the back seat of the car, she trudged through the garage and into the house.

As she entered their home, the faint smell of chocolate assaulted her senses as she recalled that they had agreed to take brownies to daycare the following day. Smiling at the thought of Sofia _helping _in the endeavor, she pictured the four year old licking excess chocolate from a wooden spoon, her face covered with the sweet dessert as Aiden sat happily banging spoons and spatulas against the tray of his highchair.

The light over the kitchen sink was lit, safely guiding her way toward the winding staircase that led to her sleeping family. Arizona sighed, saddened by the fact that she had missed out on dinner time, as well as bath time, story time, and bedtime. Reaching the top of the stairs, she first peaked into the Jungle Safari themed nursery, expecting to see Aiden resting peacefully in his crib. Finding only an empty room, she assumed that Callie had the baby with her in the master bedroom, so she tiredly meandered further down the hallway to check on Sofia. Surprised to find her bed empty as well, Arizona finally pushed open the door to the master bedroom, her breath hitching at the vision before her.

In the center of the king size bed lit only by a small bedside lamp, Callie slept propped up against the headboard, Aiden's tiny body secured protectively against her chest with one arm, the other wrapped around Sofia as the little girl snuggled into her side. Arizona smiled at the sight, sure that Callie had experienced more than a little resistance from Sofia when it came to bedtime.

Stepping further into the room, she toed off her shoes before guiding her jeans down her legs. Settling her exhausted body into her wheelchair, she pulled off her prosthesis, deliberately massaging the aching limb. Propelling herself to the dresser, she pulled pajamas from the middle drawer before entering the en suite bathroom.

Fifteen minutes later, she re-emerged to find her family in the exact position as before. Quietly wheeling to her side of the bed, she gingerly transferred herself to the edge of the mattress before positioning herself comfortably under the plush duvet.

Feeling the bed move under her, Callie reflexively held Aiden closer to her, protectively running her hand up and down his back. Blinking several times, her eyes finally opened as she looked to her right to make sure Sofia was safe beside her. The weary, but sparkling blue eyes she found watching her as an ivory hand stroked their daughter's belly caused a smile to tug at her lips. "Hey," she whispered through a fog of sleep.

"Hey," Arizona replied as she leaned up on her elbow to kiss her cheek.

"We missed you," Callie stated as she glanced between their children. "What happened with the baseball players?"

"I missed you, too." Arizona sighed. ". . .they all made it. Did you have a rough night?"

Callie chuckled softly, rolling her eyes. "There was sugar and flour all over the kitchen, and Sofia literally had chocolate from head to toe when I finally got her into the bathtub."

"You made the brownies from scratch?" Arizona asked in surprise. "I would have just made them from the box."

Callie scoffed. "So not my style, babe," she replied with a laugh. "And besides, Little Miss insisted on calling Grammy for her recipe."

Arizona chuckled at the thought of her mother assisting Sofia with the baking. "How was Aiden?" she asked as she ran her hand along the soft dark hair at the back of his head.

"Perfect, of course," Callie remarked as she looked down at his prostrate form. Sitting up, she started to scoot toward the edge of the bed. "I'm going to take him to the nursery."

Arizona bit her bottom lip, fighting with herself momentarily before giving in to her thoughts. "No, wait," she urged. "I didn't get to spend any time with them today. Can they sleep with us tonight?"

Callie turned around, smiling at the request. "Sure," she shrugged as she carefully handed the sleeping baby to his momma. Settling him onto the mattress between herself and his sister, Arizona snuggled into her pillow, her hand resting protectively against his chest.

Callie flicked off the bedside lamp, their room now dimly lit by the street lights below as they shone through the windows with a silvery glow. Reaching across Sofia with her left arm, she gently rested her palm against the back of Arizona's hand. Drawing random patterns over her wrist with her thumb, her brown eyes locked with the blue orbs of the woman she loved. "Goodnight, sweetie," she whispered.

"Goodnight, Calliope," Arizona replied in a hushed whisper. "I love you."

A smile tugged at the corners of her lips. "I love you, too."

* * *

**AN2: **The small prayer Callie says at their makeshift memorial is from Psalm 23.

**AN3: **A big thank you (as always) to Funkyshaz57 for her help in guiding me through the part of this epilogue that I literally wrote six times!

**AN4: **I hope you enjoyed this little addition to Callie and Arizona's journey. Thanks so much for continuing to read and review!


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